The heavy tread of boots stopped just outside the door, and I panted through the agonizing pain that seemed to radiate from my head down into my toes, fighting to stay quiet.
“Celia?” A gruff voice called out, and I curled in on myself; squeezing the glass until the sides began to slice into my palm.
I needed the pain to stay awake.
The door handle shifted; first to the left, and then to the right, but the lock held. I breathed a sigh of relief just as there was a sound right outside the bathroom window.
“Oh, fuck.”
I gulped down a shaky breath before reluctantly bringing my head up. The first rays of sunshine had broken free from the horizon, obscuring the man’s face.
I closed my eyes against the blinding brightness and croaked, “No. Please.”
“I got you, sweetheart.”
You’re doin’ great, sweetheart. Absolutely fuckin’ perfect.
The carousel in my head spun faster as he began to climb through the window, making it appear as if there was more than one of him coming for me. I fought against the dizziness and dragged myself under the small vanity area with a soft whimper.
The man let out a rough curse as he squeezed through, before dropping into the tub with a grunt. I shrank back, ignoring the sharp stab of pain in my chest as I made myself as small as possible.
I tightened my grip on the piece of mirror, watching warily as the blurry figure moved away from me and toward the bathroom door.
A second man rushed in, only to stumble back into the wall with a startled cry. “Jesus Christ! Mary!”
“Celia,” the first man moved closer. “Do you know where you are?”
I was in hell.
I blinked and narrowed my good eye, straining to see my attackers. It wasn’t until the man knelt beside me, that I gasped in recognition. “Comedian?”
He gave a curt nod. “It’s me. Let’s get you checked over, yeah?”
His fingers trailed over my cheek, the contact sending a shiver through my body. I turned away and pulled the bloody towel up from between my thighs until it was under my chin; trying to maintain some sense of modesty.
“Angel, I’m gonna need your help.”
I glanced over his shoulder to see that Angel was slumped against the wall, fist pressed against his mouth, shaking.
She lost the baby…
Angel came, but it was too late.
“Get him out of here,” I whispered. “Please don’t let him see me like this.”
“I’m fine, doll.” Angel took a deep breath and stood tall. “Comedian, I need the first aid kit from my saddlebag and more towels. What else? Bleach, and um, fuck—just bring all the cleaning supplies.”
His jaw had settled into a hard line, and he ran a hand through his hair before quietly repeating to himself, “I’m fine.”
I reached up and gripped the edge of Comedian’s vest with a moan as my body contracted painfully. Sweat, or blood, ran from my hairline and I bit down on my lower lip to keep from screaming.
Comedian looked down, his mouth falling open in shock. “Fuck.” The skin bunched around his eyes as he backed away from me, the muscles jumping in his neck.
I saw the question in them but couldn’t answer as the bathroom disappeared into darkness again.
Movement brought me back to reality with a cry. Angel managed to stay on his feet as he pulled me out from under the vanity, but his skin still had a greenish hue to it. Comedian was nowhere to be found, and I briefly wondered if the sight of my blood had managed to shake the tough biker.
“How did you know to come?” I asked, my voice sounding like the rusted gate at the cemetery. It was fitting, really, as I was rapidly coming to the conclusion that I was dying.
He covered me with a clean towel and flipped on the faucet at the sink, letting the water heat up before running a washcloth under it. “Your old man called Wolverine, and he called in me and Comedian. We were closest.”
His jaw tightened, and he paused before adding, “I had no idea you were still in town. I just assumed that when the club pulled out, you went with ‘em. If I would’ve known—make no mistake, every last one of the motherfuckers’ll be meeting the Reaper.”
“My dad took the girls away, right? Did they seem—were they okay? Not like this?” My voice cracked as I gestured toward my face.
He knelt on the tile, seemingly oblivious to the fact that my blood was now soaking through his jeans. “Your girls are safe, darlin’. Let’s get you cleaned up.”
