She laughed as she took my cheeks in her hands and pulled me to kiss her again.
“I've got you,” I whispered as I ran my hand further up her thigh. “You’re safe with me. But...” I stopped just shy of her pussy, noting the way she didn’t even come close to flinching. She felt safe with me and that gave me that warm feeling in my chest.
“Kit?” She was disappointed and that made my cock twitch with pride and anticipation.
“We’re not doing this here,” I explained.
As I picked her up, she giggled and wrapped her legs tightly around my middle but she was looking at me questioningly.
“Bedroom.”
I could see that excited her. “Yours or mine?”
“Mine?”
She nodded and I pressed another kiss to her lips before taking her to my room.
I put her down on the floor gently, helping her hold her weight in case it hurt her ankle. She scrunched up her face adorably as she tested it, then she smiled.
“Tender, but okay.”
“I’m glad,” I said as I took her face in my hands and looked down at her.
I wanted her more than I’d ever wanted anything in my life. I wanted her more than I wanted to breathe. I wanted her more than I’d ever wanted to get Hawk home for her. It was dangerous but I had no inclination to shy away from that feeling. I recklessly leant into it in a way I’d never done before.
“Kiss me, Kit,” she whispered, and those three words became my favourite.
So, I did. It was heat and passion and only all the good things in life.
Her hands pushed my jacket off my shoulders as I helped her out of hers. Our lips only parted when it was necessary and then found each other again quickly as we stripped each other down.
I could feel the hesitation in her now again, but there was resolve on her face so I spoke to her softly as I nuzzled under her jaw, reminding her it was me and I could feel her relax and hold me tighter again.
When we were both naked, I picked her up again and lay her on the bed, lying over her. She looked up at me with trust and heat and it made my breath catch.
I couldn’t stop my smile as I trailed my fingers over her breasts, the soft skin of her stomach, and felt her shiver as I dragged them over her pussy. She drew in a sharp breath, but there was a smile on her face as her eyes closed and her back arched a little.
“You’re with me, Amber,” I murmured softly in her ear as I dragged my finger gently over her clit and watched in satisfaction as she bit her lip and let out a soft moan.
“Only one thing left on your to do list,” she said with a smirk and I huffed a rough laugh. “You think you’re up to it?” Her eyes opened and she looked at me steadily.
I nodded. “Yeah. I think so.”
Her smirk grew. “We’ll see.”
I leant down to kiss her, and not just to shut her up. She threaded a hand through my hair as she kissed me back and I stroked through her wet folds lazily. I needed to get a feel for her, what she liked, what she didn’t.
Her hips rocked almost sub-consciously to the rhythm of my fingers. As I rubbed over certain parts, she tensed and her whole body froze. But it wasn’t that hesitation freeze, she was enjoying it. I knew I’d found the right spot when she pressed her forehead to mine and whimpered against me.
I increased my speed slightly, keeping my kisses leisurely. I felt her hand fist in my hair and her back arched off the bed. As she breathed heavily, I kissed her neck, her shoulders, her breasts, my fingers working her. She still had one hand in my hair and the other clenched the bedsheets under her as her body writhed to the rhythm we’d set together.
“You going to come for me, baby?” I whispered.
“Don’t stop,” she begged breathlessly.
13
Amber
Now this was definitely everything I’d ever played out in my fantasies. And then some. Kissing Kit was everything I’d dreamt of and more. But having his hand between my legs? That was even better than I’d ever imagined.
Before I’d totally given up trying, I’d felt that pleasurable build up a few times. That tight coil deep in your belly and the tingles in your clit. The way the pressure, the intensity grew, promising something wonderful at the end. It filled you full of excited anticipation and made you desperate for more. The way your muscles twitched like they wanted to get away and get closer all at the same time.
With Kit it was so much stronger than usual. All of it. My muscles did more than twitch, I was already shaking with the way he was making me feel.
