by S. E. Smith
“No,” Makayla burst out in denial. “No, I need to come back to Tampa. I mean, it is my senior year. All of my friends are there and I have already planned out what I was going to do in school this year. Plus, Laura said she could get me a job down at the Smoothie place. I’ll be working and going to school, so you’ll barely know I’m there.”
Makayla stopped and grabbed one of the posts holding up the porch. Her fingers curled around the ornate metal as she waited for her mom to speak. They belonged together, couldn’t her mom see that? Yes, they’d had a rough time of it the last couple of years, but things would be different. They had Henry’s help now.
“I… I need time, Makayla,” Teresa finally said. “I have to find myself.”
Bitterness threatened to choke Makayla as she listened to her mom’s excuses as to why she needed Makayla to stay here with Henry. None of them mattered. As far as Makayla was concerned, they were all just excuses to tell her the same thing she had told her in the hospital… Her mom didn’t want to be a mom anymore. She was tired of having Makayla around.
“You will hardly know I’m there,” Makayla protested in a bitter voice. “I’ll be working and going to school. I can hang out with my friends, or even get a second job. I won’t get in your way, I promise.”
“It’s not that, Makayla,” Teresa whispered in a tired voice. “I’ve met someone. I want to see where this goes before….”
“Is it Rob?” Makayla demanded, letting go of the post and clenching her fist. “Are you back with him and the drugs? Is that why you don’t want me anymore?”
“No! No, I’m clean and Rob doesn’t know where I am,” her mom insisted. “It’s… It’s someone else. He’s different, Makayla. I just need time. I need you to stay with dad until I know what I’m doing. You don’t deserve to go through my screw ups anymore. You deserve a normal life. I’ve been a rotten mom, I know that. I… I just need time.”
Makayla didn’t say anything for several seconds. Her mind and heart rejected her mom’s excuses. Deep down, all she could think was her mom didn’t want to deal with her anymore. Swallowing down the bitter acid taste from the orange juice, she stared blindly at the road as Henry’s old blue truck pulled up out front.
“Henry’s back from the grocery store,” Makayla said in a dull voice. “I’ve got to help him get the groceries in.”
“Please understand,” Teresa begged. “I’ll call you soon. You’ll do fine. You’ll make new friends. It will be a fresh start for you… for both of us. I love you, honey.”
“Love you, too,” Makayla said automatically as the line went silent. “But, I’m not the one who needed the fresh start. I just needed you.”
Makayla slowly slid the phone into her back pocket. Henry glanced up at her, a look of concern on his face. She pulled on the mask of calm that she hid behind. Forcing a smile to her lips, she walked down the steps.
“You okay?” Henry asked, glancing at her again when she reached for several bags.
“Sure,” she replied with a shrug. “This looks like a lot of canned goods.”
“They go on the Defiance,” Henry said. “I was thinking it might be nice to take her on a bit longer trip.”
“Really?” Makayla asked in surprise. “Where?”
“I thought it would be nice to sail down to the Keys for a few days,” he said, slamming the back of the tailgate closed. “What do you think?”
Makayla looked out at the sleek sailboat. “When? You know school starts next week, don’t you? I….” Her voice faded when Henry grunted.
“Well, damn,” he said in disappointment. “When is your first break?”
“I don’t know,” she said, looking down at the heavy bags in her hands. “I thought you’d be taking me back to Tampa this weekend, but…” She looked up and drew in a deep breath. “But, mom said she thought it might be best if I stay here a little while longer. Maybe I can just drop out, you know, it isn’t that big a deal anymore. I could get my GED, instead.”
“NO!” Henry growled with a severe frown. “You aren’t dropping out of school. I’ll talk to Jason. He’s got kids in school. He’ll know what to do. We’ll get you enrolled in high school here. It can’t be all that difficult. Parents move all the time,” he said with a shrug. “We’ll just plan on taking the Defiance down on your next long break if the weather is good. It’s no big deal.”
