by Kat Addams
Copyright © 2020 by Kat Addams
All rights reserved.
Visit my website at www.kataddams.com
Cover Designer: Lori Jackson, Lori Jackson Design, lorijacksondesign.com
Editor and Interior Designer: Jovana Shirley, Unforeseen Editing, www.unforeseenediting.com
No part of this book may be reproduced or transmitted in any form or by any means, electronic or mechanical, including photocopying, recording, or by any information storage and retrieval system without the written permission of the author, except for the use of brief quotations in a book review.
This book is a work of fiction. Names, characters, places, and incidents either are products of the author’s imagination or are used fictitiously. Any resemblance to actual persons, living or dead, events, or locales is entirely coincidental.
ISBN-13: 978-1-7331523-6-5
Contents
One
Two
Three
Four
Five
Six
Seven
Eight
Nine
Ten
Eleven
Twelve
Thirteen
Epilogue
Playlist
Acknowledgments
About the Author
OTHER BOOKS BY KAT ADDAMS
“Physical strength in a woman—that’s what I am.”
—Tina Turner
One
Betty
“This used to be my safe nest, and now, look at it.” Rox shook her head. Her hands curled around an iron bar as she popped it into place.
“Yeah, it’s still a safe nest. If you know the safe word.” I held the other end of the bar and fumbled with the directions in my hand.
We had been putting my sex swing together for three hours, and we still couldn’t get it right.
“Did you order this thing used or something? Is it missing parts? Can’t we just call Jay?” She groaned, raking her fingers through a pile of screws and bolts.
“Damn it, Rox. We don’t need a man. We’re going to set up my playroom like the badass bitches we are. DTF. Dirty. Tough. Female. Has Jay got you forgetting who you are? We can do this. Now, hand me that long metal thing beside you.”
“That’s an Allen wrench, Miss Independent.” Rox tossed the tool next to me and smiled. “He does have me goo-goo-eyed still, doesn’t he?” She let out a long-drawn-out sigh.
“Keep that mess to yourself. You see, y’all have something special. But me? If I were to find a man like that, no good would come of it, I’m telling ya. All the women in my family have been divorced. Some more than once. You know that. It just doesn’t work out for us Willis women like that. If I fell in love with a man like your Aussie next door, he would have a secret family still over there in the Down Under. I’d only find out about her and his babies after he died.” I stuck the Allen wrench in a hole, as per the instructions, and began to tighten the legs on my new toy.
“Bullshit. You know your conniving ass would find out way before he died. That’s why you got this room, isn’t it? You tie these poor men up and make them tell you everything, so you can protect yourself when you move forward with them.”
I set the wrench down and blinked. “Huh. I never thought about that. I always just thought I liked to dominate their asses. But that was some deep stuff you said. I take it, you’re still in therapy.”
“You know it.”
“Proud of you. Even if you’re peeling the layers of me back and exposing some shit I don’t want to think about. So, cut it out. Let’s just pretend that whip over there is for pleasure and not protection.” I tilted my chin in the direction of a rack that held not one, or two, or three leather whips, but eight.
I had a whip of every size for a man of every size.
Tall and lanky?
Check!
Short and muscular?
Check!
Dad bod incoming?
Check!
I wasn’t picky, but lately, I’d been leaning toward the stereotypical ripped-up men. Blame it on all of the male strippers I’d been eyeing at The Steamy Clam. Thanks to our ever-so-popular stripper friend Nikki, better known as Crystal Cream Pie, my taste in men had changed slightly. I never knew what a pair of pecs could do for me until I saw Terrance shake it onstage. Even after Nikki quit dancing, the girls and I would still stop by the club and have a good time.
“Let me get this straight. What you’re saying is, we’re putting up this sex swing, so you can finally invite Terrance over and torture him until he tells you all his secrets. Then, you can let yourself fall in love with him.” Rox rose to her feet and snapped another iron bar into place.
A chill ran up my spine. Ever since Rox and Nikki had been messing with all those crystals and otherworldly stuff, I swore, sometimes, I thought they could read my mind, just like right now. I’d been thinking of Terrance, and Rox had sensed it.
“Can you get out of my head, please? Why don’t you open up shop as a fortune-teller? You and Nikki. Take Layla too. I’ll run The Pink Taco Truck, and y’all three can use your crystals and voodoo to fight crime or some shit. Get people laid. Go out into the world and do what you got to do to make it a better place.” I pushed myself off the floor and reached for the other side of the swing, picking it up and joining it with the other half.
“I’m just saying, you’ve been eyeballing him for months. Y’all always flirt at Scarlett Herb when he’s making your drinks. And then, when he dances, you’re his number one fan. So, why haven’t either of you asked the other out yet? Or at least fucked. One-night stand? Hello? What’s wrong with you? The man is hot!” She pushed down hard on the roped seat of the swing, checking its sturdiness.
