by Hélène Soper
Luc held out his hand when she plucked her keys from her clutch. Avery looked up at him, her eyebrows pinched together in puzzlement. He looked at her keys and nodded to his hand. Her mouth formed an “oh” as she realized his intent, and handed him the set of keys with the appropriate one singled out. He slid the key into the lock, opened the door, and with a gallant sweep of his hand, motioned her to enter. Avery crossed the threshold of her home with her head held high and her shoulders back. Luc was proud he made her feel worthy of being treated like the queen she was. He hoped like hell the next man in her life had the balls to worship her properly.
Luc’s chest tightened at the thought of another man touching Avery, tasting her, adoring her. Hell, the sight of Gryff’s hand on her back at the gala made his fists tighten. Jealousy was foreign to Luc, and he didn’t know what to make of the reactions this woman incited in his body.
Avery tilted her face up to him, confusion assuaging the heat he’d seen earlier in her eyes.
“Thank you. For taking me home, for…everything. You sure know how to get a girl hot and bothered, don’t you, Mr. Christianson?”
“Oh, Ms. Lewis, you have no idea.”
His aching cock throbbed, begging to push inside her wet heat.
The fire in her eyes returned and scorched each spot of bare skin her eyes grazed. With the tips of her fingers she traced his pecs through his shirt, down his chest, over his taut stomach to the zipper on his tuxedo pants. He could only imagine how velvety soft her tongue would feel enveloping his rigid cock. But, that was where the image would stay, in his imagination. A groan escaped his throat.
Luc lifted her wandering hand to his lips and placed a soft kiss in her palm. “As much as it kills me to say this…another time, beautiful girl. You can hold me to that.”
The words were out of his mouth before his brain could stop them. He had no business promising anything in the future.
“Mmmm, indeed I will hold you to that.”
Channeling the ingenue he remembered from school, her lashes framed her gaze. But Luc suspected that if he could peel back a layer or two of the innocent vibe she had going on he may find himself a seductress waiting to be awoken.
“OK, you’re officially killing me.” Luc clutched his chest in mock pain. “At this moment, I find myself regretting I need to be up before dawn tomorrow and out of town for a few days meeting customers. I look forward to resuming this…conversation.”
He swallowed back his ravenous appetite to taste her again and shoved his hands in his pockets. The temptation to pull the pins out of her hair, twist the blonde tresses in his fist and haul her down to her knees was excruciating.
“Time will fly. You’ll be so busy you won’t be able to think about anything besides your new job. If you have time when you get back, you know where to find me. And don’t forget our interview next week.”
“Indeed, I do know how to find you, Ms. Lewis. But, if you think you won’t be in my head the entire time then I need to show you just how wrong you’d be.”
He took Avery’s face with both hands and laid a gentle kiss on her forehead, behind her ear, on the slope of her neck. He wanted to leave her with the impression he was a good guy, not some jerk who only wanted to get in her pants. Well, he was both those guys.
He needed distance. Time to put his head back on straight. He couldn’t offer this incredible woman what she deserved. That part of him had died in a fiery crash five years ago, and he’d been sleepwalking through his life ever since. All he was good for was a pick-up scene with an experienced sub. Avery needed more.
This incredible woman stirred something unrecognizable deep in his chest. Would there ever be a time when he could live again? Would he ever be whole enough to be the man Avery needed? Would he ever be able to let another woman hold his heart?
Guilt engulfed his system, weighing him down, killing any thoughts of a future where happiness thrived. Would there ever be a time where every cell in his body no longer ached with their loss? He dropped his hands from her face and slid his tux jacket off her shoulders.
“Good night, Avery.”
“Safe travels, Luc. See you next week.”
The statement sounded more like a question and the look of rejection in her eyes left him feeling like an asshole. He knew he was giving off mixed signals, but his feelings were twisting in his chest like a tornado spitting out random shit without care for who it hit or the potential damage inflicted. He quickly opened the front door and stepped into the cool night.