And it wasn’t just my sense of touch that was filled with him. His voice was in my ear, a slow steady calming reminder of him. Not that I needed it with my nose full of everything I’d ever associated with Christopher Grayson. That musky scent with a hint of sweetness and some sort of spice, as though he’d found his favourite aftershave at thirteen and never changed it. I’d had a small freak out before as unwanted memories had rushed in, but all that was gone now and I had trouble thinking of anything but Kit and the fact it was his hand between my legs. Finally.
His fingers slid down me and over my opening. I whimpered again, annoyed he’d broken the rhythm, but also enjoying his touch.
“Fuck. You’re so wet,” he practically purred as he teased me with his finger.
It slid ever so slightly into me then back out again before his fingers trailed back up to my clit and he began rubbing me again. It was the perfect combination of pace and force. Had I been doing it myself, this would have been the time I overthought it, my arm cramped up, and I ruined it. But I wasn’t in charge. Kit was. So, I just lay back and let him work his magic.
“Don’t stop,” I panted again and I felt him shake his head slightly.
“I won’t,” he said as he took my nipple in his mouth as sucked on it gently.
And instead of all that twisting and knotting and coiling just fizzling out to an unsatisfactory nothing, it continued to build until I tensed around him, holding him tightly as my orgasm spread through me, tingling through my whole body.
I let go a breathy moan that was partly his name and shook harder with the force of it. As I rode it out, I stayed tense and chuckled in both nervousness and amazement.
“You right?” he asked, his voice tinged with laughter of his own.
I nodded, biting my lip as a shiver wracked my body again. “Yep.”
Kit nuzzled into my neck, his hand sliding away from between my legs and up my side. My skin was far more sensitive than usual and I giggled as I pulled away from him slightly.
He looked up at me with a smile. “You sure?”
I rolled my eyes. “Yes. Did you want a medal?”
“For succeeding where even you failed? Yes, please.” His grin was cocky and adorable.
I nudged him jokingly. “Too bad.”
Kit’s expression softened. “You sure you’re okay?”
I nodded. “Of course. Why?”
He dropped his face and ran his nose along my jaw. “I just want to make sure you’re comfortable. After…everything. I shouldn’t have…”
“Shouldn’t have what, Kit?” I asked, panic flooding me that he was regretting this already.
“I should have had better control,” he said. His nose was still trailing over my skin gently like it was an excuse to not look at me. “I should have slowed down.”
I leant my head against his. “I didn’t want you to slow down, Kit.”
And I didn’t. Sure, some of it had been momentarily terrifying. But Kit had always oozed protection. Combine that with the few too many champagnes and the fact I’d been in heat for him since…forever, but especially the last week, and you got a pretty potent temporary distraction. All I felt now was amazing. But I wanted more.
I wanted new memories. I wanted to put my past behind me, where it belonged. I wanted to fully move on. I wanted to let go. I wanted to know once and for all that fear didn’t rule me. And I had nev
er felt safer with anyone outside my blood relatives than I had with Kit. At three, thirteen, or twenty-three, I felt safe with him.
“But I knew, Amber,” he said softly. “I knew and I couldn’t help it. You just…” He sighed heavily and pulled back enough to look into my eyes. “You test my limits. You make me forget…everything. It’s embarrassing and amazing. But that’s no excuse.”
There was a warm fuzziness to the moment. Like we could say or do anything in this moment and it would be accepted, it would be believed. There was no hiding, just open communication and a swirl of emotions and sexual tension that felt as weird as it did right.
I took his cheeks in my hands and looked into his eyes. “I want this, Kit. I asked for this.”
“But I–”
“If you’d said no when both of us wanted it, what does that tell me, Kit?” I asked him.
He blinked. “What?”
“What does that tell me?”
“I…I don’t know.”
“It tells me you think I can’t make my own decisions. It tells me you think I don’t know what’s best for me. It tells me you think you get to make my decisions for me.”
“Amber, that’s not what I meant at all.”
