by Raquel Belle
“Hey, you okay in there? You’ve been in there a while.”
The strange voice snaps me back to my senses and I push Nick away. “Uh, sorry. Be right out!”
He pulls away with a satisfied grin, making me roll my eyes as I hop to my feet and straighten my top.
“You might as well stop pretending you want to end things between us after this.”
Smoothing my hair, I glower at him over my shoulder and open the door. To my dismay, there’s a short line outside the ladies’ room when I step out with Nick. My entire body is about to go up in flames from sheer embarrassment. Of course, they think we were in there about to get down and dirty—well, we would have if no one had knocked. Several women watch with interest and a few with silly grins as they eye Nick with appreciation. Stifling a groan, I hold my head high and march on. Nick catches up to me, seemingly unbothered by our embarrassing situation.
“Slow down,” he says as we step into the bar. “Where is it going to be? Your place or mine?”
I see Sean staring in our direction with a raised brow and I quickly step away from Nick. “Neither,” I hiss. My walk of shame seems to have been the perfect antidote to Nick’s bravado, I come to my senses and get my raging hormones under control. “I’m going home. Alone.” I walk off without a second glance, and I can feel Nick’s eyes boring into my back.
Chapter Twenty-Six
Grace
Swooping down onto the couch dramatically, I let the breath out of my lungs with a loud whoosh.
“Grace, you’ll crush your dress,” Cara warns.
“I don’t care about the stupid dress,” I whine. I’ve been whining a lot lately.
“Yeah right,” she snorts.
With a pout, I lift my head and gaze down the length of my body. “Okay, maybe I do care about the dress. It’s gorgeous.” It’s a violet satin, off-shoulder creation with a lace bodice. The elegant gown has been in the back of my closet for almost a year just waiting for an occasion to be worn. I decided to wear it to the charity event tonight rather than shop for something new.
“It is,” Cara murmurs, holding up two pairs of heels and examining each one with her brows scrunched in concentration. “I say go with the silver heels rather than the purple.”
“Yeah, I agree.”
She nods and brings them to me. Hauling myself upright, I slip the heels on with another sigh.
“You’ve been sighing and moaning and moping since I got here. Stop being so dramatic.”
Cara arrived about an hour ago to check on me—she’s thoughtful like that. She’s also been listening to my incessant whining, but in my opinion, I have every right to be dramatic. I feel like I’m losing my mind. “You don’t understand, Cara. Going to this event on Nick’s arm is going to be more awkward than ever. You should see us at work. We practically hot-foot around each other. Having to walk on eggshells around him is so tiring. But I can’t back out of going now. And this event is for a good cause.”
Things were all good and well when I was attending events with Nick as his assistant and friend. Now I’m his ex-lover as well. The complicated nature of our relationship stresses me out more and more every day.
Flopping down beside me, Cara folds her arms. “Of course things between you two will be awkward for a bit but I’m sure you’ll get back to normal…just like the last time. I mean, you slept together four years ago and it didn’t take that long for things to go back to normal. You were the best of friends again right after.”
“Hearing someone else say it—it really hits me how weird my relationship with my boss is.”
Turning to me with a quirked brow, Cara laughs. “What’s weird is that it’s just hitting you. It hit everyone else a long time ago.”
Glowering at my nails—which are adorned with polish that matches my dress—I fight the urge to nibble on them. I can’t show up to an event littered with rich folks and have chipped nail polish. “Things are so different now...so much harder. I knew having a sexual relationship would ruin us.”
“From the outside, things seem the way they’ve always been, but I can imagine how strained things are between you two. Do you really think things have been ruined though?”
“We argued in the ladies’ room of O’Sullivan’s and almost had sex on the counter,” I deadpan, wanting to laugh at Cara’s stunned expression. “We’ve turned into different people I tell you, and it’s because we gave in to our sexual attraction. We’ve been ruined.”
“Wait...what?”
“Things aren’t just strained—they’re downright crazy. We’re driving each other nuts.”
“I’m still stuck on the arguing and almost having sex in a public bathroom part. When did that happen?”
“Three days ago,” I shrug.
“And you’re just now telling me about it?”
“It slipped my mind.”
“I don’t get how something like that slips your mind, but okay.”
“Like I said, things have been crazy. My mind is all over the place sometimes.”
I glance over at Cara and I’m in disbelief when I see her grinning from ear to ear. “Oh, does my misery amuse you?”
She snickers. “You know it doesn’t. It’s just that you and Nick are like a live soap opera and each episode is juicier than the last. It’s always something with you two.”
“I can’t wait until you fall in love and enter a soap opera of your own. I’m going to be grinning with absolute glee, just like you are now.”
She throws her head back and bellows so loudly, it echoes in my apartment. “Where am I going to find a man to fall in love with and have drama of my own, Grace? I practically live in my office.”
I shrug. “It’ll happen. You’re gorgeous and successful—there’s a man out there worthy of you, I know it.”
“Yeah, well, you go ahead and keep hope alive if you want, I’ll just stick to reality. Your feelings for Nick run deep.”
“Very,” I sigh.
“I’ve never had that. I’m not sure I ever will. My little sister is getting married before me for goodness sake.”
