by Karen Binnie
Chapter 18
I’m aware of the comforting strokes across my hand as my senses realign themselves, I try to open my eyes but it’s hard to focus on my surroundings.
“Al’ice what happened?”
Jez lets go of my hand, after all that had just happened, after all he had done for me and I call him Al’ice.
Still unaware that it is Jez by my side, unaware of his concern and comforting gestures, I pull myself into a sitting position, reaching out to touch him, “Al’ice?”
The figure beside me raises his head and asks, “How do you feel?”
“Oh Jez it’s you, sorry I can’t seem to focus yet.”
“Do you realise what happened to you?”
I wipe at my eyes with my right hand in the vain hope it will help me to focus and reach for his shoulder with my left, “did I faint?”
Jez stands from his sitting position on the bed and makes his way towards the door, then turns to face me as if changing his mind, “You had a fit Jol, too much too soon Cooper said, do you know what that means?”
I shake my head. I do not know why Cooper has said that.
“Look at you, your dramatic transformation, you’ve changed Jol thanks to them, they’re pushing you into something you’re not ready for, do you think they really care about you eh! about us? They care about their people, about saving them and they’re killing you in the process.”
“No, don’t be so stupid, how can you say that? They’re your people too!”
“I know what I see Jol, and your father, do you not even wish to attend the funeral?”
He turned on his heel taking his anger. Jez left the room.
It took a while to regain my eyesight and clear the fog from my mind, he is wrong, Al’ice wouldn’t hurt me. I process the images of the last few hours but cannot shake the feeling of contentment deep inside despite my apparent fit, what did it mean? If Gran was here I would ask her if there is a history of fits in the family, there’s a grey area in my brain, with each question the grey erases my doubts and fears, as if there’s something or someone trying to stop me from knowing the truth.
I think about the connection between myself and Jez. Is that why he’s so worried? If we really are linked somehow then perhaps he is reacting to the many questions I have, to the fear I suppress deep inside. I drop my legs over the side of the bed and listen to the silence, the others gone. My dad is dead, I had no right feeling happy in Kamerrean with Al’ice, Jez is right, how can I have forgotten so easily about the funeral, ‘dad forgive me’. Al’ice will help me sort the arrangements, protect me from the evil when I go back, I’m sure he will, I have to find him.
A voice enters my solace, ‘I’m sorry.’
‘Jez, is that you?’
‘Yes’
‘Where are you?’
‘Outside’
The sun was approaching midday already, Al’ice was right, time did not matter here, passes so quickly it’s difficult to keep track of it. I see Jez sitting outside the cottage on the rock beside the river where he had been earlier. He is throwing pebbles into the water in frustration. I sit quietly beside him. We both stare into the clear water, watching a small cluster of fish darting back and forth as if they have lost their way. The silence between us is deafening over the gentle trickle of the river, the air calm but cool as the sun arrives, burning away any lingering mist.
Several minutes pass before I pluck up the courage to speak, “I do not believe they are killing me Jez, the fit could just be a coincidence, hereditary or something.”
“Your family, have a history of that?”
“I don’t know but it could be. Al’ice would not hurt me, deep in your heart Jez you must know that.”
“Hhhmmmph!”
He turns and looks me straight in the eye, “I was right about your father though, you should attend the funeral……………..”
I raise my hand to silence him, “I know.”
“How much do we really know about these people Jol? family? ok I’ll take that but have they told you everything or do you feel like there’s something missing, the last piece of the puzzle, lost?”
I return my gaze to the confused fish but nod in agreement, “you are right Jez, we need to know exactly what’s going on, without that, I may not return.”
“From where?”
“Home, I have to attend to my family affairs, I mean what happens to the house now? Where will I live? I don’t even know what my dad's wishes are, he may not want to be buried in New Zealand or even buried at all.”
One solitary tear rolls from my eye as I try explaining how I feel, “why didn’t I think of all this before, I know they need me here, whatever it is inside me can heal, we have both seen that, but my father needs me too.”
Jez feels my pain and half wishes he had not been the one to re-surface it, I sense his remorse, he wants to comfort me, his instinct to put his arms around me and hold me close, I half wish he would but Jez cannot bring himself to do it. His inner turmoil quite evident I wonder if he is aware that I can tell, perhaps close emotional contact is something he just isn’t used to.