I shrugged. “Maybe not. But I can make my own decisions and it’s my birth right to either live happily with or regret those decisions later, not yours. If you hadn’t wanted to kiss me, fine. But don’t go assuming you know what I want or what’s best when I’m literally telling you what I want.”
His eyes shone with the smile I was too close to see. “All right,” he said finally. “I won’t do that again.”
“Good. Because there’s something else I want, if you also want it.”
“Oh, yeah?” he asked, nudging my nose with his. “And what’s that.”
“I want to have sex with you, Kit.”
He paused and I wasn’t sure if he liked or hated the totally outright way I’d said that.
When he finally spoke, he simply said, “I’d like that, too. But…”
“But what?” I asked when he didn’t go on.
“But we’re taking this slow and the moment you feel uncomfortable, you tell me to stop. No hesitation. No politeness. Just ‘stop’. Okay?”
I could tell he wasn’t going to do anything unless I agreed. And, all things considering – being the mad beating of my heart and my shortness of breath – I was happy to agree.
Nodding, I told him, “Okay.”
He nudged my nose again with his, then kissed me softly. Everything about him was suddenly softer. It was – dare I even think it – romantic. I felt safe and loved and wanted in a way I never had before.
Our kiss was slow, our hands lazily tracing each other’s bodies like we had all the time in the world, our bodies settling and moving together like they were made for it. His body was warm against mine and rougher in a ruggedly sexy way. His stubble rubbed against my skin – my cheek, my neck, my collarbone – as he trailed kisses all over me, but I liked it.
“You sure?” he whispered gently in my ear.
“If you ask me one–”
He planted a kiss on me and I could feel his smile. Then his nose nudged mine and he was looking into my eyes.
“Sorry. I can’t help but want to protect you…”
My heart fluttered wildly and I took a deep breath. “And I appreciate it. But I know what I want.”
A look passed through his eyes so quickly I wasn’t sure I’d seen it right, but it looked like pain. “I’m still surprised that’s me.”
“You worried I’ll change my mind?” I sassed, knowing now was no time for deep and meaningfuls. I wanted Kit to be my first and I wanted it to happen now, but I was worried we’d lose the moment.
I saw his smirk in his eyes. “Maybe.”
“Then what are you waiting for, Christopher?”
He chuckled roughly, pressed another kiss to my lips, and reached over to the bed side table. He pulled out a condom and made short work of getting it on, then settled back between my legs.
“Just breathe, baby. I’ve got you,” he whispered softly as he lifted my leg higher around his hip.
On my exhale, I relaxed and felt his tip at my entrance. A momentary flashback got me, but Kit’s voice was murmuring steady nothings in my ear and I took a breath, filling my senses with everything that was him. I relaxed again and let my head fall back as he slowly started sliding into me.
I knew it would be worse if I tensed, so I spent so long trying to stay relaxed that I must have seemed really weird to him, because the next thing I knew he’d paused and was asking, “You okay?”
I looked at him and smiled. “Sorry. Trying to relax.”
He sniffed against a smile. “Do you want me to stop?”
I shook my head against his pillows. “No. Sorry.”
He kissed my neck as he murmured, “Don’t be sorry. What can I do?”
I sighed as his lips trailed over me. “Nothing…”
“Nothing?”
“Mm…nothing. Don’t stop,” I breathed, then realised he’d slid the full way in and was thrusting slowly and steadily.
“You sure?” I heard the teasing in his tone.
My leg hugged him tighter. “I’m sure.”
Still thrusting slowly, he drew back to look at me. “You’re beautiful, Amber.”
“You’re not so bad yourself, Kit.”
I took his face in my hands and brought him down to kiss me again.
It didn’t take long for our bodies to fall into a perfectly-synced rhythm. I felt stretched, but it still felt good. All I could think about was him and me and us. I didn’t worry about how right it felt, how it felt like I’d found something I’d been looking for my whole life but never realised I’d been missing. I didn’t worry about the potential consequences of what we were doing. It was him and me and it was perfect.
