A Preposterous Portfolio of Parodies: Free Selections from Spoofs of The Hobbit, Game of Thrones, Harry Potter, Star Trek and More

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A Preposterous Portfolio of Parodies: Free Selections from Spoofs of The Hobbit, Game of Thrones, Harry Potter, Star Trek and More Page 6

by Valerie Estelle Frankel


  ***

  “Henry, Cereals’ dying! We’ve got to save him,” Horrendous screeched. They were back in the sky, flying on their trusty hippogriff, Heidi, who was using her griffin head to preen their legs, and her horse body to whack them affectionately with her tail. Horrendous relaxed a fraction. The past hadn’t happened yet. At least, she thought it hadn’t.

  “Isn’t he evil?” Really asked, even though they’d just answered his question a few pages back.

  Henry straightened to his most dramatic height to respond, and then stared. Around them were floating a stuffy-looking dog and a boy with glasses, an odd blue police box, and a DeLorean.

  Horrendous shuddered. “We’re brushing other franchises. Make sure we avoid them.”

  “Hey don’t tell me—I’m not driving,” Henry said. A quick poll confirmed that none of them were.

  Just then, Heidi spied the DeLorean and, barking cheerfully, gave chase. Henry tumbled off her back, furiously gaining speed as he hurtled toward the ground. At last, the two remaining teens heard a faint thump, and saw a cartoonlike dust puff rise. They stared in horror. “Do-over?” Really asked.

  “Within a do-over?” Horrendous shuddered. “What could happen?”

  “If we don’t, it’s the end of the franchise. And this book doesn’t even have Lord Revolting.”

  “So no battle, no further books, no movie deals.” Horrendous swallowed. “I haven’t even worn a gorgeous dress and done a slow walk-on.” She nodded, biting her lip. “Do-over it is.”

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