by Nicole Grane
Chapter 28: Welcome Home
Time is a funny thing, I thought. When you’re watching, it seems to slowly tick by, each minute blending into the next. But, when you look away from it, time slips through your fingers like sand through a sieve.
I’d been at Ashworth Castle now for nearly two months. Raymose had made sure to guilt me into staying day after day under the guise of: he’d never broken a promise to me. If I left now, he’d never be able to teach me to sword fight—again, which, according to him, I was in desperate need of learning.
Although Marcus had made himself clear he wanted me to leave, I kept coming up with excuses for myself why I couldn’t. It all came down to this being the only place I felt close to him. I wasn’t as willing to let go as he was.
I was working half-heartedly on a necklace at the table in my room, something I’d grown accustomed to over the weeks. I looked up at the empty chair across from me. I hadn’t seen Marcus for over six weeks.
I pushed myself away from the table and went out on the balcony. I closed my eyes as a soft breeze kissed my face. I tried to remember his scent, what his lips felt like on mine. I wrapped my arms around myself, trying to hold on to the memory . . .
My phone ringing in the bedroom startled me. I ran to it.
“Hi Kim!” I was so thankful to hear Kim’s voice. “Did you get the box?”
Kim gushed over my new designs. She said Leah was so excited; she couldn’t wait to distribute them.
“I’m glad. I’ve got a few more pieces to send,” I added quickly.
Kim prattled on and on about things back home. My little house was just fine. She’d been watering my plants and collecting the mail for me. Leah had picked up my car and had it brought home a few weeks ago. God I missed them. It was time for me to go home.
“Kim, I think I’ll be home in the next few days. I miss my little house, and all of you.”
Kim picked up right away that something was wrong. I tried to down play it.
“Nothing’s wrong. Marcus has been away on business, and I’m just lonely, that’s all.” It was the truth.
She accepted it and asked me to hurry home.
Being without Marcus for so long had helped me to snap back into the real world. The real world for me was back in Trinidad. I called the airlines and made a reservation for the next day. I knew Raymose would be upset, but he’d just have to deal with it. After all, he’d had six weeks with me, and I’d done tremendously well—considering I was a girl. It was time for him to let go, too.
I met Raymose for practice that afternoon in the garden. He was eager to start, as usual. He looked forward to my lessons more than I did. Raymose was a skilled swordsman, and he enjoyed any opportunity to show off his talent. Secretly, I suspected his greatest achievement with me had been training me well enough to block his advances without shedding any blood. Not an easy feat.
“I thought we’d work a little on foot, then end on horseback today,” he said as he readied himself.
I raised my sword. “Raymose, I’m leaving tomorrow.”
Clank, clank.
“Why?” he demanded as he attacked me again, with more vigor this time.
Clank, clank, clank.
“Marcus doesn’t want me. There’s no reason for me to stay here any longer. I miss my friends, my house,” I explained as I blocked the barrage of advances he made.
Clank, clank.
“I’m going with you.” He swung his sword at my back. Then, like out of some sort of ninja movie, I jumped on a bench and flipped backward to miss the blow—I yelped in pain.
Raymose dropped his sword and caught me before I hit the ground.
I laughed a little between the stabbing sensations.
“Did I get you?” He looked paler than normal. “I don’t smell any blood.”
“No, I think I pulled something in my side.” It hurt to laugh. “Ow! I guess I’m getting too old,” I teased.
“You’re too old?” he laughed lightly.
“We’d better call it a day,” he said as he started carrying me up the castle steps.
Richard looked as pale as Raymose did when he saw him carrying me through the door. “Miss Phoebe!”
“She’s pulled a muscle Richard. You wouldn’t have a heating pack around would you? I hear they help strains.” Raymose looked the picture of cool.
“I’ll ask Charlotte right away.” Richard rushed off toward the kitchen, giving me an anxious second glance.
“I can walk Raymose, really. It’s feeling better already,” I assured.
He set me down carefully.
