Pillar of Light

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Pillar of Light Page 297

by Gerald N. Lund


  Nathan nodded. He pulled out one of the two simple chairs in front of the table and sat down. “I know this is not the best time, Will, that you need your sleep, but I don’t know what’s going to happen once your father knows I’m here. Maybe he won’t let me stay.”

  Will took the other chair and sat down across from him. He considered lighting the lamp, but decided against it. They could see each other well enough in the moonlight through the window. “All right. But if you’re going to tell me that what I did was stupid, you may as well save your breath. I know that. I’ve kicked myself a hundred times for losing my temper.”

  “You’re not the only one at fault here,” Nathan answered. “And it’s not just you and your decision to be baptized that caused it. This whole thing with your mother and . . . well, I don’t need to tell you all that.”

  “I know.”

  Nathan shook his head slowly. “You know part of it, Will, but there are some other things you need to hear. I’m glad you told me what you said to your father about Jessica and Rachel.”

  “I shouldn’t have said those things to him,” Will cut in morosely. Then suddenly he flared. “But darn it, Nathan! Jessica used to be his wife. Rachel is his child. It’s not right that he just pretend that she’s not.”

  “Will, I want you to listen for a minute. You may not agree with it. I’m not even sure I do. But that doesn’t matter. What’s important is that you see into your father’s heart.”

  “Yes.” Will sat back, his demeanor very subdued.

  “Good.” Nathan took a deep breath, then let it out in a long, weary sigh. “I’m not going to go into all of what happened in the past. You already know that. I think you also understand that when your father was reunited with the family it created a very awkward situation between him and Jessica and Rachel.”

  “Yes. I know all that, but—”

  Nathan’s hand came up, cutting him off. “Maybe it wasn’t the best choice. I’ve asked myself many times what I would do. I’m not sure. But his choice was not made out of selfishness or because he didn’t care, Will. That’s all I’m trying to help you see. You may fault him on his wisdom, but you can’t fault him on his intentions.

  “Did you know that your father risked his life to go into Haun’s Mill and get Jessica and Rachel out?”

  “I knew he went in, but he had the militia with him.”

  “The militia had specific orders not to help the Saints in any way. Your pa was under the gravest of danger when he disobeyed that order. Did you know that your father paid for Jessica’s house here in Nauvoo?”

  “Yes, but he helped everybody else too.”

  “That’s right, but he didn’t just help Jessica, Will. He paid for it. The rest of us have tried to pay at least some of that back. He wouldn’t let Jessica pay him anything.”

  Nathan bored in relentlessly now. “Did you know that some of the money from Jessica’s students came from your father?”

  Will’s head came up. “What?”

  “That’s right. Joshua hired some men at the freight yard specifically with the understanding that with the wages he paid them they would enroll their children in her school. It was a way of getting cash to her without making her feel like she was on charity.”

  One hand came up and Will began to rub slowly at his eyes. “No, I didn’t know that,” he said softly.

  “And there’s one other thing. I just learned this a few days before I left to come here. Jessica’s engaged to be married again.”

  “No!” Will exclaimed. “Really?”

  Nathan nodded, watching him steadily now.

  “To whom?”

  “To Solomon Garrett.”

  “That schoolteacher guy who asked her to come to Ramus?”

  “The same.”

  “But that’s wonderful!”

  “Yes, it is, Will. And do you remember how that whole thing came about? Somebody told Garrett about Jessica and he came over to watch her teach. He was so impressed, he offered her that position in Ramus.”

  “Yes, Mother told me all about that.”

  Nathan was silent for a moment; then very quietly he asked, “Would you care to guess who it was that told Solomon Garrett that he ought to come and see Jessica Griffith’s school?”

  “Who?” Will started, then suddenly he reared back. “No!” he said again.

  Nathan nodded slowly. “I’m not positive, but when I asked Solomon who had told him about Jessica’s school, he said that a teamster was passing through Ramus and delivered an anonymous letter to him telling him all about her. He can’t remember the name of the teamster, but he remembers the name of the freight company.”

