by Lauren Smith
In the last few years, she’d forgotten what it felt like to belong to someone else in the dark, where shadows hid all but one’s passions. Alec made love slow and hard, owning her with every deep thrust. He braced his forearms on either side of her head, trapping her with his strength. He obliterated every last bit of fear from the crash with his devastating lips, hot enough to burn the world down. Lips that made her remember fleetingly how she’d once felt before and had foolishly mistaken those feelings for love. She knew better now. This was raw, animal lust and physical satisfaction, nothing more. But she fully intended to enjoy it as such.
When her climax hit, she welcomed the glittering stardust against the backs of her eyelids. She clung to Alec, her nails scraping his shoulders as his pleasure continued to roll in endless tidal waves while he thrust inside her a dozen more times, harder and faster until he filled her womb. He gasped against her neck and his muscles relaxed as he eased down over her.
A sudden sense of loss made her cling to him even harder. It was over. He seemed to sense her thoughts, just like he had on the plane.
“I’m not going anywhere tonight,” he murmured in her ear. “I’m yours.” It was as though he’d known exactly what she’d needed to hear most, and more importantly, meant it.
She relaxed beneath him, allowing her hold on his shoulder to loosen. He eased out of her and repositioned himself to lay beside her. After he lifted the blankets around them, he pulled her into the curve of his body, spooning her into a perfect position. She held onto his arm around her waist, but the exhaustion won out and her eyes drifted shut.
5
Dawn broke through the windows, the sun reflecting off the heavy dusting of snow that had gathered in the corners of the windowpanes. Alec squinted against the light and shifted in bed. For moment he forgot where he was before it all came back in violent flashes.
The crash, the cold, the snowy village, Brie crying at the bathroom door.
She’d looked so young, so vulnerable and raw. The sight of her like that had nearly ripped his heart out. The last thing he wanted was to hurt her or take advantage of her. But when she’d touched him with a trembling hand, it had shattered his control.
Yet he didn’t regret one bloody second of it. It had been one of the best nights he’d ever had, and he wasn’t sure if that was a good thing or a bad thing.
She needed me, and I needed her. We both needed to feel alive after what we’d been through.
Yet a small little voice in the back of his mind whispered that what happened wasn’t just some affirmation of life, but maybe something more. Still, he had no time to date, and she’d been adamant last night that the last thing she wanted was a relationship. Today they would go their separate ways and never see each other again. Until then…
Alec rolled over to curl his body around hers. She was soft and naked, like him; the way he liked most to wake up in the morning next to a woman.
“Five more minutes…” Brie burrowed closer to him and her delectable bottom settled against his very hard cock. Her drowsy mutter was adorable.
“Do that again and I might roll you beneath me,” he whispered in her ear.
She smiled at that. If she’d been a cat, she’d have purred and rubbed herself against him invitingly. For now, he didn’t bother to roll her beneath him. Instead, he lifted her leg, opening her up and stroking her folds with slow, teasing, erotic touches. When she was dripping and wide awake, he slid into her from behind. In response, she moaned softly and clutched at his arm around her waist.
They made love quietly, slowly this time, and he burned every second of it into his mind. The way motes of dust swirled in eddies above her head, glinting in tiny sparkles. The way her dark hair glowed in the morning light, and how the hidden russet strands were illuminated between the darker chocolate tones. He didn’t want this to end, but as she climaxed in a soft gasp, he was compelled to join her only seconds later. As he held her from behind, he faced the reality that in a few hours, this would be over.
They lay together for a long time before he let her slip away. She retrieved her clothes from the floor and rushed into the bathroom across the hall. Alec rolled onto his back and stared at the ceiling. In a few hours he’d be on his way to Merryvale for the holidays with his family, and even though Simon would be there, he was not looking forward to it at all.
When Brie returned, freshly showered, he dragged himself out of bed and fetched a shower kit to take his own. As he washed away Brie’s scent, he knew he was going to miss it. Once he was done and dressed, he found her downstairs in the kitchen with Mrs. Fellers, who had made scrambled eggs and tea.