“Thanks, I’ll see you tomorrow before I go?” I gave him a hopeful smile.
“I’ll be here and ready to go with you.” He brought my hand to his lips and kissed the top of it softly.
“No, Raymose. Luther will come looking for you. I don’t want you to get into trouble over me. I’ll be fine.”
“Now you let me worry about that, my lady.” He smiled convincingly and moved out the door before I could protest any further.
I looked around me. I was alone. I took a deep breath, held my side, and with all the strength I could muster, I slunk back to my room in pain.
I went straight for the bathroom. I needed a hot shower, and Tylenol. What was I thinking flipping like that? How did I flip like that? On the other hand, I couldn’t have avoided it. If I hadn’t, I would be on my way to the emergency room right now . . . or dead on the ground having caused Raymose to revert back to drinking from a human. I shivered at the thought.
I started the shower and took my clothes off. I went to the medicine cabinet, opened the door, and paused. My eyes landed on the little box Dr. Andersen had given me months ago.
I stared at it, mesmerized for a moment. Suddenly, a sinking feeling had formed in the pit of my stomach—too much time had passed. I started to think when my last period was. One, two, three . . . I counted in my head. Six weeks ago? No. That can’t be right! I counted again. It was right! My cycles hadn’t been irregular since my last trip to London—courtesy of Damen I now knew. But still . . . I should have had one by now. Shouldn’t I?
I grabbed the box, tearing it open frantically. I’d asked Dr. Andersen for a pregnancy test—discreetly of course—just in case. It seemed simple enough to use—one step and wait—I took the test.
I got in the shower to relax. I was not going to needlessly upset myself. I took the longest shower I could until the water started to go cold. I tried to justify being late due to the stress I’d been under, the exercising, and the lack of sleep I’d had since Marcus had left. If I threw in the fact that I was partially werewolf and they couldn’t conceive—therefore, I couldn’t conceive, the absence of my period was completely normal. So why did I have a sickened feeling in the pit of my stomach?
I got out of the shower and wrapped myself in a towel. I dried completely off before I went over to the counter to look.
Nooo! This had to be wrong. I took another test from the box and repeated the process, making sure I followed the instructions to the letter. I waited anxiously, rubbing my arms with vigor as a large plus sign appeared—again!
I slumped to the floor in a heap. I couldn’t be pregnant. Marcus said I was half human, but I was also partly werewolf now . . . that had to counter any probability of me being able to have children. Besides, Marcus was gone, and I was alone. He didn’t want me!
“I can’t have a baby,” I said firmly as I stood up and looked at myself in the mirror. I didn’t look pregnant. I didn’t feel pregnant. Not that I knew what that felt like. But I did know I didn’t feel any different than usual. Well, aside from my acrobatic injury . . . and being tired . . . and slightly hungrier. But that was because I’d been training so hard. Wasn’t it?
“What am I going to do?” I mumbled under my breath. My mind spun wildly, trying to form a plan. I needed to go home, before Marcus decided to come back. I couldn’t let him find out. If he came for me, I wanted it to be
for me. Not because he felt some sort of obligation to me.
I got dressed quickly, despite the screams of pain from my body. I began collecting my things around the room. I had just finished my packing when Richard knocked on the door.
“Excuse me Miss, but there is a cab outside?” He paused. His eyes wandered over to my suitcase answering his question.
“Are you alright Miss? You look a little flushed.” He looked me over carefully.
“I’m fine, Richard. The shower was a little too warm, that’s all.”
“If you need to be escorted, Miss, I would be glad to take you anywhere you need to go.”
“Thank you Richard, but I’ve got a ride.”
“Tonight?” He glanced at his watch, a troubled look hung in his eyes. “There’s a full moon expected tonight Miss.”
I froze; then grew a backbone. “I’ll be fine. Please give my apologies to Raymose.”
“Very well, Miss; if you’ll excuse me.” Richard ducked out of the room quickly, not even bothering to say goodbye . . .
“He’s probably ready to get rid of me too,” I grumped, fighting back the lump in my throat.