As he settled into the driver’s seat, Avery’s scent enveloped him like a cozy blanket. The short time she wore his jacket was enough to embed the material with her essence. He brought the collar to his nose and took a deep inhale. Calm infused his bones. That could only mean trouble.
5
Morning light didn’t reveal any understanding for the roller coaster of emotions Luc had unleashed upon her last night. One moment he’d been completely and utterly focused on her pleasure, seemingly unable to slake his desire for her, and the next he barely spoke when he drove her home, as if he regretted rocking her world down that darkened hallway.
She could still smell his cologne-scented musk, hear the dirty words roll off his tongue, feel his strong hands caress her skin. He played her body the way he used to play his guitar — aggressively, sensuously, effortlessly. He made her feel like a goddess and extracted sensations that were the stuff of sexy fantasies, never imagining they could be produced in her body. Her nipples ached for his touch. The steel rod in his pants was a dead giveaway she did something for him too. So why wouldn’t he let her relieve some of that pressure?
Luc’s deep, authoritative voice had Avery’s inner sub clawing to escape the sealed tomb where it had been banished years ago. She hadn’t questioned whether or not she would obey Luc’s commands last night. It was both freeing and frightening. She knew down to her bones Luc wouldn’t hurt her. Yet, when he had pinned her arms behind her back, her flight or fight response kicked in thanks to ugly memories that wouldn’t go the hell away.
It didn’t matter. Between raising her daughter on her own and taking the city editor role at the local daily newspaper, Avery’s plate was full. They would meet next week for their interview and that would be it. Besides, Avery wasn’t ready to be anyone’s sub. Not even Luc’s.
Avery shook her head as if that would be enough to get that man out of her mind. She needed to focus on getting everyone out the door on time.
“Thanks for babysitting last night, Mom. Say, did you borrow Grandma Catharine’s silver bracelet and forget to return it?”
“Of course not,” Sheilagh Lewis responded, indignity lacing her voice.
“I wanted to wear it last night, but I couldn’t find it. I always keep it in the velvet box in my top drawer, but it wasn’t there.”
“You probably just misplaced it. If you had put it away properly last time you wore it, it would be where you left it.”
Frustration with her mom’s flippant response threatened to cause Avery’s neck muscles to pull her shoulders up to her ears. She refused to let her mother cause her to second guess herself. The bracelet was in its proper place last week. It couldn’t have walked away on its own. Avery attempted to diffuse the tension in her neck by tipping her head side to side for a lengthening stretch. Her usual morning yoga practice had gone out the window this morning, thanks to a sleepless night tossing and turning, trying to make sense of Luc’s confusing signals and how he coaxed a colossal orgasm from her body, so this was the best she was going to get.
“Mommy, Mommy, look what I found!” Cassie came running into the kitchen where Avery and her mom were cleaning up from breakfast.
“What’s that, monkey?” She caught a glimpse of the large manila envelope Cassie was waving in the air.
“Can Mommy take a look, please?”
She held out an unsteady hand to accept the envelope from her daughter, trying to keep her face as neutral as possible. She gingerly
took the letter from Cassidy’s hand, careful to only handle it by the corners, closed her eyes and took a deep breath before breaking the seal to peer inside.
Don’t you know it’s dangerous
to follow men down dark hallways?
“Where did this come from, Cassie?” Avery tried to control the tremor in her voice.
“By the front door, Mommy. It was on the floor.”
“OK. Thank you. It’s time to go up and brush your teeth and get dressed for school. Grandma will help you.” Sheilagh Lewis ushered her granddaughter upstairs.
Avery peered inside the envelope again to identify the other item she felt bunched at the bottom. She gasped when she recognized the scrap of lace — the thong Luc ripped off her the night before.
The doorbell chime made her jump. She opened the door to find Gryff standing on her front step, a familiar stoic look on his face that made her stomach churn.
