by Robyn Nyx
“You’re all but done with the album, aren’t you? Doesn’t that mean you two can get on with it?”
Heather smiled widely. She could barely wait. “We’ve got one more session on Friday to finalize it, and Louie’s got something special planned for Saturday.” She realized she was nibbling at the end of her thumb and wondered if it held any significance. Was she that desperate to get her mouth on Louie?
“Really? An intimate dinner at her place, by any chance?”
Heather shook her head. “I don’t think so. All I know is that I’ve got to dress up.” She giggled and touched her hand to her lips, before wondering again about the significance of her current obsession with her mouth. The word “excited” simply didn’t encompass the vastness of Heather’s emotional and physical state. She couldn’t remember ever wanting something or someone this much. The torture of spending so much time in close proximity without being able to do anything about it had ramped her anticipation levels into overdrive. Strangely, there was no niggling feeling that the fire might quickly burn into ash once the liaison was no longer illicit.
“Aren’t you worried you might not wear the right outfit? Too casual. Too elegant. Oh, the pitfalls, Feathers.”
Heather shoved Emma’s leg, and she only just caught her plate before it tumbled off her leg.
“Well, I wasn’t worried, but now I am. So thanks for that.”
Emma tapped Heather’s leg and nodded. “Glad to be of assistance. I hope you’ve bought new lingerie?”
Heather put her fork down and stood, her appetite diminished considerably with talk of Louie. She was hungry for something other than food. “You think I’m that easy?” She headed for the kitchen. “I’m getting another bottle. Red or white?”
“White. And as far as I know you haven’t had sex with anyone other than yourself for over five years. I expect that you’ll be throwing yourself at Louie at the earliest opportunity,” Emma said as she followed Heather into the kitchen and sat at the breakfast bar.
The reminder that she’d been so sexually inactive since hitting Nashville was concerning. What if she was no good at it anymore? Was it possible to forget how to have sex? And Louie had made it clear she wanted the sex to be two-way. There was no way she could retreat into being a pillow queen. Not that she wanted to. The combination of the daydreams she’d been having of getting her hands on Louie and the hot lesbian erotica had her reaching into her nightstand on a nightly basis. She couldn’t recall being this desperately hot for someone. Ever. “I won’t be throwing myself at her,” Heather said. Emma raised an eyebrow. “Maybe just a gentle jump.”
“In public?”
Heather poured the wine into two fresh glasses and pushed one toward Emma. She smiled tightly. “We won’t be making out in my office, if that’s what you’re getting at.”
Emma took a quick sip of her wine. “I see plenty of women walking around the city not getting any hassle from anyone. Don’t you think you’re overthinking this?”
“And are any of those women trying to make it in the music industry?” Heather didn’t wait for a response before continuing. “You only have to look at what happened to Caren White’s career to see that country isn’t the inclusive utopia we’d all like it to be. Rocky Top couldn’t get rid of her fast enough as soon as she came out, and her record sales halved.”
“But you’re behind the scenes, Feathers. Do you think anyone really cares who you sleep with?”
Heather rubbed her forehead and rolled her shoulders. “Aaron was behind the scenes and that didn’t matter to Donny. How many times are we going to have this conversation? As long as I work at Rocky Top, I have to be discreet. I told you what Donny said. ‘I don’t want any queers under my roof.’ Until I can start my own label, I have to pretend to be who they think I am.” Having to justify her lifestyle to Emma, someone who’d never had to deal with homophobia, bristled like a rough tag in a T-shirt. It was easy to challenge something having never experienced it. Usually Emma was more sensitive to her need to stay closeted, but maybe the wine had loosened her tongue just a little too much.
“And how’s Louie going to cope with that? It’s not like she’s a retiring wallflower when it comes to wearing her sexuality on her sleeve.”