I stood at the door, taking one last look around the room. I couldn’t afford to let my eyes linger too long. I had to leave. This part of my life was over. I shut the door and made my way downstairs to the waiting cab.
“Where to, Miss?” the driver asked when I entered the cab.
“The airport.” I spoke with authority, not bothering to take one last look behind me as we drove back up the long driveway lined with trees.
“Would you like me to turn on any music, Miss?”
I looked up into the rearview mirror, meeting his stare. His eyes were those of an older man, his mid-sixties perhaps. His hair had already gone completely gray from what I could see in the limited light.
The sun had already gone down, not even a hint of it lingered in the sky— another bleak hour of driving to look forward to before we reached the slightest bit of civilization.
“If you’d like.” I finally answered.
I caught him glancing at me periodically through the mirror, perhaps checking to see if I was still there. I was absorbed in my own thoughts, deliberating whether or not I was making the right decision. Part of me felt guilty for not at least leaving a note, or saying goodbye to Marcus. But he’d asked me to leave. I sat up straight, my heart hardening. I was definitely doing the right thing.
The car swerved violently, screeching the tires. Profanities flew from the driver’s mouth at a rapid pace. Something heavy hit the top of the car, denting the hood in slightly. I held onto the seat in front of me, trying to steady myself as the car resumed its normal path.
I could see beads of sweat across the driver’s forehead through the mirror. His hands, white across the steering wheel, were clenched tight.
“My apologies Miss. Some bloody animal just ran right at the car.” I could see from the mirror he was still quite shaken.
“What sort of animal?” My voice was guarded.
“I couldn’t tell for sure, a dog maybe? No, it was bigger than a dog. I really only saw its eyes.”
My heart fell. “Its eyes?”
“Yellow as gold. It must be dead now. Look at the size of that dent.”
My eyes drifted up. I swallowed loudly. I looked toward the window. It was keeping pace with the car. Just barely out of sight to the human eye, carefully staying hidden from the moonlight—I wouldn’t be going to the airport tonight.
“What’s your name, Sir?”
“Arthur, Miss.” He met my eyes in the mirror. He looked suddenly taken aback. He shook his head. “Some trick the light is playing tonight; must be the nerves.” He laughed nervously; his eyes periodically glanced back to the mirror.
I suddenly felt self-conscious. Marcus had commented once that my eyes turned yellow. But that was only in the dark; and on a full moon. No one else besides him had seen that.
I knew my eyes must look strange to Arthur. I wondered if they even scared him. I glanced out the window again. I realized Arthur’s chance of survival lay solely on me. “Perhaps you should pull over, Arthur.”
“Oh no Miss. This is a long stretch of road. People are said to go missing from time to time along this very stretch. I wouldn’t be human if I let you out here.”
The gold band on his finger caught my eye.
“I’m assuming you want to remain that way?” My words came out darker than I’d intended.
There was a long pause of silence. I could see Arthur gripping the steering wheel so tightly; if he had the strength, he would have snapped it in two.
“Miss?” his voice cracked.
I tossed some cash onto the front seat. “Thank you, Arthur. This will be just fine.”
The car slowed to a stop. I gripped my bag tightly and opened the door.
“Are you sure, Miss?” I could hear the fear in his voice.
“I’ll be fine, Arthur. But unless you leave now, I can’t promise you the same.” I shut the car door and stepped off the road. I watched the red tail lights fade into the blackness before I turned to face my pursuer. I took in a deep breath, my eyes searching for any sign of movement.
“I know you’re out there, Damen,” I called out into the darkness.
His yellow eyes opened, not five feet from me—I jumped, clutching my heart!
A low growl came from behind his teeth.
“I was leaving.” I answered him, surprised. He was talking to me. I understood every word.
“Marcus asked me to go. It’s just like you said, he doesn’t want me anymore.” I tried to make my voice hard and unfeeling, but I faltered. My heart was breaking inside with the harsh words that came from my mouth. The pain was almost unbearable.
