He served up their food and together, they ate. The conversation between them flowed, and Autumn marveled at just how easy Cody was to talk to. She felt as though she could tell him anything.
While they’d been friends since high school and they’d had many adventures together, it had always been with others coming along for the ride. Luke and Evie, mostly, but other school friends and townsfolk their age.
She’d never really spent much time alone with him, and she was enjoying herself immensely.
After they’d finished dinner and the dishes had been cleared, she slipped into the kitchen, grabbed two plates and some cutlery, and took the pie she’d made out of the fridge.
Once she’d served up two generous slices, she put it back and carried the plates over to the table. Setting one down in front of Cody, she took her seat and waited nervously.
He appeared to examine the plate closely, turning it this way and that for inspection. “Wow.” He finally looked up at her and grinned. “What is this plate of deliciousness you’ve set down in front of me?”
“It’s a triple chocolate mousse pie. Chocolate crust, milk chocolate mousse, and white chocolate mousse on top.”
He scooped a large piece up and ate it, moaning loudly. “Marry me.”
Autumn let out a laugh before covering her mouth with her hand. “Marry you?”
“Yep. I could definitely live with dessert like this every day.”
She leaned over and poked him in the stomach. “I’m not sure your belt would fit if you ate dessert like this every night.”
He gave her a grin, but the look in his eyes made her shiver. “I guess I’d have to make sure I exercised every day.”
Autumn was not exactly experienced when it came to sex, but she wasn’t so innocent that she missed the implication.
Picking up her spoon, she very deliberately brought a piece of the pie up to her mouth and then licked it clean. She did the same with every mouthful that followed, and they watched each other as they ate.
Cody shifted uncomfortably in his seat, and desire made her blood run hot inside her veins. Wanting to tamp down the flare of lust coursing through her, she took another bite of dessert to distract herself, but realized it was a mistake when he stood up suddenly.
“You finished dessert?” His voice was gruff as he rounded the table to stand in front of her.
Her spoon clattered to the plate and she dared to look up at him. “Yes.”
He pulled her up out of the chair, wrapped his hand around the back of her head, and covered her mouth with his. His kiss wasn’t gentle, as it had been the first time their lips had met on Christmas Eve.
This kiss was all-consuming. Desire lit her up on the inside, and she couldn’t stop the moan that tore from her throat.
His tongue swirled inside her mouth, sliding against hers. She wrapped her arms around him, clinging to him as he kissed her over and over until she was breathless.
Once he let her go, he placed his forehead on hers and they both breathed deeply, filling their lungs. Her hands came up to cup his face and she closed her eyes, content to just be near him.
What was this man doing to her?
Her lips found his again, but this time their kiss was gentle. Just lips pressed against each other affectionately. Once it ended, she couldn’t stop the smile spreading across her face.
“You want to watch a movie before you go?”
Cody’s offer relaxed her. She had been a little worried he might want to continue on in the bedroom, and she wasn’t entirely sure she was ready to sleep with him just yet.
Even though a small part of her wanted to. Very much.
But Autumn was cautious by nature, always considering her actions carefully before going ahead with them.
This probably stemmed from a lifetime of being criticized by the man who’d sired her. She knew she had disappointed him from the day of her birth.
He’d wanted a boy and had gotten her instead. Something he’d often blamed her mother for, even though she’d had no role in determining the gender of their only child.
He’d never let Autumn forget he’d wanted a son to carry on the Grant name. That it was because of her difficult birth Ruth Grant hadn’t been able to bear any more children.
Her mother had told her repeatedly she was secretly glad she’d not been able to have another child, because Autumn was perfect in every single way.
For every emotional blow her father had landed, her mother had countered it with praise and affection.
It had been a strange way for a little girl to grow up, but fortunately she’d favored her mother in every way that mattered.
“Darlin’?”
Her mind had wandered off again, and she blushed. “I’m sorry. Yes, a movie would be great, and then I’ll head home.”
He nodded, gave her the grin she’d already come to love, and stole one last kiss before they settled on the sofa together.
Cody put his arm around her and she snuggled into his side, kicking off her boots and curling her sock-clad feet underneath her.
They kissed every now and then, and the feel of his lips on hers lit up every corner of her soul.
Once the movie was over, Autumn stood and reluctantly put her boots back on. She didn’t want to go home. The house she lived in was surrounded by a dark pall. Being around her father never made her happy.
She was always on edge, nervous to do anything that displeased him for fear of setting him off into one of his rants about how useless she was.
How no man would ever want her. Why would they? She had nothing to offer. She was plain to look at.
How she would be a lousy mother and shouldn’t ever breed.
Her mother would always tell her to ignore him, that his words were lies and she’d be a wonderful mother someday. While she desperately wanted to believe her mom, her dad’s words cut deep.
It was why she’d only ever dated and slept with one man before. He’d been the first man to show any sort of interest in her, and at the beginning she’d felt grateful he’d looked twice at her.