Now and then, he’d murmur my name or, “Fuck,” like he was feeling the same way.
After one such whisper, we caught each other’s eyes and I was utterly stunned by what I saw in his. His smile was soft, sincere, and I felt all wrapped up in warm and fluttery tingles by the total lack of emotional walls between us.
Everything combined to give me this ditzy, little coy grin and his smile turned more cocky, it was more wry.
“You feeling good, baby?” he asked.
I nodded. “Yes.”
“Good. You ready for a little more?”
I felt my eyes widen. “More?”
He was suddenly every part the gorgeous, sinfully sexy, arrogant guy, but I knew it was all for me. His half-smile was all cocky pride as his pace increased. My body arched towards him as my head fell back.
“Oh, shit,” I breathed, my hand fisting the sheets under me as my other held him tighter.
“Good?” he asked, more like he was asking if I was okay than actually needing a performance report.
I nodded. “Good.”
He brought my lips to meet his and kissed me hungrily as he pumped me harder.
That warming, tingling, coiling sensation started low and sluggish in me and I leant into him, wanting more of it. It was like Kit could read my every thought and movement. He held my hip firmly, making sure I kept my knee high.
“Fuck, Amber. I don’t think I can–”
I shook my head against his. “Don’t,” I pleaded.
He kissed me again. It was hard and frantic and I gave him back as good as I got. Kit thrust into me faster and everything tingled in excited anticipation. The pressure in me built and I was sent over as Kit groaned in satisfaction, his forehead pressed to mine.
“Oh, shit,” he breathed as he thrust slowly and lazily.
I huffed a laugh, which turned to proper giggles as he peppered me with kisses.
Then he was gone and dealing with the condom. I rolled over to watch his very fine backside, figuring I didn’t have to pretend to not look at it this time.
When he turned back to me, that sexy smirk was at full power.
“Like what you see?” he chuckled as he climbed back into bed and snuggled us under his covers.
I nodded. “Very much. I always have.”
“Oh, really?”
I nodded, stifling a yawn. “Really.”
Kit gently brushed a piece of hair off my face. “You feeling okay?”
I smiled at him through sleepy eyes. “Perfect.”
His smile was almost enough to keep me awake, but sleep was pulling at me pretty damned insistently. I saw his lips move, but didn’t hear his words as I drifted into the best sleep I’d had in years.
14
Kit
I woke when my phone started buzzing on the nightstand next to me.
It took me a moment to work out what felt strange. As one hand flailed around for my phone, I opened a bleary eye and saw the reason with her damned beautiful hair splayed out all over my pillow and my arm. I was smiling before I’d fully registered everything that was going through my head.
I’d never woken up with a woman before that wasn’t part of a job. I’d never wanted to. I’d also never had a woman in my bed since I was about eighteen. It made for an easier getaway when you were at theirs. Let them fall asleep, then slip out without any awkward discussion about repeat performances or number swapping. Some people called it cowardly, some called it a dick move, and I called it tactical.
But I’d watched Amber fall asleep the night before and felt nothing but warmth and happiness. I’d had no inclination to get her to her bed or to leave her there in mine. I’d wanted to hold her close and feel her heartbeat against mine as I let myself fall asleep. So, I’d done exactly that.
And now, watching her wrinkle her nose in her sleep, I had no inclination to leave her. But it was past nine and I needed to go to work. I needed to get to work and I was conflicted; I didn’t want to disturb her but I didn’t want to leave without saying goodbye either.
I managed to slide out of bed without waking her up – she just made my heart hitch in my chest at the way she snuggled down into my bed like she belonged there. I showered with a smile on my face and, when I was finished, she was still asleep. I carefully moved around my room as I got dressed, keeping my eye on the sleeping beauty in my bed. And I couldn’t wipe the goofy smile off my face the whole damned time.
Chaos & the Geek (Grace Grayson Security Book 1) Page 14