I stared into Damen’s yellow eyes. They seemed softer now. The thick fur on his face blew lightly in the breeze. It was still hard to see him with much detail. If only the moon was a little brighter . . .
“No. I won’t come with you.” I answered his question. “Damen, you need to let me go. I don’t belong in your world . . . not anymore.”
He turned his body as if to leave. A strong gust of wind hit me from behind, sending a shiver right through me.
He spun around . . . his lips peeled back exposing his teeth, his nose eagerly sniffing the air.
“Damen?” I took a step back.
He crouched, snarling viciously.
“What are you—” I was hit from behind, my body flipping through the air like a gymnast. Marcus set me down gently a good thirty feet away. He’d already closed the gap between Damen and me.
I watched in horror as their shadows collided in the darkness. Vicious snarling and hissing pierced the night. I covered my ears, trying to drown out the noise. And then I did what I never thought I’d do—I ran.
I made my way to the road, stumbling several times along the way. I could still hear them fighting behind me. The distance and my frantic breathing had become so loud now; it nearly drowned them out. My legs were moving faster than my body could go. I couldn’t see anything in front of me. A thick fog had appeared almost instantaneously, shrouding my vision. It lingered low, concealing my feet and the path ahead. I tripped over the pavement, the road taking my skin as I moved across it—sliding like I was stealing home base.
I lay there, crying, unable to move. The pain in my side was back with a vengeance, rendering me breathless.
“Phoebe!” Marcus shouted as he ran toward me. “Darling are you alright?”
I couldn’t believe it was really him. It felt like it had been forever since I’d seen him. He put his arms under me and lifted me up. “What have you done to yourself now?” His voice was calm. Not what I’d expected.
“Where’s Damen?”
“He’s gone; for now.” I could still feel Marcus’s chest heaving in and out.
“Did he hurt you?”
“Hardly,” Marcus scoffed.
I leaned my head
against him, taking in his sweet smell, the tears subsiding a little. “How did you know where to find me?” I asked as I closed my eyes for a moment trying to ignore my new wounds.
“Richard said you were hurt, and that you’d gone.” He held me closer.
“So that’s why Richard practically ran out of my room.” Traitor!
“What happened?” Marcus asked flatly, his voice a little harder now. He began walking back up the road with me.
I decided to evade his question. “Damen attacked the cab. I asked the driver to pull over and let me out . . . I didn’t want him to get hurt.”
Marcus stopped mid-step. Even in the dark I could see the look of disbelief on his face. He closed his eyes for a moment, my guess, trying to compose himself. “That’s not what I meant,” his tone was a little sharper now as he walked on. “What happened this afternoon?”
Of course that’s what he was referring to. I knew that. I just didn’t want to discuss it. No doubt Richard had him already worked up into a frenzy. He hadn’t wanted me to sword fight for this very reason. “It’s nothing,” I finally answered. “I avoided Raymose’s sword by doing an unexpected back flip.” I winced as another stabbing sensation moved through me. I still couldn’t believe I’d done that. It had to be a werewolf thing.
I could feel the tension in Marcus's arms. He said nothing as he carried me through the night, taking the fastest and least bumpy path—we flew! I was back in my room lying comfortably on my bed before I knew it.
“You’re sure you’re alright?” he asked after a few minutes.
“Yes, it’s just a few scrapes.” I lied, trying to keep my voice as even as I could.
“Your arms tell a different story.”
I looked at my arms and hands, turning them slightly. I must have left half my skin on the road. They were scraped and full of rocks. “I’ll clean them later.” I looked away from him. I felt a crying spree about to begin. Being in our room together brought back the harsh words we’d said before he’d left. I couldn’t look at him.
“So, why did you come home?” I asked.
“I told you. Richard said you were hurt, and that you were leaving.”
“And?” I prompted, my tone bordering surly.
“And what?”
“And why would that make you want to return? You knew I was going to leave. Why come back now?” I was irritated, and I didn’t bother hiding it.
