“Is there any more news?” Sutton’s voice interrupted my thoughts.
I turned slowly, preparing myself for the pain that had etched itself into her face lately. She didn’t deserve this. Claire and her family didn’t deserve any of this. They were good people, but criminals didn’t care if someone was an outstanding citizen.
“Not yet, but I promise I’ll let you know. Brian is a man of action, so we should have an update shortly.” A sharp pang stabbed my chest. Although I’d just kept information from her, I wasn’t at liberty to share it. This was the part I hated about my job.
She rubbed her arms and shivered.
“I can turn on the fire for us,” I offered. There were three gas fireplaces in the house, and one was in my new bedroom.
“In the living room?” she asked.
“Anywhere you’re comfortable.”
“That sounds nice.” Her breathtaking blue eyes were rimmed with red and slightly swollen from crying. I resisted the overwhelming urge to hold her.
“Would you like a glass of wine or a soda to drink?” I asked, walking toward her. I stopped mere inches away, took her small hand in mine, and smoothed her hair from her face. I’d already crossed lines with her I wouldn’t have with any other client, but we had a past. An intimate history. The longer I was with her, the more difficult it was not to touch her.
“Come here.”
She nestled up to me, and I embraced her. I inhaled slowly and breathed her in as her arms slipped around my waist. She was intoxicating, even under the dark circumstances.
“Did you get any rest?” I asked.
“A little. My mind keeps spinning out of control with thoughts of … if she’s still alive or has she been beaten and raped—”
“Hey.” I grabbed her shoulders and pulled her away from me. “Look at me, Sutton. You can’t do that. You’ll just fuck yourself over. It will drain all your energy, and I need you with me. All right?”
She pursed her lips and nodded in response.
“I’m right here.” I stroked her cheek with the pad of my thumb.
A tear spilled over, and I wiped it away. “For how long?”
My breath caught in my chest. “For however long it takes.” It was the truth. I’d be with her until Claire was safely returned or we found out … I couldn’t even bear to think it.
“As a bodyguard or my friend?” She was not letting this go.
A smile pulled at the corner of my mouth. “I guess some things never change. You’re still persistent.”
She cracked a sad grin and released a heavy sigh. I took her hand and guided her into the living room.
“Sit.” I directed her to the sofa. I flipped the switch on the fireplace, and in seconds it roared to life. “What would you like to drink? Wine?”
“Do you have a Riesling?” she asked.
“I’ll check. What’s your second choice if not?”
“Jack and Coke.” She chewed on her fingernail, a habit she’d had for years. “Ya know, screw the wine. If you have Jack and Coke, I think I need something stronger tonight.”
“You got it.” I paused for a moment, my eyes searching her. Sutton was strong physically and mentally, but right now she appeared fragile. Since I was part of the problem as well as the solution, I wasn’t sure how to make it better for her. There was no denying my presence brought back memories, both painful and positive. At the same time, Sutton knew she could trust me. And that outweighed our past together. I set off to make our drinks, my mind scrambling for answers of how to ease her pain. I just wanted her to find peace. But that wasn’t going to be possible until her sister was found, and the family could move on one way or the other.
A few minutes later, I handed Sutton a whiskey and cola and joined her on the couch.
“Are you warming up?” I asked.
“Yeah, thank you.” She took a healthy swig, then leaned back on the sofa. “I see you’re still a scotch drinker.” She rolled her head toward me.
“It’s my go-to, I guess. Dad has a good collection of alcohol, so anything you want, let me know.”
We sat in comfortable silence and watched the fire’s blue and orange flames flicker. I was surprised when she asked for another drink, but it spoke volumes of where she was mentally. Not doing well.
A minute later, I returned with a refilled glass for her. “Have you eaten anything?” I asked.
“Yeah, Vaughn makes sure I eat, even if it’s just something light.”
“Good.” I settled in on the sofa again, observing her. The alcohol was obviously taking effect from the way her shoulders had relaxed, and her expression had lost a lot of its intensity.
