“I think I can’t make that decision for you. I only knew you briefly when you were with him. Even then, all I know about him is what you told me. I can’t tell you what to do.” She nodded a couple of times, accepting my answer as I took a deep breath to stop the pain in my heart.
Chapter Six
My knees bobbed up and down with every bump on the road as the bus battled through rush hour traffic. Today, I would return to work. It was part of an “easing back into work” programme which consisted of a half day in work every other day. I was ready for the change of pace. A few weeks of moping around the apartment had me crawling the walls. At the same time, I was incredibly anxious. The last time I remembered setting foot in Baker Contracts, I got coffee and scanned invoices. Cat said my role had evolved significantly since then. In fact, I had an assistant who got me coffee, a strange turn of events.
I’d progressed from receptionist to assistant to customer support, and then last year, I was promoted to customer support coordinator, where I managed my own team. It felt surreal, considering I’d no idea what I was supposed to be doing.
My stop flashed on the board above my head, and I departed. A drizzle lingered in the air, not enough to make me reach for my umbrella just yet. I walked the short distance to the large estate which held Baker Contracts, but when I reached the door, I realised it was locked with a keypad.
“Well, look what the cat dragged in!” The familiar voice caused me to spin to face the woman behind me. “Please, tell me you still remember me?” The dark-haired woman bit her bottom lip anxiously as she stood under an oversized umbrella.
“As if I could forget you, Kim,” I said, and she pulled me into a hug. She’d started as an intern with me on my first week. “You still work here? You hated this place.”
“Not as much as you did, honey. What can I say? It pays the bills, and that’s enough for me, especially with another one on the way.” She pulled back, hand on her pregnant belly, and entered the code in the keypad.
I struggled to keep my mouth from falling open in shock at her small bump. Kim was a party girl with pink hair who never wanted to settle down, was drunk most of the time, and jumped from a bad relationship to the next. She now stood before me, a woman wearing oversized glasses in sensible footwear with a “Best Mummy” travel mug.
“It’s two-two-five-three, by the way, considering your head is emptier than it was before the accident,” Kim joked as we stepped into the foyer of the building and out of the rain.
“Hey, at least I show up to work sober,” I said and was happy to see she remembered just as clearly as I did.
“Remember how wasted we used to get at lunch and then roll back into the office?”
“Those happy-hour shots were never a good idea. It made Walker so much easier to deal with, though.”
“Thankfully, he was fired.”
“He was?” I beamed with glee. “There is a God. And who took over for him in finance?”
“You’re looking at her.” She chuckled. “I know, I used to hate it, but now I call the shots, and frankly, everything is so much smoother. Wow, you really don’t remember anything, do you?”
“Annoyingly, no. Last time I laid eyes on you, you had pink braids and a nose ring,” I said as she giggled. “And now…”
“I’m a mummy with my third on the way.” She patted her round tummy as I caught sight of her large engagement ring and matching silver wedding band. “Things certainly change.” Kim nodded toward the elevator. “Come on, I’ll show you to your office. You’ll be wandering around the corridors for the rest of the day if I don’t.”
“Did they renovate?” I asked when nothing in the building looked familiar.
“Yep, expanded the whole division. Big investment from our US partners.”
I nodded along with her as my gaze travelled around the modern and sleek office. My memory of the space was old, dull, and outdated, with computers and boxes of invoices lying around. Now the office was full of young people in casualwear hooked up to laptops and drawing on whiteboards. Gone were the big honchos in expensive suits acting as dictators, and now it looked like Google’s headquarters, with a few of the young employees waving and welcoming me back, unaware that I had no idea who they were.
“How are you feeling, by the way?” Kim asked as we stopped in the kitchen, and she poured me a coffee from the machine.
“Good, physically. Most of the cuts and bruises are practically gone, and I got the stitches out of my head and arm a couple of days ago.”
“And mentally?” she asked.
“Not a fucking clue.” Kim cackled, spilling her tea on the counter a little. “Seriously, I have no idea who any of those people were out there. Caterina calls me a vegetable.” I shook my head while Kim composed herself.
“Give it time, honey. Soon enough, you will be calling the shots in here.” She winked before leading me out of the kitchen. She nodded down the hall. “You’re just down there on the left. Your assistant’s name is Tansy, and she will be expecting you.” I took a deep breath as I followed her eyes down the hallway. “If you need me, you remember where finance is?”
“How could I forget?” I rolled my eyes before saying my good-byes and making my way down to where Kim had pointed.
When I came to the open door, I saw four desks all facing each other with soft music playing in the background. I looked around the small, quirky office space where colourful posters hung on the walls, and there was a mini fridge stocked with beer in the corner. Two people were frantically typing, seemingly unaware of my presence. I cleared my throat, but neither of them budged. It wasn’t until I moved farther into the room that one of the guys jumped to his feet, yanking the headphones from his ears.
“Elena, you’re back.” He looked shocked as the other worker who’d had his back to me also jumped up and smiled brightly.
“Hi,” I said to the two twentysomething guys who stared back at me expectantly. “I’m sorry, I don’t—”
“Damn, Tansy told us you wouldn’t remember our names. I’m Sam, and this is Chuck.”
