I know I’ll have to keep reminding her they don’t matter to me, and I’ll do it a million times a day if that’s what she needs.
“I…” she hesitates before she admits, “I don’t feel like a woman anymore.”
Christ.
“Fallon,” I breathe, shocked by how acutely the scars are affecting her. I position my body over hers, and the moment my pelvis presses against the gap between her legs, my cock reacts. I rest my forearms on either side of her head and press a tender kiss to her quivering lips. “Can you feel me?”
“Yeah,” she whispers.
“Trust me when I say, you’re a breathtakingly beautiful woman.” I press my cock harder against her, and I feel a burst of pleasure. “It’s only because I know you need time that I’m not ripping your clothes off right now.”
She hesitates, but sucking in a deep breath, she asks, “Do you really want me like that?”
“Are you asking whether I want to make love to you?” I ask to clarify, my eyes locked on hers. I rub my cock against her and lean closer until our breaths mix. “Cause the answer is an absolute, I’m aching to be inside you, yes.”
It’s becoming increasingly difficult not to give in to my desire for her. I want our first time together to be special, but God, my hands are itching to explore her.
Fallon lifts her head, and her mouth crashes against mine. Her kiss grows with urgency, and I let her have all the control, knowing how much it means to her.
Unable to keep still, I slip my left hand down to her hip and begin to slowly thrust against her.
Fuck, I’m going to explode in my sweatpants if we keep going down this path.
I tilt my head as our tongues hungrily stroke against each other. With almost zero self-control left, my hand slips under her cashmere sweater, and I caress the stretch of skin beneath her ribs.
She’s silky smooth, and I can feel her body heat increasing as our mouths devour each other.
My cock thrusts hard against her, and the pleasure is so intense it makes lights burst behind my eyelids. Breaking the kiss, I gasp for air. “God, Fallon. You’re making me see lights.”
“What? Really?” she asks, excitement coloring her voice.
I nod, a wide smile spreading over my face. “If we don’t stop now, I’m going to lose control,” I warn her, not wanting to push her too fast.
Fallon lifts her hand to my cheek, and her touch is tender. I can picture her eyes turning to liquid gold as she says, “I need you, Kao. Haven’t we waited long enough?”
Hearing her say those words to me restores some of my manhood I’ve lost due to my independence being almost non-existent. I don’t feel totally useless anymore. Loving Fallon gives me a purpose, and if that’s all I’ll ever be good for, I’ll die a happy man.
But then I start to think of the technical part of sex. “We have a small problem, though.”
Fallon’s voice is cautious as she asks, “What?”
I let out an embarrassed chuckle. “The condom. You’ll have to help me put it on. That’s the last thing we want to screw up.”
This is not the conversation I wanted to have with her right before we make love for the first time.
“Also, what’s the time? We don’t want Noah walking in on us,” I voice another worry.
The moment fades, and wanting our first time together being more special than this, I say, “Maybe we should continue making out? When I make love to you, I don’t want it to be here in the suite.”
A wide smile stretches over Fallon’s face as she teases me, “You just had an entire conversation with yourself.” She presses a soft kiss to my mouth. “It’s cute when you overthink things.” Another kiss. “I’m good with making out.”
When our mouths touch again, I don’t let her pull back, and I nip at her bottom lip. “It’s so hot when you do that,” Fallon murmurs against my mouth.
“This?” I ask, my voice low in my throat, and then I bite her bottom lip before thrusting my tongue into her mouth and kissing her hungrily.
Shifting my body half off of her and pushing her sweater up, my hand caresses her skin until I reach her breast. My thumb skims over her puckered nipple, and it draws a groan from me.
Pulling her bra out of the way, I cover her breast. Kneading her, my touch grows harder and my kiss more desperate, and I begin to forget all the reasons why we shouldn’t have sex right now.
A knock on my door has me pulling back so fast, I almost fall off the side of the bed, but Fallon grabs hold of me as a burst of laughter bubbles over her lips.