“Pierce,” she whispered.
My body responded immediately to her soft tone. She used to whisper my name precisely like that while we made love …
I stretched my arm out on the back of the sofa and played with a few strands of her hair. She was my kryptonite, my weakness, and if we were in the same room, I struggled to keep my distance. Sutton scooted over and leaned against me. My arm automatically rested around her shoulders. Her chin tipped upward, her blue eyes gentle as she gazed up at me.
“I’m sorry about your dad, and I’m a selfish brat,” she said. “I’m so glad you’re here. Even with everything we’ve gone through together, I still trust you and the guys implicitly. I know what you’re made of. I know that you’ll protect me with your own life, and not even hesitate to take down whoever has Claire.”
Fuck. I placed my scotch on the end table and cupped her chin. My heart pounded against my chest, and the only thing I wanted at this moment was her.
“Sutton, no one will touch you. You’re safe. And if they do, I’ll fucking bury them.” I growled that vow protectively. “I’ll move heaven and earth for you.”
Her eyes widened with my words. My fingers trailed down her cheek as she pressed into me. Her breasts grazed my side, and I fought the urge to scoop her up in my arms, take her to my bed, and ravish every part of her.
“I had no idea at first ... it's so easy to make someone into who you want them to be in your own mind. You'd been gone so long. I wasn't sure when you arrived in Portland, and I’d shown up out of the blue, what to expect, what might happen …” She took another drink and fixated on her glass. “It didn’t take long before I saw the man I’ve always cared about. He’s still there. And yes, you’re somewhat different, grown, and you’re scarier.” She laughed half-heartedly. “But I know who you are. You say you’re different, darker. Probably, but I see all the light in you, too.”
She peered up at me, and my heart stuttered. No one had ever come close to what she made me feel, like a better man than I really was. Her chest rose and fell with each breath, her eyes filled with desire. Jesus, I wanted to kiss her, but I wasn’t sure I’d stop once my mouth was on her.
“Sutton.” My voice was low and gravelly. “I can’t promise you anything except I’ll keep you safe, and if the FBI needs me, I’ll help them find Claire.”
“I know. You have so much to deal with. Your dad, your company, so many changes.” She placed her drink on the corner table next to mine and slid into my lap, straddling me.
My hands went instinctively to the curve of her waist. She bent her head to my ear. “No promises and no strings, not tonight. I want to forget all the insanity going on for a while,” she whispered.
I moaned, my hips immediately arching upward.
“Are you sure?” I asked.
“Yes.” She hesitated right before her full, beautiful mouth touched mine.
I searched her eyes while she looped her hand around my neck. She wanted me as much as I wanted her, but it was a bad mixture. Alcohol, fear, desire, and unresolved feelings.
In one swift motion, I picked her up and placed her on the couch. Her features clouded immediately with disappointment and rejection.
“You know I care about you. If I take you to my bed tonight, it will complicate things. I can’t hurt you again, Sutton.”
She glowered at me, her eyes brimming with tears, her chin quivering. “You just did."
Fuck. No matter what I said or did, I continued to make it worse for her. Guilt washed over me as I handed the whiskey and Coke to her, grabbed my drink, and left the room. Maybe a shower would help at least part of my body. I knew the minute I tried to protect her heart from me, I’d break it at the same time. But once sex was involved, all the feelings between us would be magnified. A part of me wondered if she wanted me, or if I would be a distraction from Claire. I suspected both. It was just how people worked. Anything to ease the pain.
I downed my scotch and closed my bedroom door behind me. The only thing I knew was my cock was screaming at me. Tossing my clothes on the floor while I meandered toward the bathroom, I wrapped my hand around my dick. My mind overflowed with thoughts of Sutton’s mouth sucking me. My tongue inside her.
