Ellie made a mental note to take great care not to see it. For the first time in her career, she vowed not to read that day’s edition of her beloved newspaper.
‘How are you feeling?’ Gemma flicked her hair back and took a seat by the bed.
‘Not too bad,’ Ellie replied carefully. The question of why Gemma had come still plagued her. Ellie wished Gemma would just get it off her chest. The sooner it was aired, the sooner she could leave. ‘My mum should be here soon and I should be cleared to go home later today,’ she added, hoping that the information would hurry Gemma along.
‘That’s great.’ Gemma paused. ‘I bet you’re wondering why I’ve come.’
Hallelujah! Ellie didn’t reply but gave a tight smile. It was the best she could manage and she hoped it would be enough encouragement for Gemma to reveal whatever had brought her there.
‘I wanted to thank you properly,’ Gemma began. ‘I know we’ve had our differences in the past, but that’s all history now, right?’
Ellie gave a brief nod.
‘But your help has brought me and Ben back together. That’s got to be the most amazing thing that anyone could have done for us. Ben, especially, is so grateful…’ Gemma paused, letting the emphasis of that last statement sink in. ‘Bless him, he really does love me to bits and without you doing your part to help him find me again he would have had to try and mend his shattered heart with someone who would always be second best…’ There was another pause while she fixed Ellie with a look that was so subtle but significant that Ellie could not fail to recognise the thinly veiled triumph. ‘You know what I mean?’ She smiled sweetly. Ellie wasn’t fooled for a moment. She knew exactly what Gemma meant.
‘I’m glad I could help,’ Ellie replied stiffly. Was that it? Could Gemma now please clear off?
‘Of course,’ Gemma added, seemingly oblivious to the insincerity in Ellie’s reply. ‘You’ll be the guest of honour at our wedding… After all, you made it happen.’
Ellie stared. As much as she had tried to hide her real feelings, for an instant every emotion was plainly displayed on her face. Wedding? They were really going to get married? Marriage was sacred, an incredible commitment that needed effort and selflessness; it was for life. Ellie had watched too many people she loved suffer from the after-effects of ill-advised matches. Why would they get married? Unless they really did love each other and Ellie was just seeing some skewed version of reality, entirely coloured by her own personal feelings and desires. Sensing Gemma watching for her reaction, she quickly gathered her wits again.
‘Congratulations,’ she managed to force out.
‘Thank you,’ Gemma said. ‘He proposed to me this morning in bed. Brought a tray in first thing with a heart shaped piece of toast on it, a glass of champagne and an envelope containing a diamond ring.’
Ellie’s gaze involuntarily flitted to Gemma’s left hand.
‘Oh,’ Gemma gave an affected laugh, seeing the reaction. ‘It’s too big, of course.’ She held up her hand to study it. ‘Most rings are, because my fingers are so slender. I have to get it altered before I can wear it.’
Ellie fought the lump rising in her throat. She glanced at the flowers and then back at Gemma. What was wrong with this boy? He’d sent her flowers, along with a note with an unmistakably romantic subtext, on the same morning he’d proposed to someone else. She should have seen the signs that Ben was a fruitcake the moment she came across him camped out on the corner of Constance Street. What on earth said emotional stability about that behaviour? It had to call into question Ellie’s own judgement that she had even considered a relationship with him. She thought all this, and she was certain that she was right. So why did it feel as though Gemma had just taken a mallet to her heart? She gave a jerky nod.
‘That’s marvellous news… really marvellous…’ The words almost ground out of her mouth. ‘I expect someone from the Echo will attend to report on the day, even if I’m not available myself.’
‘Oh, no,’ Gemma gushed with an earnestness that made Ellie suddenly want to throw up. ‘I insist it’s you. You’re our little good luck cupid.’
Ellie was silent for a moment. Her gaze wandered to the window. The room was high up and sky was all she could see, but the clouds that scudded across her view were heavy again with the promise of more rain. ‘I hope you won’t think I’m rude if I say that I’m exhausted and I could do with a rest. And my mum is due to visit soon too.’