“Good morning. We need to talk.” Gryff entered her foyer and closed the door behind him. “Has Cassie left for school yet?”
“No, she and my mom are upstairs. The bus will be here any minute. I was just about to call you.”
“OK. Let’s wait for Cassie to leave and then we can swap news.”
“Unca Gryff!” Cassie bounded down the stairs and into the big cop’s waiting arms. He lifted her so they were eye-to-eye and gave her a big raspberry on her cheek, causing peals of giggles to fill the room.
Avery called on her yogic breathing to calm her jitters. She couldn’t let Cassie see her hands shaking.
“OK, sweet pea, you need to get on your shoes. Here’s your school bag and lunch. Grandma will take you to the bus stop. Give me a hug and a kiss and off you go like a big girl. Have a great day. I love you.”
Cassie took her grandmother’s hand with a smile.
“Have a good day at work, Mommy. I love you too! Bye, Unca Gryff.”
Her baby girl’s sweet voice and beaming smile gave Avery a moment of joy. She thanked God every day for her precious angel.
The door had barely closed behind the pair when Gryff spun her toward the kitchen and urged her forward.
“Let’s go sit. I desperately need some coffee. Do you have a pot on the go?”
Avery nodded and headed to the coffee maker to pour fresh mugs for them both.
“Thank you.” Gryff placed his hand on Avery’s to keep the brew from spilling over the sides. “What has you so jittery?”
“Cassie found a letter.”
“What kind of letter?”
Gryff’s tone went from friendly-Uncle-Gryff to all-business-Detective-Calder in less than a heartbeat. God, she hated that voice. She closed her eyes and pinched the bridge of her nose as she tried to talk herself down from the edge of panic. Avery pointed to the envelope on the table.
“A threatening one. She found it on the floor by the front door.”
Gryff wasted no time shoving his hands into latex gloves. He was incredibly steady and precise as he removed the letter from the oversized business envelope.
“Shit. Sit down and tell me what happened and where these came from. Did you handle the envelope or the fabric?”
“Seriously? I know the drill. Cassie’s fingers were all over the outside, but as soon as I saw my name on the front, I was careful to touch only the corners and used a knife to open the flap. I didn’t take anything out of the envelope.”
Here we go again.
Thank God for Gryff. He had been such a good friend through the very worst time in her life, and now when she needed him again he didn’t flinch. He was at her side like always. She wished she didn’t need him in that way, that they could just be friends instead of cop and victim.
He took a moment to examine the letter. “Interesting use of newspaper stories and headlines. Somebody either knows what you do for a living or is in the newspaper business too.”
He held the letter so Avery could see it. “Any idea what this sketch in the corner is about?”
She shrugged her shoulders. “I’ve never seen it before. It looks like a dead flower of some kind. What’s the dripping liquid? It looks like…blood.”
A cold shiver racked her body.
He plucked the remnants of her underwear from the pouch and held it up with a finger.
“Is this what I think it is?”
Avery flushed at the sight of her friend, the badass detective, fingering her torn black lace thong. She shrugged her shoulders. “Yes?” Crimson brightened her cheeks.
“Care to explain, or do I even want to know?”
“They’re mine. From last night. Luc and I…um…he…in a hallway at the casino.”
“We’ll leave that topic of discussion for later.” Now he sounded like her big brother. “When do you think the envelope was left for you?”
“It wasn’t there last night when we left for the casino, clearly, because I was wearing those. Not sure if it was there when Luc brought me home or if it was dropped just before Cassie found it this morning.”
“Was the door locked when you got home?”
“Definitely, Luc unlocked it with my key. When we got inside we were…distracted and didn’t turn on the lights. If it was already there I didn’t notice it. We got back here about thirty minutes after we…left the panties.”
Gryff pulled out his phone to take pictures and make a few notes.
“Should I be worried, Gryff? It feels like Cal all over again. But he’s behind bars. Right?”
