Pretend You’re Mine

by Black, Natasha L.

  My mouth twisted. Well, if he thought it was going to work, then he was wrong. Dead wrong.

  “You know what? Never mind. It has nothing to do with me or Naomi. I have to go now, Papa.” I started back to the box.

  He caught me by the coat sleeve. “But Xander…”

  I broke myself free. “Some of us take our wedding vows more seriously than others,” I snapped.

  That got him quiet. Although, as I strode back into the box, I reflected that it wasn’t entirely true. I’d gotten married for the sole purpose of misleading my family, and now…

  Now what? I didn’t have time to answer that question, to think about what Naomi and I were becoming. Nor did I want to.

  17

  Naomi

  It had been at least ten minutes since they had left the box. I had also noticed that besides Xander and Alliana, Zander’s father was also missing. What did that mean? Were Xander and Alliana now happily reunited and his father was helping convince him to end our marriage? Did I really care?

  Shit, of course I did. I was in big trouble here and I had no idea how to get out of it.

  Part of me wanted to just storm out, tell Xander to go fuck himself, and file the annulment papers on my own. Another part of me wanted to vomit at the mere thought. What had I gone and gotten myself into?

  A moment later, Alliana returned to the box alone, and I felt immediate and annoying relief. I studied her from under my lashes for a moment. She really was remarkably beautiful.

  I sighed, swirling my ice cubes around my drink. While I’d never thought of myself as unattractive, there was attractive and then there was the kind of attractive that put you on the front of a Victoria’s Secret Magazine. She had that, I didn’t.

  And the way she was talking to everyone... Maybe it was my own fault for skulking here in the corner, searching for my third cocktail, but the way Alliana was chatting easily to just about every member of Xander’s family, it seemed like she fit in with them much more than I did.

  A minute or so later, Xander was back, storming in with his father following him, both of them looking pissed. I started toward him, but Alliana was closer and reached him first. As soon as whatever magic started spurting out of her mouth, she lifted her hand and placed it firmly on his chest. What. The. Hell.

  This may just be an arrangement with Xander, but she didn’t know that. That was my fake husband she was flirting with.

  My grip tightened on my cocktail and I downed it. No matter how pissed I was with her, I was equally pissed with Xander not immediately removing that hussy’s hand from his body. The nerve of the two of them had me seeing absolute red. I was shaking so hard I thought I might break the glass in my grip.

  He was the one who was so desperate for the stupid fake marriage that he refused to give me an annulment until we fooled his family. He was the one who kept coming up with reasons to spend time with me. And now he was the one letting another woman touch him in an intimate gesture in front of his whole fucking family? I was fuming, and I wasn’t sure that I wasn’t going to lose my shit right then and there.

  I decided to take refuge in the bathroom, walking there with my head held high, not looking at anyone. In the stall there, I called up Teren, but there was no response. There was nothing to do but go to the sink and put some cold water on my face. I eyed my miserable-looking reflection.

  Xander had promised to make this as easy on me as possible. No way I was I going to stand by and play the part of the rejected jealous wife while he did whatever the hell he wanted. Even if our marriage was a sham.

  As I strode back toward the private theatre box, weaving past people who looked as happy as I’d been this morning, I made a promise to myself. If I found Xander flirting back with Alliana or any other kind of bullshit going on, I’d leave. No word to anyone. Xander could think of some excuse for me leaving since this whole fake marriage thing was his stupid idea. I deserved better than to be stuck here and see that.

  Around the corner from their private box, I paused. Then, making sure that no one was around, I peered around the corner to look for a moment.

  Xander and Alliana were standing nearby, so I could see them clearly, side-by-side, talking quite animatedly. It was so casual, the way Alliana’s hand flitted to his. Xander jerked back, as though he’d been scalded. Next thing I knew, he was storming off right past me, his head roving around. He headed to the bathroom, and I followed after him, catching him by the arm.

  “Naomi,” he said, clearly surprised. “I was coming to look for you. I thought you might be in the bathroom.”