“We need answers Jol, there are a lot of unanswered questions, we’ll face them together, I will help you if you want me to?”
Inside the cottage hidden high in the Scottish mountains, Aijin finished cleansing her son’s body. Dallon now lies under a single sheet on the floor at the centre of the room. Al’ice places a comforting arm around her shoulders as the mother suppresses her sobs and looks towards Eldeen for a miracle.
Eldeen stood and began the gendaris ritual, he had performed this only once before on this land and had vowed never to attempt it again following its failure. He stumbled over the words at first as he struggled to remember them clearly,
“Raislet, seplet, runaic, seplet.”
He cupped the amber globe upon his staff as it broke into several pieces. Each piece he kissed before placing it upon the sheet which covered Dallon's body, one on the forehead, one at the neck, two at the chest, one on the stomach area, one on each thigh and on each ankle. With the last piece in place, each begins to glow, a kaleidoscope of colours, red, then blue, then white, then orange and finally green invading the room. The jadic green casting long shadows across the walls as the power begins to grow, Eldeen begins the second part of the ritual as the others watch in silence, Cooper guarding the door from intruders.
“Creadein, encasse, suspiende, MORPHAEL!!”
Eldeen collapses to his knees on the final word, his hands shaking violently, as beside the body rises an opaque wall which spreads from head to toe until the whole of Dallon’s body is encased in the coffin like structure. Eldeen attempts to touch the top but his own body is weak from the ritual, he is frozen like a kneeling contorted statue, he stares through the eyes of Al’ice and silently asks,
‘You must draw out his soul, I cannot complete, Pathegine.’
Al’ice nods to his uncle and releasing his grip on Aijin he holds his hand over Dallon’s body, as the final word is spoken, he reaches into the chamber causing ripples upon the surface and gently pulls from the body the ghostly image of the boy.
Dallon stood beside his sleeping body looking down at the grave image, his mother gasps tears of joy as she reaches forward to embrace him, her arms passing through his effigy, Al’ice holds her steady as she grasped the realisation of her sons fate.
“Remember Aijin what I explained to you, Dallon now walks the path of the un-dead, he can only be saved if we can locate Tadge.”
Dallon stepped forward and pressed his ghostly lips to his mother’s forehead, careful not to lean too deeply, she shivers as the icicles brush against her skin.
“I feel no pain mother, please do not cry.”
Jez takes the lead and in a moment of weakness grabs hold of my hand, leading me towards the village, I cannot help but return this gesture with my own grasp, stiff and alien towards him as I try to concentrate on what I should do f
irst once I return home. I am sure he wishes my fingers to reciprocate his tender touch but I am too distracted.
The village is more like a hamlet of stone dwellings dotted along the river, about ten can be seen, at the centre, a flat meeting place covered by animal hide with benches dotted around inside facing a round gap in the middle. It is easy to imagine Eldeen standing proud at the centre whilst holding counsel with his people.
A handful of villagers are milling around, chopping wood, cooking, talking whilst enjoying the rare warmth from the sun, they pay no attention to the strangers in their midst. A group of children are playing, dancing in a circle and singing a foreign song, when they see us approach they brake hands and surround us in a tight circle. Their dirty faces smiling up at us both as they pull at our hands excitedly, whirring us round in circles as they sing, laughing. These few precious moments with the innocent is hard to ignore, with their infectious laughter drawing us in, we dance round in circles as the children lead us, much to their own amusement.
The few mothers lost in the chore of washing, look up and smile at the happy scene watching us, the odd couple revel in the joy, the happiness a stolen moment. At last the singing stops in a rising crescendo as the children fall to the ground, I look at their round smiling faces chuckling red and am reminded of my own childhood and a game based on death, ring a ring of roses. Jez holds out his hand to the nearest boy and shakes it in appreciation then almost without thinking places his hand on my waist, holding me as I laugh with the children, gasping for breath. The children eventually skip away in the knowledge they’ve had their fun with the strangers as we stop to rest on one of the benches in the sanctuary of the meeting place.
“We had better sit for a while, you look exhausted.”
I struggle to regain my breath as I tell him, “You’re good with children.”