“Phoebe, I’ve missed you.”
I snorted. “You never said goodbye. You never even called me. Not once! How can you say you missed me?”
He said nothing.
I turned toward him. My eyes were blurred from the tears that pooled in them. “You shouldn’t have come back Marcus. You should have just let me leave.” I sat up, forcing myself to stand.
“Phoebe, please lay down.” His voice was anxious.
“I have to go. My plane leaves in the morning. I’ll stay in a hotel tonight.”
“Phoebe it’s not safe!”
“Damen wasn’t going to hurt me!” I insisted. “He was going to let me go. I know it.” If he hadn’t smelled Marcus behind me, I’d be on my way to the airport right now. “Damn! Where’s my suitcase?” I looked around the floor.
“I’ll have Richard retrieve it in the morning. And you’re mistaken if you think Damen would have let you go.”
I gave Marcus an exasperated look. We would never see eye-to-eye on this. “All the more reason for me to leave,” I argued. “I—” I looked at myself. My pants were torn. “I don’t have any clean clothes.” I wasn’t going anywhere.
Marcus took my hand, claiming my attention. “I don’t want you to go. I never did,” he admitted earnestly. “I just thought that if you were far away from here, from me, you wouldn’t get hurt. I stayed away, hoping you’d leave, but it tore a hole in me to think you wouldn’t be here. The only comfort I had was knowing you’d be safe. I love you, Phoebe!”
He loved me? He was just trying to keep me safe? I closed my eyes and sighed. God I was such an idiot!
“Marcus I . . .” I don’t know what I would have said. He crushed his lips against mine, and all thought slipped away . . .
His hands were on my waist, maneuvering me toward the bed. I felt the back of my knees hit the mattress. He fell with me, his body landing on top of mine, my breath catching under his weight.
“Darling I’ve missed you.” His lips kissed mine, again and again while his fingers busily unbuttoned my shirt.
I gripped his face, holding him closer to me. Tears leaked out my eyes. I’d almost left this man. I should have known he’d never stop loving me. I would have left without telling him—I froze.
“Phoebe what is it?” Marcus was leaning over me, his face full of concern. “You’re crying.”
“I . . .” I pulled my shirt closed and pushed myself up to sit. My eyes wandered the room. I was scared to tell him. I wasn’t sure how he was going to react.
“Phoebe?” His hand reached out and held my chin. “What is it?”
I bit my lip, wondering where to begin. I’d have to come clean. There was no way around it. This was not my secret to keep. I was wrong to run away. As mad as Marcus had made me, I couldn’t keep this from him—like the other Phoebe did. It would kill him . . . and I could never do that. “Maybe you should stand over there.” I pointed to the furthest corner in the room.
Marcus gave me a quizzical look before he looked to where I’d pointed and then back to me.
“Ok, you stay here, and I’ll go way over there,” I said, getting to my feet in the hopes of making a quick get-away if need be.
“What have you done?” His tone was disapproving.
I sunk back down on the bed. “Well it wasn’t intentional . . . and it’s not entirely my fault!” I added sharply.
Marcus frowned. I could see that his patience was wearing thin.
“Marcus. You came back because you love me right? You love me, and you want to be with me . . . forever?” I needed him to say it.
“Yes.” He looked bewildered.
“And you’ll always love me?”
“Of course. Phoebe you’re scaring me. What is it?” His eyes, soft and brown, looked wearily into mine.
“Well . . . the day you left, remember when you said you didn’t want me riding Rain because—” I took a deep breath, “ . . . you were worried I might . . .”
“You fell off the horse, didn’t you?” He rose from the bed. “That’s how you got hurt, isn’t it? Phoebe, please don’t take offense, but you’re a terrible rider.”
My mouth popped open. “I am not!” I protested. “Raymose say’s I’m much better now, and for your information, I’m doing quite well with a sword too.” I folded my arms in a pout.