“You heard what Jay told us when we first started hanging around his bar. He said that Terrance has women in and out of there all the time. Some old ones, some young ones. He’s into a little bit of everything. So, to me, it sounds like Terrance—aka stripper Tito—is a playboy. Why else would he be stripping? I’m sure he makes enough off all the tips he’s pulling in. I know Jay pays his workers living wages. I’m not getting involved with Terrance or Tito or anyone who’s going to put me on a list. One-night stand? Maybe. But I don’t need all that right now. I’m working, paying bills, slaying goals.” I sat my ass down in the swing and pushed through my heels, sending my body flying backward and my legs up to the ceiling.
“Good Lord. Is that what you’re going to do in that thing? I might need to borrow it. Who’s going to be the first to test it out anyway? If you say you aren’t getting involved with a man, then what’s all this for?” She motioned around my sex dungeon.
“I didn’t say I don’t have sex. I have friends with benefits. You know, the usual gang. I don’t know yet who’s going to get into this thing. Mike, Larry, Kenneth—”
“Tito.”
“Girl, please. No time for a playboy.”
“I see. So, only you’re allowed to be the playboy in the relationship.” She rubbed her chin. “You should still ask him out. Maybe he isn’t a playboy. Or maybe he is, but he might change if he met the right person.”
“Now, I know your ass needs to go back to therapy. You can’t change a person!” I skidded to a stop.
“I’m not saying you can! I know you can’t, believe me. You know I know that. But I’m saying if he saw something he wanted—like your tall, fine Black ass dressed in leather and holding a whip—then maybe, just maybe, he would cut all that riffraff out and be yours. I mean, most people stop looking once they meet the right one. It’s not you changing anyone. It’s just them not caring about anyone else once they see perfe
ction.” She walked over to the bed and let herself fall back on my new, bouncy mattress.
I detangled myself from the straps of my swing and followed her to the bed, plopping myself on my back beside her.
“I’m not anything close to perfection. No one is.” I rubbed my palms over my tired eyes.
“No, we aren’t perfect. But … you’re wrong in saying you’re not close. You’re close to perfection for the right person.”
“There you go with that la-la love-land shit you’re in.”
She propped herself up on her elbow, staring down into my face. “What is it you want then? You’re thirty-one. Don’t you want kids and a family? I know you do, Betty. Don’t play tough with me.”
“I have my nieces for family. What I want is, not to lose focus on my work and fall into poverty. I grew up that way, you know. Have you ever felt hunger, Rox? Do you know how many days I’d sometimes go without a meal? Ever gone to school for days on an empty stomach? I’d sneak to the back of the line, so I could pick food off trays when everyone set them on the counter to be thrown out. What if something happened and I couldn’t provide for my children?”
“What in the hell are you talking about? You work with me. We own two taco trucks. We’re both financially stable and independent. I know you are if I am. I know how much you make. We’re a team. You just moved into my old house! Are you on crack? You’ve got it all. If you ever say you’re going to wait until you’re ready, you’ll never get what you want. And I know you. Play tough all you want, but I know you. There’s a heart somewhere in that cold, dead soul of yours. I know it because I hide mine too. That’s why we’re best friends.”
“I thought we were best friends because we knew too much about each other.” I rose on my elbow to meet her gaze.
“That too.” She laughed.
“I do have it all.” I glanced around my room.
Just a few short months ago, I had lived in an apartment that was crumbling before my eyes. Literally. When I banged my ex-boyfriend in there, anytime my headboard hit against the wall, dust would fall in our eyes from the old, retro ceiling. To make matters worse, it was one of those glittery ceilings. When we finished screwing, we’d both look like we’d stepped out of a dirty disco.
“Just not a man.”
“Yep. And who says we need a man? Look at that. We just put that together all by ourselves.” I nodded toward the swing, which made a squeaking noise, shifted, and collapsed on the ground.
“I rest my case,” Rox muttered, hurling herself off the bed and walking toward her phone that she had placed on the dresser. “I’m calling Jay, and he’ll bring some power tools. Then, we’re finishing your sex dungeon within the next hour or two. While he’s here, grill him about Terrance. Or I will. I see the way he looks at you and the way you look at him. Wouldn’t hurt to try it out. Besides, what do you have to lose? You said it yourself. You have it all.”
I bit my tongue. I couldn’t argue with her on that. For once, I was happy and settled in life. If I added a man into the mix, that could all change. Given my family’s track record on relationships, my entire life could be turned upside down by one douche bag. I rolled my eyes into the back of my head and lay down again.
“Fine. Call Jay. Let’s get this damn thing together. But I’ll be the one asking the Terrance questions.”
“Good. And anything you don’t find out, you can bring him over here and whip it out of him. Make that playboy pay for his naughty behavior! Show him who’s boss!” She thrust her hips in the air and made a spanking motion with her palm before turning her attention to her phone.
I closed my eyes, drowning out the sounds of her conversation with her boyfriend, and focused on the next steps in my life. I’d not given any thought to it before. I’d learned from my childhood to live one day at a time. The only planning for the future I’d ever done was financial. But now, I was secure, and now, I had no idea what came next. I didn’t need anything to come next, but I wasn’t getting any younger. The thought of kids and family terrified me, but that tiny heart Rox had mentioned did ache for that so-called American dream one day. That day just wasn’t going to be today or tomorrow or the next few years. I’d been saving every cent, and both kids and men could wipe out my cash quicker than I’d saved it—which had taken me years.