  “I was,” I said. “I thought I’d give you some time with your old ‘friend’,” I said, making air quotes around the word.

  Xander’s brows lowered. “There is absolutely nothing going on with myself and Alliana. Nothing.” His upper lip curled with distaste. “My father’s business partners with her father. He ordered me to be polite.”

  “And that’s it?” I said.

  It was written all over Xander’s face that it wasn’t, but he grabbed my hand. “I’m sorry.”

  “So that’s it,” I said. “You’re not going to tell me what happened when the three of you left the box?”

  Xander’s lips quirked to the side, his gaze softening when it stopped on me. “No I’m not, because nothing happened. Nothing of any importance anyway. My father is a bully and an ass. Let’s just leave it at that and try to have some fun.” He reached out and took my hand, leading me back into the box.

  Back inside, most of his family was seating themselves in preparation for the show. Still, Xander managed to snag us a spot on the opposite side of box from Alliana. Before I knew it, his hand was in mine, and the lights dimmed. He kept holding my hand, even though no one could see it now.

  As we watched, and the arrays of colorful Shen Yun dancers filled the stage, we sunk together further. I couldn’t tell why I was smiling in the dark – if it was because of the vibrant show taking place on the stage before me, or if it had more to do with the man whose hand was in mine.

  18

  Xander

  After Shen Yun, Naomi had been pleased enough to smile and let me whisk her out of the box. She was apparently not appeased enough to agree to another date, citing ‘errands’, which was fair enough if that were true. I dropped her off at her place and walked her to her door, apologizing again for my father and his poor manners.

  I woke the next morning to the phone ringing. My first instinct was to let it do just that. I didn’t particularly want to speak to anyone. I wanted to stay in bed, to sleep, to shut the world out for a little bit and try and figure out what the fuck was wrong with me. I didn’t want to admit that I wanted Naomi to stay. And I couldn’t stop disappointing and confusing her. At this point, if she spit in my face and never spoke to me again, I would deserve it. One hundred percent. I groaned out loud as the insistent caller rang back a third time. By then, I knew who it was.

  “Xander!” Papa said. “We’re all waiting for you.”

  I highly doubted that, although all I could muster was a weak, “Why?”

  Right now, I could barely prop one eye open. Last night, instead of going to bed like a reasonable person, I’d stayed up late watching The Shining.

  Now, over the phone Papa had been saying something, but I’d missed all of it, so he settled on, “See you soon!”

  This was when I cut in. “I can’t make it Papa.”

  A disapproving silence, then, “Why not?”

  My still sleep-squinted-gaze made the rounds of my room. There was no immediate reason in sight, other than Walter who was definitely due for a walk.

  “I have plans,” I said finally, hanging up.

  I sat there for a moment, going through different things to do before deciding. Whatever I chose, I’d need to do my morning rituals – the whole brush teeth, put on clothes and walk Walter thing.

  As I autopolited through them, my mind went back to Papa’s unexpected call and my abrupt response.
/>   Maybe I’d been a bit of a dick, but I was tired of my family assuming that I’d drop whatever plans I had at a moment’s notice to be with them. Not to mention that their idea of ‘family time’ was shoving a woman in my face that they thought was more appropriate than the one I’d married. Assholes.

  Once I’d brushed my teeth, eaten, and given Walter a good thirty-minute walk, I came home. I opened the door, filled with a lazy sort of satisfaction. This was my Sunday. No work, no family, no nothing. For the first time in as long as I could remember, I had a day entirely to myself.

  I strode into my room like the Trojans marching to Troy and sat myself down in my favorite armchair. Beside it, lay the Jack Reacher book I hadn’t managed to start since I’d picked it up at Border’s almost half a year ago. Well, now I could.

  Picking it up though, I felt my gaze drawn to the TV remote. Although reaching for that didn’t feel right either. The longer I sat, the more I found my hand inching to my phone irresistibly.

  I scowled. I just couldn’t get the girl off my mind.