  “Pa’s?” Will asked in a whisper.

  “Exactly.”

  Now Will dropped his head into his hands. “And I said those horrible things about him not caring.”

  Nathan reached across and laid a hand on his shoulder. “What’s done is done, Will. But I felt that if you understood, if you knew what had been in his heart, whether you agree that it was right or not, it would be a first step to making things right again.”

  Will looked up in anguish. “What do I say to him?”

  “Nothing. Not yet. When the time is right, just understanding him will help you know what to do.”

  Nathan stood. “Now, let’s go to bed. I’m exhausted. You’re exhausted. And there’s still your father to deal with in the morning. And I don’t think he’s going to be very happy to see me.”

  When Joshua looked up and saw Nathan and Will entering the dining room together, he nearly dropped his fork. But there wasn’t much of a chance to do any more than that. Nathan had been well liked during his stay in Joshua’s camp, and he was warmly greeted by the crew. Jean Claude and Will eventually brought him over to sit across the table from Joshua, who smiled with forced warmth. “This is a surprise,” he said. “Didn’t you get my letter?”

  “Yeah, it came an hour or two before I left. But I was all packed by then, so . . .” He smiled. “So here I am.”

  Frenchie clapped Nathan on the shoulder. “Well, we could have done it without you, but it’s always good to have another man on rafts as big as we’re going to have.”

  “Oh,” Nathan said, turning to look at the camp foreman, “that reminds me. I bring you greetings from Patrick McDonnell.”

  “McDonnell!” the Frenchman cried. “Where did you meet that old bundle of gristle?”

  And they were off as Nathan began to tell them about his experience in Prairie du Chien. After listening for a few moments, Joshua finished the last of his cup of coffee and stood. Nathan glanced up at him but Joshua didn’t return his look. He moved to the door and started out. Then he paused, turning his head. “We’ve got some rafts to build, men,” he said. “Let’s not be spending the morning chawing on a piece of rawhide.”

  Ten minutes later the door to Joshua’s office opened and Nathan stepped inside. Joshua didn’t seem at all surprised and finished making an entry in the journal that kept the daily record of cuttings before he looked up. “You really did take me by surprise, little brother.”

  “I thought I would.” Nathan came over and sat down on a chair beside him.

  “If you got my letter, why did you still come?”

  Nathan had expected that to be one of the first questions he would be asked and he had thought about it all the way up. There was only danger in trying to play games with Joshua in this matter, so he answered honestly. “I also got a letter from Will that same day. He told me everything. Then I knew why you were telling me not to come.”

  Joshua sat back, putting the tips of his fingers together and making a steeple with his hands. “So,” he mused, “you jumped on a horse and came up to save us from each other?”

  “Something like that,” Nathan smiled.

  There was no answering smile, not even a grunt.

  “Joshua, I—”

  “You’re not needed, Nathan. This is none of your affair.”

  “Oh, I see,�
�� Nathan said. He had thought through this conversation too, so with just a touch of asperity in his voice he went on quickly. “If your boy falls in the river you want me to be there. Any other problem, it’s none of my affair.”

  If the shot hit its mark, Joshua gave no sign.

  “I’m not here to take sides against you, Joshua, in spite of what you think. I’m here to—”

  “What time did you get in last night?” Joshua cut in bluntly.

  “About eleven.”

  “Why didn’t you come and wake me up?”

  Nathan shrugged. “It was late. When I was here before, I always slept with Will. I thought waking you could wait till morning.”

  “So you two lay awake all night talking religion and moaning about Will’s wicked father.”

  Nathan slowly shook his head. “Wrong on both counts. Actually, I don’t think the subject of religion was even mentioned.”

  “You didn’t talk at all about his decision to become a Mormon?”

  “Not a word.”

  Joshua’s eyes were dark and brooding and there was no mistaking the suspicion in them. Nathan went on evenly. “Nor did we spend the night rehashing your battle.”

