“Sure. The problem comes when you making a living includes helping some bastard apocalypse-worshipping cult launder a shit-load of money, and that cult is able to use their cleaned money to stockpile the crap needed for a massive terrorist attack.”
“I didn’t fucking know what the Children of Fenrir were up to, Brownstone,” Stephen hissed. “I can’t go to prison. If I do, those fuckers will have me dead within a week. They have access to serious magic!”
“Some would say the real magic is financial fraud, but that’s all the more reason to stay out of prison. So maybe you should play nice with me.”
“Wait...you’re not coming for me? I thought you told me if you ever called me again, it was because I was going down.”
James chuckled. “No, I just need you to drive up the price of a penny stock. I own a bunch, but I’m going to buy a bunch more shares to drive up the price. Can you spread those buys out through the...friends you told me about before, so it doesn’t all look like it’s coming from me?” He rattled off the ticker symbol for Experimental Sauces, Inc. “This week about ten thousand shares of the stock are going to be sold, and I need the price to be high as possible before that happens.”
“Wait, you’re going to sell those shares?”
“No, not me. Someone else.”
Stephen sighed. “Don’t you get how this works, Brownstone? You should sell right now. If you don’t, the price is going to drop once those shares are sold, especially…” he paused for a second, and James assumed he was looking up the stock “with a volatile micro-cap penny stock like this. I can set up a stop order for you so at least you don’t take a bath on what you have, but I recommend you sell right now, not double-down like a dumbass.”
“No, no. You don’t get it—I don’t want to sell, even after the price drop.”
Stephen groaned. “What is this, some sort of weird tax write-off thing? You hoping to lose money? Because you’re about to shovel in a bunch of money to prop up some stock and then not exit. It’s supposed to be a pump and dump, Brownstone, not pump and hold. It’s the opposite of savvy investment.”
James wanted to rub his eyes. “I’m keeping my stock in that company. Someday they are going to be the biggest star in sauces. I just need this temp spike to help somebody else out.”
“Why? I don’t get this. How does this even benefit you?”
James glanced at the worn stone church behind him. “Because my church has fallen on hard times. So you need to get this done.”
“Church, huh? I wonder if this little stock scheme will get me brownie points with God.”
“I’m sure God knows when you’re doing shit just for points, Stephen. Don’t worry about God, just worry about yourself and staying out of prison.”
“Okay, okay. I’ll get it done, but are we square?”
James snorted. “Hell, no. I just won’t come looking for you right now. So you do what I need, and do your family right. They are the only reason I let you go before. Understand?”
“I do. And thanks.”
The call ended.
Not blood money, Father. Just me robbing myself to pay Paul.
5
“I had a reservation for a truck,” James grumbled.
“Are you still bitching about that?” Shay snickered. “Afraid someone’s gonna question your manhood if they catch you in a mom car? Plenty of big strong men drive around in family SUVs, Brownstone.”
“I like the car,” Alison chirped from the backseat. “It’s comfortable, and it’s not as hard to get into.”
“My truck is comfortable,” James muttered. “Even if it is tall. Besides, the whole point of having a fuc— Having a reservation is that they are supposed to reserve the vehicle for you. The word is in the actual other word.”
The teen giggled, and the bounty hunter decided to drop his complaining for now. There were worst things in the world than being forced to drive a light silver Chevy SUV around. Not many, but they did exist.
They pulled off the main road onto a curving side road. The flight from LAX to Richmond International had gone smoothly enough, even with Shay insisting the male flight attendant in first class was checking her out the entire time. He wasn’t about to let her kick someone’s ass on a plane.
Dealing with the security would have complicated things.
The closer Charlottesville airport couldn’t handle supersonic flights, which forced them to Richmond and added another hour to the trip—but that still beat taking a regular flight directly into Charlottesville by almost four hours. It might have not been a cost-efficient travel plan, but it was definitely a time-efficient one.