Makayla watched as Henry turned on his heel and walked down the dock. She bit her lip and stared at his retreating back. Finally releasing a sigh of resignation, she followed him. Maybe her mom would change her mind. Maybe Henry would change his.
And maybe there really was a tooth fairy, she thought sarcastically to herself.
*.*.*
A week later, Makayla was wishing that there were such things as fairy godmothers and magical wishes as she stood in the office at Westwood High School. She stumbled forward when another group of students walked down the narrow corridor. There was nowhere to sit and barely any room to stand as she waited for a guidance counselor.
Henry had signed her up two days ago. The front receptionist had been overworked, trying to process the people waiting with the ringing phone. Another woman had come out to help, but she was even more harried than the other. The woman had shot out instructions so fast that Henry had growled for her to slow down. The exasperated look hadn’t been lost on Henry, neither had his temper.
“Next,” a tall, slender woman with thick, black hair and a tired smile called. “Makayla Summerlin.”
Makayla pushed away from the wall that she had been holding up for over an hour and stepped forward. Almost immediately, she had to back up again as three girls came down the hall. The tallest one pushed into her with a muttered curse.
“Ms. Hemmings, you need to slow down and get to class,” the counselor scolded as the three girls rounded the corner. “Makayla, come on in.”
Makayla rubbed her arm where the girl had hit her and nodded. She adjusted her backpack and stepped into the small, cramped room. She almost moaned when she saw that all the chairs were filled with files.
“Your files were faxed over this morning,” Mrs. Lambert said. “It looks like most of your prerequisites are out of the way. I’ll place you in Advanced Biology, Advanced Trig and Algebra, and a Creative Writing course for your elective. Based on your Standardized test scores, you might want to consider taking a few classes at the college. If you had enrolled sooner, I could have gotten you into dual enrollment. It looks like you were doing that at your last school. I can get you the paperwork and they may still be able to enroll you in some of the online courses before the drop/add period is up next week.”
“Okay, thanks,” she mumbled, glancing out the door at the group of students. “Do you have any other classes that I can take other than Creative Writing? I did one already as a freshmen.”
Mrs. Lambert shook her head. “No, with your current classes,” she said, reaching for the paper that was printing. “If you’ve already had something similar, this will go toward one of your humanities classes. It should be easy. Mrs. Moore is a great teacher.”
“I was hoping to get a foreign language class,” Makayla argued. “They offered German at my other school. I’ve had three years. This would have been my fourth.”
Mrs. Lambert stood up and handed Makayla the paper she was holding. She smiled down at her, but Makayla could tell that the counselor was already thinking of her next student. A frown creased her brow when she saw that she also had gym.
“I’ve already had gym,” Makayla said in frustration. “I shouldn’t have to take it again.”
“We don’t offer German and gym is another one of your electives. Next,” Mrs. Lambert said, practically pushing Makayla out of her office. “If you still don’t like the schedule after things calm down in a few weeks, come back and see me. Aaron Pierce!”
Makayla jerked out of the way as a huge boy pushed by her. Gripping her schedule in her hand, she stared blindly down at it. She had no idea where
any of her classes were, where the gym was, or even the cafeteria. Panic swelled inside her as she rounded the corner. Today was going to be a very, very, very long day.
Chapter 14
“How’s school going?” Henry asked three weeks later.
Makayla looked up from the bowl of soup she was playing with and shrugged. “Okay, I guess,” she mumbled, taking a bite of the creamy tomato concoction.
“That’s good, I guess,” he muttered. “Do you have any homework?”
She shook her head. She did, but it wasn’t anything important. The last three weeks had been… difficult. She had returned to the guidance counselor’s office twice more in the hopes of changing her classes. The only good news she had was starting in the Spring semester, she would be taking the German class she wanted at the college. The bad thing was that she was still stuck in Creative Writing and Gym until then.
“Did you get that part for the Defiance that you were wanting?” She asked, breaking her grilled cheese sandwich apart and dipping it in the soup. “It was for the jib’s winch, right?”
