I put my mask back on. “I liked your ideas today, Victoria. But I asked you not to come to work today. You need to obey me.”
“Yes, William,” she whispered.
I stood up and walked over to her. “Hey,” I lifted her chin, forcing her to look at me again. “I really liked your ideas. Nice work.”
“I’m glad. I was excited to share them with you. I’m sorry I disobeyed you.”
“I guess it wasn’t so bad,” I smirked, trying to make her feel better. God, she had really crawled under my skin.
“Who is that with you in that picture?” She pointed to a very small frame I had, tucked off in the corner of my filing cabinet. I turned around to look at a picture of a happier time, before my mother got completely lost inside the bottle, before my father got sick, had finally had enough, and left us, before it happened, the irrevocable it that changed my life forever. I turned back to look into her searching eyes. “Is that you and your mother? How old were you?”
I don’t know why I actually started to answer, but I did. “Yes. It is my mother. I was eight when that picture was taken.”
“Is she still alive?”
I found it an odd question and yet, again, I found myself answering. “Yes. She is.”
“Are you close?”
“No, Victoria. We are not. And presently, I’d rather not discuss my mother. You. Today. Disobeying. That is what we should be discussing.”
She nodded slowly, embarrassed, realizing she might be crossing some imaginary line. And she was.
“May I ask you a different question then instead?” She struggled to look me in the eyes.
Now what, I thought. “Sure,” I said simply, a little exasperated.
“Why? Why didn’t you want me to come in here today, to the office?” She paused searching my eyes for answers. “Because…because of…Olivia?”
And then it hit me. I had to stop giving her these false hopes. Talking about my mother, answering questions about Olivia. She was my PA and nothing more. No matter what I may have been feeling, the truth remained. I couldn’t get too emotionally involved or invested. “Victoria, stop. You have to remember your place. This has to stop.”
“What has to stop?” She squeezed her hands, trying to fight for control of herself.
I didn’t know how to respond. Who was I really talking to? Her or myself? Every time I made a pact with myself, I went against it. Maybe if I distanced myself that would work. Obviously, having her in my bed didn’t work to get her out of my system. Maybe staying away from her altogether finally would. I had to try something. I certainly couldn’t continue like this.
“Your jealousy, Victoria. That has to stop. I can fuck anyone I want. You and I…We are not a couple. You know that.”
Her lower lip trembled and she bit it.
“Enjoy your dinner with Mark tonight,” I said abruptly. “I need to get back to work.”
“I…” I didn’t know what she was about to say, but I looked at her with a glare and she stopped.
“Take tomorrow off from work; work on the proposal from the house. I don’t want you here until Friday to present.” I softened when I could see how hurt she felt. “You’re really smart, Victoria. You’re the best PA I’ve ever had.” In every way, I thought to myself. “I’d like this to work out,” I added.
She stood and walked to the door. “Thank you for the opportunity,” she said resignedly and closed the door quietly behind her.
Chapter Twelve
I had taken Olivia out to a ridiculously expensive dinner and I drank too much. By my third scotch, she finally caught on that something was wrong.
“What is it, William? Have I done something wrong?”
I downed my drink. “Work,” I lied. “I’m sorry. Can I see you this weekend? I have an important meeting Friday that is occupying my mind.”
“Is it the Pierce building?” she enquired.
“Yes.” I flagged down the waiter.
She was beautiful in a perfect kind of way, and I should have been content with her. However, I was anything but. She grabbed my hand. “This doesn’t have anything to do with your new assistant, Victoria, does it?”
“Of course not,” I snapped. “Olivia, even if it were about her, which it isn’t, you know what you and I and what we are not. You know where we stand.” She looked as if I had slapped her. She looked as if she might cry. And cry was something I had never, ever seen Olivia do. I don’t know why I was taking that tone with her, but I couldn’t help it. I was simply irritated, irritated that I knew Victoria was out with Mark somewhere having dinner, irritated that I couldn’t stop thinking of her when this beautiful woman sat before me, irritated that I simply wasn’t myself. Somehow, I was changing. I could lie all day long to myself, but deep down, I knew the truth.
