Kate’s mouth hung open, and I knew I’d pushed my luck. Instead of alleviating her worries, I’d managed to make things worse.
“Mama, why did you come here?” Dakota’s voice wobbled as she slumped back against the couch cushions.
“I came here to help you. I know what you’re facing in charges, and we have the means to make it go away.” I reached for her hand only for her to jerk it from my grasp.
“Why is this ‘club’ so willing to help me? They don’t know anything about me.”
My mouth flooded with saliva. “Because you’re important to me.”
Because you’re important to your father.
Dakota stood up and walked over to the door. “Well, it’s been lovely, but I’m gonna have to ask you to leave now. Like right now, now.”
“Don’t push me away, Dakota. Let me help you,” I begged.
“I’ve managed just fine on my own for the last decade, I can handle it. Plus, I’d rather use a more legal means to deal with my problems. Go.” She pointed toward the door.
I pushed down my grief, knowing I needed to warn her about the badge that she’d been spending time with. Somebody within the department was working with our enemies, I was sure of it.
With traitors around every corner, leaving them ignorant was no longer an option. “Kota-Bear, a word of advice? If you want this to be over quickly, quit talking to cops. It’s only making it worse.”
As I climbed into my car, it struck me how much damage had been done. I’d never understood my mother’s obsession with taking my children; never imagined the lengths she’d go to get them.
Now, my daughters regarded me with little more than contempt, and I realized what she’d wanted all along—me, left completely alone in this world as punishment for choosing Jamie.
Never mind that she’d stolen the money, my daughters were now solely focused on what my affiliation to Silent Phoenix would mean for them.
The time I’d lost with them was gone forever, and just like that, the tiny flame of hope in my chest flickered out.
* * *
“Celia, you believe this shit? They sent the badges in to tear up Cap’s superhero magazines. Man, fuck that. I say we pump ‘em all full of lead—”
There was so much to unpack that it was hard to even know where to start. In the six years Rick had been with us, I’d found it was better to intervene quickly when he went off on one of his tangents. Otherwise, things got completely out of hand. “You want to go after the cops… and shoot them. I can’t see how that could backfire.”
“It only backfires if the gun’s pointed the wrong way… kinda like that time you shot me.” He grinned and waved his fingers in the air like he was Yosemite Sam.
“Rick,” I said slowly. “I didn’t shoot you… I stabbed you. There’s a difference, you know.”
He dropped onto the porch swing beside me with a laugh. “It’s Little Ricky, Celia. We been over this. And yeah, see, I tell people you shot me because it seems more badass. But we got bigger fish to throw in the bush right now. Cap is in serious shit.”
I sighed. “Quit calling her Cap. Her name is Dakota, and what I’m still stuck trying to figure out is how she ended up at that house, in the middle of a drug bust, while you were supposed to be watching her. Jeremy watches Kate, and she stays safe—”
“Yeah, she stays safe with Jarvis, alright.” He waggled his eyebrows up and down before lighting up a joint.
“What does that mean?”
He inhaled and shook his head. “Nada, and just so you know, I didn’t even come up with that nickname. That was the cop. I think Cap is short for Caparina, which is like a butterfly or some shit—”
“Rick,” I interjected, knowing full well that the nickname had everything to do with Dakota’s penchant for Captain America t-shirts and nothing even remotely related to winged insects.
“I mean, what girl wants to be compared to an insect? Nah, if Dakota was my lady, I’d call her mi cielo, because why she give two shits about bein’ a bug when she could be the entire sky?”
Angel, who’d been sitting quietly in the shadows, stood up and slowly walked over to lean against the railing in front of the swing. “Goblin,” he said, using the road name that Rick hated so much. “She ain’t ever gonna be your lady, but I ain’t opposed to takin’ out some badges for what they did to her comics.”
