He wasn’t going to take her home.
And that meant that, somehow, he had to provide for her. A roof over her head, food, and comfort. If it was only him, he had no problem traipsing around the country, living hand to mouth, but he couldn’t do that to Regal.
She needed more.
He wasn’t sure why he should trust Godfrey with the referral to his cousin, but the truth was that Godfrey had been right – he couldn’t go anywhere where people knew him. He couldn’t jeopardize them like that. Perhaps going to Godfrey’s cousin could be a temporary measure until he could think clearly, for now, he couldn’t think at all past the sorrow in his heart.
He couldn’t think at all.
At the moment, he realized he was fighting off tears. He hadn’t cried since he’d been a very young lad and, now, all he wanted to do was weep. Weep for Teodora, for those he’d disappointed or shamed, for everything. But he wouldn’t do it in front of these two hyenas. He had to get clear of them, and of Westminster, and take Regal away from London.
He had to do it before he broke down completely.
Without another word, Cullen turned from them, rushing up the slippery steps and through the unguarded door. When he’d gone, Hamilton and Godfrey hesitantly followed his trail until they reached the doorway but they didn’t follow it any further; they were simply glad to have escaped the situation with their lives.
It could have so easily been much different.
“Do you think he believed us?” Godfrey whispered.
Hamilton was looking out to the garden beyond but he didn’t see anything moving. Cullen had an incredible ability to travel in stealth.
“I do not know,” he muttered. “But he is leaving and that is all that matters.”
“Do you think he meant what he said?”
“What do you mean?”’
“That he will be back… for us.”
Hamilton snorted, but it was without humor. “Cullen de Nerra never says anything he does not mean,” he said. “Compensation from the king will be the only thing that makes the fact that we’ll have to look over our shoulders for the rest of our lives worth the risk. Do not think of Cullen’s threat, Godfrey; think of being the Earl of Barklestone someday. This will be worth it in the end.”
Godfrey tried, but visions of Cullen de Nerra blocked out the joy he felt over such a thing.
He knew he would be seeing the man in his sleep from now on.
“Come on,” Hamilton finally said, breaking into his train of thought. “Now that we have taken care of de Nerra, it is time to take care of Lady Barklestone.”
He headed out across the moonlit garden as Godfrey shuffled after him.
“Do you think the guards will let us see her?” he asked anxiously.
Hamilton seemed confident. “We are on a mission from her husband,” he said. “Of course they will let us see her.”
Godfrey hoped that was the case. Hamilton had been right about Cullen; he hoped the man was right about Lady Barklestone. He hoped the situation went as easily.
Playing God felt rather good to him.
CHAPTER SIXTEEN
Farringdon House, London
Townhome of William Marshal
The guards at the fortified townhome near the western edge of London recognized him, so they let him in.
Cullen had a tiny old woman with him, one he was moving rather slowly with. And once they opened the fortified gate, he picked the woman up and carried her in, straight through an enclosed courtyard and into the house itself.
It was dark at this late hour as he was greeted at the door by the majordomo, who knew him on sight and quickly ushered him inside. As the majordomo sent someone to bring William Marshal, Cullen took Regal upstairs to a small chamber indicated by the majordomo, where he sat her upon the bed so she could rest while he conducted business with The Marshal.
It was business he wasn’t looking forward to.
He had failed.
That would be the primary focus of the conversation. He’d failed in his mission to watch Preston de Lacy and report back on the man’s activities, and the reason for his failure was going to be difficult to put into words. Knights didn’t have feelings, and they certainly didn’t fall in love with their liege’s wife. But that was exactly what Cullen was preparing to tell him.
It wasn’t going to be pretty.
Cullen ended up in The Marshal’s enormous second-floor solar where the man conducted almost all of his important business. It was an elaborate chamber with painted walls and hides on the floor. Much of England’s business for the past several decades had been conducted here, giving the chamber a heady feel. It was timeless and powerful. As he stood there, feeling rather stunned at the events of the evening and struggling to gain a handle on his grief, a servant entered and quietly, quickly, started a fire in the hearth.
When the fire was snapping and the man vacated the chamber, Cullen made his way over to the blaze, feeling the warmth on his face as he stared into the flames and wondering how he was expected to move on with his life after this. He’d destroyed it more completely than if he’d planned to do such a thing. Not only was the woman he loved dead, but his career was in tatters.
He had nothing left.
“I heard.”
The voice came from the doorway as William entered the chamber. He was wrapped up in a heavy robe and appeared weary. But he was alert, and those yellow-tinged eyes were riveted to Cullen. Cullen stood straight, facing him as bravely as he could.
“Who told you?”
William’s gaze lingered on him a moment before coming into the chamber and heading toward the hearth.
“De Lara,” he said. “He sent word. You know that he is my eyes on the king.”
“I know.”
“You gored Barric Fitz Hammond and attacked the king as they were seducing de Lacy’s new wife. You are now a hunted man.”
It sounded rather foolish as he heard the situation come from William’s lips. All he could do was confess.
“I am, my lord.”