Heather pulled the scrunchie from her wrist and tied her hair back. She needed the time to compose herself, not wanting to blow up. It wasn’t Emma’s fault she didn’t understand her situation fully. She knew how hard it was to be taken seriously as a woman in country music, but being a lesbian too was another layer of complicated Emma didn’t have to deal with. “Em, it’s not like I actually want to be living my life this way, you know? I can’t wait to be with Louie, and I want to show her off and just be with her anywhere and everywhere. But I’m pretty certain Donny would fire me if he even got a sniff of the fact that I’m gay.” Heather reached over the counter and took Emma’s free hand. “I’ve spent the last five years building my career, and I’m sure Savana’s album is going to enhance my reputation. I’m maybe a couple of years away from being in a position to secure an investment to start my own label. I can’t—I won’t blow it now.”
Emma smiled and squeezed Heather’s hand. “I’m sorry. I’m being an insensitive asshole. Is Louie going to be all right being discreet?”
“I hope so. I guess we haven’t discussed it in a lot of detail yet. She knows what Donny’s like. Savana kind of delighted in telling her that he wasn’t happy about her hiring a ‘queer’ to write her album. It didn’t seem to faze Louie. She’s probably used to a lot worse than that.” Heather nodded toward the living room and held up the wine. “Let’s get comfortable with this next bottle.”
Heather led the way and topped up both of their glasses before settling back into the sofa.
Emma kicked off her shoes and tucked her feet beneath her. “And what’s going on with Savana? Is Louie right? Is she hot for you?”
Heather drew her own feet underneath her ass and scooched closer to Emma as if the conversation they were about to have could be overheard by the northern mockingbirds outside. “Maybe. I don’t know.” Heather shrugged. “She’s very affectionate with me, but I don’t know if that’s just her way of being friends with someone.”
“Is she like it with any of the others in the room?”
Heather pulled her ponytail to the side and began to fiddle with it. Anything to distract her from addressing this possible problem. “Not really. She’s fine with Vetti. She treats her more like a body woman, expecting her to tend to her every whim, which of course she’s happy to do because that’s part of her job.” She rubbed her chin, trying to recall little interactions over the past few weeks. “She sits close to Louie, but I’ve never seen them touch anything other than accidentally. And that leaves Tim. You’ll be pleased to know it doesn’t look like she has any designs on him.” Heather nudged Emma playfully.
Emma’s eyes narrowed. “She would have a hell of a fight on her hands if she went anywhere near my boy.”
Heather laughed. “Like Tim has eyes for anyone but you.”
A hint of crazy flashed across Emma’s face.
“He’d have no eyes if he did start eyeballing some other woman,” Emma said. “But anyway, back to you. Is she flirting with you?”
Heather nibbled on her lip. Was Savana flirting because she was interested or was it just for her own amusement? “I guess so. You know what I’m like. I don’t know if a woman is being friendly or if they’re flirting for real. Men are damn near transparent, but women?” Heather shook her head. “I have no idea unless they come straight out with it.”
“Like Louie did.”
“Exactly like that. Lesbians everywhere should take lessons from Louie about letting women know what they want.” Heather drifted again to thoughts of doing filthy things to Louie.
Emma waved a hand in front of Heather’s face. “There you go again. Off to Louie Land. Dirty bitch.”
Heather giggled, once again struck by the carnal nature of he
r attraction to Louie. So what if Savana flirted with her? It wouldn’t matter if Savana draped her naked self on a piano and begged Heather to make love to her. Just like Tim for Emma, Heather only had eyes for one person, and she couldn’t wait to cast her eyes over a naked Louie. But Emma’s question itched at the back of her mind. Louie would be okay with them keeping their relationship relatively quiet. Wouldn’t she?
Chapter Thirty-one
Louie closed her eyes as she played the last chord on the first song she’d written for Savana. She wanted to enjoy the moment, the feeling that she was finally getting somewhere with her long-held dream. She let the intensity of the atmosphere wash over her like a tropical rain shower. When she opened her eyes, she looked up to the booth to see Heather smiling back at her through the booth’s glass. Either the song sounded pretty good or Heather was happy to lock gazes with her. Maybe both wasn’t too much to ask for. Louie returned the smile with what she hoped was a promise of what was to come tomorrow night.
“That was good. Let’s go again from the beginning.”
The voice of the producer bellowed into the studio space. Heather jumped, and the moment was shattered.