The headache I’d been fighting most of the day intensified, leaving me restless and ready to snap. I’d tried doing the math in my head but had given up once the figures reached a hundred thousand. She’d kept the money for herself, and had Dakota not been arrested, I never would’ve known they were struggling.
Some kind of mother I was.
“Celia?” Angel waved a hand in front of my face.
I forced myself back to the present. “I’m sorry?”
“Asked how you knew she’d been arrested.”
“Oh, Kate called… like a last resort type of thing.” I clenched my hands into fists as my tears threatened to spill over again.
The sound of a bike cut through the dark and Rick jumped up. “Angel? Wasn’t there that thing in the kitchen you wanted to show me?”
“Yep. It’s a neat little gadget for bread.” He hurriedly followed him toward the door.
“That’s called a toaster,” I snapped as the screen door slammed shut behind them.
As if sensing the storm that was brewing, the cicadas fell silent. I was off the porch and waiting on the front lawn by the time he pulled up. The full moon acted as a spotlight, illuminating everything around us.
“Hey, darlin’.”
I stabbed a finger into his chest. “Don’t you ‘hey, darlin’’ me, Jamie Quinn. Do you know how our daughter ended up in that house? Jeremy and I looked into it. Two words—Jackson Blake. Her ex-fiancé. Care to explain to me why a family that’s partnered with your club set our daughter up?”
He ran his tongue over his teeth with a grin. “Jesus, you’re cute when you’re pissed.”
“Jamie,” I warned.
“Fuck, Celia. Yeah, the Blake family has been tryin’ to change the terms of our partnership for quite some time but thought they knew better than to involve my kids. I’ve got Mikey lookin’ into this and if—why you cryin’?”
I sucked in a ragged breath and angrily swiped at the tears before fanning my face with trembling hands. “I’m fine, it’s just—” A sob tore from my throat, releasing a river down my cheeks.
Jamie’s eyes widened, and he cupped my chin in his hands, brushing my tears away with his thumbs. “What’s goin’ on, princess?”
“I—I can’t do this anymore! I can’t sit back and watch as everything falls apart around us. We swore to keep them safe, and we’re failing!” My lungs heaved, and I pulled myself from his arms before stalking toward the orchard.
“Celia.” He caught my elbow and spun me around to face him. “Tell me what happened.”
He was going to kill them.
“My parents took the money. All of it. Girls never saw a dime. Don’t you see?” My voice raised. “Everything we did was for nothing! She took my babies from me and made them struggle while she lived like royalty!”
The muscles in his jaw popped out as he ground his teeth together. “She did what? Thought those girls were as stubborn as their mama, refusin’ to spend the money on themselves…”
He calmly walked over and drove his fist into one of the trees with a roar. “Goddammit! I don’t care if she has an entire army camped out in her front yard, I’m sendin’ her to the Reaper, Celia! Don’t you try to change my mind!”
I shook my head as I sank down to my knees in the soft dirt. As much as I wanted to dredge up an emotion, I couldn’t. It seemed that after ten years, I finally cared for my parents as much as they had for me.
“When does it end, Jamie? The Sons of Death MC is growing stronger every day. We’ve been chasing Cobra for sixteen years, somebody named Saint for six, and now we have to worry about the people w
ho see our girls as collateral?”
As if another rival MC wasn’t bad enough, it was also becoming apparent that someone in his own clubhouse was working against him.
I didn’t even know what we were fighting for anymore.
For years, I’d held myself together with the idea that someday, Jamie and I would have a relationship with our daughters, but we were never going to be a family.
At least, not in the way I’d imagined.
Because my girls would never know this life.
“I’ve got every chapter workin’ together—” His eyebrows pulled together as he looked at the tree and then back down at me. “Oh my god.”
“What?”
Jamie ran a hand over his face. “Hawk told you Death was comin’ for you, right? The entire fuckin’ time I thought he meant the Reaper, but what if he was talkin’ about the Sons?”