Goddammit. I pushed on the handle, let it warm up, and stepped inside, reaching for the soap. I lathered up and stroked my throbbing shaft. Leaning one arm against the wall, the hot water streamed over my arms, chest, and stomach as I imagined her perky breasts pressed against me. My eyes fluttered closed, and I firmly stroked the length of my dick, recalling her soft wet pussy wrapped around me years ago. Jesus. I quietly moaned her name while I came. I rested my forehead against the shower wall and collected my thoughts. My body was still pissed at me for not taking her up on the offer, but I knew I’d made the right choice. But did she know as well?
Chapter 16
I tossed and turned all night in my bed. One minute I was thinking of Sutton on my lap and the next about the information Brian had shared with me concerning Claire. From the look on Sutton’s face, she hadn’t understood why I’d refused her offer. Hell, I wasn’t sure either. Well, my dick wasn’t, but my head was. We were both emotional and vulnerable right now. But it didn’t stop me from wondering if there was a possibility we might be able to have a second chance. Although I’d tried to keep my walls in place, I was failing miserably. If our feelings did progress, it had to be from the right place inside us, not because we were broken or desperate. One thing I was certain of about Sutton, she hated waiting on the sidelines like the rest of us.
I pulled on a Big Bang Theory T-shirt and stepped into my jeans. Someday I’d have to return to my suits, but for now, I was enjoying my casual look.
Glancing at my phone, I noted the time, then returned it to my pocket. I suspected I’d find Redd in the kitchen cooking breakfast. The second my bedroom door opened, my nose confirmed my suspicion. The aroma of bacon and eggs welcomed me. My mouth watered as I made my way to the food.
“Man, I’ll need a good workout after this,” I said, joining Redd and Sutton. I hopped onto the barstool and eyed the stack of French toast, scrambled eggs, and bacon.
“That sounds great,” Sutton said, tipping the bottle up and drizzling syrup across her French toast.
I didn’t miss the fact she refused to look at me. Although I’d not meant to, I’d hurt her last night, but if we’d slept together, and I apologized for my mistake this morning … she’d never forgive me.
Redd turned toward me, loaded my plate with fresh eggs, and cocked an eyebrow at me.
“I have a gym.” I grabbed a piece of crispy, hot bacon and shoved it into my mouth. Damn, I was hungry.
“You do?” Sutton asked, hopeful and finally making eye contact with me.
“Yeah. You and Redd can use it whenever. Just don’t go alone and tell me when you use it. Promise?”
“I can’t even have an hour workout to myself?” She stuck her lower lip out.
Dammit, she had no idea what that did to me. I shifted in my seat to relieve the pressure on my throbbing dick.
“No,” I replied.
Sutton rolled her eyes at me, and I barked out a laugh. She’d not done that since high school, when she was trying to get her way about something and it wasn’t working. Like now.
“Let’s finish eating, and I’ll show you the gym.”
* * *
“Are you coming or not?” I called over my shoulder. Redd and I were waiting by the front door for Sutton.
“Yes! I’m right behind you.” She hurried toward us in a tiny purple workout bra and matching bootie shorts.
Dammit, was she doing this on purpose since I’d told her no last night? I spun around toward the door and tried my damnedest to ignore her clothing, or lack of, but I didn’t miss Redd’s low chuckle. I hoped he was enjoying the entertainment and my torture.
I led them down the corridor and stopped at the next apartment. “Isn’t this someone’s home?” Sutton tilted her head in question.
I tapped in the code and flung the door open. “No. After you.” I motioned them inside.
The lights came to life as we entered, and Sutton’s jaw dropped open with surprise.
“Sweet!” Redd rubbed his hands together with excitement.
“Are you kidding me?” She noted the equipment and the wall of training weapons. Sutton practically darted toward the nunchaku and lifted them off the hooks. She peeked at me for permission, and I nodded.
“Wish me luck. It’s been a few years since I’ve messed around with them.” For the first time since she’d been with us, her expression lit up. She took it slow at first, but her skills came back almost immediately. Sutton sank into a stance and played with figure eights, arm rolls, then stepped it up to hand rolls.
Redd’s laugh split the silence. “Man, you’re so smooth! I was always busting the hell out of myself with those things.”