“Good but not great. What was wrong with it?” asked Savana.
“I’m not feeling you. You’re holding back,” he said.
Louie didn’t seek Heather’s eyes again. She knew she wouldn’t be able to resist a little grin at how the producer had spoken to Savana. Louie assumed they had a long history because she was certain Savana wasn’t a fan of being spoken to so bluntly. Instead she busied herself with fine-tuning her guitar and waited for Savana’s reaction.
“You think I’m holding back?” Her voice raised slightly. “When have you ever heard me hold back?”
Louie glanced up at the producer to see him holding his hands in the air.
“I’m telling it how I’m hearing it. When have you ever wanted me to hold back?” He leaned closer to the mic connecting the booth to the studio. “You told me you wanted this to be a defining record in your career. You’re not going to achieve that if you’re not prepared to go places you haven’t been before vocally.”
Louie would’ve whistled had it not been wildly inappropriate. Who was this guy to speak to Savana like that? She saw Savana’s manager, Joe, get up from his seat and put his hand on the guy’s back. Louie saw them exchange some words off-mic before he shrugged Joe’s hand away.
“Why don’t you come in here and listen to it for yourself?” he asked.
Louie turned to the session drummer who raised her eyebrows at Louie. Everyone was uncomfortable.
“Fine,” said Savana. “Take a break.”
The rest of the musicians left the room like they’d been called to collect the winning lottery ticket. Louie placed her guitar on the stand and motioned to Heather to join her outside.
“Heather, I’d like you to stay.” Savana strode past Louie and slipped through the adjoining door to the booth.
Heather raised her shoulders almost imperceptibly. Louie offered a smile she hoped came off as both sympathetic and rueful. A few minutes alone with her would’ve been nice. Louie had already envisioned a little tryst in a closet somewhere. But it wasn’t to be. She saw Savana dismiss both her producer and manager, then she glared at Louie.
Savana placed her hands on her hips. “What are you waiting for?”
“Sorry.” Louie pushed through the adjoining door and walked out of the booth. Something wasn’t right, and she didn’t like leaving Heather in there alone to cope with what looked like a potential diva meltdown.
Joe stood in the corridor tapping at his phone like a demented otter with a rock on a snail, and the producer was flat out on a couch with his feet up looking completely unaffected by Savana’s behavior. If they had a history, maybe he was used to this kind of tantrum. He looked settled though, so Louie figured this might take a while. She probably had time to hit Anti Bean to get a bottle of vitamin water and a weak coffee for Heather.
Louie felt in her back pocket. No wallet. “Aww, crap.”
She turned back, knocked, and pushed open the door.
It took a moment for her to make sense of the scene she walked into. Heather was leaning against the mixing desk, and it would’ve been impossible to fit a guitar pick between her body and Savana’s. And their mouths were pressed together in a steamy-looking kiss.
Savana broke off, looked sideways at Louie, and narrowed her eyes. “Can I help you with something?”
Louie didn’t respond. She could only see the look of obvious astonishment on Heather’s face. Her arms were drawn into her body as if she were shielding herself from something unpleasant, and she looked to be holding her breath.
“What’re you doing?” Louie moved into the booth and let the door close behind her.
Savana sneered. “What you’ve been wanting to do for a month. Looks like you waited too long, or you just realized you’re not in Heather’s league and that’s why you haven’t made a move.” She jutted her chin toward Louie. “You should turn around and leave.”
Louie ignored the provocation. She had nothing to prove to Savana and had no urge to share the beginnings of her relationship with Heather. She looked around Savana at Heather. “Are you okay?”
Heather pushed away from the desk. “I’m fine, Louie. It’s okay.”
Heather’s voice faltered. She straightened her skirt and seemed anything but fine. Savana had a smile on her face Louie wanted to wash off with sulfuric acid. Louie pushed the desire deep down where it belonged.
“You heard what she said.” Savanna waved her hand at Louie. “They say the best woman wins, but it’s not clear you’re really a woman so maybe this was never a fair fight.”