“Just lucky I guess, never had the chance to play like that when I was a child.”
He is reluctant to reveal more about himself, I watch his face as he adds frowning, “have you noticed just how perfect these people are? Their great stature badly hidden underneath the primitive clothes, even the children are perfect, not like real humans at all.”
Two older men sat in conversation eyed the strangers warily as they sent furtive glances towards Aijin’s cottage where Cooper stood, smiling as she watched the charade, before slipping behind the door unseen, closing it gently behind her. She stooped to help Eldeen to a stool, his face ghastly and grey from the exertion, his body still and unpliable.
“Cooper you must give Dallon the message now, we have little time.” remarked Al’ice.
She faced the boy and placed her hand in his, her mind created the message and wrapped it into a ball which travelled through her body, along her arm and to her hand, she held it steady,
“When you find Kate, stay with her, do not leave her side and if you sense evil, protect yourselves as best you can. You will know Tadge when he arrives, tell him immediately you have a message from Tilly and pass him this, do not hesitate, give him the message at once.”
Dallon nodded in understanding and smiled at his mother, a rare smile she may never see again.
“Come now” said Al’ice, “I will take you to the start of your journey, on the way I will allow you to probe my mind for knowledge of Kate.”
As the boy gave his mother one last ghostly hug before leaving, Cooper helped Eldeen to his feet, she grabbed his broken staff for him to lean on as he whispered into her ear.
She turned to Aijin, “Eldeen is most proud of your efforts and is sorry we must leave you, please stay beside your son’s body and do not allow any others to enter, be patient Aijin, we have five days, five days for the miracle to work, if it can. I will visit you daily.”
Cooper gripped Aijin’s hand tightly in encouragement, “we shall do our very best, and pray to the moon gods for success.”
Aijin shook her hand gratefully and wiped the tears from her face with the other, it was going to be a long five days.
Jez had asked me to wait and regain my strength after our impromptu dance whilst he ran around the remainder of the village looking for the others. I lean back against one of the posts and take in the scene around me, a man walks past and nods, he has a welcoming grin and is dressed like the others in plain woven garments, Jez is right, they are a beautiful race. I return his greeting, wondering what year it is in the real world, the world of the ancient celts living amongst the hills below.
A door to a cottage opens up ahead and I witness Al’ice emerge, my heart leaps at his visage, I want to run to his side but there is something beside him, something which has caught my eye, stopping me. He is deep in conversation, not with himself but with, what is that? A ghostly image walks beside him, a teenage boy shimmering in the sunlight, I can see the grass and the river through his body. My mouth falls open, I have never seen a ghost before, never believed they existed but then again the last few days had produced many surprises.
Jez runs up beside me, “catching flies?”
I clamp my mouth shut in embarrassment and point up ahead, “do you see that?”
He follows my gaze, “see what?”
“Al’ice”
“Where?”
“Walking away from the village, look, can you see who he‘s with?”
Jez strains his eyes, Al’ice was now almost a dot on the horizon, “is that him? looks like he’s by himself, why didn’t you go after him?”
Before I can answer, the door to the cottage opens once more and we watch in silence as Cooper appears almost carrying Eldeen slumped by her side whilst attempting to lean on his staff, they make their way slowly towards his cottage at the far end of the village.
“I wonder what happened?”
“Stop wondering, let’s find out” Jez replies.
Jez heard the crying long before we reached Aijin’s cottage, with his senses heightened, he knocks gently on the door. There is a stuttered break in the sobs before a woman’s voice can be heard from within, cracked and weary she stumbles over her alien words, “Please…do…..not……enter.”
We look at each other, he shrugs, neither of us can understand what she’s saying, I place my hand on his arm and push him gently aside.
“It is only Jol, I am staying with Eldeen, is everything ok?”
There is a long pause before finally the woman speaks, this time in words we both understand, “Jol…….Eldeen.”
Jez whispers, “Let’s just go in.”
“No! you stay here, you don’t know what state she is in.”
I hold my hand against the door and begin to push it open when it slams back with the full force of the woman’s body behind it, “ELDEEN” she pleads.
Eldeen’s cottage door is firmly shut, as we both hover outside, glancing at each other in trepidation.
“You can come in” comes Coopers voice from inside, “and leave the door open, it is so stuffy in here.”