“It’s not fair to make you do this.”
“If I don’t, who will?” He gently dabbed at the blood on my chin with the damp cloth, but I jerked away.
So fuckin’ good.
“Don’t touch me,” I hissed suddenly, batting away his hand. I wanted to claw at my skin until I couldn’t feel their touch anymore.
Angel rocked back on his heels, shifting gears. “Where’s Hawk? He do this to you?”
I stared at the crescent-shaped markings on my thighs and traced the red indentions with the pad of my thumb, letting his words sink in.
Had he?
“I did this to myself.” I squeezed my eyes shut as more tears fell. Jamie had worked so hard to make the other clubs think he was dead, and I’d blown it.
Why hadn’t I just told him the money was missing?
I’d thought I was so bright; entering into games and making my own money. The truth had been staring me right in the face over the past three years, yet I’d never once suspected that Hawk was capable of stealing from us.
“Celia, did you hear me? Jamie’s on his way.”
I studied the wounds on my legs again. “He can’t come here.”
That was exactly what they wanted.
Angel brought his hand down to rest against the rug burn on my knee. “You’re shakin’. Look at me—it would take a damn army to stop Jamie from getting to you.”
And it would take an army to save me once he discovered the truth.
I mashed my lips together and shook my head again. “You can’t let him, Angel. He can’t—” My voice cut off in a sob and he tried to pull me into his arms.
With a whimper, I tugged the towel up again and fought to free myself from his grasp. I didn’t know why I was concerned with keeping myself covered. It didn’t matter. There wasn’t a part of my body that hadn’t been marked in some way.
We had some good times together, didn’t we?
I sat up and squeezed Angel’s arm to the point of leaving bruises, roaring, as another small gush of blood spread from between my thighs.
He grabbed the small trashcan by the toilet and held it under my face when I began retching.
It shouldn’t have been him.
“I’m sorry,” I moaned through the pain. “I’m so sorry.”
“Shh… don’t you apologize. You’re gonna be okay.” He rubbed small circles across my back.
I expected him to run away to join Comedian; but he stayed, situated at my back with his legs on either side of mine.
When my strength fled, I let my head fall back to his chest and confessed, “It’s my fault, Angel. They know he’s alive because of me. I led them here.”
There was a soft knock at the door, and then six Comedians walked into the bathroom.
It was like the start of a bad joke.
I began giggling, and Comedian eyed me warily. “I, uh, I got the shit.”
Something tore loose in my chest, and my laughter turned to tears again. I knew how crazy I must’ve looked when Comedian kept his eyes trained toward the ceiling; seemingly doing everything in his power to avoid looking at me.
Angel shifted me in his arms and reached for the kit while Comedian hung back with the towels, looking like he wanted to be anywhere but where he was.
“Let’s get you in the bathtub—” Angel began.
“No.” I just wanted to be left alone to die in peace.
My girls were safe. Angel would tell Jamie that the clubs knew he was ali
ve so he could prepare. The rest was out of my hands.
“Okay,” he nodded. “Comedian, look in the closet and see if you can find a robe or something for her to put on.”
“No,” I moaned. “Leave me alone.”
Angel shifted me over before standing up. The two bikers had a silent conversation with their eyes before Comedian disappeared again.
I lay back and let my neck rest against the side of the tub, the coolness of the cast-iron welcome against my sweltering skin. My body relaxed, and unconsciousness pulled me away again. I’d had fever dreams as a kid, but they were nothing like this.
It was some cross between a nightmare and a hallucination; vivid and terrifying. It was only when I fought for consciousness that I realized it wasn’t real.
“You’re safe, Celia,” Angel said softly when I jerked awake with a muffled cry. “Can you give me a name?”
“I told you; I did this to myself.”
Comedian hovered nearby with a bottle of water but waited to approach me until Angel nodded to him. “I got you some water.”
“Comedian,” I croaked. “You can’t tell Jamie. Neither of you. He can’t know that this happened.”
