“That sounds lovely, but you and Alchan are different from me,” she said, shrugging. “I grew up in a temple where love was talked about all the time, and beautiful things surrounded me. I’ve never really wanted to have sex, and that kind of kills the idea of love, doesn’t it? There needs to be some attraction, at least sometimes.”
“You’ve…” Rain realized what she was saying and ducked his head down to speak softer. He started them walking again, leaving the bustling market and the village entirely as he tried to find the right way to ask. “You’ve never been with anyone?”
“No,” she whispered. “And don’t pity me, please. I’ve never met anyone who made me want to. I’ve had people ask, so the option has been there. I…like to think I’m a little pretty, but no one has ever interested me.”
Rain stared at her for a minute. The Andinna were inherently sexual people, one of the reasons the Elvasi called them barbarians. Females took multiple husbands more often than not, and most males were very fluid with their sexual interest before settling down. Very few Andinna were like Rain or Mat, firmly in one camp or the other.
He had certainly never met an Andinna who wasn’t interested at all.
“I know it’s strange,” she said in her peaceful small voice. She seemed very secure about her lack of a sex life, which was contradictory to the vibe he got when they spoke about love. She’d been lying when she said she never thought about love, but sex? She couldn’t care less if she ever had it. He could see it on her face, the clear disinterest.
“It’s not…I’m not judging you. I’m only slightly confused.” He didn’t want to offend her. She lived a different type of life, and he wanted to know more. “Even…I’ve met Andinna who were slaves and hurt in unimaginable ways, but they still enjoyed…sex. I’ve never met anyone who didn’t care about it at all. We’re a very…” He waved a hand around, hoping she would catch his meaning without him needing to say it. He normally had no problems talking about sex with anyone, except for his own father, but this new information about Lilliana made him feel crass, an odd sensation.
“Andinna love sex. I know.” She gave him a wry smile. “Raised in a temple of Amonora, remember?”
“Yeah…”
“It’s not that I think sex is bad, I just never found anyone I wanted to have it with.”
“No one at all?” Rain repeated, wondering if she really meant that.
“Not a single person,” she confirmed, nodding. “People want sex out of their relationships, so if I can’t give them that…” She shrugged again. Rain found the gesture dismissive. “There’s no reason to think about something like love or marriage.”
Rain slowly nodded as her logic sank in, and he really began to understand this little female.
“Then Leria sent you here, where she expected you to…”
“Yes.” Lily crossed her arms, holding them to her chest as if she needed to fight off a chill. “It’s okay because while her behavior leaves something to be desired, you and Alchan have been very honorable and patient with me. Thank you. When this is all over, I’ll find a new home, and neither of you will be bothered by me again.”
“Do you have any family you want to go back to?” Rain asked, offering his arm again. “We can make sure you do.”
“I don’t have any family. I’m certain I’ve mentioned it, but I was raised in a temple…as an orphan. When they realized I was an ahren, my parents gave me up when I was a baby, and they never came back. Without their names, I don’t know who they are or if I have family left anywhere.” There was sad acceptance radiating from her.
No. No one should have to accept that.
Rain considered not saying anything, but it went against who he was. He hated seeing people alone. He had plenty of love in him and room in his heart to have a big family. It was a gift he could give freely.
This female, just like another he once met, had only known loneliness in her life.
No. No, I can’t let that continue.
“I’ll be your family.”
She stopped walking, and he stopped as well. She looked up, her eyes were wide with surprise.
“What?”
“I’ll be your family,” he said again. Realizing she was shocked and confused, he decided to tell her a quick story. “Once, I met a lonely female in Elliar. She had no one except the legacy of her parents and her own reputation. She had no friends, husbands, or even the simplest of allies. So, I went to her and told her that I would be her ally. I would be her brother. I would be her first and only family if I had to be. She saved my life in that place. Today, she’s Mave Lorren, King’s Champion. She has four husbands; one of them is my father. I don’t like seeing people alone, Lily, so I’m offering…I’ll be your family. Until you find your own, until you don’t need me, or forever. Forever works. I’ll be your family for as long as you’ll have me.”