“You have a good sleep, dears?” she asked them.
“Yes, thank you. We really appreciate you letting us stay the night.” Brie smiled warmly at the older woman. Alec was fascinated with the way her smile lit up her face. Had any woman he’d been with before ever had a smile like that? He honestly couldn’t remember.
“How far do you need to travel?” Mrs. Fellers asked.
“About two hours for me.” Alec glanced at Brie, still curious as to who her client was. If it was anyone noteworthy, he would bet anything that his parents would know them.
“Same for me, I think.” Brie helped their host with the dishes and Alec went upstairs to retrieve their suitcases. His hired car arrived minutes after he’d brought all their luggage down into the front hall.
“Goodbye, Mrs. Fellers.” He hugged the elder woman who blushed and patted his back. Then he turned to Brie who was waiting for him with bright eyes.
“So, this is it,” she said with a shaky smile.
“Bet you’ll be glad to be rid of me, eh?” he joked.
She bit her lip and nodded. “Definitely. You’re such a jerk.”
“Only with the truly annoying ladies.” She laughed at the way he said that. The teasing kept their parting nearer to sweet than sorrow.
“Do you…?” He wasn’t sure what he wanted to say and perhaps it was a mistake, but he slid a business card in her hand. “In case you need it.” He spun and headed down the snowy steps of the cottage and into the waiting SUV. He didn’t dare look back.
As the hired car pulled away from the cottage, he dug around his briefcase for his iPad but his fingertips bumped against the book Brie had let him keep. He pulled it out and stared at the title: No Rest for the Wicked. He opened it to the first page. This was going to be ridiculous, but it seemed more appealing than reading the paper online, at least for the next couple of hours.
The rest of the trip was a blur as he got sucked into the story of the dashing rogue pirate Dominic and his feisty English love who’d hid aboard his captured vessel dressed as a cabin boy hoping to find out what happened to her father.
“We’re here, sir,” the driver announced, pulling Alec out of the story. He had only handful of chapters left, which meant he’d have to find time to finish the book later. He’d been rather surprised by how invested he’d become in the characters and the plot. There’d been a good mystery and a fair amount of sea battles, plus a loyal friendship between the hero and his best friend. And the sex…well…he’d made fun of Brie for it, but the scenes had certainly been good.
He leaned forward and peered through the front window, taking in the grand castle-like structure ahead of him. The lawns were covered in snow and the fifty-foot Cyprus trees, that even during the summer still carried the scent of winter, were shivering with an icy wind. They resembled a huddle of old men in dark green snowy capes.
The tan stones of Merryvale were a bright gold in the winter sunlight and numerous windows flashed as the SUV drove up the gravel drive to stop in front of the tall oak doors of the main entrance.
I’m home.
Alec’s heart gave a painful jolt. Memories fought their way to the surface. He and Morgan racing down the hill, sleds in hand, with coats and caps firmly fixed as they hollered like wild puppies. His grandfather, looking on from the top of the nearest hill, waving at them.
>
That had been the last time he’d seen his grandfather alive. He’d died of a stroke that afternoon in his study on Christmas day. Every Christmas after that was shadowed by the familiar pain. Alec looked away from the house, forcing himself to push the memories of his grandfather away.
The front door opened, and a trio of dogs sprinted onto the snowy driveway, barking like mad. Morgan, Alec’s younger brother, stood there grinning widely. Alec got out and helped the driver with his bags. The dogs were all around him now, jumping at his heels. A dark colored English Springer Spaniel danced excitedly and sniffed his suitcase.
“Hello Copper.” He gave the dog a ruffle of his silky ears. A male white and brown bulldog, Yogi, gave a series of snuffling huffs as he toddled around, inspecting the luggage. “Yogi, old boy.” Alec chuckled as he and the bulldog stared at one another. The last dog, a tall black English lab, wagged her tail and followed the driver around.