“Yeah, the tension spring,” Henry said. “Jason and I installed it today. Do you want to go out this weekend?”
“Sure,” she replied with a sigh. “Mom seems to be doing good.”
Henry nodded. “Yes, the doctors at the clinic where she works seem to like her. She was promoted to patient intake,” he said.
Makayla looked up at him in surprise. She knew about her mom’s promotion, but she didn’t know that Henry did, as well. The frown on her face faded when she remembered that his friend was keeping an eye on her mom and must have told Henry about it.
“She said she’s seeing someone, too,” she added. “She won’t tell me anything about him, though. I hope he isn’t a jerk like Rob.”
“He’s not,” Henry replied with a small grin.
Makayla dropped the remains of her sandwich on her plate and looked at Henry with a suspicious gaze. “What aren’t you telling me, old man?” She asked, staring at him.
Henry dropped a piece of his sandwich over the side of the table for Breaker. The Akita was staring at their plates with an intense, alert expression. Makayla’s lips twitched when the Akita snapped it out of the air. She doubted Breaker even tasted it. He licked his lips and looked at her with a hopeful expression. Releasing an exasperated sigh, she picked up a piece from her plate and dropped it as well.
“When are you going to call me grandpa?” Henry asked instead. “I don’t need reminding that I’m getting old.”
“Do you know who she is seeing, Henry?” Makayla asked, ignoring his question.
“Yeah, I know,” he responded, picking up his spoon again. “I told you I had a friend that lived over there named Arnie, didn’t I?”
“Yes,” she said, leaning forward. “You said he was the manager of the condo where she is living.”
“That’s right,” Henry said with a nod. “He and I have been friends for about ten years now. We met when he lived in the house where Brian’s parents live now. He liked to go out on the sailboat and do some fishing. To make a long story short, he moved to Tampa, took a job with the police department, and got married. He and his wife divorced about five years ago. Ellen decided that she was happier with the guy that owned the boat next to them at the time. Arnie bought a condo in the newly renovated section near the waterfront after his divorce. It looked like a good investment, so I bought a condo there, too, and have been renting it out until recently.”
“Okay, what does Arnie watching my mom have to do with…,” Makayla’s eyes widened as she finally realized why Henry was grinning. “She’s seeing Arnie.”
“Yep,” Henry said, dipping his sandwich into the soup and taking a bite. “He’s a good man. He’ll be good for her.”
*.*.*
After dinner, Makayla told Henry she had some reading to do. She helped him wash the dishes and dry them before she headed up the stairs. Henry said he would be on the Defiance.
She climbed the stairs, used the bathroom and brushed her teeth before changing into a pair of pajama bottoms and an oversized T-shirt. Walking back across the hall to her room, she settled down on her bed with her backpack. She quickly finished the math assignment she had and read the chapter on Journalism that had been assigned for her writing class.
Stuffing all the books back into her bag, she slid off the bed and set it on the chair by the door for the next morning. She decided while she was up to go ahead and lay out her clothes for the next day. It was easier than trying to decide what to wear when she was still half asleep. Once she was done, she walked back over to the bed and picked up the book on nautical charts. It wasn’t the most fun book in the world to read, but she was finding it interesting to see if she could read the charts and understand how to use the stars as a guide.
One of the things she found helpful was going out on the Defiance at night with Henry. They had only done it a few times, but it had been an amazing, if not a little scary, adventure. He had told her the best way to understand the charts were to actually use them to navigate. She quickly discovered that Henry was an amateur astronomer. After being out on the water at night, far off shore, she had a better appreciation for the fact that all sailors, both modern and those from generations before, needed to have a basic understanding of the stars.
