by Karr, Kim
“She’s having a panic attack. My mother had them all the time,” Will, who always manages to remain calm, tosses over his shoulder before quickly refocusing on me. “Just breathe, Charlotte, in and out. You’re okay. We’re here for you. You have nothing to worry about.” Will continues to talk to me in a soothing tone, all the while he draws in air before letting it out, as if trying to teach me how to breathe again.
And as the student, I mimic him. Slowly, my stiffened body relaxes and my vision is once again normal.
Jake is frozen at the end of the bed and I have to say, I don’t think he’s breathing. Looking around at all three of them, I know I was wrong—they do care about me. If only because of Jasper—at least they still care and I can’t hold back my tears.
“Hey, what’s going on?” Will asks.
“Why is Jasper still in jail?” I sob, because telling him what I was feeling moments ago seems wrong.
“Todd told us his bail hearing was rescheduled to Monday due to the lockdown.”
“Did you get to talk to Jasper? How is he?”
Sadness fills his eyes. “We were outside the courtroom when he was ushered out, but he wouldn’t even look at Drew or I.”
My sobs grow louder. He is in custody. Alone. Afraid. And I fear he might just shut everyone out.
“Are you in pain from the attack?” Will asks staring at the tears streaming down my cheeks.
The attack.
Yes.
The attack.
I need to tell them.
Swiping across my eyes with my right arm, I try to wipe away the tears. “The police think the man who attacked me is Jasper’s accomplice, don’t they?”
“I hate to say it, but I think so.”
Snapping my head toward the television, I watch as the clip from earlier is replayed. Then I look back at Will. “What has Todd told you? What are the police telling Todd?”
“Nothing. He doesn’t know anything. No one is talking, not to us, not to Todd, and Whitney is also being kept in the dark over at the mayor’s office as well.”
Whitney is Will’s . . . well girlfriend I think, but I’m not so sure. Anyway, she’s transitioning from working for her brother, Todd Carrington, to working for the mayor. Regardless of her position, she always seems to know everything, so her not knowing anything alerts me that there must be a reason for the wall that seems to have gone up.
I shift my gaze back to Will. “I know who attacked me and I think this information will help clear Jasper.”
His jaw drops. “You know who it was in your apartment? How? All Jake saw was a man in a ski mask.”
Jake rushes toward me. “How do you know who it was? I tried to catch him but was torn between leaving you on the floor and going after him.”
I know which he picked and I’ll forever be grateful.
Will is anxious. “Who was it? This could be what we need to get proof Jasper isn’t involved and get him out of jail.”
“It was Uncle Tom. Tom Worth,” I clarify.
Shock fills the air.
“Are you sure?” Drew asks, his hulking body coming closer.
“Yes. I’m certain it was Tom Worth.”
“What about Tom?” The soft feminine and familiar voice brings more tears to my eyes. Mrs. Storm is at the foot of my bed with an empty vase filled with water in her hand.
“Mrs. Storm,” I manage and know instantly all of these flowers are from her, from her garden.
“How are you feeling?” she asks.
“Not the best I’ve ever felt,” I say with honesty.
“Well, I’m glad to see you’re awake.” Her smile is forced and I know she must be heartbroken over her son. “Now, what were you saying about Tom?”
Knowing I shouldn’t say anything in front of her, because it will bring back memories of her husband and how he died in the Laneworth Plant explosion, renders me speechless.
“I hope he wasn’t here bothering you this morning. I ran into him yesterday at Hank’s office and he wanted to know where you lived.”
“What did you tell him?” Jake asks Mrs. Storm, sounding way too concerned for her to know something is not up.
Coming closer to me, she sets the vase down and kisses my forehead with an affection I never received from my own mother. “I assumed it had something to do with Allison,” she says softly, as if she knows my emotional triggers just as well as I know hers.
Allison.
Allison Lane.
Perhaps now Allison Worth.
My mother, the name I never utter.
Picking up the cut flowers I didn’t notice lying on the table near the vase, Mrs. Storm carefully lowers their stems into the water. “Nothing. Not only was I shocked to see him, but I also didn’t feel comfortable telling him anything. However, once the news about his daughter broke though, I honestly felt a little guilty about the way I treated him.”
“What time did you see him at HH Automotive?” Jake asks with curiosity, still more than obvious.
“I’m not sure, but sometime before three.” She looks toward Drew. “Drew and I met in the elevator as I was going up; he was going down. Hank and I had to meet with someone. That was the only reason I was there.”
Hank Harper.
Jasper’s mentor from his high school years turned his mother’s lover.
Everyone in this room is aware that she and Hank have been having an affair for years, but I’m sure trying to hide it is a habit she will never break.
Jake’s gaze snaps to Drew. “Was he in Hank’s office with you?”
“No, but come to think of it, Hank’s secretary did say he was in a meeting when I arrived; however, when he opened his door he was alone, so I assumed she meant a phone conference.”
My looming suspicion about Hank comes back two-fold, and I glance toward Jake, who I know is having the very same thoughts as me by the twisted look on his face.
