“That would be nice,” she said, continuing to smile at him.
Yes, it would, he thought. Very nice.
CHAPTER ELEVEN
THE SECOND they walked into the town house so Morgan could pack up his stuff and call his office partner, Mary Jane understood why they couldn’t spend another night there together. The air instantly became thick with unspoken needs. At this rate they wouldn’t be able to spend five minutes alone, never mind an entire evening. Good thing he was leaving.
She watched him walk to the phone and pick up the receiver to call New York. She wanted to be that receiver, cupped in his skillful grip and held close to his sweet, sweet mouth. In her imagination she grabbed the phone, slammed it into its cradle and kissed him hard. The maneuver had every chance of accomplishing her goal of seducing him senseless. She’d seen the way he looked at her.
But she didn’t know what would happen after the seduction was completed. Right now things were good between them, although sexually a little tense. If they were careful and didn’t put themselves in the wrong situations, they should be able to join forces to create the perfect nursery for the baby. Then Morgan would go back to New York. He had to. He had a profitable medical practice there, one he’d been building for several years.
Mary Jane’s friendship with Beth and Ellie had given her inside information about the workings of Maitland Maternity and the medical community in general. When she’d started her job at Austin Eats she’d waited on enough doctors and overheard enough conversations to know how precious a good practice was. You didn’t throw it away without a mega-spectacular reason. She didn’t think sex with her fit that category.
Morgan might be enjoying his Texas experience, and he’d want to come back when he could, but his life would still be centered in New York. She had no faith in the staying power of this attraction, which could have so much to do with timing and not enough with the two people involved. She had a sneaky suspicion that once New York got its hooks into Morgan again, once he’d overcome the shock of losing his wife and settled into a new routine with work and maybe even a social life, he’d forget all about this lust he felt for a young waitress in Austin.
So she wouldn’t seduce him now, and she wouldn’t seduce him in the future. But damn, he was a tempting sight, standing in her living room in his snug jeans and cool Western shirt. His butt got cuter the more she looked at it.
She’d better stop looking at it. As he connected with his office, she went out the back door to check on the bird feeder.
After she’d filled the little glass and wooden house with seed, she sat on one of the two plastic Adirondack chairs she’d bought for her patio. The Slattery back yard had real wooden ones. Apparently they’d left them for the new owners, which was very accommodating of them.
Now that she thought about her glimpse into the new house’s kitchen, she remembered a screened porch in the back. That would be a great place to sit about now, as the day was coming to an end. If she had her choice, she’d furnish it with wicker and fat cushions. Damn, but she could have a field day picking out stuff for that house. And spending more of Morgan’s money.
Despite what he’d said about having plenty, he was getting dangerously free with his money, and she’d have to steer him to less expensive furniture stores or he’d run through his savings and the life insurance before he was done. That wouldn’t be good for the baby.
As if the kidlet knew she was being thought about, she gave a solid little kick.
Mary Jane placed her hand on her tummy. “Your daddy bought you a play house today,” she said. “You’re gonna love it, too. At least I think you will. The living room was pretty terrific, but I didn’t completely check out the rest. Lana says it’s wonderful, though, and Lana wouldn’t lie.”
The baby nudged her, more a gentle bid for attention than exuberant.
“You like this time of day, don’t you, sweetie?” Mary Jane said. “Me, too. Everything winds down, people come home to their families….” She paused as an old fantasy played through her mind. When her mother was alive, she’d lived in that kind of world, where the little family of three gathered at the end of the day to share a meal. After her mother’s death, her father hadn’t come home much, and Arielle had fallen into the habit of taking them both out for fast food.
“I think Morgan will come home to you, kidlet,” Mary Jane said as she rubbed a hand across her pregnant belly. “I don’t think he’s the type to forget about you. You’ll be fine.” She wanted to believe it, even though the thought of this baby stuck in that stark Manhattan apartment curdled her blood. But this house Morgan was buying would help.
MORGAN HUNG UP the phone and headed in the direction he’d seen Mary Jane go. She’d left the sliding glass door open, closing only the screen. He started to slide the screen back to go out to tell her what Chuck had said, when he heard her voice and paused.
Stepping into the room so she couldn’t see him, he eavesdropped shamelessly on her conversation with his baby. His throat closed at the wistfulness in her words. And he knew for sure that if he took this baby to New York with him, he might as well rip out Mary Jane’s heart.
But he couldn’t give up the baby or his own heart would break. There had to be a solution. If he trusted this feeling between them the solution would be obvious. Unfortunately, he didn’t trust his feelings. Or hers. And they both had to be very careful, because they weren’t only affecting themselves with the decisions they made now. An innocent, unborn child’s life hung in the balance, too.
Do no harm. He’d always taken that oath seriously. But sometimes it seemed that no matter which road he took, someone would be harmed. He needed more time, and Chuck had been able to give him that. He opened the screen door and went out to the patio.
She glanced up with a smile of welcome.
Somehow, in two short days, that smile had become essential to him. He couldn’t imagine how he’d make it through his routine in New York without it. At least he wouldn’t have to face that prospect immediately.