She knew the Big Dipper and Orion’s Belt, but even those had been hard to see in the ambient light from the city. Out here on the river, it was a little easier to see, even with the lights from the other houses and the condos across the water. But, out at sea, they were unlike anything that she had ever seen before. To say the sky looked totally different would have been an understatement, it had been like living on another world. She had just started the sixth chapter when she felt her phone vibrate. Glancing at the screen, she sighed when she saw that it was Debbie. Picking it up, she slid her finger over the connect button.
“Hey, Deb,” Makayla said in a distracted voice, trying to read at the same time as she talked. “How are you doing?”
“Hey, Makayla,” Debbie said. “Missing you. What are you doing? You sound distracted.”
Makayla sighed and pushed the book away as she leaned back against the headboard of her bed. “Just reading a book on nautical charts. It’s interesting, but a bit confusing. What about you?”
“Hiding from my parents,” Debbie laughed. “They are already going through colleges they want me to attend. How’s school going?”
“Okay,” Makayla started to say before she grimaced. “Not that good. There are these three girls there who have decided I’m the scum of the earth and are giving me a hard time, I’m in another writing class and gym, which I don’t need, and I… I just don’t feel like I fit in anywhere anymore,” she reluctantly admitted. “I’m seriously thinking of dropping out.”
“Gawd, my parents would kill me if I even mentioned that,” Debbie said. “I’m ready to go to college just to get away from them. What about your mom? Can’t you come back here? We’d love to have you back with us. Laura, Audrey, and I all have the same history class. Tisha opted for American History instead of World History. She’s kicking herself in the butt now.”
Makayla bent her head and drew her knees up. She could hear the laughter in Debbie’s voice. She wasn’t surprised by Debbie’s feelings toward her parents. She’d probably feel the same way if she had someone micro-managing her life all the time. She listened as Debbie talked about some of the kids in the classroom and about what the other girls were up to. Tisha had gotten a job at the Smoothie place, and she and Laura had been arguing more because Tisha wanted to flirt more than work.
There was a sound of knocking in the background and then Debbie groaned. Makayla heard her muffled words as she told her mom that she had finished her homework and wouldn’t be on the phone for much longer. A minute later, Debbie released another sigh.
“I’ve got to go,” she muttered. “My parents are driving me crazy!” She hissed. “Miss you loads, Makayla. Ha
ng in there, maybe we will get to go to the same college.”
“That would be nice,” Makayla responded, feeling more homesick than ever. “Good luck with your folks and tell the others I said hello.”
“I will,” Debbie said. “Hugs!”
“Hugs,” Makayla whispered.
She ended the call and leaned her head back against the headboard, staring up blindly at the ceiling. After a few minutes, she turned off the lamp next to her bed and set the book she had been reading on the nightstand. She scooted down and pulled the covers over her.
Staring out the window at the twinkling lights across the river, she listened as the front door opened and closed. A minute later, her bedroom door creaked open before closing again. A small, sad smile curved her lips when she felt Breaker jump up onto the bed next to her and lay down with his chin on her upper thigh. Instinctively, her right hand moved down to pet him.
“I don’t know what I’m going to do, Breaker,” she whispered in the dark. “Sometimes, I want to just go away where no one can find me.”
The feel of Breaker’s warm tongue against her hand brought tears to her eyes. She felt lost and alone with no place to turn. Her mom didn’t want her, Henry just had her there because he knew she didn’t have anywhere else to go, and Brian… Her mind shied away from him. He had texted her a couple of times, but she hadn’t replied.
Turning her face into the pillow, she tried to shut out all the feelings threatening to overwhelm her. It felt like there was a volcano building inside her, ready to explode. What scared her was not knowing what would happen if it did. Would she go off the deep end like her mom? Would she turn to drugs and bad relationships to ease the pain, or worse…? Sometimes she felt like her very existence was a mistake. Maybe the world would be a better place without her in it. Life around her would go on whether she was there or not. Even her friends wouldn’t really miss her. Bitter tears overflowed as darker thoughts filled her head, drowning her in their thick negative energy. Once started, she felt the black ooze pouring around her like tar, dragging her further down into its sticky pool.