“Charles, actually.” The man who’d had his back to me corrected as he pushed his glasses farther up his nose and straightened his shirt.
“His name is Chuck ever since he dropped his laptop in the foyer fountain,” Sam said as Charles rolled his eyes.
“She doesn’t remember that, dumbass.”
The two began arguing as I silently watched their bickering. Then I remembered I was their boss. I couldn’t be that strict if they felt comfortable enough to argue in front of me. I took solace in that before I interrupted them.
“It’s nice to meet you both. I was told to look for Tansy.”
“She went to the bathroom, I think.”
“Okay, and where do I normally sit?” I asked as Sam slapped his head.
“Right, duh!” He thumbed over his shoulder. “Your office is back there.” I smiled before making my way toward the small office at the back of the room. “Can I get you anything?”
“I’ll be okay, thanks…”
“Sam,” he finished for me with a soft smile as I willed my mind to remember it.
“And Chuck.” I pointed to the other employee, who nodded, accepting that Chuck was his name for the rest of eternity.
I closed the door, leaving the boys to bicker, and was surprised to find my office so spacious. Not enough to do kickboxing, but I had enough room to have two people seated comfortably with me. I’d never had my own office. Although the space was simply decorated, there was a warmth to it that made me feel at ease, familiar in an unfamiliar way.
The window behind my desk overlooked the carpark, not exactly an inspiring view. But a park in the distance had some children playing, and I found myself smiling, thinking back to Jamie, wondering how he was getting on at school. I took a seat at my desk and spotted a couple of picture frames. Surprisingly, there were more than in my own bedroom.
One was of me, Cat, Mama, and Papa. It looked li
ke it might have been taken in Italy, as my tan glowed, and Cat was darker than I had seen her in a long time. Both of our complexions always took so well to the sun. The second photograph was a picture of me, Jax, and Jamie at some sort of carnival. As I looked at the picture closely, a bright flash passed before my eyes.
“Mum, can we go on the Ferris wheel again?” Jamie asked with his hand in mine as he pinched some pink cotton candy from Jax.
“Again? We already went on it twice,” Jax whined playfully, helping herself to some more cotton candy. “And you know I don’t like heights.”
“I’ll protect you.” He beamed at her before tugging on my hand until I dropped to my knee, meeting him at eye level. “Oh, please, oh, please, can we?” His shimmering green eyes crumbled me like they always did.
“Okay, but this is the last time,” I replied, feeling my heart expand as he jumped with excitement and began running to the nearby Ferris wheel.
“We wouldn’t dream of denying Prince Jamie a royal request,” Jax teased as she pecked me on the cheek, her lips lingering.
“Elena!” A young girl burst through the office door, pulling me from the flashback. My heart rate remained heightened, and my hand still lingered on my cheek from where Jax had kissed me. “Bullocks, I’m so sorry. Are you okay? Did you get lost? Trish on reception was supposed to call me when you got in.” The twentysomething girl spoke at the speed of light, making it difficult to keep up, particularly when my head was still reeling from my flashback. “And then Trish said that Kevin said that Manjit said you were already here, and then I went looking for you, and Mike said he saw you in the kitchen, and then—”
“Tansy, I presume?” I interrupted as she breathed a sigh of relief and nodded. “It’s nice to meet you, well, for me at least. Why don’t you sit?” I suggested as she struggled to carry a small stack of folders.
“Thanks,” she murmured, proceeding to pile the folders onto my desk, knocking over the infamous carnival picture. “Sorry, I just wanted everything to go smoothly today. It’s not every day your boss comes back to work with no idea what’s going on.” She shrugged as I picked up the picture and tried to fix some of the new chaos on the desk. “Not that you don’t know anything. You know stuff. Right? Like, some stuff. You can still speak, right? Because my friend Janice’s cousin once got a glass bottle to the head in this nightclub—Malibu Blue, it’s in Manchester—and he was in the hospital for like two months, and he had to learn—”
“Tansy?”
“Yeah?” she asked, wide-eyed.
“Are you a little nervous?”
“Completely shittin’ it.”
I chuckled. “Me too.” I watched her relax a little. “To be honest, I’m a little out of my depth. Last time I remember being here, I was Trish in reception.”
She nodded. “I know. You’re the one who saved me from reception. Remember?” she said and then corrected herself. “That’s right, you don’t. My bad.” I chuckled as she gave me a reassuring smile. “I wasn’t sure how much you remembered, which is why I made you these.” My gaze followed hers, landing on the coloured folders as she went on to explain, lifting each folder as she spoke. “Green is the projects we are working on right now, in detail. The white folder is a list of the company’s clients and their engagement surveys for the last twelve quarters, along with each presentation summarising the findings. Blue includes the overseas consultancy projects for the last year, our analysis, and the findings. Purple is the company structure, the food chain basically. Directors, employees, our team, who I think you basically met. Chuck and Sam?” I nodded as I watched her in surprise. “And red is a basic background on the company for the past eight years, the usual stuff like the people you like and don’t like, who you eat lunch with, who’s great for office gossip, and who’s a giant asshole to avoid—”
“Tansy?” I interrupted again. “Did you make all this for me?” She nodded as if it was no big deal, despite the folders being full of notes, charts, graphs, and sticky notes. “This must have taken you forever.”