Louie clenched her jaw and concentrated her focus on Heather. She wanted to remain professional and had to be careful. “Do you want to step out for a coffee, Heather?”
Savana shook her head. “She doesn’t want to step out with you at all. We’re all good here so you can disappear.”
Heather ran her hand through her slightly messy hair and smiled, but Louie could see it wasn’t genuine.
“Honestly, Louie. I’m okay.”
Savana put her arm around Heather, but she recoiled from her touch.
“Do you want to be in here with her?” Louie asked Heather, her patience beginning to run thin.
“Who the hell do you think you are?” Savana ate up the ground between them and stood inches away from Louie. “I’m giving you three seconds to turn around and walk away, or I walk up to Donny’s office and have you fired.”
Louie held firm and imagined her wrists were bound, immobilizing her hands from wrapping around Savana’s scrawny neck. “Go ahead. And I’ll tell him how his number one signing just sexually assaulted one of his top employees.” Louie swallowed, but it was too late to pull the words back. Blackmailing the talent probably wouldn’t earn her any more gigs in this town if it got out.
Savana laughed as she reached past Louie and pulled open the door. “I didn’t assault anyone. You may not want to believe it, but she consented.” She looked smug. “You’re finished.”
Louie didn’t watch Savana leave. Her concern was with Heather. She rushed over and tried to hold her, but Heather held up her arms to stop her.
“Please. Don’t.” She shook her head. “I’m sorry, Louie. It’d probably be best if you left for the day. We’ll talk later. Let me sort this out.”
The knockback pulled on Louie’s heart like a snapped guitar string. What was happening? Had she misread the situation and Heather did want Savana’s attention? “Just because she’s a woman doesn’t mean you should put up with being assaulted, Heather.”
Heather took a step back and leaned against the back of a chair. “Don’t you think I know that?” She sighed. “Please. Go home and let me deal with this.”
Had Louie just rode in like a misguided white knight to save the damsel who wasn’t in distress? “What about the rest of the recording session?�
� Louie asked just for something to say. She didn’t dare ask the question bashing at the back of her throat to be voiced. Did you kiss her back?
“We may not even continue recording today.”
Heather didn’t move toward Louie, and the lack of physical contact hurt. All Louie wanted to do was draw Heather into her arms, hold her gently, and tell her everything would be all right. She’d known all along that Savana had designs on Heather, but she never thought she’d end up being so blatant about it. Her contract was to write the album and she’d done that. Donny couldn’t fire her. But he did have the power to blackball her in this town. Would this signal the end of her Nashville career before she’d really even begun? Louie looked hard at Heather for something else. Anything else. She didn’t know what. But her features were shut down. She’d withdrawn. Louie knew Heather was right. This was her situation to deal with, and Louie had little right to step in and act as if Heather couldn’t stand up for herself.
Louie backed away. Heather needed space to process, and Louie didn’t want to crowd her. She pushed away the dark cloud that threatened to rain on her plans and wash away the roots of her fledgling relationship with Heather. “Okay. If that’s what you want. I’ll leave.” She put her hand on the door and partially opened it. “You’ll call me later?”
Heather nodded. “Of course. And I’ll see you tomorrow night.”
Relief swept over Louie like a breaking wave. Heather’s words seemed genuine. It was selfish considering the circumstances, but she couldn’t bear the thought of losing Heather. Even if she didn’t really have her yet, she’d fight Savana all the way if she had to. Savana’s words were on repeat: “You’re not in Heather’s league.” Fears she’d worked hard to submerge began to float to the surface. Was she kidding herself that Heather would really be interested in her when someone like Savana was in the picture?
Chapter Thirty-two
Heather placed her hands on the mixing desk and stared into the empty, dark space of the studio. She took a deep breath and tried to figure out what the hell had just happened and what she was supposed to do about any of it. Everything had happened so fast. Savana had asked her what she thought of the track and she’d been honest. She did love it and she did think that the producer was on the wrong track. Heather said he’d misunderstood what Savana was trying to achieve with this record. The next thing she knew, Savana pressed against her and kissed her. To say it had taken her by surprise was the understatement of her life.