“What did Chuck say?” she asked. “Must not have been too bad. You look pretty cheerful.”
He sat in the chair next to her and leaned back. This was what it would be like to come home to Mary Jane every night and share the news of the day. He felt a surge of excitement at the prospect. But maybe he’d be excited about coming home to anyone, anyone at all. Nobody liked being alone. “I’ve been replaced,” he told her.
“What?”
“Not permanently.”
“Oh.” She fanned herself with her hand. “Don’t scare me like that. I pictured us taking the truck back and canceling the deal on the house.”
“I don’t plan on that. One thing I seem to have a lot of these days is money. And despite the fact you think I’m spending it like a drunken sailor, I’m still in very good financial shape.”
She glanced at him with some surprise. “You mean you could, like, buy a whole other house?”
“Yeah. Ridiculous, isn’t it? But all Arielle and I did, really, was work. Except for our honeymoon, we didn’t even travel that much. She was eager for me to build my practice and she made sure the right people heard about me. I take care of some very wealthy little kids. I don’t make as much as a heart surgeon, mind you, but I do more than okay.”
She shrugged. “Then I’ll stop worrying. So who’s replacing you?”
“Chuck heard about a young woman who wants a temporary clinical position until her husband finishes graduate school in June. Then they’ll be moving to Chicago. Chuck’s talked to her and thinks she’s excellent, so he said if it was okay with me, he’d let her fill in until I came back.”
“Wow, that was lucky. Like fate or something.”
He turned to look at her. “Do you believe in that kind of thing?”
She met his gaze. “Is that a loaded question?”
“I don’t think so.” He had to chuckle at her serious expression. “I think I’m just curious. What could be loaded about it?
”
“If I told you I believe that everything happens for a reason, that would mean I must think that Arielle’s accident happened for a reason. And I refuse to accept that. It was a stupid accident, that’s all. I’m not going to pretty it up and say it was part of some grand plan. That would be insulting to her.”
“I agree.” He loved the way she talked to him, opening up her mind and letting him in without any thought of hiding.
“But sometimes when things happen, like this woman being right there, needing a job for the very time you’d like to take a leave from the office, it seems kind of spooky, don’t you think?”
“I do. Like the guy showing up at the airport at the end of a frustrating day of not being able to fly out. It was like I was supposed to stay until he could get there and tell me about the real estate opportunities in Austin.”
She regarded him steadily. “But you didn’t come back to make a fast buck, did you?”
“No. If I had, I’d have tried to drive a harder bargain today.”
Her eyes glowed with the kind of admiration that could make a guy feel ten feet tall. “I wanted you to get a bargain, Morgan. But I have to admit that when I heard about the Slatterys, I decided they probably put a fair price on the house. They don’t sound like greedy people, and I think they deserve what they’re asking, considering they have to give up that beautiful place.”
“I think so, too. I can hardly wait to have the closing and get the keys. But we can start looking for furniture before that. Do you think you can stand having me around a little longer?”
Her blue eyes softened. “You know I didn’t want you to leave in the first place, and I’ll have a ball helping you buy stuff for that house. But you have to go back to New York sometime.”
“I know.” It would be so easy to lean over and kiss her. He forced himself to stay where he was. He watched a little brown bird fly to the feeder. “It won’t be easy, walking into that apartment. It wasn’t very cozy under the best of circumstances. I can’t imagine myself living there anymore. Maybe I can get out of the lease.”
“You probably do need to get a different apartment.”
“Yeah.” And an apartment was still the most sensible place for him to live, even with the baby. After seeing the house today, though, he couldn’t get very excited about a new apartment, even if it turned out to be cozier than the last one. Maybe he’d outgrown apartment living.
But moving to the suburbs would be a big hassle considering that his practice was in Manhattan. If Mary Jane had agreed to come and be the baby’s nanny, then he’d be willing to endure the commute. But that had been a dumb idea from the beginning. She would end up as a nanny-mistress until such time as they both discovered the sexual excitement was gone. Then she’d be SOL.
He wondered if the time Chuck had given him was enough to ride out this attraction and put him and Mary Jane on a friends-only basis. “You’d better give me directions again so I can find my way back to Garrett’s.”
“Right.” She got out of her seat. “Stay there and relax. I’ll get a piece of paper and draw you a map.”
Staying put was the best plan, he decided as he watched her go into the kitchen. Following her would have predictable results. Out here on the patio he was able to control himself a little better. There were walls between each of the small yards, but they were only five feet high, and besides that, the second-story windows would make for excellent spying. A neighbor wouldn’t have to work very hard to see what was going on in Mary Jane’s yard.
She came back with a hand-drawn map and handed it to him. “This should get you there. I also showed you the route to Austin Eats, in case you want to come in for a meal.”
“I could do that, couldn’t I?” The prospect cheered him up.
“I’d be honored if you would.” She returned to her seat.
He studied the map, folded it and tucked it in his shirt pocket. “You know, I was thinking that if we didn’t live under the same roof, this tension between us might ease up a little.”