Rolling green hills dotted the lightly forested area, with only the occasional recessed home or mansion in the distance at the end of a private road. There wasn’t a skyscraper or graffiti-covered alley in sight.
James hated it. It was all too bright and natural.
The air even smelled fresh.
“We’re almost there, according to the GPS,” James told them.
“Is it bad that I’m nervous?” Alison asked.
He shook his head. “Change can mess with people, kid. It’s understandable. And you’ve been through a lot.”
“You’ll do fine,” Shay added. “Everyone here is special, just like you.”
A tall and elaborate wrought-iron fence extended past both sides of the road ahead. An imposing gate sat in the center, bisecting the drive leading up a hill. Dense trees clogged the verges.
James slowed the SUV as they approached the fence, looking for some sort of security guard. A man in an ill-fitting suit walked away from the gate, a camera with a large telescopic lens hanging around his neck.
James pulled up beside the man and rolled down his window. “Is this the school?”
The man blinked at him. “The school. Yes, I was supposed to...something about taking pictures at the school. What was I doing here again?”
Way too early to be drunk, pal. Even Father O’Banion waits until nighttime. Sometimes, at least.
The man with the camera shook his head and continued trudging up the road and muttering to himself.
“Okay, that was weird.” Shay watched the guy wander off.
James shrugged and drove up to the gate. “They didn’t say anything about who to call. I assumed there’d be someone here.”
“Maybe it’ll magically know who we are.” Shay laughed.
The gates swung open as if pushed by invisible forces. No obvious mechanism was visible.
James glanced into his rearview mirror, in which the man’s silhouette was still visible. The school had been rather insistent that he let them know exactly who was coming.
He suspected some sort of passive magical defense the school needed to explicitly disarm. Judging by the camera, the poor man in the suit was probably a reporter trying to write a story about the school, and he hadn’t planned on dealing with that kind of spell.
James resisted frowning. That was serious magic. Then again, such magical knowledge was the whole reason they were bringing the girl there.
“Guess you’ll have to get used to that kind of thing, Alison.”
“What?”
“Oh, sorry, kid. The gate opened itself. I’m assuming it’s some sort of magic thing.” James pulled through the gate, which swung closed behind him.
Their trip took several more minutes, until a large building surrounded by a few smaller buildings appeared in the distance. The trees grew sparser.
Alison gasped and jerked her head to the side. “Wow. The energy is… It’s so beautiful.”
James glanced to the side to see what had caught her attention. “You’ve got to be fucking kidding me,” he murmured.
A white unicorn tromped along the side of the road. He would have sworn faint sparkles surrounded the thing.
There was movement on the opposite side of the road as well. Another hoofed creature floated among the trees, eyeing the car with wide reptilian eyes.
A lightly fla
ming halo burned around it.
The creature looked like some sort of strange cross between an elk and a small dragon. It had jade-colored scales covering its body, antlers protruded from its head, and a soft mane of white fur around its neck.
“What the hell is that?” James asked
Shay stared at the creature and shook her head. “Not sure, but I think it’s a Kirin. Kind of like the Asian version of... Hell, I don’t even know what to compare them to. They are supposed to be wise and benevolent and all that.”
“Its soul is as beautiful as the unicorn’s. The other thing was a unicorn, right? The energy shape kind of seemed that way.”
“Yeah.” James shook his head and took a deep breath. “Welcome to magic school, I guess.”
They didn’t spot any more bizarre creatures before they arrived at the main school, a huge extended Georgian manor surrounded by a constellation of smaller buildings. Teens of various ages in uniforms wandered the grounds, some with backpacks. Pointed ears protruded from more than a few of the students’ heads.
Two students who looked a year or two older than Alison appeared to be balancing scintillating balls of pulsing light on their hands. Another girl, a Light Elf who looked like she’d only recently made it out of grade school, leaned over and shook her finger at what appeared to be a ferret.