Drew seems to take offense and furrows his brows. “I wouldn’t even know who Tom Worth was if he was standing in front of me, so don’t look at me like that. Besides, it means nothing.”
“Why all the talk about him anyway?” Mrs. Storm asks, having taken the discussion in stride up until now.
Before anyone can answer, there’s a rap on the door and all of us turn toward it. Two men in dark-blue uniforms are standing there. “Miss Lane, we’d like to question you about your attack last night.”
Drew squares his broad shoulders. “Are you sure you’re up to talking, Charlotte? You’ve been through a lot.”
Before I can answer, Will answers for me. “Let her talk to them, Drew. What she has to tell them might just help free Jasper.”
Might?
No, it has too!
This information will absolutely squash the theory that the man who attacked me was Jasper’s accomplice. After all, there is no way he’d be involved with the man who he half blames for his father’s death.
Tom Worth.
My father’s once partner in Laneworth Automotive.
The man who attacked me.
The man with one blue eye and one green.
CHAPTER THREE
DETOUR
Jasper
THIS TIME I know it.
I know it with a certainty that grips and twists my heart until it’s ripped from my chest. That chokes my throat with a panic like I’ve never felt before. That makes my skin burn with knowing dread.
This time, I’m not going to get out.
I’m not going to be able to cheat death.
It’s too hot.
It’s too bright.
There’s too much smoke.
Glimpses of the blue and orange flames as they roar up the walls and curl onto the ceiling are all I can see through the haze, but I can feel the fire. I can feel its putrid black smoke as it singes my nostrils. Feel the raging heat as it dances all around me with a hunger that won’t be satisfied until it consumes me. Feel my breathing getting more and more ragged as I pull in the toxic pollution of
carbon monoxide mixed with God knows what chemicals.
The flames are getting closer. Circling me. Making me their target. Their victim.
The alarm is blaring.
But the warning is useless, as there is no way out.
No windows.
No doors.
The fire owns me and soon it will consume me, reducing me to nothing more than ash. Ash with no body for people to bury. No closure to accept the truth. Nothing left of me but the memories of those who knew me and those, like everything else in life, fade with time.
Gut-wrenching with agony, there is no choice but to accept my fate.
And so I do.
I give in to it.
Fear.
Let it lick me raw. Suck me into its black hole. Take me. Own me. And spit me out. Yet, this time it’s not hatred I’m left with when I come out the other end, but rather a sense that I’m not him.
I’m not my father.
The banging of metal slamming against metal jolts me awake.
That fucking nightmare about what happened to my father twenty years ago is back. I haven’t had it in years. I learned how to beat it. Conquered it with my need for speed and still, it’s back to haunt me. Well, it’s not going to win. I’m older. I’m stronger. And I know. I know that it wasn’t my father’s fault that he died. And unlike when I was younger, now I finally believe it. He didn’t want to die in the fire at the Laneworth Automotive Plant. He didn’t want to leave his family with nothing. Leave the woman he loved to fumble through life on her own and try to raise a boy who feared death so much all he ever wanted to do was prove he could beat it.
He didn’t want to leave my mother and me alone.
Just like Charlie didn’t want to leave me either. Mr. Lane took her. He ran. He had his own demons to fight.
Everyone does.
Like a phoenix rising, I bolt up, rising out of the ashes, out of the flames, emerging as the strong, confident man I made myself into. The one who has to get the fuck out of this prison cell.
I look around in my dimly lit, flame-free cell. My eyes sting but not from smoke, yet rather lack of sleep. I wipe the sweat from my brow and try to orient myself.
The guard is standing over me. “Let’s go,” he commands.
I hop to my feet and the shackling begins.
Quiet in his task, when he’s done I’m heaved from the cell and pushed forward. This time the cuffs are even tighter and I can immediately feel the bleeding. Blood trails behind me as I walk toward the elevator of the only fully-operational police precinct in the bankrupt city of Detroit.
Small.
Dingy.
And way too familiar.
I turn toward him. “If all federal buildings are under lockdown, does that mean all city land auctions are canceled?”
Today is the day 8 Mile goes up for auction. I’m in here and have had no contact with anyone, so I can only hope Will, Drew, and Jake do what they have to do to get it bought.
The guard shrugs. “I’d assume so. All city businesses are closed. No one is allowed in or out of them without prior permission.”
That answers my question, and I keep walking.
Joined by another guard, my escort is in place and the doors are opened.
The scene outside on this Monday morning is even more chaotic than it was Saturday morning. Still in lockdown mode, no one except police officials are being allowed inside the building.
I can see why.
Protestors now surround us in hundreds. A myriad of small colorful tents have popped up in front of the building. Smoke tumbles from several small bonfires dispersed between them here and there. It’s not marshmallows these people are looking to roast though—it’s me.
A small portable wooden structure with ‘Justice Shack’ written on it blocks a portion of the road. ‘Fuck the police’ graffiti is scrawled on the precinct building.
Things appear to be out of hand.
The demonstrators are holding signs and chanting that they will not leave until justice is served. I try not to look at the hatred on the faces of those who just weeks ago called me their white knight. Looked toward me to save this town. Craved what I so willingly wanted to give them—hope.