William reached the hearth, sighing faintly as his gaze moved to the flames. He rubbed a weary hand over his face. “I would hear your side of it, Cullen,” he said. “You must have had a good reason.”
Cullen thought he did, but he knew William wasn’t going to see it that way. All he could do was be honest and throw himself on the man’s mercy.
“My lord, I am, if nothing else, an honest man,” he said. “But I am not perfect. You will not agree with my reason for doing what I did, but I will be truthful with you. I did it because of Lady Barklestone.”
“To protect your liege’s wife? I realize you were only doing your duty, but that seems a bit extreme considering…”
“I love her.”
William looked at him, then, his gray eyebrows lifting in disbelief. “You love her?”
Cullen nodded, without hesitation. “Preston de Lacy is a vile beast,” he said. “I have spent two years with the man and, in that time, I have seen him do things that any sane man would find revolting. You warned me about him, my lord, and you were correct. The man is deplorable. He married Teodora de Rivington because his stupid nephew, Ridley, got himself murdered. The only plan he had for Teodora was to use her against her father, who is a supporter of the king, and I am sure Teddy’s father had the exact same plans – to use his daughter against Preston.”
William nodded, but it was clear his patience was waning as he realized the explanation out of Cullen’s mouth was not what he had expected.
“I know,” he said. “You reported this to me. Get to the point.”
Cullen could sense his great displeasure and he went on, hoping William might understand some part of his excuse.
But he doubted it.
“The point is that the man refused to consummate his marriage and commanded me to do it instead,” he said. “What was first a distasteful duty quickly became something else. I came to know a bright woman, a beautiful woman, and a wom
an who did not deserve the fate she’d been dealt in life. It was my failing, my lord. I fell in love with her. I never planned to, hoped to, or expected to. But I did. And I do not regret it.”
William gazed at him unhappily. “De Lara did not tell me any of this.”
“That is because no one knows.”
William eyed him before turning away from the hearth, heading toward a table that contained a wine pitcher and cups. The urge to drink, heavily, had come upon him.
“Cullen,” he finally hissed, shock in his tone. “Tell me this is a nightmare. Tell me you did not destroy everything we have been working to accomplish with de Lacy because of a woman.”
Cullen could feel the man’s disappointment. “I wish it was not the truth, but it is,” he said. “If I return to de Lacy, I will undoubtedly be arrested over the murder of Fitz Hammond, not to mention my assault against the king.”
William looked at him. “Fitz Hammond is dead?”
“De Lara did not mention that he was?”
“Nay, but then again, his message was short. It involved the immediate situation, not the aftermath.”
Cullen shrugged. “I cut Barric cleanly through. When last I saw him, he was bleeding out on the floor.”
William didn’t much care about Barric Fitz Hammond, but he did care about the king. “And John?”
Cullen shook his head. “I never touched him,” he said. “I broke into the chamber as he was assaulting Lady Barklestone and killed Barric when he charged me. I am sure the mere act of breaking into the chamber constitutes assault in John’s eyes. But you should know that I also threatened him for touching Lady Barklestone.”
William sighed heavily, with great displeasure. “God, no,” he breathed. “You threatened the king? Tell me what happened from the beginning and leave nothing out.”
Cullen lifted his big shoulders. “There is not much more to tell, to be truthful,” he said. “Lady Barklestone was in the hall and Hamilton Banbury said she spilled wine on her gown, so he took her to a private chamber where it could be cleaned. Or mayhap it was to change into another gown, I am not entirely certain. In any case, Hamilton says that he left her there alone, but the truth was that John was either in the chamber at the time or slipped in shortly thereafter. Upon realizing what had happened, I followed Hamilton’s path and when I heard the screams, I broke down the door and found Lady Barklestone with the king on top of her. Barric was standing next to the bed, I am assuming, waiting his turn with the lady.”
William shook his head in disgust. This was not a new story with the king but, this time, it happened to a woman with a noble knight for a protector. A knight who wasn’t going to let the lady fall victim to the king’s lust, as so many women had before her. It was both an honorable and foolish inclination, and one that would cost him dearly.
“So you broke into the chamber,” he muttered. “Then what?”
“Fitz Hammond rushed me with a dagger so I lifted my sword and disabled him,” he said. “I did not charge him first, I assure you. Once Fitz Hammond was bleeding on the floor, I told the king that anyone who should attack Lady Barklestone would have to deal with me. The king told me that my life is forfeit because of it.”
William just shook his head, wagging it back and forth in utter disbelief. “You know better than to do what you did, de Nerra,” he said. “You know the king has an eye for women and there are noblemen who go to great lengths to hide their wives and daughters from him because of it. Why did you just not hide the woman? Why let her attend the feast at all?”
Cullen knew this was only the beginning of the scolding he was about to receive, if not worse. “Because you are well aware of de Lacy’s relationship with the king and when he was invited to the feast, he immediately accepted,” he said. “The man does not want his opposition to be known to the king, so attending his feast would show a feigned sense of loyalty. Preston would rather lie to your face and then stab you in the back. He is not a forthright individual.”
William waved him off. “Spare me your assessment of de Lacy, for that is the least of my worries now,” he said. “What I want to know is who brought the woman to the king? De Lara said it was not him.”