“Pepper, come.” He called to the lab. She joined him, resting her head against his leg and gazing up at him in adoration.
“At least the dogs are happy to see you.” Morgan snickered as he came down and embraced Alec.
“The dogs always did have better taste in people than you.” He laughed and smacked his brother’s back before he handed his driver his fare and a tip. Morgan grabbed Alec’s suitcase in a surprising show of sibling kindness. “I’m not dying, Morgan.”
“Don’t be too sure about that. Mum found out about the crash. Dad had your flight info and checked this morning. Mum was making tea when he told her about it. She broke her best china teapot.”
“The blue and white Sadler one?” Alec winced as Morgan nodded.
“Well, it was nice knowing you, Alec,” Morgan chuckled, but then after a moment, his gaze turned serious. “Is it true no one died? Dad wanted to call but he knew it would only upset Mum.”
“Everyone was fine. A few people had some panic attacks, but it was mostly just a good scare.” He didn’t want to think about the flight or the crash because, mostly because it reminded him of Brie.
He and Morgan stepped inside and he set his attaché case down on the floor. The dogs ran past him, with Yogi huffing and snuffling as he brought up the rear. The dogs lead the way into the drawing room where his family gathered in private when the house was open for tours to the public. The house was closed over the Christmas holidays, but it was still an old habit to retreat to the drawing room at this time of day. The red painted walls were enhanced by a gold crown molding he’d always thought looked like some baroque period palace. The furnishings, however, were modern, with leather sofas and comfortable plush armchairs.
“Is that you, Alec?” Julia’s voice was a slightly higher pitch than normal as she leapt from her writing desk in the corner.
He opened his arms and she hugged him. “Hello, mum.”
“Hello mum? Hello mum? That’s all you have to say after you almost died last night and didn’t tell us? “Flight was cancelled…” she scoffed.
“Well, technically it was cancelled,” Alec countered. “Just…after we took off.”
“Don’t be cute with me. It doesn’t suit you.” His mother spun around, scowled, and turned to his father who had abandoned his newspapers and stood from his position by the couch. “He gets that from you. I’m sure of it.”
“I didn’t want you to worry. I’m fine, mum. I’m here, aren’t I?”
“The boy has a point, Jules,” his father said. Byron gently pried his mother off him and embraced Alec.
“I’m sorry, Alec. I’m just a bit rattled. First you and then Ms. Honeyweather. It’s all so dreadful!”
Alec went rigid. “Ms…Honeyweather?”
“Oh right, I hadn’t had a chance to tell you, since you never call me.” Julia shot a judgmental look that only a mother was capable of.
“Tell me what?”
“Remember that I’ve always said I wanted to write a history of Merryvale?”
He had a terrible feeling he wouldn’t like what his mother was about to say.
“So, I decided to do it. A book about our Christmas traditions here at Merryvale. I’ve even hired a lovely… What’s she called, dear?” Julia looked at his father for help. “Not a script doctor, those are for movies.”
“A ghostwriter.” Her father supplied as he scratched Yogi’s head. The bulldog gazed up at Byron with devotion. The two were almost inseparable. Copper and Pepper tended to love everyone equally, but Yogi was the earl’s dog through and through.
“Yes, Ms. Honeyweather. She’s an American. My New York publisher hired her to help me give the book that literary flair.” Her mother’s smile soon faded. “Ms. Honeyweather’s flight was canceled due to the storm. She should be here shortly. We sent a driver to pick her up..”
Alec was never more thankful that his job had trained him to master his facial expressions. He’d had a one night stand with the woman his mother had hired to write a book for her. A woman who would be spending the holidays here with him at the house.
His mother looked at him expectantly. “Well, aren’t you excited for me?”
“That’s wonderful, mother.” He cupped her shoulders and gave her a kiss on her forehead.
She raised a brow. “You’re not at all impressed?”
