by J. L. Wood
“Countdown started a minute ago. Go on now. Go be somebody.” Giving him a playful wink, Jessica motioned for Bryan to move along. He waved awkwardly, his face burning with embarrassment, then hurried off to his team. As he left the office, she could hear his footsteps turn into a jog and then into a run down the long low-lit corridor back to the lab of sleep-deprived astrophysicists.
When she could no longer hear Bryan’s footsteps, Jessica shut the door and kicked off her black heels, letting her toes sink into her plush Persian rug. These shoes were just not practical for continuous wear, so she mostly wore them for aesthetics. She missed the way Cadence Science used to be, relaxed and accepting. Today, she was just another corporate drone, signing papers and delegating. She hated delegating just as much as she hated playing dress-up. She wanted to return to her old job in the lab with Bryan, get her hands dirty, get into the data with her underlings. While potential candidates were clawing their way into Cadence Science, Jessica was slowly removing herself. The prestige of the company, the paycheck, and the position were unimportant to her. If all those perks disappeared, it would not matter. This was not what she’d signed up for. Everything was different.
She had secured her position at Cadence through hard work and determination in the hopes of making contact with something extraordinary in the realm of uncertainty. Although that day was not today, through the study of radio waves and the detection of fast radio bursts, she and her teams were tracking the destruction of planets millions of light-years away. Each day that she tracked, she hoped to find something that would confirm that life on Earth was not as meaningless as she believed it seemed. In truth, she had no idea what she was looking for, exactly; she just knew it would be something grand and that she would know it when she found it.
Jessica’s passion for the unknown stemmed from her childhood. Sometimes, late at night after his last cigarette of the day, her father would rush into her room, startling her awake.
“There’s a UFO outside!” he would shout. “Grab your camera. Quick!”
Jessica would dart out of bed, grabbing her Mickey Mouse slippers and camera, push the front door open, and run to her father’s old beat-up Ford.
“Where is it!” Jess would yell in excitement. Her father would lift her onto the hood of the old junker, gently take her hand, and position her index finger toward the UFO. Narrowing her eyes into the distance, she focused until she saw the speck of light gliding effortlessly. The hairs on her arms would stand up straight, and she’d suddenly feel weightless and wobbly, as if at any moment she would fall from that hood and onto the dirt road. Her father would never let her fall, that she knew very well. He was there to protect her, even as she documented these invaders. After securing a fresh roll of film in her father’s vintage camera, she focused on the object and took a picture using the flash, which hardly lit up the pitch-black sky.
“Take a few more, Jess,” her father would say. “NASA needs many pictures.” Jess focused the camera again and took another picture, and then another, until the roll of film was at its end.
Jess’s discovery nights were the most terrifying when her father went to bed, because then she was left alone with her thoughts. The window in her room terrified her. If the aliens saw her taking their picture, they could easily open her bedroom window and snatch her up. No one would know where she was. She wouldn’t know where she was. She could be gone for hours or days, maybe even an eternity.
Little Jess could spend a hundred lifetimes being studied by these aliens, and her father wouldn’t be able to save her. Even at eleven, Jess was a keen problem solver. She would snuggle up tight under her blanket and place her white teddy bear, Rachel, on her pillow. If the aliens ever did come for her, maybe they would grab Rachel instead, leaving Jess safe at least one more day. That would buy her enough time for her father to get her to a safe hiding place.
As the years went by and the canisters of camera film were never developed—her father always said they went “missing” or “NASA confiscated them and were demanding more”— Jess began to understand that alien encounters were not so simple. For her sweet sixteen, her parents gifted her a telescope, and at that point, she began to learn of the great beyond and that those white flashing lights in the sky were just satellites circling the world in near-Earth orbit.
The satellites and missing photos made her realize that her father had put her on a path of unexplored territory. He’d created hope and wonder in her, which pushed her into her current field. And until she was able to direct her father’s hand to an actual place in the sky where aliens existed, she would never stop searching.