I glance her way again to see her fiddling with the silver necklace that she never takes off. Her sister has one just like it. I can tell she’s thinking about her sister now. “Are you okay?”
“Of course. I mean, I’m so happy for her. I’m ecstatic, but sometimes I wish I’d find someone…just like you’ve found Nick…and like my baby sister has found her special someone.”
“Uh...I don’t think you can put my situation with Nick in the same category as your sister. You and I are in the same boat sister, because as far as I can see, there’s no future for me with Nick―not the future I want anyway.”
We both fall silent for a while, Cara still rubbing her necklace between her fingers and me staring at the antique brass clock hanging above my door. I have ten more minutes before the car arrives. For once, I haven’t walked over to Nick’s place to wait on our car. I just couldn’t bear going over there to have intimate moments chatting while I help him select a jacket or shoes or fix his tie. We are not a couple and it’s time we stopped behaving like we are.
“I’ve tried,” Cara says softly, breaking the silence. “You and Jazz and Beth are my witnesses. I’ve tried to find love.”
“I know.”
Lifting a shoulder, she breathes, “Oh, well. I guess it doesn’t happen for everyone.”
Before I can reprimand her for the hopelessness I detect behind her words, she jumps up. “It is what it is. Time to be practical and move on with life.”
“You sound like Nick,” I grumble, glowering at her.
“Speaking of Nick. He’ll be here soon. Come on, let’s finish getting you ready. You can’t wear your hair down, not with that dress.”
I’m usually the one excited about getting dressed up and choosing what shoes and accessories to wear or how to do my hair, but not tonight. “Honestly, I don’t care this time.”
“Grace Peterson, snap out of it.
You’re Nick’s assistant, you have to represent.”
“You’re right, Cara, I’m his assistant. I don’t need to be on his arm for every goddamn event. It’s always like we’re going on a fucking date, and we’ve never dated.”
She gasps, her wide eyes swinging to my face. I don’t make it a habit of cursing or losing my temper. I’m at my wit’s end right now. “Clearly the gang needs to get together soon because somebody needs to unwind.”
Releasing a breath, I get up. “Yeah, that would be nice. I do need to blow off steam. Alright, I’ll let you do whatever you want with my hair. We don’t have much time.”
***
The ballroom is quiet—with the exception of Nick’s smooth voice filling the room. I gaze at him with what I know is open adoration, but I can’t help it. No matter how upset I am with him―about our situation―it’s hard not to have an overwhelming feeling of respect for him. His speech involves snippets of his time growing up in a children’s home and how he met a few good Samaritans who encouraged him to claw his way to the top. Maybe no one else detects the slight pain underlying his words—he tries to hide it—but I can.
Glancing at Sean, I see him rocking back and forth on his heels with his hands shoved into his pockets. For once his expression is somber and he looks more like his brother now than ever. Clearly, they’re both uncomfortable with memories of their childhood. Nick just hides it better. His speech ends with why he decided to contribute so much to the Children’s Hope Foundation and why he’s encouraging everyone else to do the same.
My and Sean’s applause is probably the loudest in the massive room. The only thing left for us to do is to whistle and bring out foam fingers. I’d do it too—just for the laugh—if it wouldn’t embarrass the hell out of Nick. The thought brings a smile to my face.
“Don’t be selfish, Grace. You have to share the joke.” Sean’s eyes twinkle. “We agreed we’d keep each other entertained tonight.” He surveys the room. “Around all of these stuffy suits.”
“You’re one of these suits, mister wealthy cardiologist.”
“But I’m not stuffy. I’m loads of fun,” he wiggles his eyebrows and I snicker.
“I was just picturing you and me whistling and holding up you’re number one foam fingers after Nick’s speech. Can you imagine? In a place like this?”
His roar of laughter is heard above the applause and I can’t help joining him. “We’d probably be thrown out. Why didn’t you think of it before? I’d totally do it just to embarrass the hell out of my brother…and for the laugh of course.”
“That’s what I thought too—I’d do it for the laugh...not to embarrass Nick. You’re awful.”
“He needs a little embarrassment to loosen up a bit. Look at him, scowling at us.”
I follow his gaze to Nick, who’s shaking hands with the founder of the Children’s Hope Foundation. He’s only half-listening to the man because he’s glaring daggers at Sean and I. “Great,” I moan. “He’s looking at us like that because he has this ridiculous idea that you and I have some kind of romantic interest in each other.”
Sean’s eyes gleam with laughter. “I know. Why do you think I flirt with you when he’s around? Like I said, he needs a push in the right direction.”
Yeah, but I’m the one who always receives the lectures. “You are really something else, you know that? I’m going to go to the other side of the room far away from you before you get us into trouble.”
He holds a hand over his heart. “Awe come on, Grace don’t leave me alone.”
“Something tells me you won’t be alone for long.” I spotted a pretty blonde checking Sean out the minute we stepped in. As I back away from him, I see her face lighting up with interest. “See ya,” I sing, whirling around to bounce off in the opposite direction.
I smile at Mike Porter, he came to support Nick and donate a hefty check. He’s always been fond of Nick—all the partners are.
