“Tell me I’m awake and didn’t just have the best dream of my fucking life,” I beg Viper, still in shock over the turn of tonight’s events.
“Oh, you’re awake alright.” He’s quiet for a minute as we lie there listening to the shower turning on.
“Think she’s going to come out of there and pretend nothing happened or do you think she’s going to freak?” His question gives voice to my fears.
“I don’t know, Vipe, I’m still a little shocked about how all that played out. I don’t want her to look at it as a mistake and pull back. I don’t know about you, but I want in there so fucking bad it took everything I had not to throw her down on the floor and fuck the shit out of her. It doesn’t help that since we talked about us all being clean and tested the other night, all I’ve been able to think about is sliding inside her bare.”
When I asked her if she needed contraceptive pills picked up, she told me she had the implant and had been tested. Then with a smirk, she said it wasn’t necessary anyway as I wasn’t getting my dirty dick near her. After pinning her to the bed and tickling her until she cried mercy, I kindly informed her that Grim, Viper, and I had just been tested too, and were all clear. She changed the subject after that but I’d had a one-track mind ever since.
Viper and I don’t speak while we wait for the water to shut off and the fallout to occur. We look at each other and climb out of bed, making our way to the bathroom. The door opens, revealing Megan wrapped in a giant towel. She indicates with her hand for us to use it so we do, having no qualms about seeing each other naked as we have a hundred times over. We clean ourselves up and head out to the bedroom, expecting to find Megan back in bed, but the room is empty.
“Fuck,” I grumble. “I guess freaking out won.”
Turning, I blow out a relieved breath when I find her ass—at least that’s the part I zero in on—bent over with her head in the fridge, wearing nothing but one of Viper’s T-shirts this time. The shirt has lifted enough to show the bottom of her bare ass. She stands up abruptly with a yogurt in her hand, freezing when she sees us standing there, watching her.
“What?” she asks quietly, almost too quietly for me to hear. “I’m freaking starving.” She pouts before pulling open a drawer, looking for a spoon.
Viper drags his hand through his hair before walking towards her. When she doesn’t flinch, he places his hands on her hips and steals the spoonful of yogurt she was about to pop in her mouth. She watches his mouth as he sucks the spoon clean, her eyes widening as his tongue licks over his lips. Fuck yeah. I love how responsive she seems to be to us.
“I’ll throw some frozen pizzas in the oven, then you, Zero, and I are going to have a little chat, okay?” He says it softly, with just a hint of a threat threaded into it, a habit formed way before he became the president of Chaos. It doesn’t matter that she can't hear the cadence of his voice, it's part of who he is. She shrugs her shoulders, not negatively, more of a “whatever” kind of gesture, making me smile. Viper might ooze authority, but Megan is a natural-born rebel. These two are going to either come together like fireworks or C-4. Either way, there’ll be an epic explosion.
She tosses her spoon and yogurt cup in the sink before walking towards me with a smile, plonking herself down on the edge of the bed again.
“It’s so weird having a kitchen in the bedroom but I can’t deny how handy it is,” she comments, eyeing Viper as he rummages around in the freezer for the pizza.
I walk over to her and sit beside her as she tucks her long legs up under her T-shirt. My fingers twitch as her hair falls over my arm. I snag a piece of it and twist it around my fingers, loving how soft and silky the strands feel.
“Why do you always play with my hair?” Her voice is loud, surprising me a little in the quiet room. It must show on my face as I look at her because she flushes and tries to turn away. I tug the hair in my hand, refusing to let go and preventing her from looking away. How can she stroll around the room like naked goodness then get embarrassed over something as silly as how loud she is? As Viper pulls up a chair and sits directly in front of her, I realize it might seem small and insignificant to me but it’s a big fucking deal to her.
I answer her question to deflect the attention from her and give her a chance to regroup for a minute. “My mother was a junkie who only ever really cared about her next fix. Sure, sometimes she’d get clean and be the best mother a kid could ask for, but it wouldn’t be long before she lost herself in a needle again. I think it was worse that way, you know? If she never got clean, then I’d never know what I was missing. Instead, I would get these glimpses of normality, of what life could be like in a parallel world where mothers loved their sons more than their next high. It was never long before the dream was snatched away and the nightmare that was real life returned.” I pause for a second when I feel Megan’s hand on my thigh, staring at it as if it were a lifeline, anchoring me in the here and now so I don’t lose myself in the turbulent memories of my past. I slip my free hand over hers and weave our fingers together before continuing.
“When it was good, it was really good, but when it was bad—” I shake my head as visions of my mother's face float before me. “When it was bad, I would find her wherever she had passed out and lie as close as I could get and stare at her hair. It was how I measured how bad it was. She always liked it when I played with her hair when she was clean, but when she was jacked up her hair was often covered in vomit and jizz. She had to earn the drugs somehow, after all.” I look at Megan, waiting for the pity, but it never comes. I guess her story isn’t too dissimilar to mine. “That was all I knew when I was young, a cycle of dirty, clean, and repeat until she took too much. When I crawled over to her that last time, I knew she was gone by the glassy-eyed stare, so I played with her hair one last time, just the way she liked it, until they came and took me away.” I cough to clear my throat. I keep my eyes on hers, which are wet with unshed tears.