  As soon as I got my phone out and started dialing, I couldn’t lie to myself anymore. On my first day off in as long as I could remember, I wanted nothing more than to spend it with Naomi.

  “Hello?” she said on the first ring.

  “Hey,” I said. “Got any plans today?”

  “No, why?”

  “Because you do now. We’re going for a picnic.”

  “Is that your way of inviting me out?”

  “Yep, it is. Charming, aren’t I?” I said. When she didn’t answer, I tried again. “Naomi, would you like to come have a picnic with me today?”

  “Is this some kind of family thing again?”

  “Can’t I just want to see you?”

  “I don’t know Xander. Can’t you?”

  She was prickly this morning and I deserved it. Hopefully the picnic would soften her up.

  “I’ll pick you up in thirty.”

  Thirty minutes later, my Porsche was in front of her building, and she was a vision walking toward me. She had on a massive sun hat and a blazing poppy-red dress with so many of the flowers that the pattern was almost hypnotizing.

  “Nice sun hat.” As she got in beside me, I gave it a tap. “Looks like it doubles as an umbrella too.”

  “We can stop by where I got it from and pick one up for you too,” Naomi offered sweetly.

  At her evil smile, I got driving. “No thanks. One of us with a special hat is enough.”

  I pressed a button on the dash and the sunroof unfurled. The delighted expression on Naomi’s face was payment enough for me.

  I pressed another button and cranked up the radio. The Beatles’ All You Need Is Love was playing.

  And so, as I merged onto the highway and my foot nestled into the gas, the wind whipped through our hair as we flung our heads back and sang along. Couldn’t have been the right lyrics, since ours never seemed to match up with the ones on the radio, but we laughed and sang badly and laughed some more. And whenever I managed to sneak a glance over, Naomi looked so invigorated, energy sparkling in her face, that the want to kiss her was all-encompassing, like an addiction.

  Even several minutes later, as we got off the highway and neared our destination, I could feel the want pulsing in me still. It was another song now, some Bob Dylan one that we were also butchering with our sing-along. When we stopped at a red light, and Naomi gave me her most beaming smile yet, I couldn’t stop myself anymore.

  As my lips claimed hers, all rational thought fell away. I wanted this. Just this.

  Naomi’s fingers tugged at my collar. My hands cupped her face.

  A horn blared.

  We separated, laughing as I looked up at the green light.

  I hit the gas.

  A few minutes later, we were there, parked and getting out of the car, picnic basket in hand.

  I’d managed to get us a spot right on the edge of the park, which we could see was flocked with people. I was hoping we’d be able to find a spot to set our spread. I set off straight for the lake.

  As we neared, Naomi paused, “Aren’t there swans?” she asked, looking for the offending creature.

  Sure enough, as soon as I plopped our picnic basket down, a swan waddled up, hissing and snapping its beak menacingly. Immediately, I grabbed Naomi’s hat and waved my own menacing figure-eight back at the swan, who scurried away. Laughing, Naomi snatched her hat back.

  “My hero. Although you should never grab a hat off a lady’s head, you don’t know what her hair situation is underneath.”

  “It was an emergency,” I deadpanned. She only smiled.

  We sat down, her gaze traveling over the lake. It wasn’t a small one; you could hardly see the far end of it. The way the sun was trailing its long white fingers across the reflection of its waves, made it seem to stretch even farther.

  Our spot under the tree was a good one. The combination of the gentle rustling of the wind as it played with the leaves, the soft lap of the lake at the rocky water’s edge, and the far-off murmur of voices was our soundtrack for the day. The air had a crisp clearness that was pleasant too.

  As we set out the food, Naomi went from mildly impressed - “You bought two baguettes?” - to overtly impressed - “You remembered that cherries are my favorite”- to suspicious – “No way you did this for just us.”

  “Why not?” I frowned, ripping off a piece of baguette. I didn’t put it in my mouth, my gaze on her, waiting for her response.

  Naomi nibbled on a piece of Swiss cheese. “It just seems like a lot for the two of us.”