Now she was older, and a little wiser, she knew exactly why he’d bedded her—to use her as a pawn. She’d eventually come to learn of his family’s desire to buy the large orchard the Grants owned, and they’d thought the best way to succeed was to try and butter her father up by having their son date his daughter.
She’d naïvely believed he’d dated her because he’d wanted to. That perhaps he’d loved her.
He hadn’t.
Autumn wanted to find real love with a man who adored her. A man who’d hold her when she cried or was sad. Someone who’d appreciate her as a human being, as a woman. A man who loved her for who she was, not what she could offer.
But it was in her nature to guard her heart closely. It was the most precious thing she could offer any man, and she wasn’t going to hand it over to just anyone.
Cody Whittaker was the first man in a long time who made her think that maybe—just maybe—he could be the one she could entrust her heart to.
That thought had Autumn smiling as she stood and stretched to work out the kinks in her back.
“Thank you so much for tonight, Cody. I really enjoyed myself. Dinner was delicious.”
He rose up off the sofa and tucked tendrils of hair behind her ear. “I’m glad you came over. I’d love to see you again, Autumn. Want to have another date with me?”
The words burst out of her before she could stop them. “Yes, I do. Very much.” The smile he’d put on her face slipped off again. She took a deep breath before going on. “Cody, I really like you. I do want to spend more time with you.”
“But your father is going to be a huge issue. I get it.”
She blinked rapidly to stop the tears that threatened to well up. “I’ll completely understand if you don’t want to see me again. We can just leave it here.”
Every fiber of her being prayed he wouldn’t want that, but she knew she had to give him that choice.
/> “Are you joking? I don’t want to leave things here. Do you?”
“Of course not.”
He took her hand and squeezed it, giving her a grin. “Then we’ll just have to get creative.”
4
By the time Autumn swung her car into the driveway of the Grant ranch, she was floating on cloud nine.
Cody had kissed the hell out of her before he’d let her leave his cabin. They’d made plans to have dinner at his place again the following week, and they’d talked a little about keeping their burgeoning relationship under wraps.
Autumn was reasonably certain that nobody in Aurora Springs would tell her father she was dating Cody, even if they knew. She wasn’t unaware that he was universally disliked by pretty much everyone, and nobody would want to cause any trouble for her or her mother.
She knew some people pitied them. She suspected Sheriff Collins kept a close eye on them from afar because he was sweet on Ruth Grant, although she knew her mother would never cheat on her father, no matter how distant their marriage had become.
Her mom had been forced to call the sheriff’s department several times in the past, when her father had been so enraged he’d screamed at them both and broken things around the house.
He’d stopped displaying his anger physically, because if there was one thing Jed Grant valued more than anything, it was his private business staying that way.
She was grateful to find he was already in bed by the time she stepped inside the house. Her mom was still awake, sitting on the sofa with her knitting while she watched television.
“Hi, honey.” Ruth looked up as Autumn entered the room. “How was your date?”
She stopped in her tracks, her mouth falling open slightly. She’d never mentioned anything to her mother about where she was going.
Ruth chuckled. “Don’t look so surprised, Autumn Mary. You think you can hide such things from your mother?”
Autumn’s gaze automatically went to the ceiling. The bedroom her father slept in was right above the living room.
“Stop worrying. He’s sound asleep and I’m not talking loudly.” Ruth started knitting again, needles clacking as she went. “So, did you have a good night?”
“Yes, Momma.” She sat down on the sofa next to her mother. “I had a wonderful night.”
Ruth kept her gaze on the television, occasionally glancing down at her knitting. “Is Cody Whittaker a good kisser?”
“MOMMA!” Autumn spoke in a loud whisper. She felt the blush steal over her cheeks and patted them lightly.
Ruth laughed. “Oh, did you think I didn’t know who you were seeing tonight? I think the hickey he gave you at the wedding gave the game away.”
Her fingers flew up to her neck as mortification set in. “He did not give me a hickey at the wedding. And I never said I was with Cody.”
“You didn’t have to. That very big grin on your face says it all.” Ruth paused her knitting and reached over to squeeze her daughter’s hand. “I think Cody’s a lovely young man, Autumn. Luke too, for that matter. I hope you’re going to see him again.”
She paused for a few moments. “We’re having dinner again on Tuesday night.”
Her mother smiled as she examined her purl stitches. “Good. And you didn’t answer my question.”
Autumn stood. “Yes, Momma. Cody is a very good kisser. I’m going to bed.” She leaned over and kissed her mother’s cheek. “Good night.”
“Sweet dreams.”
Once she’d reached her bedroom, she closed the door gently and threw her bag onto her bed. She went into the small en suite attached to her bedroom, and once she’d brushed her teeth and washed her face, she chose something comfortable to sleep in.
Digging out her journal from the hiding spot she stored it away in, lest her father get the sudden urge to search her room as he’d done previously, she made herself comfortable on her bed and wrote about her night.
About how much fun she had. How easy it was to be around Cody. How he made her feel when he kissed her.
How she wanted him to kiss her in other places.
How she wanted to kiss him everywhere.
