by Amy Bright
"Andi, you can't. Please wait for that police officer to come back."
I felt as if I were talking a brick wall. I started to get up and realized I was attached to a million things. "Damn it," I said.
"Andi, please calm down. I’m sure the police are handling everything."
I felt helpless. There was honestly nothing I could do at that point. Anna was right, I needed to let the police do their jobs, but I was incredibly worried. I had no idea if Dawn was safe or not. I closed my eyes, just intending to rest them.
I must’ve drifted off to sleep, because it was dark when I opened them again. Sitting next to me holding my hand was Dawn. She was sleeping. She looked incredibly beautiful. I squeezed her hand, and her eyes fluttered open. "Hey," I said. Tears formed in her eyes, and she laid her head on my shoulder and started crying. I reached up and stroked her hair. "Shhh. It's alright. I’m fine, and we’re together now."
She cried for a few additional minutes, and finally looked up at me, "I'm so sorry. This is all my fault."
"No!" I said emphatically. "The only person to blame for this is Tess." She laid her head back down and sobbed.
A short time later the door opened. Sgt. Daniels came in. "Ms. Morris, Ms. Williams," she said, "I just wanted to come by and tell you the news in person. Ms. Allen is going to be charged with attempted murder, kidnapping, assault, and possession of a schedule I controlled substance. We do think you were drugged Ms. Williams. We found GHB in her possession. It looks like she might have had a psychotic break, since there is no previous history of any criminal activity."
I looked from Sgt. Daniels to Dawn, "Back up. Drugged? Kidnappin’?" I needed answers.
"I’ll leave you two to talk," Sgt. Daniels said, "I’ll be in touch." She left the room and I looked at Dawn.
Dawn took a deep breath and began telling me what had happened. When she was finished, I pulled her into the bed with me. At that moment, I needed to hold her.
Dawn
Andi was in the hospital for several more days. I refused to leave her side. Her assistant, Anna was there, as well. The day she was due to be released from the hospital we both got messages from Sgt. Daniels. She said Tess had been sent to a hospital in Columbia, the state capital, for a psychiatric evaluation. Anna was going back to Atlanta, and Andi was going to stay with me for a few days until she was cleared for travel.
I hadn't been back to the house since the police had rescued me. I was apprehensive. I didn't want to feel that way, but I did, nonetheless. We walked in the front door, and I could feel my heart speed up. Andi must’ve noticed something, because she put her arm around me. "It's alright," she said, "we don't have to stay here. We can stay at a hotel instead."
I shook my head, and said, "This is my home; I shouldn’t have to be afraid here." We continued walking through the house until we got to the bedroom. We crossed the threshold, and I started to panic.
Andi took my hand and led me back out to the living room. "Let's get a hotel room, darlin’," she said, "as you said, you shouldn’t have to feel this way." I gave her an incredulous look for twisting my words. Still, I gave it some thought and decided it might be better to not stay there right then.
She packed a bag for me, and I drove us to the Hilton. We settled into the room, and I finally felt somewhat peaceful. We stayed for three days. We spent our days lounging in the room, and our nights sleeping in each other’s arms.
On our last night at the hotel, Andi said the four most dreaded words in the English language, "We need to talk."
I looked at her, and said, "OK, what do we need to talk about?"
She must’ve saw the fear on my face, because she leaned in and kissed me before saying, "It's nothin’ bad. I’m simply concerned. I don't relish the thoughts of you goin’ back to your house alone."
"There isn't much choice, honey," I said. "You have to go back to work, and I can’t live in this hotel room."
"You’re right, I do have to return to work, but I was thinkin’, maybe you don't."
"What are you talking about?" I asked.
"I realize it's still early in our relationship, but we’ve been through so much together," she said, "I also am sure I love you with all my heart, and the idea of bein’ away from you is rippin’ me in two." She paused for a moment before continuing, "I realize this is a lot to ask, but I truly want you to move to Atlanta. I want us to live together, and before you say no, I believe it would be beneficial for you to get out of Charleston. It's been a traumatic and tryin’ time for you, and a fresh start might be the best thing."
I just stared at her for a moment. Part of me wanted to shout yes from the rooftops, but another part of me thought this was a little insane. We hadn’t even known each other two full months. I did love her though, and of that, I was completely sure. I finally spoke, "Andi, I do love you, I think every bit as much as you love me. I also would love to live with you, but this is a huge step. I would have to quit my job and move 300 miles away from everything I know." I paused for a moment, "I’m just not sure I am ready to make that kind of drastic change." The disappointment on her face was apparent.
She looked like she was going to cry, and she finally said, "I understand. If you change your mind, the offer stands." She went to the bathroom and closed the door.
***
The following morning after breakfast, I drove Andi to the airport. We didn't talk the entire way there. I wasn't sure how to fix things. I knew I had hurt her. I pulled into the cell lot, so we could talk. "Andi, please talk to me. I don't want to leave things like this."
"Dawn, it's alright. I understand why you had to say no," she said, "I simply need a little time to process. We’re fine, I promise."
I nodded my head and started to pull out of the lot. I stopped and looked at her. In that moment, I realized this woman was everything I had ever dreamed of. She was my beginning and my ending. She was my sun and my moon. She was my light at the end of every dark tunnel. Was it hasty to make a commitment this soon? Of course, it was. It was also the right thing to do. I knew it in the depths of my soul.