A ball of lead settled in my belly, and I was glad that I was already sitting as I was suddenly lightheaded. “That doesn’t make any sense. Why would they want me?”
“Maybe we ain’t heard from the Serpents because they’ve been working with the Sons. Fuck, I don’t know, but I ain’t takin’ any chances. From now on, you don’t go anywhere without Carnage. I’ve got Jarvis and Goblin on the girls.”
Instead of calming me, Jamie’s words only made my tears fall faster. He didn’t know, but I’d been reading up on the Sons of Death. They were never mentioned by name, but there were countless news stories detailing their crimes. They’d started out taking down crime families but had more recently shifted their focus onto other MCs.
It didn’t matter how much security was in place, in the last year the Sons had executed the Outlaws Pres as he sat at a red light in broad daylight, along with the head of the Russo crime family while he ate dinner with his kids.
Jus in bello had never applied to the one-percenters, but there had always been an unspoken agreement that families were off-limits.
Until me.
I’d come a long way in sixteen years, but the idea that we’d forever be running from something pierced my armor, leaving me vulnerable.
I pushed past the tunnel vision and planted my hands into the dirt before getting my feet back under me.
“Celia?” Jamie called after me as I turned back toward the house. The pounding in my ears made it sound as if he was miles away.
I squeezed the pads of my fingers into my palms until the knuckles cracked, but still my skin vibrated with a need to hurt someone.
“Celia! Fuckin’ talk to me!”
My throat was dry, and my body had begun to tremble, but I refused to give up what little power I had left. I refused to sit and do nothing.
Jamie caught my wrist and dragged me backward, the muscles in his neck straining as he fought me for control. His rough breathing was the only sound between us, and I swallowed hard, letting him pull me deeper into the orchard.
I wanted to rake my nails down the sides of his face for letting our enemies stack up against us.
I wanted him to yank up the skirt of my dress and bury himself inside of me until none of it mattered.
“I don’t want to be afraid,” I whispered the words, as if doing so might make them less real.
Jamie inhaled deeply, and I studied his face, searching his blue eyes for signs of disappointment. “You’re scared?”
I nodded, biting down on my lower lip and he shifted his weight, guiding my body back up against a tree. I rested my forehead against his chest and breathed in the comforting scents of leather and cigarette smoke.
His chin rested on top of my head. “I love you, Celia. Ain’t one motherfucker gonna lay a hand on you or my kids… not as long as I’m still kickin’.”
Something strange happened at that moment. I exhaled a shaky breath as the tension left my shoulders because, for the first time in a long time, I believed him.
I freely handed over my trust, knowing that he’d keep his word, or die trying.
He released my wrist and brought his arms around my body, and I tilted my head back to look up at him. “I love you—” His head moved down, and my lips parted instinctively, knowing exactly what it was he wanted.
His mouth collided roughly with mine while the hands that had been around my waist moved down to the back of my thighs, gripping the hem of my dress and dragging it up over my hips. He paused, letting his fingers trail over the completed phoenix tattooed on my hip, reminding me of who I was.
I pulled away when he paused and found him watching me with heavy-lidded eyes. Clenching my thighs together, I scraped my nails across his beard while tracing his lips with the pad of my thumb, sending a shudder throughout his body. “What do you need, Jamie?” I asked, even though I already knew.
“Need to fuck you. Hard,” he growled around my hand, forcing my nipples into hardened points that ached to be touched.
My core clenched and I wondered if he knew how wet I already was for him.
He reached up and tucked a strand of hair behind my ear with a slow grin. “You gonna give me an answer, princess?”
“Did you ask me something?”
His eyes darkened with lust, even as he lowered his hands. “I wanna feel you clench around my cock. Wanna watch your tits bounce with every motherfuckin’ thrust before I suck them one at a time in between my teeth, bitin’ down until you moan. But you know I ain’t touchin’ you until you say it.”
My mouth fell open, not in shock, because what he was asking was nothing new. It was pure desire; a fervor that coursed through my veins every time he asked for my consent.