*
Dr. Jessica Koland shielded her eyes from the bright lights of the projector. This was not her first rodeo, but each time she had to present to the board, it created excruciating unrest for her. Her stomach felt as if someone had tied her intestines into several bows and then stuffed them back in. These types of encounters were outside of her realm. The conference room was some other universe that her human form was not designed for. It very well could have been a level of Hell.
“Questions?” she asked the silent room of board members. “Comments?”
Jessica scanned the room, trying to gauge the vibe of her audience, but there were just expressionless faces staring back at her. Eight empty hulls. Seven little nobodies following one big somebody. She wanted to scream at them to have an opinion, to have a thought of their own, but she knew they would keep looking at their CEO, waiting for instruction. To break the silence, she continued. “I would like to request the use of Caprice immediately. We need imagery on the planetary system Lerner 4, in the Southern Pinwheel Galaxy, Messier 83. Data from the eight fast radio bursts named FRBM83-L4B to FRBM83-L4I, combined with the imagery, could provide a wealth of opportunities for research at Cadence Science.”
Jessica knew that would draw them in, although her real reason for investigation was the hope of finding extraterrestrial activity. The frequency of these FRBs was unlike anything she had ever seen. They all originated from Lerner 4, all with the same pattern of threes. A millisecond of burst every three minutes, then six minutes, then nine minutes, all the way to twenty-one, then a forty-two-minute pause and repeat. Something was happening in Messier 83, something that they could set their watches to, and the world needed to know. Jessica wanted to let them know.
As usual, Dr. Delilah Ndiaye was the first and only board member to intervene. “Jessica, we have been to Messier 83. It is well documented and has been picked over constantly for the last decade. The star formation in that galaxy is astronomical—we all know that. What is important for this company, seeing as it will have the most potential to make us money—and we all love money, right?—is SPERANTIS-1b in the Sculptor Galaxy. Through the NASA Collaboration, we were granted the Caprice to find a second home. It is our only focus.”
Delilah paused and nodded, waiting for the other board members to nod as well. And they did, following her lead. She continued. “Caprice is nearly there, and if our research is proven correct—that we can support life there—you can bet that Cadence Science will be the first to plant our flag, along with the American flag, and become the ultimate leaders in space exploration. Not to mention all of the reward money we will receive.”
Dr. Ndiaye stood up from her cushy leather chair and turned to the room, her office politics on point. “Dr. Koland merely found something interesting. Interesting. But what she failed to find was something profitable.” She proceeded to pull her reading glasses out of her blazer and rested them on the edge of her nose while referring to her tablet. As Delilah began to read from it, Jessica knew it was over. She was not going to get the Caprice.
“Since 2032, your team has an accumulated loss of 4.2 million dollars, while my team has a gain of 9.1. Your team has misidentified radio waves several times, which is strange, because that is what you specialize in. My team has published more papers and provided more research to the NASA Collaboration than I care to admit. Tha
t is why we have the Caprice—from those efforts. Cadence Science needs the Caprice working with my team for at least the next two years. I’m sorry, but you’ve wasted your time here today.” Delilah Ndiaye sat back in her chair and crossed her legs, her upper thigh peeking out from the shortness of her skirt.
Jessica refused to be petty and confrontational like Delilah. Those words stung, and another tight bow developed in her intestines, but she believed in this, and she believed in her team. She approached the head of the office table and slowly exhaled. Jessica thought of something she could see, feel, taste, hear, and smell to ground herself. She could see the abstract painting on the far wall of the conference room, feel the smooth wood of the conference table, and smell Delilah’s awful, gaudy perfume, which in itself was enough to bring her back to the moment. She needed to keep going. She needed to fight.