Blinking back tears, she wiped her eyes, ducking her head low enough to shield her face from him. When she looked back up, her amethyst eyes glittered.
“You do me a great kindness,” she whispered, swallowing back more tears.
“I only do what I think is right,” he said softly. He reached out and pushed her hair behind her ear. “And this is right. You are right. No matter what anyone tells you or their reactions to who you are.” He wrapped his arm around her shoulder, and they started walking again. To lighten the mood, he leaned down and whispered, “Though you should know, I’m only into males, so I can’t really offer all that much.”
“Then we’re in luck because I don’t need to ask for all that much,” she retorted.
They laughed as they walked home together.
17
Mave
“There ya are,” a male purred as Mave fell into her bed of furs. Arms wrapped around her, pulling her close. Mave found her face in the chest of a male and a pair of hands roaming her.
“Bryn,” she murmured. “What are you doing here?”
“Takin’ an afternoon nap because I have to go out tonight,” he answered, nuzzling his face into her hair. “Ya?”
“Taking an afternoon nap because someone didn’t let me sleep much last night,” she retorted. His masculine chuckle was one of very little guilt since he was the one who hadn’t let her sleep.
His sleep schedule was a mess. Neither she nor Luykas ever knew when Bryn would be in or out. He was always disappearing for his secret meet-ups with his scouts. They didn’t publicize where he met them, and he told very few. Not even she knew. If the information leaked, their information could be tainted. Worse, their scouts could be killed. The scouts didn’t live in the village, and all of them were single. That way, no one really questioned where they were or what they were doing. Bryn crafted the entire system from the ground up, recognizing the weakness of the traditional way it was done with scouts reporting directly to the general or king in the nearest war room.
“I wasn’t tired, ya were here, and I’ve learned not to miss a chance with my wife. I know I’m busy and gone a lot now,” he whispered, kissing her forehead. “One day, this war will be over, and I’ll be able to kick me feet up again.”
“Or we’ll be dead,” she reminded him, casually shrugging.
“Also a possibility,” he agreed with a chuckle. “I was just wakin’ up. What have ya been doing today?”
“Training with Emerian. We sat in on another of Trevan’s lessons.” She knew better than to say the Elvasi’s name to this husband, but she hadn’t been thinking about it until the name was already out of her mouth.
Bryn tensed. He still didn’t trust Trevan, and Mave was beginning to worry he never would, no matter how much the Elvasi did for them. Trevan could jump in front of a sword for Bryn, and she was fairly certain Bryn wouldn’t even bat an eye, only continue his own hatred. It was concerning, to say the least.
“At least he’s doin’ somethin’ useful,” Bryn muttered, letting her go before sitting up. “I think I’m goin’ to head out—”
�
��Wait,” she ordered, making him pause, frozen in position. “I’m going with you.” She certainly wasn’t going to let him wander off in a mood, and she rarely had the chance to be with him anymore.
“Ya don’t even know where I’m goin’,” he said with a strain in his words, a sign he was upset by the mention of Trevan.
“I don’t need to know because I’m just going to follow you,” she said with no small amount of snappiness. “Who am I going to tell about the meet-up spot?” She started to stand and sighed. “Plus, I don’t want to see you leave in a bad mood. I wouldn’t be able to sleep even with you gone.”
He sighed, and she took it as a sign he would admit defeat.
“Aye, the only reason you don’t know is it’s just not necessary.” Another drawn-out sigh as he rubbed his face showed Mave just how tired he was from his schedule. “Fine, ya can come with me. It’ll be nice to spend the evenin’ together.”
“Good.” She got out of bed, glad she hadn’t bothered to strip before falling down. “You get dressed. I’m going to get my boots back on. Will I need my swords?”
