by Land, Alexa
He grabbed me in an embrace, and I held on to him and sobbed into his shoulder as he told me, “I’d never do that, son. Never. You’re my family for life, and nothing will ever change that.” I whispered another apology, and he rubbed my back and said, “You have nothing to apologize for. I wish you’d told me all of this sooner, but I’m grateful that you finally confided in me.”
I leaned back so I could search his dark eyes as I asked, “Is this really okay? Am I still welcome here?”
“Of course, Beck. This is your home. Actually, it’s a lot more than that, too. You’d own the place if you’d met with my lawyer to sign those papers the other day.”
I stammered, “You’d planned to give me controlling interest?”
“I still do. Dante owns forty percent of it, so I plan to give you forty-one percent. The only reason the ranch is still in business is because of you. I didn’t even know you’d been putting your own money into it, and we’re going to talk about that later.”
“I thought you were giving me five percent or something.”
Ren asked, “Why’d you turn down my offer, Beck? Does it have something to do with what you just told me?”
I ran the back of my hand over my cheeks to dry them as I nodded. “I couldn’t accept such a generous gift while keeping a big secret from you. It just wasn’t right.”
“Well, now that everything is out in the open, will you let me reschedule the appointment with the lawyer and get those papers signed?”
“You just found out I was a liar and a prostitute. Why on earth would you trust me with the ranch?”
“You had your reasons for not telling me,” he said. “Given your history, it’s no wonder you expected rejection. But from this point out, no more secrets, okay?”
“Never again. I promise.”
“So, while we’re getting everything out in the open, I need to ask you about Lee,” he said. “Are you absolutely positive you can trust him? I liked him from the start, but I have to be honest. When he pulled that gun on Dante while I was standing right next to him, it scared the shit out of me.”
“You have to know how hard it is for me to trust people, Uncle Ren. So, when I say he’s a good man who truly loves me and I trust him with my life, you understand better than anyone what a huge statement that is.”
“Okay. I had to ask.”
I grinned a little and said, “I know. Thank you for the whole Papa Bear thing. It’s actually kind of nice.”
Ren grinned, too. As a few raindrops started to fall, we both turned and started to walk back toward the ranch. After a few moments, he asked, “Does Lee know you were a prostitute?”
“Please don’t hold this against him, but for the last year, he was my client. My only one, actually. We’d spend one weekend a month together in L.A., and for that he’d pay me an absurd amount. I used that money to cover shortfalls in payroll, along with a few extras.”
Ren murmured, “That’s how you were able to afford health insurance for the staff.”
“Yeah, among other things. Please don’t get mad at our bookkeeper for keeping this from you, because he had no idea. I told Elijah we had an investment account, and I was transferring money over every month. He might have had some suspicions about that, but he was too polite to question me.”
“I’m so sorry, Beck.”
I asked, “Why are you apologizing?”
“Because I was in so much denial about the state of this business that I never looked at the books or asked any questions, which put all the pressure on your shoulders. If I’d known we couldn’t even cover payroll, I would have sold everything I had to help keep us afloat.”
“There was no need, because I was handling it, and it wasn’t a sacrifice,” I told him. “I know earning money as a sex worker is both illegal and frowned upon by pretty much everyone, but it really wasn’t a bad job. And then I met Lee, and it became fantastic.”
“Was it a tough transition? Going from thinking of him as a client to something more, I mean?”
“Not at all. He was always more than a client. And it was actually a good way to sort of ease into becoming a couple, since we both started off with a boatload of trust issues. We were able to spend the last year building a solid foundation, without the pressure of actually calling it a relationship.”
Ren thought about that before saying, “That makes sense. It’s definitely an unconventional way to start a relationship, but who am I to question it? I spent a year falling in love with my best friend, who happens to be twenty years younger than me.”
The rain picked up a bit, so I said, “Should we run for cover?”
“Nah. I’d prefer to take my time.”
I glanced at Ren as we continued at our leisurely pace, and after a moment I asked, “Is everything really okay? I dreaded telling you the truth for such a long time, and it’s hard to believe it went that smoothly.”
“Honestly? I’m disappointed. In myself, I mean, not in you. I wish I’d had the sense to set up a trust fund for you when you were in your teens, so you never had to worry about money. I also wish I hadn’t dumped all the responsibility for this place into your lap. It wasn’t fair to make you deal with all that financial pressure on your own.”
“You know, most people do just fine without trust funds and don’t end up making the choices I did,” I told him. “And please don’t feel bad for distancing yourself from the ranch’s financial situation. You were really struggling after your last relationship ended, so you took the time you needed to make yourself whole again. That’s nothing to be ashamed of.”
“You’re much more understanding than I deserve.”
I said, “I feel like that should be my line.”
When we reached the courtyard, Ren turned to me and asked, “So, now that there are no more secrets between us, are you ready to let me reschedule the lawyer and make you co-owner of this place?”
I thought about that for a few moments before saying, “Alright. Forty-one percent is too much, though. I’d be happy with five percent.”
“That’s because you undervalue yourself. You deserve the biggest piece of the pie.”
“But that’s way too big.”