“I am. It’s just been a long couple of days, that’s all.” He looked at Morgan and his father. “I think I’ll just settle in and be down for tea in half an hour.”
“Of course. Go on then,” his mother encouraged. Alec left them and went into the hall. Copper, the spaniel, followed dutifully at his heels.
“Alec, wait.” His brother caught up with him at the foot of the large staircase. They were only two years apart in age, but it often felt like decades given how different their personalities were. Morgan was a barrister, but despite the serious nature of his profession, he was charming and beloved by all. He was everything Alec wasn’t.
Even as the eldest, Alec had somehow felt separated from his family because of how he’d handled his grandfather’s death. Morgan constantly teased him for being the black sheep of the family. He’d all but abandoned them once he was old enough to make his own way in life.
“Are you really all right, Alec? I mean with the whole plane thing? I didn’t mean to make light of it. You know how I am. Serious stuff scares the bloody hell out of me.”
Alex smiled ruefully at his brother. “I know.” They handled grief and fear so very differently. Morgan indulged in gallows humor. Alec buried it and walked away from anything that could drag it back to the surface.
“Well, if you need to talk…” Morgan offered.
“I’ll be sure to talk to someone else,” Alec teased, but then he laid a hand on his shoulder. “Thanks, Morgan.”
“Simon and Bridget are in the blue suite; in case you want to see them before tea. Their boy is pretty entertaining. He’s at that age.”
Alec skated his hand along the mahogany banister, remembering his grandfather straddling him over it, whispering the secrets of how best to ride the banister down to the bottom.
The previous Earl of Merryvale hadn’t been the stereotypical stiff, grumpy, old British man who harrumphed at boisterous children and drank too much brandy. Walter had been warm, loving, and adventurous. The lingering scent of fine cigars had only added to his charm. Every room at Merryvale held a beautiful, yet starkly painful memory of Walter. It was why coming home hurt so much.
Alec followed the hall on the right, where most of the guestrooms were located, and tried not to think of how Brie would soon be staying in one of these.
Then he chuckled as he realized she was going to panic when she found him here and discovered who he was. He would wager anything she would freak out, but there was no way he could have known. She’d refused to tell him who her client was, and his mother had only just told him about hiring a ghostwriter.
Alec couldn’t deny that part of him was excited to see her again, even if it was a bad idea given how he’d felt far to
o attached after what they’d shared following the crash. There was an undeniable pull, a longing for something more than one night and he knew it would be hard to resist. He couldn’t afford a relationship, not now, not with his job.
They joked at the office about installing a fake graveyard for the tombs of their lost relationships, but the demanding life of an investment banker was no laughing matter. It often meant sleeping and showering at the office, no family dinners, no birthday parties with the kids, or wedding anniversary dinners. People in his line of work didn’t care about or want these things. Neither did Alec.
Yet he knew with alarming certainty that his night with Brie had sown a seed of doubt about his life’s choices. And he couldn’t afford to doubt himself, not at such a pivotal time in his career. He paused in front of the blue suite with it’s two connected bedrooms, and knocked.
Simon’s voice came from the other side of the door. “Just a minute.” Then another shout came half a second later. “No, wait!” The door flung open and a boy of around twelve shot out in the hall, colliding with Alec.
“Oof!” Alec clutched his stomach and stumbled back.
“Sorry, sir!” The boy gasped.
“That you, Alec?” Simon appeared in the open doorway, frowning down at the boy. “I told you to wait, Brendan. You can’t go barreling into people, especially my friends. This is Alec, Morgan’s older brother.”
“You’re Morgan’s older brother?” the boy asked in excitement. It was clear by the way he said Morgan’s name that the man was his own personal hero.
“Er, yes. Hello.” Alec offered his hand and the boy shook it with solemn respect.
“Sorry for running into you, sir. I was excited to go sledding. Mr. Grange said he knew the best spots.”
“Indeed, he does,” Alec agreed. Mr. Grange was the Estate’s groundskeeper.