“I see…” she stammered.
“Olivia.” I kissed her knuckles. “Don’t get emotional on me. That is the one thing I’ve counted on with you. I’m sorry I’m in such a bad mood. I will make it up to you this weekend.”
Her eyes were glassy. Jesus fucking Christ. “Okay, William. You’re right.”
I didn’t dare say anything else. I drove her home and gave her an obligatory kiss. Alone in my car, I checked my cell. I knew I was hoping for a message from Victoria. Mark even. To know their date had ended. But the only messages awaiting me were the pandering of those who wanted an answer about their proposals.
I arrived home and when I walked through the door I saw that Jennifer was with Samantha. They were both surprised to see me. Jennifer came out to greet me quickly, asked if I needed anything, and went back to her date. I casually asked if she had heard from Victoria, but the only answer I got was a sideways glance. She knew. If anyone knew, it would be Jennifer.
I made myself another drink, bad idea, went to the living area, and waited and waited and waited. It appeared she wasn’t coming home. It was well after midnight. Where the fuck was she? The contract stipulated that she be at my beck and call. It was terms for dismissal, and I seriously considered it as the clock taunted me with its slow, agonizing tick-tock.
But I realized I told her to go with him. I told her to work with him on the proposal. She was doing exactly what I asked her to do. She had obeyed me. If I found out she had fucked him, though, that would be grounds for dismissal. The contract was clear about monogamy and sexual partners. She was not to have any for her duration of my employment.
The thought of her writhing underneath another man inflamed me to such a degree, I felt like I needed to punch something. I needed to go for a run, but my drinking had eliminated any chance of that.
I pictured Mark, how he looked at her. How clear it was that he was attracted to her, more than attracted. I think he liked her. Adored her even. She was beautiful, that was clear. Innocent and sweet, no doubt. But it was her intelligence. She was smart as fuck. And talented. Christ. Not that I was some pianist aficionado, but I had never been in the presence of such raw talent. She deserved to be happy. I needed to leave her the fuck alone.
I heard keys at the door as I sat in the oversized leather chair by one of the many restored fireplaces. Fuck. I didn’t want her to see me, basically waiting up for her. I grabbed the nearest stack of papers I should have been working on, threw on my glasses, and feigned interest in them. I eavesdropped. Mark was still with her. The bastard.
“Walking me to the door was not necessary. Thank you, Mark. I am fine. Thank you for a wonderful dinner. I think another night like this and we should finish for Friday. No problem. We make a good team.”
“I hope so. He hasn’t been himself lately. I’m not sure why he wants to rush this thing. We have a couple weeks. But your idea is solid, Victoria. Once I put the numbers together, it will be a no-brainer.”
“Thanks, Mark. I hope so.”
“But what about playing, Victoria? I really need someone to start no later than next week. This week is too much, I know. I can go another week. But I’d like to put out the PR, the fl
yers. I’d like you to be a part of it. Are you still interested?”
“Yes,” she breathed. I couldn’t help but hear that desire in her voice, the same desire I heard in her when she was beneath me, when I kissed her, when I sucked and licked her. Jesus. I shook my head. Was she falling for Mark? Or was it merely the thought of playing again that heated her?
There was silence. What the fuck? Was he kissing her?
“Mark. I don’t think that is a good idea. We need to keep things business, especially if I’m going to play at your club. I’m…I’m sort of attached to someone else.”
I heard a huge exhale from Mark. “Jesus, Victoria. I’m sorry. I didn’t know.”
“It’s okay. Really. I hope this doesn’t affect our friendship, our working relationship.”
“No. No. Of course not.” He paused. “God, I feel like such an ass,” he tried to laugh, to make light of his embarrassment. “Of course you would have a boyfriend.”
Victoria laughed. “Boyfriend may be a bit too strong of a word. But I am loyal, for the time being anyway. You’re kind, Mark, and highly attractive. But I may actually be falling in love with him.”