“It did, but you’re a great boss.” She smiled genuinely, and I felt my heart warm a little. “And it can’t be easy for you. I just wanted to help.”
“Thank you. This helps a lot,” I said before she relaxed more into the chair, making herself comfortable.
“How’s home life?” I barely knew her, but I felt like we shared more than just work problems. She had a welcoming aura surrounding her. I could tell she cared about my answer rather than just asking an empty question like an artificial colleague. It was what prompted me to be candid.
“Strange. Everything is new, and I don’t know where things are, and I’m just hoping things will fall back into place but they’re…well, kinda not.” I laughed lightly, even though it was a great concern of mine.
“It will, with time.”
“It’s just taking so long. Longer than I think everyone was expecting.” Disappointing people was one of my biggest fears, but I didn’t voice that.
“At least you have Jax to keep you on track.”
I nodded with a small smile as I thought of my roommate, who had been increasingly consuming my thoughts lately. Her thoughtful gestures of including me in everyday tasks and even intimate occasions like evening meals didn’t go amiss. We clearly were very close, and even her son had been great at helping me adjust to my new life. I didn’t think I would have been coping as well living alone.
“And how’s your little man? Making sure Mummy gets better, I’m sure. He’s such a sweet boy.”
“Wait, what? My little man?” She looked at me as if I had two heads as my heart began to race. “Jamie’s not my son.”
“Oh, my bad,” she said. “Jamie is Jax’s son. I always thought you had him. He looks just like you.” The phone started ringing loudly outside my office. “Sorry, I have to get that. The boys never answer the phone, drives you cray.” She dashed outside to answer the call but not before berating Sam and Chuck.
I sat gobsmacked in my chair. Why on earth would she think Jamie was my son?
* * *
Jax
“Anyone home?” I called as I closed the door behind me before removing my coat and scarf.
“In here,” a sea of voices called.
“And where is here?” I played along, taking off my work shoes and removing my backpack, ignoring the aches in my tired muscles.
“My room, silly,” Jamie called, though I was already going that direction.
When I reached his door, I found Jamie, Abbey, and Kate playing with one of his dollhouses, and a swarm of action figures sprawled out across the floor. To my surprise, Elena was lying on Jamie’s bed with her head resting in her hand, watching them. She smiled, and in that moment, all exhaustion vanished, and I forgot I’d just worked a double shift.
“Hey, girls.” I smiled at the kids before my gaze naturally found its way back to Elena.
“Will you play with us?” Kate asked, giving me her best toothy grin despite missing her front teeth.
“Sure. After I make dinner,” I said before Elena rose to her feet.
“It’s in the oven. I better go check on it.” She made her way toward me. “Girls, make sure to finish your homework before your mum gets here.”
“We will, Auntie Elena,” they sang as she brushed past me and moved to the kitchen. As she passed, her perfume lingered in the air. I couldn’t help but breathe it in. Her scent still did things, even if she was oblivious of the effect it had on me.
“Caterina called earlier and said she couldn’t collect them today,” I said before adding an apology. “I’d no idea she was going to ask you to watch them all afternoon. I’m so sorry. I would have called my mum or tried to get cover if I’d—”
“Jax, it’s cool. It was really nice getting to spend the afternoon with my nieces.” She smiled warmly as she stirred the pot of rice before placing the lid on top. Delicious smells wafted from the oven, and my stomach growled. Elena was always a much better cook.
“Besides, it gave me something to do. All afternoon, I sit about or go for walks or clean or cook. I’m bored out of my mind.” I chuckled as she checked on the curry cooking in the oven. “They won’t even let me log on to my emails outside of work, it’s bullshit.”
“You’ve only been back one week, Elena,” I said, grabbing two beers from the fridge and passing one to her. “How are things at work? Tansy still being a scatterbrain?”
After her first day of work, she’d come home and told me Tansy thought Jamie was her son. I’d almost choked on a mouthful of mashed potatoes. Elena just thought her assistant was a bit of an airhead and got confused, so thankfully, our cover wasn’t blown. I’d called Baker Contracts the following day to explain the situation.
However, as the weeks rolled into months, the guilt at having to continuously deceive and in some cases, blatantly lie, to Elena was becoming unbearable. There were far too many mistakes, and I was struggling to keep track of all the lies. I only agreed to keeping who me and Jamie were a secret in the short-term. Had I known Elena’s memories would still be foggy, I would have never agreed. She deserved to know the truth, and it wasn’t fair on Jamie.
“At least from now on, they’ve agreed to let you work every day, Monday to Friday,” I replied, squashing those thoughts.
“For three and a half hours.” Elena tutted before taking a gulp of beer. “I’m not allowed to work past lunch. I was still in my office today at one p.m., and Kim called security.” I tried to hide my laughter, but it only seemed to frustrate her more. “It’s not funny, Jax.” She whipped the tea towel playfully at me, causing me to raise my hands in surrender.
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