  “So you just came in, shook hands, said your prayers, and went to bed.” Now the derision was open and contemptuous. “Or maybe you discussed the going price of lumber down south, eh?”

  “No, we talked for about ten minutes. We talked about the family. I told him the news.”

  “What news?”

  “Solomon Garrett has asked Jessica to marry him. With a little help from Father Steed, Jessica accepted.”

  For the first time there was a softening. “Really?”

  “Yes. We’re all very pleased. She seems very happy.”

  “That is good news.” Then immediately the stiffness was back. “Does Caroline know about this whole thing between Will and me?”

  “Yes. Will asked me to give his letter to her after I finished reading it.”

  Joshua shook his head, staring at the table top. “Welcome home,” he muttered to no one in particular.

  “You might be surprised.”

  Suddenly Joshua sat straight up. “Did Carl talk to you before you left?”

  Nathan gave him a quizzical look. “Well, I didn’t see Carl on the day I left, but he was at the family dinner three nights before where we honored Solomon and Jessica.”

  “But he didn’t say anything about—” He caught himself and shook his head. “Never mind. If he had, you’d know what I was talking about.”

  “What?”

  “It’s nothing. It can wait until we get back to Nauvoo.”

  Nathan saw a chance to move to safer ground. “Which is how soon?”

  Joshua shrugged. “The river’s running high right now, which will save us lots of grief with the rapids. Jean Claude figures it will take about ten rafts to get it all down to La Crosse. Then we’ll put them together into three or four platforms there. We’ve got four of the ten done, another one nearly so. We’re hoping we can be on our way by next Monday.”

  “Monday! That’s great. Then I got here just in time.”

  Joshua stood. “Let’s go take a look.”

  Nathan stood too. Joshua started around him, then stopped and gave him a warning glare. “I appreciate you coming back up to help, Nathan. I do. But this isn’t the time for meddling. Will and I are going to have to work this out between us, but we need to do it in our own way. Understood?”

  “Understood. I didn’t come up here to take over your role as father, Joshua.”

  “Good,” he grunted. “I wasn’t looking for a replacement.”

  They walked out together and started down the path that led to the sawmill. Nathan watched his brother out of the corner of his eye, but if Joshua was aware of the scrutiny he didn’t show any sign of it. As they approached the clearing where the sawmill had been constructed, Nathan steeled himself and spoke. “Joshua?”

  There was a murmured grunt.

  “There’s something you need to consider.”

  There was a sudden icy glint in Joshua’s eyes. Nathan flinched a little, knowing this wasn’t going to lessen the strain between them but knowing also that it needed saying. “You say you’re not looking for someone to replace you as Will’s father.”

  “That’s right.” It came out in clipped, hard words. “So don’t you be volunteering.”

  “Then maybe you’d better ask yourself why it is that Will shares his innermost feelings with me and with Jean Claude but not you. You don’t know what he thinks about Jenny. You don’t know why he decided to join the Church. You don’t know what he’s feeling about you. In other words, you have no idea what’s in that boy’s heart, Joshua, and that’s part of being his father too.”

  Joshua stopped, the fury rising in his eyes.

  Nathan met it calmly. “Sorry, big brother. But that’s something you need to think about, like it or not.” And with that, he turned and walked on, leaving Joshua to stare balefully after him.

  Chapter Notes

  The great rafts of logs or lumber shipped to growing markets for building materials via the rivers of America are one of the little known aspects of our heritage. Masts and spars for the shipbuilding industry were a major export from the New England states, and people from those states perfected many of the rafting techniques described here. It is reported that along the Delaware River, which flowed out of the Catskills in New York State into Delaware Bay, there were as many as a thousand rafts going downriver each spring and summer. Huge rafts carrying as much as 150,000 board feet of lumber in a single chain became a common sight along the Mississippi as well during the early 1840s. The Wisconsin pineries—or “the Pine Woods,” as the Saints often called them—became a major self-support effort of the Nauvoo Saints and proved to be a valuable source of lumber for the temple, the Nauvoo House, and other construction needs in the burgeoning city. (See Eric Sloane, A Museum of Early American Tools [New York: Ballantine Books, 1964], pp. 42–45; Dennis Rowley, “The Mormon Experience in the Wisconsin Pineries, 1841–1845,” BYU Studies 32 [Winter and Spring 1992]: 136–37.)