She didn’t like the look on her friend’s face. Dread felt like a boulder in her stomach. He took her hands in his, unabashed anger, determination, and sympathy all playing out in his eyes. She pulled away, banded her arms around her waist, and started to rock.
“No! Do not say it. He’s out, isn’t he? Please God, no, not that.”
Gryff nodded. “The call I took last night was from a buddy of mine on the Hamilton force. Cal was released two days ago. Last night he missed curfew at his halfway house.”
Avery gasped, and her hands flew to cover her mouth, shaking her head. “But he hasn’t finished his sentence yet. How could he have been released and I not have been told?”
The room started to spin, the rush of blood in her ears drowned out whatever Gryff was trying to tell her. Bloody hell. This couldn’t be happening. Not now, when she was starting to feel whole again. Someone was whispering in her ear and stroking her hair. It was soothing.
“Avery.” A familiar voice. Gryff. “You with me, sweetheart?”
His broad shoulders loomed over her, his handsome face pinched with worry as his gaze bored into her. She managed to nod to her friend as he pulled his chair closer to hers and sat in front of her.
“Listen, I know this is a shock. I was told last week he was going to be released. The conditions include that he can’t come within five hundred meters or have any contact with you or Cassie. Otherwise he’s right back inside for the remainder of his sentence.”
“Damn it, Gryff!” Avery slammed her hands on the table and jumped up from her chair to start doing laps back and forth in her small kitchen. “Our lives are just now becoming normal and bam, we’re right back where we were, looking behind every door, triple checking the locks, afraid of my own shadow. I refuse to raise my daughter in a constant state of fear.”
Capital A. It appeared every time she scrutinized herself in a mirror or saw herself in her mind’s eye. Not the classic scarlet letter everyone knew. That one would be much easier to get over, not that she condoned adultery. This A was a different shade of red. Blood red. Her blood. Her unborn child’s blood. Thank God it was never her daughter, Cassie’s, blood. That would have left her completely broken. The A seemed to pulse and glow with a life of its own, calling out to her, mocking the woman she fought so hard to become. This A stood for abuse survivor. It was how Avery identified herself, sharing top billing with being Cassie’s mom. It would always be who she was. And that pissed her off. She was thankful the physical scars had faded with time. But her shame wa
s still visible when she looked in the mirror. She was proud of what she had been able to accomplish in the past six years as a single mom, yet the crimson A still hung around her neck, weighing her down. Her life felt like quicksand — the more she struggled to rise above the mire, the faster it sucked her back down into the blackness.
Liquid welled in her eyes, and her voice cracked as anger gave way to anxiety then to sheer terror as memories of that dark time of her life flooded her brain. She pressed her fingers in circles on her temples as if trying to erase the images.
Gryff intercepted her path and hauled her into his solid chest.
“Nothing’s going to happen to you or Cassie. We already have extra patrols going past your house and Cassie’s school. I want to come by later to have a look around your yard and check on your security system. This is all just precautionary, though. I doubt that dickwad is stupid enough to violate the terms of his parole so soon after getting out.”
Avery snorted and pulled back, so she could look up at her friend. “Don’t be so sure. My idiot ex-husband has done a lot of pretty stupid things. I wouldn’t put anything past him. And this obviously is a message directed at me. Whoever sent it must have been following me. I had a weird feeling for a while last night, like eyes were following my every move. I dismissed it after I caught Luc staring at me. Maybe I was wrong?”
Her body shuddered, and she couldn’t help but scan the room and the locks on the windows. A cold chill came over her, like last night. But there was no one in her home but her and Gryff. Did she dare trust her instincts?
“Let’s focus on what we know and wait for the lab report on this note and fabric. In the meantime, go on about your day. Let us do our jobs. OK?”
“You make it sound easy. I wish my nerves would listen to you. I just can’t shake this feeling…I can’t even describe it. But it’s not good.”