I called Beck.
As usual, he answered on the first ring. “Hey man, what’s up?”
“Just dropped Sol off at her house.” I paused. Beck usually didn’t tolerate my locker room talk, but I needed to tell him about my night. “And get this. I didn’t even try to sleep with her. What’s wrong with me?”
Beck laughed. That cocky motherfucker. “Nothing’s wrong with you—you just like her.”
“I do. She’s cool and smart. Cultured—she goes to the opera and shit. She took me to the best Chinese restaurant in the city and then we went to see the Blue Moon on Mount Tam.”
“Man, you’re sprung, and you don’t even know it yet.”
Fuck. How did this happen to me? “Well, I kissed her. I’m taking her on a date tomorrow, gonna see how she hangs at a dive bar. But that’s it. I’ll never see her again. We’ll be in Seattle by Monday.”
“Good. I’m glad you had a nice time with a good woman. But Huck, if you like her and you can somehow con her into liking you too, it doesn’t have to be over. You’re a pilot—you can fly anywhere any time you want, remember?”
“Whatever, dude. I just want to have a good time with her while I’m here. I’m not looking for a girlfriend. And I definitely have zero desire to start a long-distance relationship. Even you and Paloma were together for twelve weeks before you left for our tour. Plus, she lived with you. This is nothing more than a weekend fling. It is what it is. Anyway, I’ll be at the hangar at zero six hundred.”
“Sounds good. Later.”
I drove across the bridge back to my hotel. Alone.
How had I fucked this night up? She could’ve been here with me now, but I hadn’t even tried.
Well, the weekend wasn’t over yet. I had tomorrow night to make her mine.
Even if it was for one night only.
Chapter 12
Sol
After Sawyer left last night, I couldn’t sleep. I was consumed by thoughts of him and our kisses. I’d replayed our entire interaction in my head. I’d even dreamed about him. I was so excited to see him today.
I woke early and drove to the base. After walking through the maze of vendors, I entered the press box and waited for the show to start. Excitement rippled through me. Just two days ago, I’d been in that plane. Sawyer had only given me a preview of what he could do. Now I would see what he was really capable of in the air.
The crowd was milling around the base. Little boys and girls with toy planes stood by the gates, waiting to see a glimpse of their idols. Older men with baseball caps that displayed their status as military veterans also gathered around, but my eyes were drawn to a bunch of pretty women in tight skirts and low-cut tank tops, giggling and drinking champagne in the corner of the adjacent VIP box.
The groupies.
A burning sensation settled in the pit of my stomach. Seeing these women showed me the temptation Sawyer must face. But I didn’t hold any ill will toward these women at all. I got it. Hell, I wanted to sleep with Sawyer. He was gorgeous.
I poured myself a glass of wine, adjusted my wide-brimmed hat, and posted a story.
“Hi, lovelies! Today I’m here at the air show where we’ll actually see Sawyer and the rest of his squadron fly. I can’t wait.”
The announcer’s voice rang out. “Ladies and gentlemen, please welcome your Blue Angel pilots!”
Sawyer walked out with the five other pilots in their tight flight suits and matching aviator sunglasses. They stood side by side with their arms behind their backs and then all of them took a wide stance in perfect unison. God, they were so hot standing together. They really did look like rock stars. They began walking in formation, never missing a beat. After they saluted the members of their aircrew, they each walked over to their planes.
The announcer introduced the first plane and then it was Sawyer’s turn. “And flying Blue Angel number two from Davenport, Iowa, the right wing and the Marine Corps representative of the delta formation Captain Sawyer Roberts.”
“Woo!!!!!” I yelled. The announcer’s enthusiasm was infectious, and I beamed with pride that I knew Sawyer. That, better yet, I’d kissed him. Twice.
After introducing the rest of the pilots, the announcer spoke again. “The Blue Angel pilots take pride in personifying the United States Navy and Marine Corps values of honor, courage, and commitment.”
Those words stopped me cold. Honor, courage, commitment.
Sawyer definitely had the courage to fly that plane and serve in the Marines Corps. He had committed to his company and squadron. I couldn’t help but wonder if he could ever commit himself to one woman. Preferably me.
“The Blue Angels are the oldest performing United States military aviation demonstration team. Since 1946, they have exposed all generations to the wonders of naval aviation. And now, gaze up in the sky as our blues take to the air.”