“I never leave the village without bein’ armed,” he answered. “And we will be leavin’ the entire valley.”
“Okay, then.” She walked out to find her boots and swords. She was done before him, but she had less to do to get ready. He came out of the bedroom, and she watched as he finished up—boots, sword, several daggers in different locations, all tied together by two more additions, a short bow he threw over his shoulder, and a scarf he used to cover most of his face. She figured it would be too hot to wear something like that, but he never complained.
He gestured for her to follow him as he walked to the door. Leaving their home together, they walked down the stairs instead of taking off in flight.
“We’re not flying?” she asked, frowning.
He lifted a finger over his mouth, shaking his head slightly. He wanted silence.
Mave put her hands on the pommels of her swords as they walked, looking around and giving him what he wanted. Silence. They even walked softly, her picking up on how carefully he was moving through the trees. He hadn’t picked a trail but went straight into the forest and moved quickly.
Judging by the incline, we’re leaving the valley the hard way. This is how he’s kept people from finding him when he’s out of the valley.
Reaching a clearing, Bryn pulled his scarf down as he stopped by a loud, wide stream. Not quite a river, but more than a trickle of water entering the valley.
“Ya can talk here,” he said quietly. “But keep it down. I like this spot because the stream has small rapids that obscure what can be heard by others.”
“Is this where you meet them?”
“One of them,” he said, nodding sharply. “That’s another of my secrets. I don’t meet everyone in the same place. That’s too vulnerable. Every scout I send out has a meetin’ spot where I find them, or they can find me at. Sometimes, they’ll beat me here, and I’ll catch them campin’, which is fine. This spot is where they live when they aren’t goin’ out.”
“Oh.” Mave was amazed he had put so much thought into it, not that she thought he would do any less. He just considered more than she would. “They don’t have homes?”
“They have a low tent, a bedroll, some light cooking equipment, but nothin’ that can bang or make too much noise. They live on the land, just like I did when I went on scoutin’ missions,” he explained. “They’re fine. Half of them are wild at heart and wouldn’t do well in the village or on a team. The other half have…problems with those situations.” He gave her a sad look. She understood, even if she didn’t get any details. Trauma was funny like that. The very things she thought were her safe harbors could be prisons for others. “They all make good scouts, though.”
“It just seems like a hard life,” she commented softly. “As long as they’re happy, though.”
“That’s how Alchan looks at it, too,” Bryn replied with a small chuckle.
They stood there, waiting patiently. She didn’t know what she was supposed to be looking for, but Bryn was content to sit in the grass and stare at the afternoon clouds, so she joined him.
At one point, she felt Luykas send a curious wave through the bond, and she sent one back, asking him to ignore her and her whereabouts for a little while. Their mastery over the bond only grew, and she was beginning to understand how Nevyn and Varon could hold an entire conversation in a glance. It went beyond the definition of what Luykas told her about the blood bond when it happened. If they ignored it, they could only pick up physical sensations, but when they cared for it, they could do so much more.
“Luykas wanted to come see us,” she told Bryn softly. “I told him to leave us be.”
“Thank ya. He’s too close to the spies for me to be comfortable lettin’ him see this half of the intel. It works both ways, though. He doesn’t let me see the spy books anymore, and none of my scouts have them. They bring in information the old way.”
“Sometimes, I think half the rebellion is run out of my home,” she said with a teasing poke to her husband’s ribs.
“Aye, it is,” he confirmed with a grin. “And yer very gracious for lettin’ us run wild and get things done without demandin’ too much of us.”
“And you are very gracious about letting me focus on other things as well—like Emerian. Having a nemari is much more work than I thought it would be. Isn’t he supposed to be working for me?”
“Sure, if ya want a bad nemari.” Bryn reached out and grabbed her hand, his thumb making circles on the back. “A nemari runs errands, manages schedules, and more, as an exchange with the one trainin’ ‘em. It goes both ways. For all the time you spend trainin’ him, he’s supposed to take somethin’ off your plate. It teaches comradery in an upcomin’ warrior. A lesson that no individual can thrive unless the unit thrives. Ya don’t have much of a schedule to manage, though, so it probably feels a bit one-sided.”