Climbing over her, I lie down beside her and throw my arm over my face as I chuckle. I manage to ask, “Are you decent?”
“Almost.” A couple of seconds later, she calls out, “Come in?”
The door opens, and I hear Noah ask, “Fallon, did you give him his eye drops?”
“Yeah, a while back,” she answers.
“How’s the migraine?”
“Gone,” I reply while sitting up, “We should probably get some breakfast.”
“You mean lunch,” Noah teases. “It’s already twelve.”
“Shit? Seriously?” Fallon gasps, and I feel as she begins to scoot off the bed.
Reaching for her, I grab hold of her arm and yank her back against me. “I’m holding you hostage for the day.”
“That’s my queue to leave,” Noah mutters. “Remember the eye drops at two.”
Noah shuts the door behind him. I push Fallon down and straddle her hips. My hands brush up her body until I reach her arms, and I pin them down to the bed. Then I lean down, and keeping my voice low, I say, “We have a month to make up for. Skip classes today and stay with me.”
Without thinking about it, she answers, “Okay.”
Grinning, I playfully say, “We can play nurse and patient.”
Laughter dances in her voice as she asks, “Should I check your temperature?”
Leaning down, I ask, “And how would you do that?”
Fallon lifts her head and murmurs, “With my mouth.” She presses a quick kiss to my lips. “Nah, no fever.”
Chuckling, I say, “Give it time. I can feel my temperature rising.”
Fallon pulls her arms free and places her hands on my thighs.
“Yep, especially with your hands so close to my cock,” I tease her.
Laughing, she begins to squirm out from under me. “Come on, we should get food.”
Pretending to sulk, I climb off the bed, then I grin, “Does this mean you’re dressing me again?”
“No, we’re ordering in.”
When she begins to walk toward the door, I say, “I need a minute before I can go out there.”
“Why?” Fallon instantly darts back to me.
Wrapping an arm around her waist, I pull her tightly against me. “I’m still hard for you.”
“Oh,” she says, a little breathlessly.
I let go of her. “Order anything you want. I’ll be out in a couple of minutes.”
“Okay.” When Fallon leaves, I sit back down on the edge of the bed.
It feels like we’ve taken a considerable leap in the right direction. This morning has easily been the best in my entire life.
Chapter 19
FALLON
While I was alone with Kao in his room, I began to forget about the scars. But the moment I walk down the hallway, the insecurities rush back, and I quickly dart into my room to brush my hair so it will cover the right side of my face.
Sitting down on the stool by my dressing table, I pull the bristles through my hair. My movements still, and I stare at my reflection.
Being with Kao, I felt like the old me and not this scarred woman. Feeling his desire for me, his kisses and touches – they all made the world fade away.
Slowly, I lift my hand, and I pull the hair away from my cheek. Revulsion builds in my chest as my eyes lock on the swollen red gashes. There’s a thick jagged one, stretching from my ear down my neck.
I let my hair fall back
and take a deep breath.
I can’t help but wonder if Kao is pretending the scars don’t bother him for my sake.
You wouldn’t care if Kao was disfigured.
I love him so much, and I want to be with him more than anything, but my trust has taken a blow. I guess only time will tell whether he’ll stay with me.
The thought makes my apprehension grow, and my shoulders slump.
I wish none of this had happened.
“Fallon?” I hear Kao call, and then he walks into my room. “Are you okay?”
“Oh, yeah,” I answer, injecting happiness into my voice. “Just brushed my hair. It was all over the place.” I get up and walk to him. “Let’s order food.”
We go sit in the living room, and I place an order with the restaurant, then I ask, “What do you want to do while we wait?”
He lifts an arm around my shoulder and pulls me into his side. “I want to ask you a favor.”
“Yeah?” I glance up at him.
“I have a follow-up appointment with my ophthalmologist on Thursday. Will you go with me?”