Ren said, “No it isn’t. I want you to have controlling interest.”
Lee joined us with one of the big umbrellas we kept in the lobby for guests and held it over the three of us as he asked, “Why don’t you two come inside? You’re getting soaked.”
I grinned and said, “We’re locked in a stalemate. My uncle wants to give me forty-one percent of the ranch so I edge out Dante’s forty percent stake, and I’m trying to make the case for five percent.”
Lee said, “Why don’t you hammer out the details in front of a nice, warm fireplace?”
“My uncle is really stubborn, so I think he needs the added incentive of potentially drowning out here to see things my way,” I joked.
I flashed Ren a big smile, and he chuckled and exclaimed, “Look who’s talking about being stubborn!”
“Keep your investment, Uncle Ren. You and Colt are just starting out as a couple, so think of your future. What if you two have kids someday? You’ll want them to inherit the ranch.”
Ren put his hand on my shoulder and said, “Colt and I already talked about having kids. He doesn’t really want any and felt guilty because he assumed I would. I told him I’d already raised a son, so I was perfectly content and didn’t feel the need to do it all over again. And right now, you know what I’m doing? Trying to give my son his inheritance, but he’s being stubborn and arguing with me.”
I grabbed my uncle in a bear hug and whispered, “Is that really how you feel about me?”
“Of course. I didn’t start calling you ‘son’ because I like making myself feel ancient. It’s because that’s what you are to me, Beck.”
A half-laugh, half-sob slipped from me, and I said, “I’m so lucky to be a part of this family. I don’t mean the Medinas, because frankly, they’re all pretty horrible aside
from you. I mean this family.” I gestured at the three of us, then at the nosy, wonderful collection of individuals who’d lined up at the dining room window so they could watch what we were doing. “Come on, let’s go inside and see if we can reach an agreement about this whole inheritance thing.”
Once we were indoors, Lee and Ren went to get us some coffee. Meanwhile, I headed for the nearest stash of towels. I’d left a rolling cart of clean laundry in the office behind the reception desk last Friday. It felt like a million years ago.
Dante was in the office with his feet on the desk, and he ended a call as I came in. “Hey,” I said. “I hope I’m not interrupting. I’ll be out of your way in a minute.”
“It’s fine, I’m finished in here,” he said as he got up. “I was talking to the head of the McGrath organization. He apologized for siding with Harris and promised it’d never happen again.”
“Do you believe him?”
“He’s not dumb enough to lie to me.”
I grabbed two towels and a pair of bathrobes from the clean laundry, and then I turned to Dante and said, “Can I ask you a question?”
“That’s the oddest thing people say on a regular basis, since you did in fact just ask me a question.” I frowned at him, and he tried and failed to look contrite. “Sorry. What did you want to know?”
“Why were you carrying a gun when Lee and I ran into you in the courtyard? Is that a regular thing with you?”
“There have been times in my life when I carried a gun every single day, because there were ongoing threats to my family. Then everything seemed to calm down, so I’d stopped doing that the last couple of years. But this past weekend, I got word of some sort of trouble brewing in Los Angeles. Since the McGraths were a part of it and I had a working relationship with them, I thought it best to arm myself before traveling through southern California on my way here. Little did I know the trouble would show up at the ranch.”
As I rubbed my dripping hair with one of the towels, I said, “That must be a tough way to live, always looking over your shoulder and expecting the worst.”
“I guess I’m used to it,” he said, as he brushed an invisible speck of lint from his dark gray suit jacket. “It won’t be like that for you, though. Lee seemed sincere about leaving this life behind when I was talking to him this morning, and now that the situation with Harris is resolved, there should be nothing for you two to worry about.”
“Hopefully, you’re right. I can’t help but wonder, though, about what’s next for him. He’s been doing the same thing for twenty years, since he was a fourteen-year-old kid. My life is here at the ranch, no question, but what’s he supposed to do on Catalina? He probably won’t have to worry about earning a living with his real estate investments, but I guess I’m worried that this is going to seem dull to him.”
He said, “It won’t, because he has you, and nothing else matters to him. In case you hadn’t noticed, that man adores you. Do you know how tough it was for an alpha male like Leonidas Speros to swallow his pride, come to me, and ask for help? But he did it, because you’re the center of his universe.”
“Thank you for agreeing to help him, even after he pulled a gun on you. Most people would probably find that unforgiveable.”
“My perspective is a lot different than the average person’s. Sure, I was pissed off at first, but I understand better than anyone the need to protect yourself and the man you love, and that’s all he was doing. How was he to know I wasn’t here to start trouble?”
We left the office, and I said, “On an entirely different note, Ren and I are currently debating how big a share of the ranch I should have. Obviously, you have a say in this, too. I think it should be five percent, which is pretty far off from his number, which is forty-one percent.”
“Believe in yourself and take the majority share, Beck. Ren and I both think you’re the man not only to run this place, but to turn it into a success.”
I said, “Thanks for the vote of confidence,” as we joined our friends in the seating area in front of the fireplace. They were grilling Will about the celebrities he’d worked with, and he seemed to be loving the attention.