“Friends then?” he asked.
“Without question. I need a friend. I feel alone. I really have no real friends to speak of.”
“Well, count on it. Maybe more someday if this someone doesn’t love you back.”
I heard a kiss. On the lips? The cheek? I was infuriated at once, but also worried. Was she talking about me? About falling in love with me? Fuck. Or was she playing Mark to get him off her back? Either way, it only solidified that I needed to leave her alone. I wondered if I should let her go early, as soon as the Pierce building was negotiated.
She let the door close behind her, and I heard her sigh. There would be no way she wouldn’t see me as she walked up to her room. The fact that I wanted her to come to me in that moment surprised me. It was like I couldn’t fucking control a thing I did anymore. I had just vowed to leave her alone, and my finger crooked her to come to me the minute she was in my view.
“William? Hi,” she said, a little startled. I saw desire fill her eyes. She started over to me. What choice did she have? She was at my beck and call for crying out loud. “Why are you up?” She saw all my papers. “Oh…guess we both have a lot of work on our plate.”
“Sit.” I demanded, motioning to my lap.
“Have you been drinking? Alone?” She sat down on my lap and it was the first time I noticed the bags under her eyes. It made me feel sorry for her, for the demands I had been making on her.
“Yes. But not alone. Not entirely anyway,” I admitted.
“Oh.” She blinked and hesitated. “Olivia?”
“Yes,” I admitted again, but before I could stop myself, I drew her in my arms, and she didn’t fight it. Instead she almost purred and snuggled into me. I kissed the top of her head. What the fuck was wrong with me? “I want you in my bed tonight, Victoria.” I stated simply.
She startled.
“To sleep,” I said, surprising even myself. “You look exhausted. I want you to sleep. I want to take care of you tonight.”
She grabbed me around my neck and it was like she was trying to crawl into me. “God. William. You are so confusing.”
“Take off your clothes,” I ordered.
“But…I thought…”
“I just want to look at you. That’s all.”
She stood up and complied, slowly. I didn’t know if she was purposely teasing me, but I enjoyed her slow, tantalizing strip tease. I had to see her. I wasn’t going to torment her but I couldn’t let her sleep any way but naked next to me.
She stood naked, a slight shiver to her body as the fire illuminated her white, perfect skin. A sadistic smile formed on my lips. I couldn’t help it. Her body was white as snow but for her tortured, pink, still inflamed nipples from the torment I had inflicted on them the night before.
Not tonight. The poor thing needed sleep. And I somehow wanted to give her that comfort. I somehow wanted to care for her. I was uncomfortable feeling this way, but my alcoholic stupor didn’t let me think straight. I could blame it on the alcohol later. Right then, I wanted to console her.
She shifted embarrassed. She wanted to cover up. My stare told her she wasn’t allowed.
“Come,” I finally said, putting her out of her misery and drew her back onto my lap. She burrowed her head into my neck, like a tiny animal and it made me smile somehow.
“Do you have siblings, William?” she asked, catching me off guard. She always caught me off guard.
I paused and spoke slowly. “I did. Yes. One.”
She picked up her head and looked into my eyes. I knew she wanted more.
“He only lived for three days. I never knew him. I was only six years old.”
“Oh my god, William. I am so sorry.”
“Don’t be. Like I said. I didn’t know him, but…”
“But?” She was tentative but persistent.
“It changed my mother. And not for the better.”
“But that picture. In your office. You looked happy in that with her and you said you were eight…”
“Enough, Victoria.” I couldn’t believe I was letting her in. I couldn’t. I couldn’t let anyone know. I couldn’t change who I really was. Still, I wanted to take care of her tonight. Comfort her. That I couldn’t change. “Go wash up and meet me in my bed. I want you well rested. I can’t have you getting ill on me. I need you sharp. I need you doing your best work for Friday.”
“Yes, William,” she said slowly rising. And she turned to go without another word. I could tell she was scared, almost as if she didn’t trust me. Could I blame her? Could I trust myself to be kind to her?