I don’t hesitate to answer, “Of course.”
“Will you be okay driving us there?”
“Yes.” I pause for a moment then ask, “Will you be okay with me driving?”
Kao nods. “We have to get back together in a car at some point. The sooner, the better.” The corner of his mouth lifts. “Besides, I trust you.”
My lips curve up, and I snuggle into his side. “What time is your appointment?”
“At ten.”
“I’ll ask Mila to take notes for me,” I say, making a mental note to remember.
“I’m already keeping you out of class today. Will you be okay missing another day? I can always ask my dad.”
“No, I want to go with you,” I rush to answer.
There’s a knock at the front door, and I get up to answer. Collecting our food, I carry it to the counter. “Food’s here.”
While Kao comes to sit at the table, I plate our food and get two bottles of water from the fridge. I place Kao’s plate and water in front of him and say, “I got us roasted vegetables and steak. I wasn’t sure, so I cut your steak into pieces.”
A nervous grin spreads over Kao’s face. “Thank you.”
I sit down next to him and watch as he tries to spear a piece of meat. Watching him struggle, my heart shrinks into a painful lump. Unable to sit still, I reach for his hand and stop him. “Can I help?”
Kao pauses and shifts on the stool, a frown forming on his forehead.
“Don’t be embarrassed, Kao,” I murmur as I scoot my stool closer to him. “Let me feed my man.”
My comment makes the corner of his mouth lift slightly. “This is foreplay for you, isn’t it?”
I let out a chuckle as I spear a square of steak. “Yeah, it’s a total turn-on.” I bring the food to his mouth and say, “Open wide.”
Kao lets out an awkward breath, but he takes the bite. After chewing and swallowing, he mutters, “Not my greatest moment.”
I lean closer and let my breath skim over his ear, then I whisper, “I already felt you hard between my legs. Nothing will make me see you as less of a man.”
Kao’s hand comes up, and he wraps his fingers around the back of my neck. “Now I want to drag you back to my room and finish what we started.”
“Be a good boyfriend and eat all your food, and I might just let you,” I tease him.
“Are you resorting to bribing me now?” He asks a playful expression dancing on his face.
I spear a carrot. “Yup. Open up.”
Movement catches my eye, and I glance to the hallway. Jase is watching us with a soft smile on his face. When our eyes meet, it widens into a grin. Then he turns and heads back to his room.
KAO
I’m not going to lie, lunch was hard. Having Fallon feed me chipped away at my self-esteem. I didn’t have the heart to tell her it was because she cut the steak into tiny pieces. Mostly I can make out food, just nothing small. Everything blurs together then.
Fuck, my eyes need to come right.
Fallon wanted to take a nap, and long after she’s fallen asleep, I feel way too restless to keep lying in bed. I move slowly, so I won’t wake her and quietly leave my room.
When I walk into the living room, I see Hana, where she’s sitting on the couch.
I take a seat on the other couch. “Hey, can I ask you a favor?”
“Sure, what’s up?”
“I want to do something special for Fallon tonight. Can you help me arrange everything?”
“Of course.” Hana gets up and comes to drop down next to me. “What do you need me to do?”
I tell her what I have in mind, and she helps me make all the calls.
When all the arrangements are made, I say, “Thanks, I couldn’t have done it without you.”
“You’re welcome.” Hana turns her body to face me and asks, “How are you doing?”
“I’m getting there. I just wish my eyes would heal quicker.”
She leans closer to me. “At least the color of your eyes didn’t change. Oh wow, the stitches look cool.”
“They only did a cornea transplant,” I tease her, then I explain. “It’s basically the gel layer over the iris.”
“What can you see?”
“I can see your face and what you’re wearing.” I focus on Hana’s face, then add, “Just not the finer details and no color. My sight’s still very blurry.”
She places her hand on mine. “I’m sure it will keep getting better.” Then Hana pulls back and says, “I wanted to talk to you about something.”