Gemma rose gracefully from her chair and swung her jacket on. She gave Ellie a beatific smile that belied what Ellie had guessed was her true intent. She had come with this news, virtually straight from her early morning love-in with Ben. Ellie wondered if she had been the first person Gemma had run to with it, even before her own parents. The idea seemed a likely one. But the motive wasn’t a desire to share her happiness with the person who had played an instrumental part in making it happen – the real reason was far less pure. Ellie could feel guilty all she wanted about the conclusion she had come to, even about the way she had dreamt of them splitting up so that Ben would be single and available to date without remorse, but no matter how she weighed it up, the unsavoury conclusion was the only one that made sense. It was gamesmanship, nothing more, nothing less. And Gemma had just scored the winning point.
‘I’ll send your invite to the Echo offices, shall I?’ she called behind her as she headed for the door, shaking her glorious hair free from the confines of her jacket collar. There was no immediate reply, and Gemma didn’t bother waiting for one.
Ellie eased herself down the pillow. Gemma had left an hour ago, the nurse on duty popping her head in shortly afterwards to announce that she had never seen Ellie’s ‘sister’ leave. The lie had prompted a bitter smile from Ellie. She had to hand it to Gemma, she was a devious little bitch, but it got results. For the entire hour since, Ellie had been alone with her tumultuous thoughts about Ben and his unreliability. She had to conclude that he was just like every other man, and that she should learn to steer clear of them all. These thoughts were interspersed with vague musings about why her mum was so late. Visiting hours were almost over, and Miranda had been told that she didn’t need to adhere to them anyway, being next of kin. She also knew that she had to be on standby to accompany Ellie home in a taxi if she was discharged that day. So where was she? Had something happened to Hazel? The door to her room had remained open since Gemma’s departure, so that Ellie could easily see along the corridor, straight to the front desk of the ward. People came and went, but nobody for Ellie. She was beginning to feel something between abandonment and all-consuming worry and she didn’t like it at all.
As she lay propped up on her pillows, brooding on all this, she noticed a familiar figure approach the main desk on the ward outside. Her stomach tightened. What the hell was he doing here? To tell her about the wedding too? Perhaps she had been mistaken over the signals the flowers sent. Perhaps they were just a get-well wish. By now Ellie was so mixed-up she didn’t think it was wise to open her mouth to anyone at all – there was no telling what might come out.
Ben glanced down the corridor as he spoke to the nurse at the desk. Ellie turned away as he caught her eye, wishing desperately that the door to her room had been closed. Now he knew exactly where she was and that she was awake. He must have also seen the flowers displayed on the cabinet next to her bed. If she had possessed the strength at that moment, she would have hurled the damn things at him – vase, water and all.
‘Ellie, are you awake?’ the nurse asked as she hovered at the door.
Ellie turned her head, fighting back the tears that squeezed her throat. ‘I don’t feel so good.’
‘You have a visitor…’
‘I know. I’m too ill to see him.’
The nurse frowned. ‘You want me to turn him away?’
‘Yes. Visiting hours are almost over anyway, aren’t they?’
‘Yes, but –’
‘There’s no point in him coming in to see me then.’
‘You want me to tell him to come back later?’
Ellie turned away again. She couldn’t trust her expression not to betray the violent emotions bubbling inside her right now. The sight of Ben made her angry beyond reason and desperate with longing all at the same time. She couldn’t decide whether she wanted to bury herself in his embrace or punch him in the head.
‘Ellie… it’s up to you…’
‘No,’ Ellie replied in a low voice that she fought to keep level. ‘I don’t want him to come later.’
As she turned back, she could see that Ben was already making his way down the corridor towards her room. He couldn’t have been more than a few feet away. He shot her a puzzled glance, one that changed to obvious hurt as the nurse tactfully reworded Ellie’s request.
‘It’s alright,’ he said. ‘I heard what she said.’
The duty consultant’s ward round had arrived at Ellie’s bedside sometime around midday with the conclusion that he wasn’t quite happy enough with her progress to allow her to be discharged but hoped that the following day would be the one.