As if he knew that even after all these years, I needed it.
“I’m in control.”
He blew out a long breath. “That’s right.”
His fingers moved quickly over the buttons on my dress, pushing it from my shoulders as my nails raked along his scalp. I tightened my hold on his long hair, fighting to keep myself from dissolving into a puddle at his feet.
Our breaths turned ragged as we shed the clothing in our way, finding that there was no need for words after almost three decades. We easily navigated the slope of the other’s skin without taking any of it for granted.
Jamie jerked the cups of my bra down until my breasts spilled over into his hands before grinning up at me wickedly. The edge of his thumbnail lightly scraped across the sensitive flesh, and my hips rolled forward, seeking release.
Keeping his eyes firmly fixed on my face, he pulled one of my nipples into his mouth while dragging a finger down past my belly, teasing me over the lace of my panties. I arched my back as he ignited multiple points of pleasure, no longer sure what it was I was offering up to him.
“Please,” I whispered.
Jamie groaned, and his tongue darted out to lick around both nipples once more before he rocked back onto his heels. “What do you need, princess?”
“I need you to touch me.”
Jerking my panties to the side, he ran his middle finger over my folds before pushing it up inside of my body with a low growl. “So fuckin’ wet for me.”
I was painfully aroused, and any chances I had of coming down from my high disappeared when he pulled his finger out and popped it into his mouth, tasting me.
His shaft jutted up against his abdomen, and I reached between us, covering it with my palm. I used slow, deliberate strokes, knowing it would push him to the edge. He gripped my wrist again, breaking the contact between us before lifting me up in his arms and impaling me on his shaft.
The tree bark scraped against my back, but there was no time for soft and sweet. We were in the middle of a war, with enemies on all sides.
We succumbed to our base instincts, knowing that every second we had could’ve been our last. Our bodies came together in a frantic rhythm that the saints themselves couldn’t have stopped.
His body conveyed the things he couldn’t say, driving out my rage and fear; silently reminding me that we’d face the threats together. There was nothing gentle about the way he mov
ed inside of me, but with every thrust, I knew I was safe.
I was home.
The pressure built until I was convulsing around him in pulsing waves, my body holding him in a death grip. He didn’t slow down but began moving faster and faster until the world around us spun out of focus.
In that moment, we were invincible.
Life may have dealt us blow after blow, but we’d gotten up and kept fighting. On our own we’d survived; but together, we were unbeatable.
“Fuck,” he ground out as his thrusts became erratic and shallow. Sensing he was close, I used his shoulders to lift my body up, and he spilled his seed between us with a labored groan.
His arms tightened under my thighs as his forehead dropped to rest against mine. “Fuck, how does it get better every time?”
I’d just opened my mouth to reply when a twig snapped, and we both jerked our heads toward the sound.
Rick stepped out into the clearing with raised palms. “It’s just me. It looks weird, right? Okay, I’m just gonna cut to the chase. I came out here because I can’t find any more cereal.”
“You’re telling me that you just came out here for food?” I asked with a laugh when I realized that while Jamie had covered my body with his, his jeans were somewhere around his ankles, leaving his ass on full display for our intruder.
“Yeah.” He nodded thoughtfully before adding, “But, I stayed for the fucking. Never thought I’d wanna see two old people boning, but that was hot as fuck.”
“Goblin,” Jamie growled. “Get the fuck out of here before I beat your ass into the ground.”
“You got it, Pres. I’mma just be in the kitchen with Angel, waiting for the cereal. Take your time though… no rush. I found a frozen pizza in the back of the freezer, and it’s heatin’ up right now. You know, boss, you earned your colored wings… for your kutte. I’ll totally vouch for you if anyone gives you shit—tell them loud and proud that you fucked your Ol’ Lady good… right out in the open—”
Protector: Silent Phoenix MC Series: Book Four Page 27