  Chapter 21

  I’ll be working at the quarry today.”

  Melissa, at the stove, turned around slowly, the surprise obvious on her face.

  Carl’s head was down and he was working on cutting his ham and eggs with studied intensity. “Your father mentioned they’re behind on getting the rock up to the temple site because they don’t have enough teams.”

  “I thought you were taking that load of bricks out to the Morley settlement this morning.”

  He popped a generous forkful of ham, eggs, and fried potatoes into his mouth and began to chew. “That can wait until tomorrow, I reckon.”

  Melissa pushed the pan back to a cooler part of the stove and came over to sit across the table from him. “Did Papa ask you if you’d help out?”

  “No, he just mentioned in passing that they were short.”

  “I see,” she responded. She hadn’t thought her family would make that request of him, and so it pleased her all the more that he was doing this on his own.

  “Melissa?”

  “Yes?”

  “I do want to help out at the quarry. That’s my main reason for going, but it may give me a chance to talk to people too.”

  She gave him a quizzical look; then a moment later she understood. He meant that he would talk to people concerning John Bennett and his wild stories. “I think that’s good, Carl. Are you ever going to tell me what you’re learning?” She had bitten her tongue more than once, trying to be patient until he felt it was right.

  He sighed heavily. “Yes, of course. And I’ll tell you now if you want. But I don’t have all the answers. I’d really like to wait until I do. That is, if you’re sure you want to hear it.”

  “Why wouldn’t I?”

  “It’s not pleasant stuff. It’s ugly, twisted, vicious. It’s like taking poison for your mind.”

  Me
lissa nodded. And what was this doing to her husband’s feelings about the Church? After all, Joshua wasn’t the only one who needed worrying about. “I’m sure some of this is coming from our enemies. Is there any danger in hearing only one side of the story?”

  There was a moment’s silence, then a touch of reproof in his voice. “Joshua sent Bennett to me because Joshua thinks I will be fair-minded. Do you think I am a fair-minded man, Melissa?”

  She was instantly contrite. She came over and stood beside him. “Yes, of course. I’m sorry, Carl.” She bent over and kissed him on his forehead. “I have complete faith in you. And I’m glad you’ll be talking to people at the quarry too.”

  He finished the last piece of ham, then stood up. “Kiss the children for me when they wake up.”

  “I will.”

  “Well, well. Good morning, Carl.”

  “Good morning, Israel.”

  “Where you off to this morning?”

  Trying to appear nonchalant, Carl clucked softly to his team, pulling on the reins. He turned them off the road and pulled them in alongside Israel Barlow’s wagon and team. “To be honest, I heard you might need some help hauling rock. I’ve got a free day, so here I am.”

  Israel gave him a long, appraising look, then smiled. “That’s right decent of you to do that. We are running quite a bit behind.”

  “Then what are you doing sitting up here?” Carl asked chidingly. “Why aren’t you down in the quarry loading up?” They were up on the bluff above the stone quarry. Some of the bluffs lining the river were made of limestone. The quarry was being cut into the face of one of those bluffs. Across the road and about fifteen yards beyond, the ground sloped and then suddenly disappeared. That was the edge of the quarry. About thirty feet below that was where the men were blasting and cutting the great stone blocks for the temple walls.

  Barlow ignored the good-natured dig. “You’re so anxious, you drive on down there. About the time you get your team backed into place, they’ll set off that black powder and then you’ll have your hands full.”

  “Oh,” Carl said meekly. “So that’s it. How soon?”

  “About ten more minutes, they said. And that was five or six minutes ago. They’re the ones who suggested it might be well to wait up here.”

 

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