‘Looks like it’s Valentine’s dinner with us then,’ the nurse had quipped.
Ellie tried to return a smile, but it got stuck somewhere on its way to her face.
Not only had Gemma and Ben managed to completely destroy her life in ten traumatic minutes but now she was seriously worried about her mum’s non-appearance. Ellie had tried to call the house on a borrowed mobile phone but there was no reply. There was no reply from her dad or Hazel either, and no message left with the ward staff.
Ellie had been ready to ask again when her dad tumbled into the room, breathless and dishevelled, stress etched into every line of his face. Ellie pushed herself up rather too quickly, wincing as her battered body protested.
‘What’s the matter?’ she asked.
Frank gave her a pained stare, in his obviously distressed state all subtlety and tact forsaken. ‘It’s your aunt Hazel. She died this morning.’
Fourteen
‘What?’ Ellie repeated.
‘Hazel is dead.’
Ellie shook her head. ‘I heard you. I just…’
‘It’s hard to take in, isn’t it?’ He dropped into the seat by her bed and wiped a hand across his clammy forehead. ‘Your mum says she was with her last night after she left you here and although she was very ill, of course, she didn’t seem like she was about to fall off her perch or anything.’
Ellie ignored his unfortunate turn of phrase; she was used to her dad putting his foot in it. ‘You’ve seen Mum?’
‘I’ve been with her most of the day. She planned to see Hazel first thing and then come to see you. But when she let herself into Hazel’s house, Hazel was already…. well, it didn’t look as though she had lasted the night.’
Ellie’s mind flitted back to the last time she had seen Hazel. What had they talked about? Stuff that hadn’t mattered; stupid, pointless conversations to have been the last they would share. She should have treated every visit to her aunt as though it might have been her last, but somehow it hadn’t seemed possible that there wouldn’t be a next time. Now, there were things unsaid that could never be said.
‘Are you alright, love?’ Frank asked.
Ellie refocused on him. ‘Sorry… it’s just…’
‘I know.’ Frank placed his hand over hers.
Ellie had wanted to cry all day but had fought the tears back. Now, presented with something that was worth crying over, she felt only an overwhelming numbness. She stared at the window. Then she turned to her dad. Drops of water still clung to his woollen coat.
‘It’s raining?’ she asked vaguely, not knowing what else to say.
‘Ellie…’ He frowned. ‘Are you alright?’
She shook herself. ‘Yes. Is Mum OK?’
‘There’s no point in lying; she’s been better. I left her on the sofa asleep at her place. She had a terrible migraine from crying all day; blames herself for not being there in Hazel’s last moments. She wanted to come and see you too but I said I would come. I thought it would be better for me to tell you about Hazel while your mum was in such a state.’
Ellie nodded slightly. ‘Thanks, Dad.’
‘Are you coming out today?’ Frank asked. ‘Your mum said you might be. You should stop with one of us for a few days if you are, especially now.’
Ellie wished dearly that she could go to her mum right now. Miranda would need some comfort in the days ahead. ‘They won’t discharge me today, but maybe tomorrow. I’ll stay at Mum’s.’
‘You’ll be good for each other,’ he agreed.
‘It’s good that you were there for her, though.’
‘It’s at times like these when you realise what’s important.’ He patted her hand. ‘It’s just a shame that it took something so sad for your mum to see it. But if I can’t be around for my wife in her darkest hours, no matter what has gone on before, then what kind of man would I be?’
‘You’ll always be the perfect man to me.’
He smiled slightly. ‘I don’t think your mum would agree.’
‘What’s going to happen now?’
‘About Hazel?’
Ellie nodded.
‘I’m not entirely sure,’ he said, a frown furrowing his brow. ‘We’ve never lost anyone in this way before. Hopefully there won’t have to be a post-mortem and we can set everything in order quite quickly. She left very precise instructions for your mum for when the time came, so at least we have all her last wishes written down and the whereabouts of her will.’