“God, I hope so.”
Her fervent statement made him laugh as he glanced at her. “That bad, huh?”
“I’ve never wanted sex so desperately—and not had it—in my entire life.”
“Me, either.”
She grinned at him. “And you’re not even pregnant, so you can’t blame your hormones.”
“No, but maybe I’m developing that empathy fathers are supposed to have. Maybe my ankles will start to swell.”
“If they do, you’re doing that on your own. I don’t intend to let my ankles swell.”
He couldn’t help looking at her trim ankles and sandal-clad feet. And there were those sexy red-painted toes with the silver stars winking at him. All that expanse of bare leg began to work on his imagination and made him feel a little grumpy. “Good luck keeping your ankles from swelling, given your job. Are you sure you won’t consider quitting?”
Her smile faded. “No, Morgan, I’m not quitting. If staying here longer means you’re going to start nagging me about that, then maybe you should head on back to New York, after all.”
He gazed at her. His frustration had so many faces. He wasn’t allowed to make love to her, and now he wasn’t allowed to make life easier for her, either. She had no idea how much money he had, especially considering the huge life insurance check that would be waiting for him when he arrived home. All that money, and the mother of his—no, the woman carrying his child—insisted on working in a diner, where she spent a good part of her day on her feet.
Her expression softened. “You really should come in for a meal tomorrow,” she said. “I think if you saw the place, you might understand why I want to work there. It’s not just another greasy spoon.”
“I never said—”
“I know, but you’re acting as if that’s what you think. It’s a primo place to work, and lots of people know it. Shelby has a drawer full of completed job applications, and she could replace me in a minute.”
“But surely she could hold a spot for you.”
Mary Jane shook her head. “Nope. The diner does a booming business and she likes to keep the level of service up. If someone quit when I was ready to come back, then I might get on again, but the help doesn’t tend to quit. Not only do I want to be a waitress, but I specifically want to be a waitress at Austin Eats. I don’t want to lose my place there.”
“I see.” He wondered if her story would be the same if she didn’t have to support herself. If someone offered her a year to be home with this baby, would she take a chance on getting back on the staff at Austin Eats after that time was up? He believed she would. After years of watching mothers, he knew a natural when he saw one.
Arielle had not been a natural. He’d never admitted that to himself, and it came as a shock. She’d portrayed herself as a mothering type of person when she’d recounted her tales of being a nanny for Mary Jane. He’d accepted her self-evaluation without question. In fact, her professed mothering talents had been one of the things that had attracted him.
Yet as he looked through new eyes it seemed as if Arielle had been more a puppet master than a true mother to Mary Jane. Oh, they’d been intimately connected, all right, but Arielle had always been the one who’d pulled the strings.
Mary Jane sighed. “You hate my career choice as much as Arielle did, don’t you? I can see disapproval written all over your face.”
Instantly he tried to erase the frown that must have given her the wrong idea about what he was thinking.
“I don’t disapprove of your career,” he said. “I have no right to approve or disapprove, anyway. I just feel…helpless. Like there’s nothing I can do to help you through this pregnancy. I can’t even offer to be your birth coach, because I won’t be here long enough to take the classes with you, and you might go into labor before I can get here.” He really hated that thought. But first births were so unpredictable, and after this long absence he’d feel guilty saddling Chuck with another one in
four months.
Mary Jane clapped her hands in apparent delight. “Too perfect! My magazine was right on!”
“What magazine?”
“I’m subscribing to a pregnancy magazine, and one of the articles was about fathers who feel as if they’re not included in the process. They warned against the dangers of this, because then the daddy isn’t ready to bond with the kid when she comes out, because he’s been out of the loop for nine months.” She brought one knee up and hooked her arms around it, balancing her sandal on the seat of the chair as she rested her chin on her knee and gazed at him.
In another month she’d have trouble doing that, he thought. He hoped she was prepared. Some women got cranky when they lost their figures so completely. “I can see how that would happen,” he said. “I encourage the dads to bring the kids in for well-baby checks at least as often as the moms.”
“Good for you. I was worried about that bonding thing with both you and Arielle, to be honest. That’s why I sent all those ultrasound pictures and Polaroids.”
He recognized the true mother’s instinctive urge to help her child get a good start in life, even if it wasn’t technically her child. “Did it ever occur to you that if it happened, it was our problem, and you didn’t have to worry about it?”
“No.”
“I didn’t think it would. You’ve had a stake in this baby from the beginning, haven’t you?”
She nodded. “I didn’t expect to. At first I tried not to.” She looked away and then shot him a furtive glance. “I wondered if I should take you up on the offer to buy me some appointments with a head doctor.”
“The offer’s still open, but if you want my opinion, your head’s in fine shape.”
She laughed. “You’re in no condition to judge. You’re probably more screwed up than I am.”
“Probably,” he said with a grin.
She continued to gaze at him, and gradually a soft glow appeared in her eyes. “Well, screwed up or not, you’re looking damned good to me right now.”
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