I handed a robe and towel to Ren and used the other robe as a blanket when I curled up beside my boyfriend. A moment later, Clementine swooped in and landed on Lee’s shoulder, which made him yelp with surprise. Everyone had a good laugh at that, even Lee. Then Elijah tilted his head and studied me as he said, “You know what? I don’t think I’ve ever seen you without a hat before today.”
Lee forgot about the bird on his shoulder and leapt to my defense with, “I’m not sure Beck wants to talk about that.”
“No, it’s alright. The hats were meant to hide a big, ugly scar, right here.” I touched the spot gingerly before saying, “When I was twenty-one, my boyfriend at the time smashed my head through a window. I didn’t think I could make myself talk about what had happened to me, so I covered up the scar to keep people from asking questions. But it’s time to let go of the past and channel my energy into moving forward. For the record, I’ll probably still wear hats pretty frequently, because I’ve built up an awesome collection. But next time I put one on, it’ll be because I want to, not because I feel I have to.”
Elijah said, “I’m so sorry about what happened.”
And Vee murmured, “No wonder you stopped dating for a few years, after going through something like that.”
“There were several reasons I didn’t date. That was one of them,” I said. “There’s also the fact that the ranch kept me very busy. Plus, most men would have had a problem with the fact that I was a prostitute. That’s what I was doing the one weekend a month I spent in L.A. I’m now retired.” I glanced around at my friends. Most of them seemed surprised, and Will looked sympathetic.
I pushed ahead with, “I’m sorry I didn’t tell you sooner. I should have, and it wasn’t fair of me to keep something that big from you. But from now on, I’m always going to be honest with you guys, because you’re my family, and you deserve the truth.” It was dead silent in the lobby, and after a moment I blurted, “Will somebody please say something?”
Lorenzo was the first to speak up. “It’s nothing to be ashamed of, Beck. I um…I can actually relate in some ways.”
I asked, “What do you mean?”
“I’ve always told everyone I worked my way through college and my veterinary program as a model. That was basically true. I just left off the fact that I wasn’t wearing any clothes at the time. We’re not talking art school figure drawing here. The types of films I appeared in and the magazines that published my pictures were best enjoyed one-handed.”
He flashed me a self-conscious smile, and I told him, “That’s actually awesome. I never knew we had a porn star in the family.”
Odette chimed in next. “Your body, your choice, hun. Don’t ever let anyone make you feel bad about any of that.”
“I wish you hadn’t felt you needed to keep that from us, Beck. We’d never judge you,” Vee said. “Not for that, anyway. Maybe if you committed a crime against humanity, like wearing black socks with sandals. But certainly not for being a sex worker.”
Cassidy, who usually took everything in without comment, said, “Vee’s right, we’d never judge you. It must have been tough to admit that to everyone all at once, so I just want to tell you I think you’re brave.”
“Thank you.” I glanced around the room and didn’t see any looks of condemnation, but I really wasn’t going to go person to person and question whether they really were okay with it. Instead, I got up and said, “I’ve let my coffee go cold, so I’m going to grab a warm-up. Actually, I’ll bring the pot, in case anyone else wants more, too.”
Lee got up, which made the parakeet fly to someone else, and accompanied me into the dining room. Then he kissed me and said, “That took a lot of guts, and I’m proud of you.”
“I told Ren the truth when we were outside. It was important that he found out first. Since he took it so well, I
thought I’d roll with that momentum and tell everyone else. It’s a relief to finally have it out in the open.”
“They seemed to take it well.”
“I couldn’t quite read everyone’s reaction,” I said. “It’s possible one or two of them had a problem with it, but that’s not something I can control. I did what needed to be done, which was just to be honest.”
A few minutes later, we returned to the lobby with a rolling cart, which we’d loaded up with the muffins that had survived breakfast, the commercial coffeemaker, mugs, and everything needed to doctor up the coffee however anyone saw fit. Isaac loaded some muffins onto a plate and asked, “What should I be working on today?”
“You’ve been putting in long hours, so take the day off,” I said. “We’ve finished our spring cleaning, and everything’s ready for Dante and Vincent’s family. It’ll be hectic while they’re here, so let’s just enjoy a bit of downtime while we can.”
Isaac said, “Works for me,” before taking the plate to Ezra.
“That goes for everyone,” I called. “Take the day off, because we’ll need all hands on deck starting Friday.”
Maybe because of the rain, or just because we all enjoyed each other’s company, everyone remained in the lobby even after being given the day off. Dante and Vincent convinced Lee, Tracy, Gabriel, and Odette to join them for a poker tournament, while some others found a stack of board games and started debating about which one to play. Meanwhile, Elijah and his husband both pulled paperbacks from their back pockets and curled up together on one of the couches.
I decided to find some snacks for everyone, and Will fell into step with me as I went to the kitchen. “I think my cat’s in love with your uncle’s dog,” he said. “They’re curled up together in front of the fireplace. What’s his name, BJ?”
“Sadly no. It’s CJ.”
“She’s never even seen a dog before. I guess no one told her they’re supposed to be enemies.”
As I opened the huge, commercial refrigerator and searched the shelves, I said, “I’m glad your cat is feeling right at home here. How about you, Will?”