Within ten minutes, she met me in my bedroom, dressed in a beautiful, silk pink nightie that made my cock jump to life in an alarming way. Sometimes when I drank that much alcohol, it kept my kink at bay. Not with Victoria. Was I really going to be able to keep my hands off of her?
I lifted the covers up for her. “Take it off,” I ordered. “I want to feel your whole body next to me.”
Her chest heaved. She was so fucking sexy, so timid and uncertain of my true intentions. She removed the gown and came under the covers next to me. Her trepidation was visible. I thought I could hear her rapid heartbeat, her pulse too fast.
“Sssh, Victoria. You can relax. I promise.” I wrapped my arms around her waist, drawing her back against my chest, as I inhaled, nuzzling my nose against the softness of her hair. She had to have felt my erection.
“Sleep, sweet girl. As late as you want. Sleep with me.”
She moaned and almost whimpered. “Oh William. What are you doing to me?”
Damn it if I knew. Probably crushing her, as I always knew I would, and it made me feel sick to my stomach, truth be told.
“Sssh.” I simply repeated. “Sleep. You need it.”
“I’m not sure I can right now.”
“Yes you can. You can trust me.” I reassured her. I hated that she didn’t trust me. It was my own fucked-up doing.
“I mean…it’s not that. I want you.” she said.
And it made me laugh. It was so unexpected. “Clearly, I feel the same way.” I pushed my throbbing cock against her ass and back. ”Let me make sweet love to you then. I mean it. Soft. Sweet. Like you. And then sleep.”
“Yes,” she exhaled sharply. “Yes.”
I smiled into the side of her neck, slowly lifting her out of the way to kiss her pulse, to nibble on her earlobes. I drew my fingers down her shivering belly into the folds of her pussy to find her, as usual, dripping wet for me. “Jesus, Victoria. You’re always so ready for me.” My cock pulsed at the realization of her deep desire for me.
“I know,” she said. “I hate myself for it. I have no control over it.” She was panting.
“Lie down. Spread your legs for me. Calm down. I want to be gentle. Let me be gentle for you.”
A tear streamed down her face, a
nd had I not been so drunk, I would have stopped. This wasn’t fair to her. The false hope, the craziness of my behavior, the gentle tenderness I showed her right then. I couldn’t stop myself.
I brought my cock in my hand and lightly, gently stroked the head of it over her slit, up and down, hypnotizing her. “Lie still,” I ordered, as I teased her with the strokes of my cock.
She was creamy wet and I slowly began to push into her, very, very slowly. I wanted to savor every inch of her hot, tight hole.
In and out, I methodically fucked her, as slow as was humanly possible. “Still,” I ordered again, as I felt every inch of my cock enter her, and every inch slowly exit.
She was trying to push me to go faster, she raised her hips, to meet my thrust, her pants becoming small cries. “Please. William. Faster!”
“Sssh, baby. Slow and steady wins the race. I want to feel every inch of you. Slowly. Gently. Relax. Let me take my time.”
And so I went. It felt so fucking unbelievable. My cock was so hard, and yet at this pace I could go all night. And I knew I shouldn’t. That I had promised her rest.
“Oh,” she whimpered. “Please…”
I stayed hovered over her, my arms pushed up on either side of her, as I methodically pushed in and out until I realized she was losing her mind. And I couldn’t help but smile.
“God, this feels so good. You feel so good.”
I took pity on her and began to thrust into her a little faster and a little harder, until I was at the edge.
I flipped her on her side, removing myself from her for the briefest of seconds, to reposition her body so I could enter her from the side, positioning her leg so that I could rub her swollen, pretty clit. I fucked her intensely and held her clit between my thumb and forefinger, as I felt all her signs that she was nearing that same edge. I pulled back a little.
“Let me hear you. Beg me, baby,” I growled in her ear.
“Please, William. Please. Don’t tease me tonight. You promised.”
“Beg me,” I said. “In earnest.” I twirled her clit between my fingers.
THORNE: Rose's Dark Contract Page 12