“I understand where Delilah is coming from. Yes, my team has a history of underperforming. Yes, she has an excellent team of knowledgeable professionals. Yes, SPERANTIS-1b could possibly be a second home. Possibly. If you don’t mind the extreme temperatures due to the tidal locking, seeing as how one side of the exoplanet is always facing the sun. We know that maybe there isn’t anything better out there, which is why you jumped the gun to the first place you think we could call second home.
“That aside, there is something that I need you all to understand today. We can always send our exploration teams to SPERANTIS-1b. We’ve already communicated that that is where we are headed, so none of our competitors are headed that way. But right now, only we can investigate these FRBs. They may not be coming in a week from now.
“If you could please refer to Appendix C in the report we provided, you will see that these fast radio bursts are getting stronger and closer. Something is about to happen—something magnificent, and we have the opportunity to see it, record it, and document it. Don’t pass up this once-in-a-lifetime opportunity.”
David Malick tried to scoot closer to the table, but his enormous stature kept him at least a foot away. Beads of sweat dotted his forehead. Even the simple act of moving was too taxing on his large frame. Every time Jessica looked at him, her mind would play tricks, and she would imagine she was looking at the fabled egg, Humpty Dumpty. Chief Executive Officer Dumpty turned to Delilah, who gave him a simple nod. Their body language was peculiar. Jessica often wondered if Delilah called in favors with David, favors of an unprofessional nature. The team did have a saying, after all: “What Delilah wants, Delilah gets.”
Delilah was an opportunist and always played her cards right. It didn’t help that she was so attractive for her age. Nearly fifty-five, she looked to be in her early thirties, with her silky-smooth dark skin and bright eyes. She always looked so refreshed and well put together, the embodiment of money and expensive surgeons. A woman who lived in front of a mirror, touching up her makeup and taking photos of herself. “For my photo diary,” she would say. “I like to see my progress.” Jessica had never met someone so vain, especially in this field. Sometimes she wondered if Delilah really knew anything about this industry at all. Perhaps she just knew that stars were pretty and outer space was scattered with dollar signs.
David huffed as he fidgeted in his chair. “Thanks for your report, Dr. Koland. It was not only enlightening, but fascinating, really. We appreciate your efforts, but I must say, this is not where the revenue is at this particular time. We cannot grant you the Caprice. I suggest you continue to monitor these bursts, as you have been, and in five days, as you projected, we will reconvene to review them. After that, we need to have a series of discussions on your team’s performance and goals.”
“Wait,” Jessica said. “If I can’t have the Caprice, can we work with the NASA Collaboration? One of the English exploration teams, Bailey Current, just published a paper on FRBs to the Collaboration database. Perhaps they would be interested in this discovery.”
David dabbed at the sweat near his thinning blond hairline with a handkerchief and looked around the table. “No. It seems you keep missing the point. This is a race to a second home, not a goddamned moonwalk. Your current assignment is to assist in the discovery of where we should and should not go. All findings should stay internal for the time being. Dismissed.”
The fellow drones silently left the conference room, none willing to look at Jessica. The bows in her stomach began to unravel all at once, causing a sickening feeling, as if her body was turning to mush. At any moment, she could melt into the floor, through the cracks in the hardwood, and into the room below, where she would eventually drip into an old mop bucket.
Delilah hung around near the back of the crowd, waiting for everyone to exit. As she neared the door, she closed it and approached Jessica. “I know what you’re up to. You try to take anything away from my projects again, and I will not be so civil. Your pathetic search for aliens needs to end. We have new leadership, and they won’t put up with your silly investigations. Kenny may have enjoyed your escapades, but David did not.
“No one cares about the Southern Pinwheel Galaxy. Everything is about the bottom line now. Money talks, so do yourself a favor and fall in line.” Dr. Ndiaye straightened her blazer, waiting for Jessica to acknowledge her. The Caprice was still hers, and although David owned the company, she had conned her way into owning all their souls.