My gaze never left her as she continued. I wasn’t sure what turned me on more, the fact she could fight or how fucking gorgeous she was.
“You should hire me, Pierce. I could be a bodyguard.” She wiggled her eyebrows at me.
Startled from her suggestion, I backed away. No way in hell would I put her in danger. I’d never forgiven myself for what I’d done the last time, but I’d promised I wouldn’t do it again.
Sutton’s sticks slowed to a halt while her attention bounced between Redd and me. Redd gave her a half-shrug, feigning complete innocence. He knew the idea wouldn’t settle well with me.
“Don’t let her out of your sight.” I did an about-face and stormed out. A cold feeling coursed through my body as memories of Connor flooded my mind, of how I’d failed him. There was no way I’d be all right with Sutton working for me. Even though she had the skill, skill didn’t make up for everything. The tattoos inked on my skin for everyone I’d lost confirmed it.
I made a beeline for the library and my laptop. Forcing my mind back on work, I flipped through the security feed at Sutton’s place. An idea nudged me, and before I talked myself out of it, I searched the network and located what I’d suspected were everywhere on this floor. Cameras. I’d not bothered looking before since I didn’t want to spy on my friends. Until now. With a tap of a button, the connection flickered to life, and I was watching and listening to Redd and Sutton. My conscience shook a finger at me, shaming me for viewing a private conversation, but my curiosity won over.
“Shit. He’s still moody.” Sutton blew a strand of hair away from her face. My gaze drifted down her sculpted body. Guilt gnawed at me for eavesdropping, but I needed to understand what was going on with her. Why would she think I’d be okay with her working as a bodyguard for me?
“Yeah, he is.” Redd sauntered over to the heavy bag and gave it a solid punch. “Sutton?”
“Vaughn?” Her gaze focused on his powerful muscles while he punched the bag half-heartedly.
A sharp pang of jealousy reared up inside me. Was she checking him out? Had I misunderstood her advances last night, and she’d only been drunk?
“You two are both fucked up,” Redd said.
I leaned closer to the screen, my attention moving back and forth between them.
Sutton placed her hand on her hip and smirked at him. “Thanks for that.”
“No, I mean …” He backed away from the bag and gr
abbed some boxing gloves.
Sutton strolled toward him and helped slip them on. “What were you going to say?” she asked him.
“Yeah, what were you going to say, Redd?” I muttered. Did I really want to know? Probably not, but I wasn’t exiting out of the camera, either.
He punched the bag a few times, then focused on her, his hands falling to his sides.
“Pierce will fucking kill me if he finds out I’m having this conversation with you, but you need to know. He’s balls deep in love with you, Sutton. And, I strongly suspect you’re still in love with him. I realize you both are going through hell, but … I needed you to understand that no matter what he says, you own him. I totally get he’s here to protect you, but please be careful with my man’s heart. It’s as fragile as yours is. I love both of you, and I’d like things to end better than they did the last time.”
A deep frown etched itself into her forehead.
“Yeah, well, if you’re right —”
“I know I’m right,” Redd interrupted.
“He certainly didn’t act like that last night.”
“Oh? What happened?”
Redd seemed way too eager to hear about it.
“I might … might have made a drunken pass at him.” She cringed.
Redd laughed. “Both, and I mean both of you, are fucked up.” He snickered, then landed a few jabs to the bag. Sutton held it for him, and he fired off a round of punches.
“No way is he going to take advantage of you while your drunk. Please tell me you didn’t get your feelings hurt over that? He did the right thing.”
“You have no idea what it does to a girl’s self-esteem when a guy turns her down.”
Redd backed up and dropped his hands. “What?” He frowned at her. Hard.
“I’m serious. Men live to have sex.” Sutton huffed. “It’s scientifically proven that men think about sex a million times a day.”
“Only a million?”
“Think about it for a minute, and you might learn something about women.”
He wasn’t the only one that might learn a few things. I propped my chin on my fisted hand and continued to listen.
Twisted Intentions: Westbrook Security Bodyguard Book 1 Page 10