  “And I told you. This is for me. For us. I don’t know what the hell my family’s doing today, and I don’t care.”

  I held up a cherry in between us. My teeth dug into the sweet mahogany flesh of the fruit. She bit into the other side, then drew back. I ate the rest in silence, then asked, “Why did you agree if you were so suspicious?”

  Naomi was picking some lint off her dress. “Let’s not get into this.”

  And in the silence that followed her words, there were so many more. So many half-realizations and twines of feelings that I hadn’t made sense of yet, that I still wasn’t sure I wanted to.

  So I just ate, and to my relief, she did the same.

  “You know that is probably not a good idea,” I told Naomi as she flung a piece of baguette to a group of nearby ducks a few minutes later, once we’d mostly eaten our fill. She only laughed as the ducks waddled up, their beaks snatching for the food.

  A few seconds later, against my better judgment, I found myself tossing a piece of baguette their way too.

  “You were saying?” Naomi said with a smiled faux innocence as she tossed another bread chunk to the ducks, who were pecking at the grass to gobble up the bounty.

  I shook my head. “Just don’t say I didn’t warn you.”

  It only took a few minutes of us chatting and eating before we noticed the intruders. Standing at the edge of our picnic blanket, like particularly overeager sentries, were at least seven ducks.

  As Naomi lifted a piece of baguette to her lips, one particularly bold duck wandered onto the picnic blanket, a little too close for comfort.

  I shooed it away, but Naomi got to her feet. “I think that’s our cue to leave.”

  Getting to my feet, I clapped my hands loudly and advanced on the ducks, but they only parted to let me pass.

  Naomi tugged at my arm. “Just leave them be.”

  I glared at their unfazed glassy eyes, but Naomi tugged my arm again, so I helped her pack up the rest of our stuff and leave.

  There was, admittedly, a nice walk to be had around the circumference of the lake.

  So, arm in arm, we meandered down the dirt pathway. I couldn’t keep my eyes off Naomi’s smile.

  “What is it?” I asked.

  “Just - it looks exactly how I remember, here.”

  “Guess this is a pretty popular park,” I commented. “Came here as a kid?”

 
; She nodded. I tried imagining her as a little girl, but the only image I got was a palm-sized kid with her adult face slapped onto it, which was still adorable but unsatisfactory.

  “The church picnics always used to be here,” Naomi said, pointing. I followed the line of her finger to a far-off willow tree. “That was the place they always had them; hot dogs and hamburgers and the dubious dish that adults always claimed was Jell-O.”

  “Sounds like a riot,” I said, not entirely serious.

  But Naomi was still smiling. “Actually, it was. Although I don’t miss my every Sunday being taken up, I miss that aspect; the community.”

  I didn’t say anything, but Naomi got me thinking. She had a point about community. As annoying as my family was, I did enjoy spending time with them for the most part. Although, there was something nice about long stretches of weeks when it was just Walter and my work too.

  “How’d you find out about this park anyway?” Naomi asked.

  “I came here few times when my family was visiting.”

  “I forgot,” Naomi said, “You’re from Germany.”

  “From Canada,” I corrected her.

  She stopped walking. “But your family….”

  “Moved to Germany when I was about eighteen. Said they’d had enough of the Canadian winters.”

  Naomi nodded, her gaze moved on. “Hell yeah to that. That’s one thing I’ll never get tired of in LA; the weather.”

  I wasn’t so sure though. “But at Christmas, don’t you feel like it’s not really Christmas?”

  Naomi shook her head. “If I really want snow, I can just go to Lake Alpine. Anyway, do I really want to suffer for four months out of the year, just so I can have snow on Christmas?”

  She was about to say something more, but her voice trailed off, and I quickly spotted the reason in the distance. Heading toward us, out of everyone we could have bumped in to, was my family. With Naomi’s words ringing in my ears, I took her by the arm and guided her back the way we came.

  “I’d rather we go this way,” I said briskly.