“When I run my fingers through your hair, it's shiny and smooth and reminds me that I'm not that little boy anymore. That’s not my life anymore, I’m now a man living in the parallel universe I once only dreamed about.”
Chapter Seven
Megan
It's so easy to forget when your life is knocked off course, everyone else’s isn’t necessarily running smoothly. I run my finger over the back of his hand in comfort, thinking about how much everything has changed in the last week.
“Tell me why you don’t speak,” Zero asks me. If it had been Viper, I might have been able to play it off, but not with Zero. Not after that.
“I can’t hear how loud I am. Sometimes I’m too quiet and people strain to hear me. Sometimes I’m too loud, making people startle uncomfortably.” A hand on my knee has me turning to face Viper.
“Fuck them. They don’t matter.” He tells me something that, on a logical level, I already know.
“People fall into two categories: the ones who are trying to be nice and won’t say anything, not realizing I can read their facial expressions or that their unease makes me uncomfortable. Then there are the assholes who think it’s funny to mock the deaf girl, like I don’t have enough shit to deal with. I should have thicker skin. I get that now, at twenty-two, but at sixteen, it was just one more blow to my already battered self-esteem.
“So I stopped talking, stopped giving people another means to make me feel less than them. Eventually, it became my norm,” I shrug, remembering the moment I stopped talking and withdrew a little from the world. It's not that I haven’t spoken at all since then. It’s just not something I do if I can avoid it. Meeting new people makes it even easier because they don’t know I can speak, so it feels less like a lie.
“Well, that shit stops now!” Viper answers, the scowl on his face showing just how angry he is on my behalf. I would find it endearing if he wasn’t trying to dictate to me again.
“No, it won’t. I’ll speak to you guys but you can't make me speak to anyone else. If and when I’m ready,
it will be my choice who I speak to. I don’t trust anyone here enough to put myself out there,” I state emphatically, knowing I won't back down on this either.
“If you don’t give people a chance, you’ll never earn their trust,” he warns, making me shake my head. He just doesn’t get it.
“I don’t need to earn their trust. I owe these people nothing. They failed me as a child and abandoned me as an adult. They’re the ones that need to earn my trust, not the other way around.” He looks like he wants to disagree but wisely holds his tongue.
Zero squeezes my hand so I look at him. “You trust us, though, obviously.” He nods his head towards the bed, so I’m gathering he’s referring to the dry humping from before.
I snort at that. I can't help it.
“I trust you guys less than anyone.”
When they both cross their arms across their chests and scowl at me, I can't stop my smile from forming.
“Seriously? You think because I rubbed myself against you I suddenly trust you?” I laugh.
“You bartered me away from my brothers like I was a possession, not a person, took me back to the place that haunts my dreams, handcuffed me to the bed, forgot to feed me, and forced me to comply with your wishes when I disagreed with you. Oh, and let’s not forget the part about me being groped in my sleep by a stranger. Did I miss anything?” I ask them as Viper stills for a minute, as if listening to something before stomping off to the kitchen area, leaving Zero to stare at me.
“You missed the incident with the pancakes,” he points out helpfully.
“Ah, yes, of course, thanks for the reminder. I won't be eating there anytime soon, that's for sure.”
“They won’t do anything now, I can promise you that,” Zero assures as Viper walks over and hands Zero and me each a plate of pizza slices.
“You can't know that for sure.” I raise my hand to Viper who sits with his own plate. “I know you can threaten them and kick their asses, but so do they. They’ll just hide it better.” I take a bite of the cheesy goodness and moan in contentment when the tangy tomato sauce hits my tongue. I swallow it down and lick my lips before opening my mouth to take another bite, when I find two pairs of eyes focused on me. I roll my eyes and ignore them. Hot sexy bikers they might be, but pizza is pizza.
Viper seems to be considering his words before he speaks, so I brace myself.
“You freaked out when Grim, you know, but with us…” He trails off again. I always feel like I’m filling in the blanks with these guys. Luckily, I speak idiot fluently.
“I’m not afraid of sex and I’m not afraid of being touched. I like my body and I’m happy in my skin. It took a long time for me to stop seeing all my flaws and focus on the good stuff. I mean, I have pretty eyes, right?” I ask Viper. He nods in agreement.
“And my boobs are spectacular, huh?” I ask Zero, making him choke on his pizza.
I shrug and take another bite, swallowing it down before continuing. “I have had enough people turn on me because they deemed me defective in some way. One day I woke up and decided I wasn’t going to be one of those people too. It took time and I worked really hard on how I saw myself. I took chances, learned my body and the things I like. I experimented and let my curiosity flow. I know now what I like, what I might try again with the right partner, and what is a hard no. And spoiler alert, guys, I like sex. I like it sweet and slow and hot and dirty. I like it deep and tender while pushed up against the wall and fast and hard bent over the kitchen table as I’m pounded from behind.” I smile as Viper adjusts himself.