Autumn wasn’t a virgin—her first boyfriend had soon divested her of that—but she couldn’t claim to be very experienced, either. As she wrote, she realized she wanted to have sex with Cody Whittaker.
All in good time, though. There wasn’t any rush. She wasn’t going to hop into bed with him just because her hormones were getting the better of her.
She truly believed the best relationships were built on a solid friendship. She knew her mother had barely known her father when she’d agreed to marry him. He’d been charming and eager, and Ruth had been swept off her feet.
It was only after they’d exchanged vows that Jed’s true nature had surfaced, and Ruth had become pregnant with Autumn before she’d gathered the courage to leave the marriage.
Autumn preferred to focus on the good things in her life. She loved her mom. She loved baking and being able to sell her pies. She loved being in the large, airy kitchen of the family store, creating tasty desserts and baked goods that the entire town enjoyed and kept coming back to buy.
She loved penning her private thoughts in her journal. It allowed her a freedom her father did not.
She liked Cody Whittaker very much. They’d only had one date, but she could easily see that turn into something deeper. Something she’d never experienced before.
Autumn didn’t think it would take much for Cody to steal her heart, and that scared the shit out of her.
Over the month of January, Autumn joined Cody for dinner one night a week at his cabin. Their meals were always delicious. He raved about whatever dessert she had brought with her for them to enjoy. They kissed a lot.
Each night ended the same way; they’d watch a movie together, and then he’d kiss the shit out of her before letting her go.
And when she got home, she’d be counting down the days until the next dinner. It soon became apparent that one night a week wasn’t nearly enough, but she was cautious with good reason. She didn’t want to do anything to make her father suspicious and start questioning where she was going.
She was also aware that it was unfair to ask Cody to keep their burgeoning relationship a secret, but he didn’t seem overly perturbed. Autumn knew his family was aware they were spending time together, because it had been the topic of conversation over lunch with Evie.
The blonde had invited her out one Saturday, and the two of them had tucked themselves away in a corner of Stella’s Diner and talked for hours.
Autumn was incredibly grateful for Evie’s unwavering friendship and was thrilled her friend had returned home for good. She knew Evie could be trusted with her secrets and was fully supportive of any serious relationship with Cody developing.
Valentine’s Day rolled around and when Autumn arrived at Cody’s cabin, she was gobsmacked to push open the front door and find the space had been decorated with dozens of candles, giving it a warm, romantic ambience.
A heart-shaped box of chocolates sat on the dining table, tied with a red ribbon. Dinner was warming in the oven, and Cody was waiting for her, gift in hand.
When he confided he’d wanted to buy her a dozen red roses but didn’t because he knew she wouldn’t be able to explain where they’d come from if she’d taken them home, tears swam in her eyes.
She unwrapped the slender, rectangular box he held out to her and gasped when she saw the necklace sitting inside it. The chain was a delicate gold, and on the end sat a small charm in the shape of a pie with a piece cut out of it.
Autumn grinned. “It’s perfect.”
“For my favorite baker.” Cody took the chain out of the box and twirled his finger around. She turned and lifted her hair so he could clasp it around her neck.
She turned to face him once more and touched the charm with her finger. “I love it. Thank you.”
Rising up on her toes, she brushed her lips against his in a gentle kiss,
but then he curved his hand around the back of her neck and deepened it, his tongue exploring her mouth.
By the time he let her go, they were both aroused and breathing heavily. There was no way she couldn’t feel the hard length of his cock pressing against her stomach, and she was wet.
A very big part of her wanted to take his hand and pull him into his bedroom, but the rational, pragmatic side of her hesitated. They’d been dating for less than two months and had only been alone a handful of times.
There didn’t seem to be any rush. Cody had never pressured her to do anything with or to him.
But that night, desire sizzled through her veins and made her blood heat up.
So when his hand slowly trailed up her bare skin underneath her top and cupped her breast, she moaned softly. His thumb stroked her nipple through the lacy bra she’d dared to put on earlier, and she moved closer, eager for more.
His lips peppered her neck with kisses, and Autumn wanted to throw caution to the wind.
But then Cody withdrew his hand and stood abruptly, leaving her feeling deflated.
“I’m sorry.”
She rose up to stand in front of him. “Why? You haven’t done anything wrong.” She threaded her fingers through his. “I enjoyed it. Very much.”
He grinned and pressed his lips to hers. “So did I, but I don’t want you to feel pressured into doing anything with me. I’m not going to lie to you, Autumn. I want to sleep with you, but I need to know that’s what you want, too. We can take this as slowly as we need to. There’s no rush.”
Autumn gazed into his eyes. This man had already become so dear to her in such a short period of time, and she was so tempted to give in to the lust that burned inside her, but she didn’t. Fear and doubt warred for dominance. Since she’d only ever slept with one man, she worried her inexperience would undoubtedly show.
This was something she would need to discuss with Cody, but she didn’t want to ruin the moment by bringing it up. “You’re amazing, you know that?” She snaked her arms around his neck and hugged him tightly.
Finding Home (Being Home Book 2) Page 3