James refused to believe it was a ferret. Normal animals didn’t stand on two legs or wear rodent-sized suits and top hats. Hell, humans didn’t even wear top hats anymore.
Why did everything magical have to be so freaking complicated and weird?
Alison smiled brightly, and James took a deep breath. She could see the true nature of the place—the very souls of the people and creatures around them—and if she thought they were okay, that had to count for something.
He parked in a circular drive surrounding an elaborate fountain resembling a bird on fire. A phoenix, he assumed.
You’re not the only one who’s read a book or two, Shay.
Smaller roads led off in a couple of directions and he wondered if there was a parking lot, but the email they’d sent him indicated had that he should park in the circular drive.
They filed out of the car, with James surveying the area. Tactically it didn’t seem well-defended, with lots of blind spots infiltrators could take advantage of, let alone a forest that could hide an entire mercenary battalion.
Of course, that same forest was filled with Kirin, unicorn, and God knew what else. If he was right about the gate, it might be hard for normal humans to even get close to the main school grounds.
James rubbed the back of his neck, trying not to frown. If anything, all the fantastical displays proved that the School of Necessary Magic would be able to help Alison learn to control her abilities.
“Good afternoon, sir,” said a student, a fresh-faced Light Elf.
“Uh, yeah, same to you,” James rumbled back.
A few of the other kids waved, and he nodded. If he could make it the next thirty minutes without cussing or insulting anyone, he’d be doing okay.
Shay helped Alison grab her single suitcase from the back.
The teen had only taken a few steps when an older boy with his head buried in a thick book bumped right into her. Alison fell on her rear and winced, and the boy’s book fell to the ground with a thump.
James growled and took a step forward. “Time for a little appropriate punishment. Not going to let you knock a blind kid around, punk.”
The boy’s eyes widened. “I-I’m so sorry. I just... I wasn’t looking.” He held up his hands.
“You try a spell, kid, it’ll be the last thing you do. I’ve taken down a lot more impressive wizards than you.”
Shay laughed and placed a hand on his arm. “Dial it down, Brownstone. He’s not a bounty. He’s just a kid.”
James glared at the boy, who yelped, grabbed his book, and scurried off.
Alison pushed herself to her feet and rubbed her butt. “I’m okay, Mr. Brownstone, really. I wasn’t paying much attention myself. A lot of the energy here is different than what I’m used to.”
“Yeah, I can see that. Maybe not that, but I get the idea,” he admitted.
The first adult he’d spotted since arriving, a distinguished-looking older woman with short hair and dark glasses, marched toward them.
“You must be Mr. Brownstone,” the woman called as she made her way to them. She smiled at the teen. “And Alison.”
“Am I...supposed to bow or something?” James asked.
Shay slapped a hand to her forehead, rolling her eyes. “Seriously, Brownstone?”
The woman laughed and extended her hand. “How about I just offer you my hand? I’m Eleanor Hudson. I teach magical history and basic spells here. The headmistress was called away on an urgent matter, so she asked me to help Alison with her orientation.”
James shook the woman’s hand as he looked her up and down. “You’re human.”
“Yes, a human witch. I can assure you that every species here will be able to help Alison learn magic.”
She looked at Shay to keep her in the conversation. “Well, I do hate to be rude, but I’d like to get Alison’s orientation started. In the beginning, many things about the school may be overwhelming to new arrivals, so the orientation is critical to integration.”
“Okay. Yeah, sure.”
Alison walked over and threw her arms around James. “Thank you for everything, Mr. Brownstone. You’ll be at the parents’ weekend in two weeks, right?”
He placed a hand on her back. “Yeah, but before I let you go with Ms. Hudson here, you sure you have everything? Your phone?”
She nodded. “Yes.”
He raised an eyebrow. “Your backup phone?”
“Yes,” she answered.
“And the burner phones I gave you at the airport?”
Alison rolled her eyes. “Yes.” She held up her hand to stop him from continuing. “And the five one-use cards, Mr. Brownstone. I’m...fine.”