“Waking up with a stranger pinning me down and groping me is a trigger. In all fairness, it would trigger most women. Given my history, my reactions are extreme. Unless I’m going to find myself pinned down by random strangers regularly, it shouldn’t be an issue.”
“That, I can guarantee, won’t happen again,” Viper promises.
Grim hasn’t slept here at all since we relocated even though I’ve been safely sandwiched between these two each night.
“He’s not a bad guy, Megan—” Zero defends him.
“But he’s not exactly a good guy either, is he?” I place the plate on the bed and sigh.
“I need you to be honest with me. Did you know, when you made that deal with my brothers, that you were going to make me your old lady? Or was it a spur of the moment decision?” I already know the answer but I need to know if they are going to lie to me.
“Yes, we knew,” Viper admits unapologetically. Yeah, that’s what I thought.
“Why would you do that to me?” I ask him, my eyes boring into his.
“For protection. As our old lady, you’ll be safe from anyone inside Chaos that still harbors ill will.” It’s cute that they think that but I suspect they just made me a bigger target.
“And when the truce between Chaos and Carnage is strong, you’ll just let me walk away?”
Viper’s face switches from remorse to anger at the drop of a hat. “Never.”
“Yeah, that’s what I thought.” I start to stand but his hand stops me.
“I won’t apologize, but I won’t give you up either, Megan. You might hate me now but you won’t always,” he remarks, confident in his choice.
“I don’t hate you, Viper. I’m just disappointed. I expected more, which is ridiculous, I know. You could have spoken to me—”
“Would you have agreed to be our old lady if I’d asked?”
“We’ll never know now, will we, and that’s the crux of it all. You’ll never know. Not today, not in five weeks, nor in five years if I stayed because I wanted to or because you took my choice away from me.”
This time he does let me stand. I take the plate to the sink and then make my way to the bathroom. I brush my teeth using the new toothbrush they got me and look at myself in the mirror. What to do, what to do? My staying is crucial for both clubs, now more than ever, but what about me? My whole sordid past is wrapped up in this club and now I’m supposed to just hand over my future too? Fuck! I toss the toothbrush back into the tumbler and pull the door open, ready to lay down some ground rules. I collide with Viper, who’s standing in the doorway.
“Jesus—” Whatever else I was going to say is cut off by his mouth on mine and his hands on my ass lifting me off the ground. I wrap my legs around him and let out a grunt when my back slams against the wall as his lips move from my mouth, over my chin, and down my neck. I see Zero standing in the space Viper had occupied.
“Is this Viper speak for sorry?” I ask Zero, my last word coming out on a gasp as Viper sucks on a spot where my neck meets my shoulder.
“I told you,” Viper lifts his head to speak, “I don’t say sorry.” He dips down again and presses a kiss against my skin, his warm breath making me shiver.
“Damn, and here I was ready to actively encourage you to be an asshole from now on. I’m all for this kind of apology.”
His breath comes out harsher and it takes me a second to realize he’s laughing.
“Okay, I get it. I accept your non-apology. But there are going to be some conditions.”
His head snaps up at that.
“Oh dear, Mr. President doesn’t like taking orders,” I tease, making him frown.
“I’m the one that gives the orders and you’d do well to remember that.”
I laugh in his face. “If you wanted obedience, you should have gotten a dog.”
He tosses me over his shoulder before I can say anything else, giving Zero a nice view of my naked ass, which he promptly slaps as he lets us past.
“Ouch, Zero. I thought you were the nice one,” I grumble.
Viper flings me unceremoniously onto the bed, making me bounce once before he straddles one of my thighs, leaving space for Zero to straddle the other. Holy fuck, watching them stare down at me half-naked, their eyes blazing with lust as the T-shirt I’m wearing exposes more than it covers. I think I just had a mini-orgasm.
“Zero isn’t nice,” Viper tells me, his hand trailing slowly up
my leg.
“He’s nicer than you.” I squeal when he lightly pinches the inside of my thigh.
Zero smiles down at me.
“They call me Zero because I give Zero fucks about most things. If I’m coming after you, you’d better run. There’s not a lot I care about so if someone tries to mess with what I do, they’ll die. Does that freak you out, knowing the man that comes home to you will have broken skin on his knuckles and blood on his clothes?”
“Zero, I’m a woman. I’ve been washing blood-stained clothes since I was fourteen years old.” His grin turns feral at that. Then I feel it, his hand on my leg, sliding its way up just like Viper’s on the other one. My breathing picks up as they come closer to my core.
“Ground rules, guys,” I manage to pant out even as I feel myself slicken thanks to their ministrations.
They both pause with their fingers just at the crease of my thigh.
“So, tell me these rules, Megan. What’s number one?” Viper asks before he starts to gently tap his finger. Oh god, I feel myself getting wetter.
“I’m selfish. Given the fact that there are two sets of hands on me, I’m a goddamn hypocrite to boot, but I don’t care. I won’t share you with anyone else, so if we do this, there are no club whores for you while you’re with me.” Viper frowns, making me swallow. This is a deal breaker for me. They might have tied me to them but I won’t sleep with them if they are getting it elsewhere.
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