Cullen’s features darkened. “That is because it was not,” he said. “It was Hamilton Banbury. It is my very strong belief that both he and Godfrey Sudeley are loyal to John. You know that they spend almost all of their time at Rodstone House when Preston is away from London. There is plenty of opportunity to accept John’s bribes and, if that is the case, with me no longer there to protect him, Preston’s days are numbered. I will not be able to prevent his own knights from assassinating him.”
That was critical information as far as William was concerned, even more than Lady Barklestone’s imprisonment or Cullen’s actions. He settled into the nearest chair, weary and disturbed from the night’s events. But above all, he was a man who thought quickly, no matter what the circumstance, and he knew this situation was going to get out of hand given the news of traitors in de Lacy’s midst. Cullen was correct – without him there as a barrier, de Lacy was vulnerable. He leaned against the side of the chair, chin in his hand.
“His death would not be for the best,” he finally said. “Ultimately, I sent you to watch over de Lacy because he is an unpredictable man with a big army. But if his own knights are under the control of the king, that is not ideal. At his death, his properties and army will revert to the crown and John would have control of a large portion of Lincolnshire. I do not believe that would be a good situation at all.”
“Why?”
William continued to stroke his chin. “Because John has too many foreign favorites,” he said. “De Lacy may be unpredictable and subversive, but at least he is English. He can be controlled somewhat and he is loyal to England as a whole. If John gives his properties to one of his Savoyard favorites, that puts another Frenchman in charge of a big English army. That is something we do not want to see.”
Cullen felt foolish for not realizing that. “What will you do, my lord?”
William shook his head. “I may have to pay a visit to de Lacy myself to discuss this situation,” he said. “Or mayhap I will gift him with another knight who will not fall in love with his wife, a man to be a barrier between him and those trying to assassinate him. In any case, I will do as I must. I will fix the chaos that you left behind. But the fact remains that I cannot fix you, Cullen. You have a problem.”
Cullen couldn’t disagree and, in truth, he deserved the insult to his honor. He had, indeed, fallen in love with another man’s wife. Quietly, he cleared his throat.
“You needn’t worry about me,” he said. “I am leaving London. But I did not want to leave before coming to you and telling you personally what had happened. You put your trust in me, my lord, and I have failed you. I have never failed at anything in my life, so this is something of a new experience for me. I have no defense other than to say what happened was unexpected and unintended, and the truth is that I did my best to keep my feelings separated from my duties. But it was… difficult.”
“It was impossible.”
“Indeed,” Cullen agreed quietly. “I am sure you no longer wish to have my fealty and I do not blame you. I am not worthy. But with Lady Barklestone dead, I cannot remain.”
William looked at him sharply. “Lady Barklestone is dead?”
Cullen nodded, feeling a lump in his throat and struggling against it. “When the guards were taking her to the vault, she fought them and ended up tumbling down the stairs. The fall killed her.”
William’s eyebrows lifted. “De Lara did not tell me that.”
“It is possible he did not know.”
“Who told you?”
“Banbury. He saw the body.”
William’s eyes narrowed. “The same man who is loyal to John?”
“Aye, my lord.”
William thought on that. “Then I suppose he has access to information that you would not,” he said. “He was certain?�
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“He swore upon his oath to me that he saw her body. I did not ask more than that.”
William thought that was a rather tragic downturn in all of this. Not only did Cullen shatter his career for a woman, but there was no hope that the love affair he’d risked everything for would continue.
As he looked at Cullen, he caught the expression on the man’s face and he could see the grief, telling him just how badly the young knight was hurting. Now that the shock of the news had worn off, he gestured to the nearest chair.
“Sit down, Cullen,” he ordered softly. “You and I must have a serious conversation.”
Cullen did as he was told, planting his big body into a cushioned chair. He faced William without fear. “Say what you must, my lord. I deserve all of it.”
William eyed him a moment before shaking his head. “God knows, you do,” he said. “You are a knight, sworn into the service of the king, and you were right when you say that you failed. You failed miserably, which was not something I expected of you. However, you are not the first who has failed based on feelings for a woman. A few years ago, I had a knight in my service who was supposed to infiltrate the de la Rosa family.”
“Of Framlingham Castle?”
William nodded. “The same,” he said. “They are rabid loyalists to John who, at the time, was still a prince. His brother, Richard, was in power, and the de la Rosas were people that bore watching. However, Garren le Mon fell in love with the only de la Rosa daughter, and that was something I never expected from him, either. He, too, failed me for love.”
Cullen didn’t know if he felt better or worse about that. “What became of le Mon?”
William lifted his eyebrows in resignation. “He married the woman and took her to France to escape her angry family,” he said. “He is still there, serving at Beaucaire Castle. He thinks I do not know this, but I do. I keep track of the men who have served me. The last I heard, he and the de la Rosa daughter had several children together.”
Cullen looked away, thinking that he would never know the same future with the woman he loved and it cut him to the bone.
Noble Line of de Nerra Complete Set: A Medieval Romance Bundle Page 20