James’ shoulders sagged and he let out a sigh. “I’ll miss you, Alison.” He gave her a hug. “And I think by now you’ve earned the right to call me James.”
A soft smile appeared on the girl’s face. “Okay, James.”
Eleanor offered James and Shay a polite smile. “I assure you, she’ll be in the best hands on this planet.”
James resisted spewing out what he wanted to say. Alison starting off her school career with her guardian threatening to kill one of her teachers if she messed anything up probably wouldn’t be great for the teen’s chances of fitting in.
“I’m sure she will,” he replied instead.
“Come along,” Eleanor told Alison. She offered the two adults a final nod and turned on her heel.
Alison waved to James and Shay and hurried after the witch, rolling her single suitcase behind her.
James turned to say something to Shay, only to find her back turned and her hand near her face.
“Problem, Shay?”
She snorted and turned back around, eyes slightly red. “Just the pollen in these Virginian trees.”
James decided not to press her on her obvious tears. He wasn’t about to cry, but he also felt how much it hurt to see Alison walking away.
“C’mon, Brownstone. We still have a flight back to LA to catch, and you don’t want Alison to think you’re being stalky about possible boys.”
They took several steps toward the SUV.
“What boys?” James spun around, surveying the nearby students with an angry glare. “There were boys looking at her?”
Shay was annoyed that she’d almost cried in front of Brownstone. The last thing she needed was for him to have any sort of emotional leverage over her.
Still, she couldn’t help it.
Darkness had choked her life for so long, and seeing Brownstone doing his best to be a good dad—to try to give a shit—had just snuck past her defenses.
Am I going soft spending time around Brownstone? The guy’s not exac
tly touchy-feely.
They were halfway back to the airport before he spoke again, which made things easier for her.
“What’s with the case?” Brownstone rumbled.
“Huh?”
“That silver case.” He jerked a thumb over his shoulder. “The one in the back.”
“Oh, that? Just something I picked up on a quick day job. Just need to keep it with me until I can hand it to the client. Don’t worry, it’s not a bomb or an Inca zombie rod or anything.” She chuckled. “You should have just asked me, if you were curious. I figure we have that kind of relationship now. I watch your stupid barbecue shows, and you ask me if I’m carrying cursed explosive bones.”
He slid his eyes to her. “Are you carrying cursed explosive bones?”
Shay laughed and shook her head. “Nope, just some stupid boner magic shit.”
“Boner magic?”
“You know, like Viagra, except magical. That kind of shit is serious cash nowadays. Never underestimate how much a man will pay to make sure he can get it up.”
James snorted. “Okay. Anyway, figured you’d tell me if I needed to know. I…” He shrugged. “I half-ass trust you.”
“Fair enough.”
He exhaled slowly. “Speaking of jobs, I kind of need your help.”
“Oh?” Shay shot him an annoyingly familiar seductive smile. “Finally decided to give into the truth?”
James grunted. “No.”
“Closet case,” she muttered, and rolled her eyes.
“I’m not fucking gay,” James growled.
“Whatever. Just keep telling yourself that.”
“I don’t have to!”
Shay didn’t know what she believed, other than she couldn’t figure out why Brownstone didn’t seem to be into her. He’d at least acknowledged that he thought she was attractive, but even with all the time they’d spent together, he hadn’t tried to make a single move.
It wasn’t that she wanted him that way. He was just a partner. Sure, a partner with a body that looked like it’d been carved by some master sculptor, but still just a partner.
“Tell me about the job, Brownstone.”
James glared at the road for a few seconds before talking. “I’m trying to get an Oriceran artifact from the Professor and he’s agreed to help me, but he needs a favor in turn.”
The Unbelievable Mr. Brownstone Boxed Set One (Books 1-3): Feared By Hell, Rejected By Heaven, Eye For An Eye (The Unbelievable Mr. Brownstone Boxed Sets) Page 23