“He’s not bad, but you’re right. Maybe I should have him do more. What is a nemari supposed to do?”
“I’d say ask Rain and Alchan, but…” He pulled his hand away and made an obscene gesture. “We know how that played out.”
She couldn’t stop the laugh. “I know! Ah, Emerian is a good male, but I don’t think a warrior and nemari relationship is supposed to play out that way. Actually, that was what pissed off Zayden.” She remembered it clearly now. “It’s actually exactly what isn’t supposed to happen.”
“That’s right, but ya know what? Who cares?” Bryn shrugged. “Yer just like every other female in the village. Ya look at that mutt like he was chiseled by the gods, and if you want to go that way, none of us are goin’ to care. I think we wouldn’t mind another husband or several if it means bein’ with ya.”
“I do not,” she said, elbowing him.
“Yes, ya do. So does Senri, and she has another baby on the way and hates her own husbands. So does Allaina, and she’s addin’ a wife to her family. The only female who doesn’t look at Emerian like he’s a piece of prized meat is Yenni, and we all know why that is.” Bryn laughed.
“How do you even know all of this?”
“I’m observant,” he reminded her with another grin. “It’s been an interestin’ study. A lot of Andinna have a hard time trusting Luykas for being a mutt. I think it’s because of his obvious ties to Alchan, which makes him intimidatin’, on top of different. He also does sorcery and blood magic, a taboo. Then everyone found out about Shadra. Some still whisper about that, which I keep an eye on for his safety.”
“I know about that last part. Is there anything to be worried about?”
“No, not yet. If there is, I’ll call the entire company together to handle it or deal with it before it goes any further,” he promised. “But that’s Luykas. Emerian is a different case. He’s a mutt, sure, even acts more Elvasi sometimes, something that annoys me, but I can’t…I can’t hate him for it. He is who he is.”
Mave made sure no
t to point out the double standard. He was fine with mutts, even if they acted like an Elvasi sometimes, but an actual Elvasi? Absolutely not.
“Every female just looks at him and sees how pretty and kind of lost he is. I think half the females in the village want to save him from himself, while the others want something exciting, not understandin’ he’s really no different in bed than the rest of us. I have evidence of that now, too. Luykas is a mutt, and he’s…not all that special.”
“You spend a lot of time thinking about this?” she asked, smirking as his face turned a light shade of pink.
“I spend a lot of time out here, walking alone. When I’m in the village, I’m vigilant. A combination of information I’ve been able to obtain and too much time out here dealing with the scouts, who keep me movin’. I’ve noticed and figured out lots of fun things I keep to myself.” Bryn shrugged.
“Oh, now you’re teasing me. Tell me something,” she ordered, rolling to put her head on his shoulder.
“I can tell you that Rain and Lady Lilliana are becomin’ best friends, somethin’ I’m sure Alchan wants no part in. Just last week, they went to the market together when it opened. They’ve gone every day since, and from what I hear, it’s laughter and smiles for those two.”
“Really?” Mave considered asking him to spy on that further but decided against it. She would just harass Rain. She had very limited experience with Lady Lilliana, something every dominant in the valley shared. Alchan kept her out of the public eye or at least away from where any of the dominant females like to spend their time. The little ahren never came to a training field, and Mave never went to the market in the morning. Normally, it was her last stop of the day for a snack.
“Oh, ye—”
He stopped, sitting up quickly. Mave sat up as well, looking around. She hadn’t heard anything, but Bryn was staring intently.
“Come on out,” he called softly. “She’s here with me today.”
Out of the shadows of the trees came a thin male, looking more than a little rough and wild. He had a somewhat fearful expression, like a wild animal that saw a potential predator but wasn’t sure.
The Champion's Ruin Page 20