He knelt beside me and held the water bottle to my lips. I obediently took a small sip before begging, “But, Jamie—”
“Drink, Celia,” Comedian commanded. “You need the fluids.”
I drank half of it before pulling away to try again. “Comedian, you can’t let him know—”
“It’s, uh, it’s Michael. Like the archangel. Do you remember what he does?” His voice was soft and steady as if he was speaking to a small child. “He’s a protector and a warrior. Me and Grey? We’re gonna handle this shit, so don’t you be scared.”
A tear fell, and then another. I couldn’t stop them if I tried. My body twisted and tightened as the war raged within. Angel passed the trashcan over to Michael, but through sheer will, I managed to keep the water down.
“I’m not scared,” I whispered. “It’s because of Mary.”
Angel froze at the sink with a washcloth in his hands before slowly turning to face me.
“What happened to his mother nearly killed him, Angel. You and I both know that.” A shudder passed through my body, and my teeth began to chatter. “If he knew about this—”
I let my words trail off, but both men knew what I was asking of them. If Jamie knew what we’d lost because of my actions, it would destroy him.
“Fuckin’ Christ,” Michael whispered. “He’s already on the road; he’s gonna see this.”
“We’ll clean it up and say they beat me, but nothing more.”
Angel shook his head. “Celia…”
“I’ll give you the names, but only if you agree. Swear he’ll never know what happened.”
Michael pushed the water bottle to my lips again. “Drink the rest of this, and I’ll do it. Angel?”
I greedily gulped the remainder down, ignoring the sting from the cuts inside my mouth, while Angel watched me warily from across the bathroom.
“This is what you want?” He finally asked.
I nodded, even as the pain came over me in waves; battering me just as I seemed to be coming up for air.
“We’ll do it, but there’s gonna be a day where you have to tell him the truth. Strong or not—he deserves to know.”
It was better if no one knew.
This would be the sin that I carried to my grave; along with the things they’d done to my body. The shameful secrets that I buried deep.
“Give us the names, Celia,” Michael urged.
I took a deep breath. “Hawk was working against the club with a man called Cobra. He said he was a Serpent. The third man…” I fought through the haze that had settled over me to remember Lip Ring’s name. “Cobra called him Manny; said he was Los Dicta—the gangbangers that hurt Molly.”
Michael’s eyes widened. “It ain’t possible. We killed all of ‘em—”
I recalled Cobra’s words; my tongue heavy in my mouth. “You can drive out a nest of snakes, but if you don’t kill every last one of them, they come right back. Only this time,” I panted. “They’re mad as hell.”
The body that had been wrecked at the hands of men who hated my husband turned on me; twisting and tightening until every fiber of my being ached.
I groaned and tried lifting my hand to grip Michael’s vest, only to realize I couldn’t move it. I stared down at my other arm, but only managed to twitch my index finger.
“H-h-help m-me,” I slurred.
Michael’s mouth moved into a flat line. “Gave you a little something to help you sleep. Me and Angel’ll get this place cleaned up. You need to rest now.”
I tried to shake my head, but nothing in my body was under my control anymore. More blood pulsed from between my legs, but the pain was gone.
The carousel in my head slowed, and I was whisked away to a place where I felt like I was floating. I’d just decided that I would stay forever when I looked up and saw Cobra standing just outside the bathroom doorway.
“I had to get another taste, sweetheart.” He unbuttoned his jacket with a grin and stalked toward me. As he did, his head morphed into that of an actual cobra. I was momentarily distracted from the change because, despite the beating he’d doled out, his suit was still in pristine condition.
Not even one wrinkle.
Angel turned to him with a nod and went back to sweeping up the glass. The halo over his head tilted as he bent over, and he straightened it with a growl. “Try not to make such a mess this time, yeah?”