Jessica never fully put up a fight, which led Delilah to believe she was weak. This environment did not suit Jess well. She was still that little girl who looked up at the stars with her father, not fit to fight or argue. When it came to fight or flight, she always chose the latter. She imagined the Caprice crashing on SPERANTIS-1b, exploding upon entry, pieces of ship and debris flying out everywhere. Delilah burning alive, her screams in space nothing. She would become nothing. But the reality was that Delilah was here, and it would be her innocent crew that died. Jess shook those thoughts from her mind.
“I wish you the best,” she replied. “Thank you for your time.”
Delilah stepped back. “You’re swimming upstream, Jessica. The bears are waiting, and we will devour you whole.” She whisked herself out of the room, her heels echoing in the empty space, while Jessica smiled at how much she could affect Delilah with so little effort.
Cadence Science had changed dramatically over the past three years, and Jessica was still not accustomed to the new cutthroat structure. The previous owner, Kenny Malick, David’s late father, was an astronomer who began the company because of his passion for discovery. His small company in Houston focused on research that they would make available for public consumption. Kenny had always let all of his employees research anything that they thought would help us better understand the universe—he set no limits. That was what first drew Jessica to this company: the freedom to research as she liked and the acceptance that nothing she did would be criticized. Critiqued, yes, but never shamed. Any experience was a learning experience to Kenny, which also meant that money was always tight for the company.
Their main revenue was a small spacecraft that would take students just outside of Earth’s orbit in an attempt to get them interested in his field. That was his goal, his dream. The world needed more scientists, more thinkers, more believers. There had been a steady decline of students interested in astronomy, which led to scarce partnerships with other companies, including longstanding vacancies in his own. Students who did study astronomy were usually grabbed by large companies that paid extremely well but sold their research. Kenny didn’t believe in selling research; he wanted all companies to unite and trade information so that everyone could improve. He wanted freedom of information, and in order to provide such a service, people had to feel the need in their hearts, not their wallets.
The NASA Collaboration tried to resolve information hoarding in the 2020s by soliciting countries who agreed to an eternal peace rule with a governing body of representatives from each country. Only six countries agreed: the United States, Canada, the United Kingdom, Japan, India, and Russia. All shuttle programs in thos
e countries then became part of the Collaboration. They were the explorers of the 2020s. They were the pathfinders.
Exploration was Kenny’s life’s dream. Room and board upon the Cadence were free for high school students, but it operated on donations alone. There always seemed to be just enough money to keep Cadence Science running and the researchers employed. No one asked for more, but they certainly could not work for any less.
When Kenny passed away from a cerebral aneurysm, his son, David, took the reins. David differed so much from his father that Jessica often wondered if he really was his biological son. David put a halt to all free spaceship rides and secretly limited research given to the Collaboration in an effort to stay ahead of other companies. Everything now had a fee, and only those with $350,000 could ride the Cadence, which he quickly renamed the Malick. Cadence Science quickly began to turn a profit, salaries increased, more teams were made, and the now for-profit company was regarded as one of the most profitable space companies in the United States.
The failed meeting was not just a loss for Jessica and her team today—it was a loss for her team every day thereafter. Cadence Science was not interested in their work because it produced no immediate monetary gain. Her only option was to resign and find another small company that was still passionate about spreading knowledge and learning about the intricacies of the universe. As the tears of disappointment attempted to fall, she looked around the room to ground herself again.
“Dr. Koland?” a voice asked behind her. Jessica turned around to find Justin Sage, the lead spaceship navigator on Delilah’s team. How long had he been standing in the conference room? Was he even in the meeting that had just concluded? Justin was an odd person. He seemed to always be around in the most random of places, just staring into empty space. One side of his black polo shirt was covered in cat hair, his own short black hair parted to the side and combed neatly, with some white mixed in. Were those gray hairs? No, she was almost positive it was cat hair. He seemed to almost hunch over, the form of someone who lived in front of a computer, still young enough to correct but not an option with his lifestyle.