She is sat against the back wall, arms folded as if she has been waiting for us, Eldeen is no-where to be seen.
“I would prefer to talk in here despite the stale air, grandfather may awaken and need my help, please sit.”
It is as if she already knows what we want, revealed in the dogged determination of her speech, both Jez and I can feel the anxiety flowing between us as we sit together in silence, as if waiting for a priest to begin a long drawn out sermon.
I take hold of his hand, less harshly than before, I feel his hard calloused skin rough against my own.
“Before I begin, I must know how you are feeling Jol?”
“I’m ok.”
“Please let me know if you feel unwell at all, I do not wish to burden you with sickness.”
“Just get on with it” Jez snaps, I squeeze his hand to ease the tension.
Cooper shoots him an angry look, then rises from her seat, standing proud beside the door drinking in the smell of fresh air.
“First, I am concerned for your health
Jol, I am aware that you wish to return to farewell your father………”
Jez squeezes my hand back, as he feels the anxiety welling inside at the mention of my dad, I keep my eyes forward, fixed on Cooper.
“I suggest for now you allow me to return and assess the situation, we cannot be sure it is safe for you just now, in case the demon…………….”
She lets the words trail off as if unable to admit what the demon will do.
“I will not allow your father to pass without your blessing, are you in agreement?”
I just stare for a moment, still unaware that Al’ice had been economical with the truth, oblivious to the fact my dads body lay at the bottom of a deep ravine somewhere in the North Island, I consider her words, it did seem like a sensible plan and sure I can trust Cooper, I nod in agreement.
“Are you sure?”
Jez’s voice enters my mind, I look at him and wonder why he does not speak up in front of Cooper.
“It seems to be the best plan, if I am in danger?” I add silently.
He nods in agreement.
Our exchange has not been lost on Cooper, long wise to the abilities of her own kind but for now she keeps quiet and allows us the closeness we have discovered.
“Thirsty?” she asks.
Before we can answer Cooper pours three mugs of tea from the cold pot on the fire without thinking.
“When our people were forced to leave Kamerrean, we arrived in this new land and sought refuge high in the mountains, far from prying eyes. We are different, we have powers, most advanced compared to the natives we share this beautiful country with. Our powers lay dormant within us until the coming of age, in your times this would be known as 18. On this birthday, the head of the family take their kin to our Kamerrean, where the passage is completed. Eldeen is too weak for this task now and he has asked Al’ice to take you Jez on his return, if you are willing?”
This news surprises Jez, “What are you talking about?”
“Your powers Jez, you may have an earth mother but your father was a member of the brotherhood, one of the four leaders of our people, a great man, he will have passed on his powers at your conception.”
Her words cut across his heart, his father, he had never known him, all he had left was the book. I wonder what he’s thinking, “what book?” I ask.
He glances at me warily, he has not even spoken to me and yet I have read his mind, this invasion is becoming just a little weird.
“I did not mean to pry, I am sorry Jez, I find this weird too.”
He smiles in reassurance, “yeah well, it takes a little getting used to, I’ll tell you about the book later.”
“I think you should go with Al’ice, you may learn more about your father.”
Cooper grows tired of our silent exchange and slams her mug against the mantle to remind us of her presence.
“Well, it does not matter you can decide later.”
“Cooper, where did Al’ice go and who was he with?” I ask.
“You saw Dallon?” she asks surprised.
“I saw Al’ice leave over the mountain, he was talking to a young man, I think, well at least he looked like a young man but there was something odd about his appearance, he was sort of, glowing.”
“I never saw anyone” says Jez.
I ignore him and wait for Cooper’s explanation. Cooper has returned to the door, staring out, distracted by her thoughts, the sunlight catches her hair, which shimmers almost luminously except for the black streak like a dark stain which falls through her hair to one side. Heaving a deep sigh she turns back to us, “Your grandmother is my twin sister, Jesveril, she………………………”
“Stop avoiding the question” barks Jez.
I squeeze his hand encouragingly, “wait Jez, I want to know what she has to say.”
“I am not avoiding the question if you can be patient! All will become clear.” Cooper takes another deep breath but remains calm, “Jesveril and I were very close in some ways but she did not settle well into our life here, she always wanted more.”