My head held high, I move through the crowd. But the closer I get to the curb, the more I begin to realize their eyes aren’t on me. Signs with the word, ‘Coward’, on them are everywhere. All of a sudden I understand the protesting doesn’t have anything to do with me.
What’s going on?
The door to the parked police car opens and a man chained and cuffed in the same manner as me is tugged from the back seat. The crowd is hostile and the people seem to multiply. All eyes are on the older man as he is hauled toward the building I just evacuated.
Looking like he hasn’t slept, shaved, or showered, a very unkempt Detective Sergeant John Hill suddenly appears in my line of vision. I suppose the man who arrested me mere days ago has been too busy with his investigation into the murders of Tory Worth and Eve Hepburn, and trying to nail me for both, to worry about those small things.
Without a glance back, he shoves his way through the mob of angry people and stops in front of me. Arms out to his sides, he is giving his best effort to clear a path for me to pass through the ever-growing mass of rioting people.
Just as I’m about to cross paths with the other shackled man, there’s a popping noise whizzing through the air.
K-pow. K-pow. K-pow
I know that sound.
K-pow. K-pow. K-pow.
My body goes cold.
K-pow. K-pow. K-pow.
“Get down!” someone shouts to the crowd.
“Cover your head!” someone else screams at the top of his lungs.
What follows is an echo. My ears are ringing. I have no fucking idea what is going on except for the fact I know that is the sound of a high-powered rifle. Hysterical screams rise above the crowd and then I look over to see a blanket of red spreading across the faded blue jumpsuit of the other man in shackles.
Fuck!
Someone shot him.
Everything is hazy. There’s a thud. It’s his body. He dropped like a rock sinking to the bottom of the ocean. My heart is pounding. Fear rushes through me like I’ve never felt. Am I next?
Chaos everywhere.
Shoving.
Pushing.
Shouting.
“Get the fuck down.” The guard is in my face.
My surroundings are blurred and I teeter on the edge of the step until a sudden shift in movement, or more like a shove, has me falling and sinking to the ground. My head is level with the man who was just shot. He’s dead. There’s no doubt about it. But his eyes are open. Wide open. Nausea fills my gut. Unable to move, I can’t help but stare at his cold lifeless eyes—one blue and one green.
“Get him out of here,” I hear the detective yelling.
He’s talking about me.
The guards are huddled on top of me and swiftly stand, pulling me off of the ground with them. Before I know it, I’m sandwiched between them. One in front, one in back, and they are hustling me back up the remaining stairs.
I start to count the steps.
One.
I’m not going to make it out of this alive.
Two.
Shit. Shit. Shit. My life is over before I ever started it.
Three.
I’m sorry, Charlotte. Sorry about everything.
Four.
Wait. There are no more shots. What is the gunman waiting for?
Five.
The cuffs no longer bother me.
Six.
The world gradually speeds up again. I’m no longer moving in slow motion. There are no more stairs.
I’m inside.
Unharmed.
Safe.
Alive.
“What the fuck was that about?” one guard says to the other.
“I think the better question is who the fuck is splattered on the steps?”
They stare at each other in bewilderment.
“I know who it is,” I mumble.
Their heads snap in my direction. “Who?”
“Tom Worth.”
And as soon as those two words leave my mouth my concern for Charlotte has never been greater. Fuck my situation. Fuck what just happened. If Tom Worth is back in town, more than likely so is Charlotte’s mother, Allison Lane.
And how will Charlotte take that news?
Not well.
I need to find a way to reach out to her. Even if it’s possible, I know I shouldn’t.
Never in my life have I felt so conflicted.
CHAPTER FOUR
SPEED BUMP
Charlotte
THE PROBLEM WITH community self-defense lessons is that they’re relatively civilized.
You square off against your instructor and although you’re using your fists to punch him and your legs to kick him, you aren’t really giving it your all because the reality is you don’t want to hurt him.
When looking your attacker straight in the eye—that no longer holds true, and all the lessons you’ve taken seem to have been for not.
“I’ve heard Krav Maga is the leader in self-defense training.”
I look over at Mrs. Storm as she takes the flowers out of the vases by the handfuls and tosses them into the trashcan she’s holding while we wait for my discharge papers. I can finally go home. Yesterday, I suffered from headaches all day, so I was kept overnight with strict orders to leave the television off and sit in quiet.
It killed me.
Today, I get to leave. Mrs. Storm is here with me and we’ve been discussing how I feel after my attack. Helpless. Vulnerable. Angry. Fearful. Yet, thankful that I’m alive. “So have I. I think I might look around for where classes are held.”
At forty-nine, Mrs. Storm is a classic beauty. With light-brown hair curled in big waves, high cheekbones, and a slender figure, she is probably the most beautiful woman I know. Petals fall to the ground as she looks back at me with what I can only describe as Bette Davis eyes. “I wish I could tell you not to, but with all the craziness going on around us it wouldn’t be a bad idea to be able to protect yourself better.”
I give her a nod.
“You know, Jasper isn’t going to take the news of your attack well. He’s going to blame himself.”