Marcus threw his arms into the air as he shot me an exasperated look. “Alright. Refresh my memory. Why didn’t I want you riding then? I can only imagine what your mind concocted. You blew that whole conversation out of proportion. I simply was afraid that if you were—” He stopped. A look of confusion, then shock, and then wonder took hold of him. His eyes looked me up and down. “Phoebe?” He sat down beside me. He reached out as if to touch me, then paused. He swallowed loudly. “Darling, are you . . .” he froze. The words stuck in his throat.
I gave him a small smile and nodded.
“Are you sure?”
“Uh hum.” I nodded again.
“How long have you known?” His face was still full of wonder. This was as much of a shock to him as it was for me.
I cringed a little. “Since tonight.”
“But you were leaving . . .” He looked at me in disbelief, and then realization took over. “You were going to leave without telling me!” He accused. His tone grew angrier by the second.
“You weren’t home! And it’s not like we’ve been speaking,” I pointed out defensively.
“You should have phoned me. Phoebe, don’t you realize how dangerous that was for you to leave on your ow
n? Damen could have hurt you.”
I pursed my lips. “You told me I should leave. I didn’t think you wanted me anymore.” My voice cracked, losing its momentum of anger. Saying that aloud tore at my heart. “If you came for me, I wanted it to be because you love me. Not because you feel some obligation to me.”
“Obligation? You’re my wife! You’re having my child! I have an obligation to you!” He reached out and took my face in his hands. His eyes were full of concern. “Phoebe I love you. You! Nothing is more important to me than you. Tell me you know that!”
I didn’t have to search his eyes long for the truth. “I know it,” I admitted.
His mouth claimed mine, his kiss, branding me forever. Wiping away all doubt I had about him not wanting me anymore. I couldn’t believe what a fool I’d been.
“I love you,” he breathed. His arms wrapped around me now, lifting me up onto his lap. “You realize your sword fighting days are over.” His words were absolute—adorable—as if that would ever really stop me.
“Don’t worry.” I played with a lock of his hair, twining it around my finger. “I’ll wait until I feel better before I—”
“You will not have a need to practice,” he interrupted. “I’m not leaving you again.”
“Marcus you can’t stay with me. Luther needs you. I’ll go home; I’m ok with it now. I know you love me.”
“I do love you,” he said, giving me another reason to smile. “But you need me too. You’re going to stay right here where I can look after you. I won’t leave you, ever again.”
Stubborn man. “Marcus, be reasonable. You know that’s a promise you can’t keep.”
“I’ll find a way.”
I took a deep breath. There was no arguing with him—now anyway.
“I think we should take care of these scrapes,” he reminded me gently. I had all but forgotten about them.
“They don’t hurt so much anymore . . . well, except for this one.” I turned my arm, examining my elbow. It was the worst.
Marcus retrieved the first aid kit from the bathroom and gingerly cleaned my arms. I examined his handy work. He was getting pretty good at patching me up. He didn’t even grimace anymore. I took that as a good sign, especially for a vampire.
“What are you thinking?” His eyes flickered to mine as he applied the last bandage.
“My blood . . . it doesn’t seem to bother you anymore.”
He laughed. “Let’s just say I’ve grown used to the sight of it.”
“So the temptation is gone?” I smiled excitedly.
“Only if I hold my breath.” His laughter had subsided. Marcus’s face grew serious again. “As long as you bleed . . . you will never be entirely safe with me. Phoebe, you must never forget that. You must never forget what I am.” I knew he spoke the truth, although I couldn’t imagine myself safer with anyone else.
I snuggled into him, our bodies falling back onto the mattress. I inhaled deeply, taking him in. For the first time in weeks, I felt like I could breathe.
“Marcus?” I hesitated. “Everything will be alright, won’t it?”
I looked up into his golden eyes. He smiled warmly. “Yes, my love. Everything will be alright.”
I rested my head back against his chest, my arm holding onto him. “I missed you.”
He pulled the blankets over me, tucking me in tight beside him. “I missed you too, Darling.” He kissed the top of my head as he reached over and clicked off the light. “Now sleep.”