‘She wanted one of those forest burials – she told me that once.’
‘I believe so. Your mum mentioned it. I think Hazel arranged it all too, bless her, when she knew the end was coming, so that’s a big weight from your mum’s shoulders.’
‘She was alone when it happened,’ Ellie murmured. ‘Somebody should have been there. If I hadn’t been stuck in here, maybe me or Mum would have been.’
Frank stood and curled an arm around his daughter. ‘You can’t think like that; that’s what I keep telling your mum. At least she was at home.’
Ellie let her head fall onto his chest. It was a long time since he had held her like this. She suddenly felt twelve again, secure in the knowledge that whatever else happened in life, her daddy would always keep her safe. They stayed that way, and Ellie lost track of the minutes as she savoured the feeling. Right now, it was a place she could gladly get lost in. In two days, fate had thrown a lifetime of challenges at her. A tiny island of calm, safe in her father’s arms, was the best she could hope for, and she clung to it like a shipwrecked child clinging to driftwood.
Eventually, his voice broke in on her thoughts, resonating through his chest as her ear lay against it.
‘Your mum says you were fretting about not having a phone yesterday.’
She pulled away to look at him. ‘It doesn’t seem very important now, does it?’
‘Maybe. But I could pick up a new one if you like. What model do you want?’
‘It’s very sweet of you, but it’s OK. I’ll get one when I’m out of hospital.’
‘It’s no bother. I bet it’s driving you mad not being contactable.’
‘I’m stuck in hospital. I’m fairly contactable for anyone who wants to find me,’ Ellie replied. It seemed, if the evidence of the morning was anything to go by, that she had been a bit too contactable.
He frowned slightly.
‘Sorry, Dad. I didn’t mean that to come out the way it did. I can manage without a phone for a little longer.’
He kissed her on the forehead. ‘I want to get one. Consider it my treat for the way you’ve stuck by me, even though I’ve been a complete pain in the neck. Besides, your mum will feel better if she can get hold of you easily over the next few days.’
Ellie sighed. ‘Alright. I’ll let you get one but I’m paying you back when I’m home.’
He smiled. ‘We’ll see about that.’
As soon as h
er dad had left (at Ellie’s insistence that her mum needed him far more than she did) the tears that wouldn’t come in his presence suddenly surged forwards in a tidal wave of emotion. And once Ellie started to cry she couldn’t stop. She had never felt so completely undone as she did at that moment. But as the tears stuttered out and quiet exhaustion took their place, one sliver of light shone out from the darkness. The first person her mum had turned to in her hour of need was her dad. He’d said they spent most of the day together. Perhaps they were on their way to reconciliation after all.
The evening brought Patrick, and Ellie wept again as she recounted the day’s events. And although she had vowed not to tell anyone else her feelings for Ben, the sheer weight of emotion forced the admission to tumble from her lips and the whole tale came out.
When she had finished, Patrick stood and inspected the flowers and Ben’s note. ‘As far as getting a date is concerned, sending the woman in question flowers whilst simultaneously getting engaged to someone else isn’t the most conventional route.’
Ellie gave him a watery smile. ‘It doesn’t matter. Gemma is back now and he’s all loved up. Do you think our suspicions about her are unreasonable?’
Patrick blew out a long breath. ‘I’ve a feeling they’re more than reasonable. From what I’ve heard, she’s ringing around every radio station, newspaper, and TV show she can think of. Let’s face it, he’s become a ticket to fame and money.’
‘Then I feel even more stupid for being so obsessed with him,’ Ellie said miserably. ‘How can he not see her for what she really is? And why am I dumb enough to fancy a man who can’t see her for what she is?’
‘You know what they say about love and its relationship with visual impairment. Though I think you’ll find there’s more to it than first appearances.’
‘What do you mean?’
‘When you see him doing his little TV stunts, he doesn’t seem like a man whose garden is entirely rosy. I’d say he was a man who’d discovered the rose bushes were full of thorns and greenfly.’
Worth Waiting For: A heart-warming and feel-good romantic comedy Page 21