Nope, I’m not ready yet, I thought to myself. I’ve got too much work to do, too much planning, saving for …
I had no idea what I was saving for.
My future kids’ college funds one day? Big house on ten acres? A vacation home in Greece?
“He’ll be right over,” Rox said, interrupting my thoughts.
It was a welcome interruption. These deep thoughts needed to go.
“You got one of the good ones, you know. You’re lucky.” I smiled, genuinely proud of my friend. I hadn’t seen her this happy ever.
When Jay had walked into her life, Rox shone brighter than any of the DTF crew could imagine. I didn’t want to get all crazy like Nikki and believe the hocus-pocus, but Jay and Rox were proof enough of how someone could walk into your life and change the course of your path forever.
“Thanks. I know. It’s an amazing feeling. We’re going to get your dark soul to feel it. You think you’re doing good and have it all now? Wait until you meet the one.” She sighed, letting herself free fall again onto my bed.
“Uh-huh. The one had better not fuck up what I have. I’ve worked too hard for it. I’m happy. Whoever he is, he’d better be perfect.”
“Not perfect, but damn near it. I promise he will be. You just need to slow down and open your eyes. It’s time. You deserve it.” She rolled over and kissed the top of my forehead. “Just don’t show him this room until much, much later into your relationship. I think those things might scare some men off.” She nodded toward a shelf where dildos of all shapes and sizes were displayed.
“He’s gonna like me for me. And this is me.”
“True that,” she agreed. “Just hide that spiked one at least. And maybe the dragon one you got from Weston’s ma. Take it out once you’ve got him bound to this bed and talking but not before.”
“Girl, I got this.” I huffed on my nails and polished them against my chest.
Two
Terrance
Betty had come into Scarlett Herb again the other night, making the Shizzle Sauce for our cocktails. I’d made her two drinks, in hopes she would loosen up enough to make a move, but she never did. I didn’t know if she’d held back because we worked together on this restaurant collaboration or because I was a stripper man-whore. Whatever it was, we’d been flirty for months, and neither of us had taken it past that.
It wasn’t that I needed sex or love or anything really. The only thing that could make me happier in life right now would be to retire early and live on an exotic beach. But that wouldn’t happen. I had bills to pay, and stripping and bartending paid the bills. The tips I’d received from women were shocking at first. Sure, I knew women were just as horny as men. But I’d had no idea they were willing to pass out the big bucks for me to shake my sweaty johnson in their faces. No complaints here. It was easy money although tiring.
I groggily rinsed out the champagne flutes as I began to prep for Thirsty Thursday at the restaurant. Last night had been Wet Wednesday at The Steamy Clam, which meant I’d stayed there until two in the morning, making lonely women’s panties soaked.
“Long night again?” my boss, Jay, asked, coming around the bar to help me.
“You can say that. Where’s Aiden today?” I asked.
Jay’s brother, Aiden, who was also my other boss, had been absent a lot lately. Their restaurant had taken off this year, and Aiden had been busy scouting new establishments to open our second location.
“Oh, you know, touring real estate. Haven’t found much in Outer Forks yet though. We might end up building. That’s just going to take a huge cut into our financials. Can’t live life without risks. Sometimes, they pay off.” Jay smiled, grabbing a
dishrag and wiping down the bar.
“You can say that again,” I mumbled. “Speaking of risks, what do you know about Betty? She’s Rox’s best friend, so you have to know some details. We flirt off and on but never past that. I think I want to take it to the next level and ask her out. There’s just something about her bossy attitude that I like.”
Jay’s eyebrows creased. He set down his rag, scratching his head and letting out a long breath. “Betty, eh? Well, I know a fair bit about her. I know that she and Rox both come from hard times and that Betty likes to tell people she’ll skin them alive if they ever bring trouble for either of them.”
“Oh, yeah, I’ve gotten that from her plenty … and I like it.”
“Do you now?” Jay smiled. His Australian accent always made me feel like I needed to go back to grammar school. My country twang couldn’t keep up. “A bit of a masochist?” He prodded.
“Oh, who, me? No way,” I said in my huskiest voice. “I wear the pants in all my relationships.” I puffed up my chest and flexed my biceps while drying a wineglass.
“Too bad. Because I do know that—”
The front door to the restaurant flew open as Betty walked through, interrupting our conversation. Her hair trailed behind her as she stomped her heels over to the bar.
“I can’t find my wallet. The last place I had it was here, Mr. Playboy. How am I going to stuff those ones down your pants when you’re swiping my cash out from under me?” She put her hands on her hips and grinned.
“Hold on now! I wouldn’t do anything like that! And I’ve not seen your wallet. I closed last night, and obviously, I’m opening today. Let me check the back, where we keep missing items. Maybe Aiden or one of the other mixologists picked it up.”
“Mixologist? Well, isn’t that a fancy word for bartender?” She rolled her eyes.
“Senior mixologist.” I grinned before rushing off toward the storage room in the back.