That sounds like my gran, always the adventurer, I’m amazed that gran is actually from this place, I wonder how old she actually is.
“When our people slowly began to fall foul of the sickness, Eldeen tried everything in his power to cure the disease, even seeking help from outside trying to source the reason behind it. The first to die was a young boy named Gredon, then others followed but the disease, it advanced, only attacking the oldest as if knowing that their defences were weak whilst they still had their powers which the disease seemed to crave. Eldeen believed a powerful force was behind the disease, he had his suspicions but could not prove its source. In his search for a cure Eldeen discovered that an angel’s breath could restore life to those who tread on the line between life and death and myself and Jesveril were tasked with finding such a celestial being. Our quest became much harder than first thought, we had no idea what or whom we were seeking whilst travelling the timelines, once we stumbled across the demonic side of the un-dead. These dark ones almost tricked us into believing they were the being we sought and attacked us, I became seriously ill and with help, was able to return. Jesveril in turn, was saved from her demonic fate by the very being we had been looking for, a chance meeting which changed the course of things to come.”
Cooper pauses for a moment, then pours herself more of the cold nasty tea.
“Tadge is his name, a beautiful creature, I have to admit I was jealous of the love they shared. He never liked my name and would always call me Tilly, I do not know why. He agreed to help us but by doing so he committed an unforgivable sin against his own kind and was exiled from heaven, to wander the earth, some say he can be redeemed after the passage of two ages but fate has a strange way of dictating the future. Jesveril fell pregnant with his child, this sin stripped him of his celestial powers and he was no longer able to protect our people. Frightened their precious child would be discovered by the dark ones, they left, wandering the earth together but time was not kind to them, once his fate had become common knowledge they had to separate in a desperate attempt to protect the child. Vyvien was born healthy and Jesveril bore the burden of bringing a child up alone on a distant shore. On your mothers sixteenth birthday Tadge appeared on their doorstep, it was to be a passionate re-union, he vowed never to leave it so long next time before his return. My sister had hoped that Vyvien would carry the healing gene of our father but this was not to be, we all had hope when Christopher was born but No, the dilution with human flesh had pushed our dream further from reality. Then Julianne Serason was born………………” her voice trailed off.
“Who is that?” asks Jez.
He only knows me as Jol, I elbow him in the ribs, “It’s me, it’s my real name.”
“At first we believed the fate of our people was to die slowly, one by one, here in this land, then Jesveril sent word that she had witnessed great things from her granddaughter, from then on you became Jannes ore Luissenn - the chosen one.”
Jez looks confused, “I thought your name was Jol?”
Cooper continues, “Tadge was overjoyed with the news but careful to stay away, he did not want to alert the dark ones or his own kind as to where they could find you. Even before the coming of age you have shown great power within, I believe you know to what I refer?”
Jez was curious now, “What can you do?”
I wish he would shut up, having this double conversation was maddening, I don’t need him knowing my past on top of everything else, so I push his questioning aside and reply to Coopers question instead, “Yes”, “and that’s all I’m saying!”
Jez was hurt from the rebuff, I could tell, suddenly I can read his thoughts, bizarrely, but erect a barrier so he cannot read mine.
“It is unfortunate that you were just 17 when you arrived, it seems you may be ready though, the visit to Kamerrean has advanced your abilities. But I digress from your original question, the boy with
Al’ice now walks the path of the un-dead, the disease has returned to attack the young, without his powers he is unable to walk with his ancestors in Kamerrean, he is condemned to wander in what you would call purgatory.”
“I never saw anyone with Al’ice.”
“Ah but Jez, you have not yet completed the passage to adulthood, Kamerrean is a wondrous place and once experienced our kind are able to converse with and see those who have passed.”
“Hmmmmph!”
“So where has Al’ice taken him?” I ask.
“There has been a complication, Dallon’s death has upset Al’ice, they are very close. Tadge has the ability to save just one more soul within him and he vowed he would not waste that chance of life on anyone but his very own flesh and blood, Jannes ore Luissen. I have sent a message with Dallon, he has just five days to locate him.”
“How will he find this Tadge when it took so long for you and your sister to locate him?” asks Jez.