I looked over at her and said, "I'll do it."
She looked confused for a moment then replied, "Dawn, you shouldn’t do this because you believe I’m hurt, or because you’re worried we’re not alright, or whatever. You should only do it because it's what your heart desires. The offer is there if, or when, you’re ready."
"It is what I want, though," I countered, "I’m not going to lie and say it isn't scary as fuck, because it is, but I do want it. You are my everything, baby. I want to be with you. Always."
Epilogue
Andi
"Are you sure you are ready to do this?" I asked Dawn.
"I'm sure," she replied.
We were sitting in the parking lot of the psychiatric hospital where Tess had resided for the past two years. Dawn and I had been living together in Atlanta ever since those terrible events. I had asked her to marry me the weekend before. She felt as if she needed to see Tess and get some closure before we moved forward with our wedding plans.
We got out of the car. I took her hand, and we began walking toward the entrance. I opened the door for her, and we walked to the reception desk. The attendant asked if she could help us. "I’m Dawn Williams. I’m here to visit a patient, Teresa Allen."
The attendant typed some information into the computer, then said, "I need you to empty all your pockets and walk through the metal detector."
Dawn handed me her keys and cell phone, kissed my cheek, and said, "I'll be back soon."
She walked through the metal detector and the attendant gave her a sticky badge with her name on it. "Wait here," the attendant said, "an escort will be out to get you shortly." I found a seat in the reception area and watched as a large man in white scrubs escorted Dawn away.
Dawn
I walked down the hall of the hospital. I wasn't sure what to expect. It had been two years since I had seen Tess. She had been ruled incompetent to stand
trial and was committed to the hospital indefinitely. I was led to a room and asked to have a seat.
A few minutes later the door opened, and Tess came in with a different man. She was wearing gray yoga pants, and an oversized, Jurassic Park tee shirt. Her hair was longer, almost to her shoulders, and she had gained a little weight. She sat down across the table from me, and the man sat in the chair by the door.
"Hi, Tess," I said.
She smiled at me and said, "Hi, Dawn. I’ve missed you."
"How are you?" I asked.
"I'm great now that you're here," she replied, and then asked, "Are we going to be together, now?"
Her question surprised me. I couldn’t believe after two years, and everything that had happened, she still didn’t understand. It was at that moment I realized Tess would always carry these delusions, and she would likely live out her days in some type of psychiatric facility. I also knew this would be the last time I saw Tess. The person I knew as my friend was gone, if she ever existed at all.
I reached across the table and took her hand. I looked into the face I had so deeply cared about for most of my life and said, "Yes, Tess, we are."
She smiled at me, and replied, "I knew you would fall in love with me eventually." I continued to hold her hand as she told me what living in the hospital was like. I listened to her talk, and when she asked about my life, I told her I had started my own agency. I didn't mention anything about moving to Atlanta, or Andi.
After almost half an hour, I said, "I have to leave now, Tess, but I want you to remember that I will always love you, and you will always carry a piece of my heart with you."
Tess smiled and said, "I’ve always loved you, too, Dawn. When will you be back to see me again?"
"I'm not sure, but I’m leaving something for you with the attendant downstairs. Take care of yourself, Tess." We both got up, and I hugged her. "Goodbye, sweet Tessie."
"Bye, Dawn. I’ll see you soon." She walked out with the same man who escorted her in. A few moments later, a woman appeared to escort me back to the lobby.
Andi
I saw Dawn walking down the hallway with a woman. As she got closer, I could see she had been crying. She walked into my arms, and I held her for a few moments. She pulled away and asked, "Is the envelope in your purse?"
I opened my purse and pulled out the envelope we had brought. She took it over to the attendant. "I would like to leave this for Teresa Allen."
The attendant pulled out a sheet to write on, then asked, "What are the contents?"
"They’re pictures," Dawn said.
The attendant began writing, and said, "Remove them from the envelope, please."
Dawn opened the envelope and pulled the pictures out, one by one. The first one was a picture of her and Tess at a birthday party when they were in elementary school. The next picture was them at their first junior high school dance. There was a prom picture, then their college graduation, and finally a picture of them on a boat as adults. The attendant examined the pictures before putting them back in the envelope. "I will make sure she gets them." Dawn nodded as she took my hand, and we walked out of the hospital.
When we got to the car, she stopped me and looked up at me. "Thank you," she said.
"For what?" I asked.
"For being you, for supporting me, for being there for me through everything, and for loving me."
"You don't ever have to thank me for those things; it's what I was born for," I replied and leaned down to kiss her.
"Let's go home and plan our wedding," she said. I smiled at her. We both got in the car and headed home.
The End
ABOUT THE AUTHOR
Amy Bright is a native of North Carolina. She is a trained sociologist and works at a large research university. Her previous experiences in both law enforcement and mental health impact her writing and help her create complex characters. Amy and her wife have been married for nine years and contend they are still on their honeymoon. In their free time, they enjoy traveling and spending time with their children and four small dogs. Amy writes about conversations with her wife, as well as reviewing books on her blog, CONVERSATIONS WITH MY WIFE.