“Ms. Peterson, good to see you tonight.”
“Great to see you too, Mr. Porter.” He seems to be enjoying his retirement. I think he’s even gained a few pounds in the short time since he’s left the firm. I also chat up a few familiar faces just to be polite. I’ve always known how to work a room and I’ve honed my skills since Nick changed direction and went corporate. The numerous events we’ve been to have made me quite the expert. If it comes down to it, I can host any party or event with my eyes closed.
I keep moving because I see Nick weaving through the crowd. It’s taking him a while to reach me because every step he takes, someone stops him to shoot the breeze. Every now and then he sends me a pointed look and I pretend not to notice and move further away. My feet are killing me now because I’ve been flitting about like a butterfly. Trying to keep my distance from Nick is so exhausting. Usually, I’d be at his side moving around the room and chatting people up with him, but I’m determined to do what I set out to do—not need his company so much. Finding a spot by the door that leads to the balcony, I let out a breath. The area is secluded enough. Nick was busy talking to someone when I found my hideout so he has no idea where I turned. I can see him though, his eyes searching the room in an effort to locate me.
A waitress passes by with a tray and I grab a glass of red wine to sip while I keep track of him. Watching Nick soon begins to irritate me though, because more than a few socialites and bored housewives of rich businessmen are vying for his attention. Their giggles and eyelash batting make me sick—which is so hypocritical because I’m sure I’ve done my fair share of lash batting and giggling around him too. Just looking at his chiseled, handsome face will make even the most sophisticated of women titter like a schoolgirl.
Jealousy eats me up inside when I watch him entertain the women throwing themselves at him. I’m sure he’s just being polite but bearing witness to it makes me miserable. I’m about to abandon my spot when I see Betty Orville in the direction I was going to head. Of course, she’d be here. If Betty and I cross paths and she tries to insult me—as is her way—my claws will definitely come out. My emotions are running high tonight. I stop paying attention to Nick and get lost in observing everyone else, so I don’t even realize that Nick has spotted me until he’s right beside me.
“It’s hard for you to hide in that dress,” comes a hum of words that make me jump.
Clutching my chest, I swing to Nick with a scowl, ignoring what I know is supposed to be a compliment. “I wasn’t hiding.”
“Yes you were...from me.” Before I open my mouth to deny it he adds, “Don’t deny it. You’ve been doing everything in your power to avoid me all night. You barely said two words to me in the car on our way here.”
Snapping my mouth shut, I lift my glass to my lips and take a long sip, choosing to ignore all of that too. It’s all true, but I’m in no mood to address any of it. “So, are you having fun?”
His lips twist sardonically. “Hardly. I wouldn’t have minded just writing a hefty check and staying home.”
“Your speech was great. Inspiring.” I give him a subtle once over. He looks incredible in his tux and my fingers practically itch because I’m not touching him.
“I’m surprised you heard any of it. You and Sean seemed pretty distracted,” his tone drops, “with each other.”
It takes everything in me not to roll my eyes at his persistent jealousy over my relationship with Sean. “I heard every word of your speech.” I nearly add that he always commands my full attention even when I’m pissed at him, but manage to hold my tongue while I turn away.
His long sigh has me swinging back to him. “You’ve completely shut me out. I never thought I’d see the day.”
“What are you talking about?”
“Dance with me and I’ll tell you.”
My mouth actually falls open. “You want to dance? You don’t dance.” I check out the hardwood surface in the middle of the room. No one else has started dancing yet. The wine and champagne have to flow a bit more for everyone to loosen up and get out
there.
“I don’t but you like fun and spontaneity. This is me making an effort to be just that…while extending an olive branch in the process.”
“We’re not in the middle of a war, Nick. There’s no need for an olive branch.”
“It feels like we are. You won’t even talk to me.”
“That’s so not true. We work together, we have to talk.”
“We have to? That’s never been the case before. You don’t talk to me or look at me like you used to. Just dance with me, Grace.”
It comes out as a command but I hear a please somewhere in his tone. “Okay.” Reluctantly, I place my hand in his. It’s not that I don’t want to dance with him. Any other time I’d be ecstatic because I love it when he breaks out of that somber shell he insists on wearing. But I know that the second I’m in his arms, staring into his eyes, my resolve is going to crumble. As he leads me to the middle of the room, we capture a few curious glances and smiles. I guess the dance floor will be filled soon since the ice has been broken.
Just as I expected, when Nick pulls me close, my will to keep the emotional barrier that I’ve erected between us diminishes. Letting out a quiet sigh of resignation, I accept the inevitable. “You don’t have to change, you know. I happen to like you the way you are—the serious, intense, non-dancer.”
His soft chuckle makes my inner muscles clench. “That’s a relief because I don’t think I can do this too often.”
“Uncomfortable?”
“Not as much I as I thought I’d be. I’m sure it’s because I’m dancing with you.”
God damn it. He’s going to charm his way right back between my legs. I can already feel my underwear slipping. Suppressing a groan, I rest my forehead on his chest. Maybe if I don’t look at him I can fight my body’s needy reaction. It doesn’t work since my body is still pressed against his as we dance.