Cobra flipped him off, never taking his eyes off of mine. “I’ll do whatever the fuck I want. If you’re lucky, I’ll consider letting you watch. What do you think, Celia? You want Angel to watch as I fuck you deep?”
I began screaming, reopening every wound until my mouth and throat filled with blood. It flowed from my nose and mouth, cutting my scream off into a gurgle.
Michael massaged my shoulder before ripping the towel down. “You be as loud as you fuckin’ want, Celia. Ain’t no one around to interrupt us.”
He began fumbling with the zipper on his jeans while I lay helplessly against the side of the bathtub. Angel swept another pile of glass into the trashcan and straightened his halo before meeting my gaze.
“Sorry, Celia. Grey should’ve paid us more. You were a debt… that’s all you’ve ever been. That’s all you’ll ever be. You want us to keep your secrets, you have to pay the price.”
“Open up, doll,” Michael gripped my chin in his hand, squeezing until the bones began to give. Only he wasn’t Michael anymore—this was Comedian. He looked exactly the same, but I knew the difference.
This was the monster that hurt Mikey.
“No, no,” Cobra snapped through his fangs. “That’s not how we play this game, is it? I go first while you watch.”
“Fuck that,” Comedian growled. “Her old man kept a secret from me, didn’t he, Celia?”
I shook my head. “I’m s-sorry—”
My words cut off as he shoved himself into my mouth, gagging me. I struggled to take a breath, but Comedian showed no sign of letting up, even as I began to vomit. His fists tightened in my hair, tethering me to him.
“Oh, sweetheart, you’re just as good as I remember,” Cobra taunted at my back as he ripped me wide open again. He was going to strike, over and over, filling my body with his venom.
Tears poured from the corners of my eyes, and the room began to grow dim, but still, I fought. I knew it was futile as I battled the waves surrounding me, trying to push myself above the water long enough to take a breath.
The numbness set in as the toxins took over and my body relaxed, dragging me down into the depths of oblivion. I’d always expected death to hurt, but it came as a welcome embrace.
Chapter Two
Grey: 2000
I jumped out of the truck we’d taken from one of the New Mexico bikers, the dormant grass crunching under the heels of my boots as I raced across t
he front lawn. The drive down the mountain had been a white-knuckle experience, with Slim taking the icy switchbacks at full speed while I pleaded with him to go faster.
“Grey,” Bear called after me. “Wait a minute. We don’t know what we’re walking into here.”
Didn’t we?
I turned around. “One of us does.”
Slim had been the one to take the call from Comedian just outside of New Mexico but had refused to tell me anything about Celia’s condition, other than that she was alive. His face had gone as white as a sheet, and it hadn’t escaped my attention that he kept his foot mashed against the accelerator, even when the governor kicked in.
The driver’s side door opened, and the man in question slowly climbed out to face me. “Jamie—”
“I’m goin’ in there, Slim. Ain’t one of you gonna stop me.”
The alcohol had worn off hours ago, leaving me with panicked thoughts and a shitload of adrenaline. I would’ve torn the house down brick by brick to get to her and not even broken a sweat.
He nodded. “No one’s tryin’ to stop you, but you need to know what we’re up against. Hawk rolled over, and now every club around knows you ain’t with the Reaper. He wasn’t working alone either.”
The implication of his words hit me dead in the eyes. I’d had every piece of my exit strategy in place… save one.
Her.
I’d listened to the wrong people and left my family alone with someone who’d betrayed them; convinced myself they were safer here than they were with me. Celia herself had begged me not to go, and as usual, I did what I wanted.
My boots hit the front porch, and I took a deep breath; suddenly reliving every fucking second of my nightmare. I knew what lay on the other side of the door.
It was always the same.
Only this time, I wouldn’t wake up in my wife’s arms.
Richard jumped up from the recliner when I threw open the front door before falling onto the coffee table with a yelp. “G-Grey? You’re dead. You died. We were at your funeral.”
Protector: Silent Phoenix MC Series: Book Four Page 3