“Well Jez, that is the complication, Christopher’s lucky stone is only as such because it harbours Jol’s protection, there is a message within which once activated transmit’s a signal to Tadge warning him that his granddaughter has been or will be harmed. It appears the transmission has been activated, he will already be on his way, only he will not be expecting a mere mortal who he has no knowledge of to be carrying that message, this could have dire consequences.”
Oh shit! I remember Kate’s message, “I have put Kate in danger.”
“The demons may be after her, locate Kate and they will locate Tadge, it could be the end for both of them. Al’ice has taken Dallon on the path to finding to Kate, where he will deliver my message to Tadge when he arrives.”
“But what will happen to Dallon?” Jez and I both ask.
Cooper kneels down before me as if I were a queen, “Only you can decide his fate Jol, only you have the power to break Tadge’s promise and allow him to bring Dallon back to life, this is most important to Al’ice and he believes you will make the right decision, but of course it is your choice in the end.”
“I have to decide whether he lives or dies, of course I will say yes.”
It was getting hard to keep the barrier in place, hopefully Jez will have forgotten why I raised it in the first place. The minute I release the barrier, he’s there, “Think about what you’re saying, if anything happens to you then this Tadge can save you, if he wastes that on this boy……….”
“Jez don’t be so stupid, I can’t let the boy die, the decision would haunt me forever.”
My head is beginning to thump with the pressure.
“Are you ok, are you ill, you must tell me Jol?” presses Cooper.
“My head hurts, it will pass.”
“Too much information at once, this is a lot to take in, you must go and lie down” she commands.
“No wait, how will they find Kate, she is not at home.”
“Where is she?”
“I received a text, she was lost and needed help, I was worried about the demon, I told her to find Moana.”
“Who’s Moana?” asks Jez.
Cooper gave me a satisfied nod, “I know who she is, a wise choice young Jol, I am proud of you, I must go and find Al’ice, give him this news and of course I will see about your father too. Jez you are in charge now, keep an eye on Jol for me and Eldeen, if he should waken please give him a drop of this in his tea.”
Cooper took a small vial of liquid from her clothes and passed it to Jez, then put on her great cloak and grabbed hold of her Kalchi staff.
“Wait, give this to Dallon for Kate, she will know to trust him if he has this.”
I struggle to remove my mums signet ring from my finger it has become quite tight, so I try dipping my pinkie into the mug of cold tea to help loosen it. The band of gold inscribed with mums initials slips effortlessly from my finger aided by the tea, I hand it to Cooper.
As she turns to leave she adds, “you now know all of the truth, I am sorry for the way things have befallen, I would have liked to have met under happier circumstances.” She then steps out into the sunlight and is gone.
Jez and I both wonder at her words, did we really know the truth, no mention of where Gran was now, we are both sure there are more questions without answers.
I flop my head against his shoulder, “can we go outside Jez, I need some fresh air?”
Gentle sobs were waking Jez from his deep cold slumber. Hurt and pain filled the anguished sobs that tore at his heart. He wondered who it could be as he roused in the half light of the room. Listening intently to the sounds around him his senses picked up on shallow breathing in the room, the kind that rises and falls as you rest, a scratchy noise could be heard, up and down and across paper? It will be the nurse catching up on her notes, she gives a weary sigh. The room was almost silent except for the steady hum of the machines that prolonged life, the sobbing now ceased.
His eye was less sore tonight, carefully he peeked at his surroundings, the images fuzzy, the strip light above him flickered on its dull setting. Jez’s vision was limited to the range in the movement of his eyes, yet tonight he felt pain as if his neck were sore, the feeling was slowly coming back but dare he risk the nerve to move his head, no too risky he was not yet ready to reveal his conscious state, the memories in his dreams were not complete, he needed to know who he was before he confronted these strangers.
A feeling of un-easiness pricked at the hairs on the back of his neck awakening the nerves, had he been discovered? He closed his eyes and listened, nothing, he focussed on the slow drip, drip of the line pulsating into his arm, the life line that sustained him.
He was sure he was being watched, but why the silence? He could feel the burn of their stare, why did they not say anything? The confusion mingled with the steady drip, drip and lulled him into a restless slumber, a flash of slitted eyes crossed his vision for a second as the sobbing returned, not so obvious at first but it was there lingering in the back of his mind.