“Yeah?”
“The way you treated Fallon,” Hana begins, and instantly my stomach drops.
I square my shoulders, ready for a tongue lashing, which I totally deserve.
Hana takes a deep breath, then asks, “Why did you hurt her like that?”
“First, I blamed myself for her getting hurt, and then I didn’t want to saddle her with a blind man,” I explain.
“Have you worked through those feelings?” she asks.
“Yeah, and I explained everything to Fallon.”
“Kao,” I can hear the warning coming, “if you ever hurt my friend like that again, Jase will be the last person you should watch out for. I love Fallon more than anything, and seeing her broken like that…” Hana pauses, her voice quivering with emotion, “You didn’t just break her heart.”
Fuck, I feel like shit.
Lifting an arm, I wrap it around Hana’s shoulder and pull her into a hug. “I’m sorry, Hana.”
“Just be the man she deserves,” she murmurs as she hugs me back.
“I will.”
When we pull away from each other, Hana says, “I have to admit, tonight’s date is a good start.”
Letting out a chuckle, I say, “I hope she likes it.”
Hana gives my arm a squeeze, and then she gets up. “She will. I’ll go wake her so she can start getting ready.”
“Thank you.”
When Hana disappears down the hallway, and I stare at the coffee table. After a while, my sight sharpens, and I see clearer.
I let out a breath, and the corner of my mouth curves up.
It’s only a matter of time before I’ll be able to see fine details and color.
Chapter 20
FALLON
“How about this dress?” Hana asks as she holds it up.
“It’s only dinner at the campus restaurant,” I argue. “Jeans and a sweater will be fine.”
“Like hell,” Hana growls. “You’re wearing a dress.” She disappears back into my closet and comes out with a pair of heels. “And these babies.”
“Hana, it’s cold out,” I complain.
“That’s why they invented coats. Stop arguing and put on some lipstick.”
We’ve been at this for hours, but I can’t help smile at her determination to get me all dressed up.
“What’s Kao wearing?” I
ask before I swipe on some lipgloss.
“I’ll go check quickly.” She darts out of the room.
Getting up from the stool, I walk over to my bed, and I look down at the form-fitting white and silver gown I got from Donna Karan for the Christmas Ball. There’s a sad twinge in my chest, but knowing Hana won’t back down, I go to my closet and pick a black scarf to match the shoes, then I get dressed.
Hana comes back into my room as I carefully wrap the scarf around my neck to keep my hair in place.
She scrunches her nose at me. “I wish you wouldn’t do that. It will be dark outside soon, and no one will be able to see.”
I shake my head. “I’m not taking any chances. The scars are the last thing I want to worry about tonight.”
She pulls a disgruntled face but then smiles. “You look gorgeous.” She gestures toward my door. “Your prince awaits.”
I let out a chuckle as I pick up my clutch.
“Wait, the coat,” Hana gasps. She darts into my closet, and a couple of seconds later, she comes back with my black coat.
Taking it from her, I drape it over my arm and say, “Thanks for all the help. It was actually fun.”
“Have an amazing night.”
I walk out of my room, and when I enter the shared living space, Noah’s eyes widen on me. “Holy shit, you look stunning.”
“Thanks, Noah.”
My gaze locks on Kao, and the breath rushes from my lungs. He’s dressed to the nines in a dark charcoal suit.
God, he’s breathtaking.
He stares at me, his lips parted, and wonder settles on his face. The way Kao looks at me makes me feel beautiful, and a little of my crushed self-esteem trickles back.
I walk closer to him. “You look impressive, Mr. Reed.”
The corner of his mouth lifts. “You’re a vision to behold, Miss Reyes.”
I let out a chuckle. “Are you ready?”
Kao holds his hand out to me, and I take another step closer to him. Lifting my hand, I place it in his, and instantly tingles spread up my arm.
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