I screamed at the top of my lungs like a groupie. Mötley Crüe’s song “Kickstart My Heart” blared from the speakers. I was so wrapped up in this moment watching Sawyer soar overhead, that I completely forgot I was supposed to be recording the whole thing.
Oh crap.
I pointed my phone toward the sky, but then something caused me to put the phone back in my pocket. My assignment was to post about the Blue Angels. There would be plenty of videos of the actual show and their death-defying formations. Plus, I was still going on a date with Sawyer tonight where I could post more pictures and maybe get a personal story about him.
But, for now, for once in my life, I didn’t want to watch through the lens of my phone. I wanted to experience the show with my own two eyes.
I stood on top of my chair, eager to see Sawyer’s plane.
The first pass was a diamond formation with his plane just inches from the other three. Terror gripped me as they approached each other. He could crash. It was so dangerous. I actually didn’t even blame the protesters for worrying that these Angels could collide and kill civilians on the ground now that I saw this performance firsthand. In my research, I’d read it had even happened before at another air show. I couldn’t even imagine watching them crash live.
But they didn’t crash—they flew perfectly overhead. It was surreal. How many hours had they practiced to make it look so effortless? And now that I had been in that plane, I knew there was more to flying than just skill. Sawyer and these men had to stay calm under pressure and maintain a laser-like focus so they wouldn’t pass out. They had to avoid colliding with the other pilots, or even worse, crashing into the crowds below. One wrong move would mean death.
But Sawyer made it look like he was driving a car.
The music changed to “Dreams” by Van Halen. I was elated from the combination of the kickass DJ, the perfect day, and the excitement of seeing the planes. This was the best time I’d had in a while.
Even though I was standing here alone.
At least I wasn’t watching it from my balcony.
Or on replay on my phone.
I was actually here participating. Living instead of observing.
The other day, I’d been so mad at Sawyer for giving me a hard time about my work, but now, I saw how important it was to be present in my life.
Now four of the planes, including Sawyer’s, were attempting to come from one side while the remaining two were approaching from the other side. I wanted to close my eyes—I couldn’t possibly watch this—they were going to collide.
But they didn’t.
The crowd roared, and desire built in me. I’d just gone from a small crush to a full-on obsession.
Oh my god! I was now a Blue Angel groupie.
Except, I wasn’t a real groupie. I only wanted Sawyer, not the other Angels. And I hadn’t even slept with him.
Then, a crazy idea occurred to me.
What if . . . I lost my virginity to him? Tonight.
Maybe I was just high from the excitement of the air show, but this sounded like an excellent idea.
I mean, why not? I was twenty-
two years old. I was so sick of being a virgin. I’d never expected to still be a virgin at my age, and honestly, it made me feel like a freak. Sawyer had been so calm and soothing with me in the plane, so I was willing to bet he’d be an incredibly patient and experienced lover. And I was certain he was attracted to me. Hell, he had kissed me twice and was constantly telling me how beautiful I was.
Yes! This was a great idea. A one-flight stand with a Blue Angel. My first time would be with an American hero. A fighter pilot. My own TOPGUN. It would be like a fantasy come true.
But how would I make this happen? For some reason, men never openly propositioned me for sex or asked me to go home with them at bars, even though my friends never had this problem. And Sawyer hadn’t even asked to come in last night. Even worse, I’d invited him in, and he had turned me down.
Clearly, I was the issue. Did I give off a prudish vibe? Maybe everyone could tell I was a virgin. Inwardly I shook my head—no, there was no way they could tell. I was just imagining the worst.
I needed to relax. Throw caution to the wind. Make it clear that I wanted him.
They flew for a bit longer, and my neck ached from straining to see them.
Finally, they landed. After exiting their planes, they walked over to the boxes, where their fans awaited.
And their groupies.
My nerve endings tingled when he headed in the direction of where I was standing, though there were hundreds of people here. Would he acknowledge me in the crowd? Assuming he’d even be able to pick me out of all the people gathered here.
There was yellow tape separating the fans from the pilots. Good idea. Someone could jump them. Someone like me.
I waved like a fool, and Sawyer winked at me. Yes, he acknowledged me. I felt like a million bucks.
He finally walked closer toward me, but a little boy with a stuffed toy in the shape of a Blue Angel plane jumped up toward Sawyer.
Sawyer knelt next to the little boy. “Hey buddy, did you like the show?”
“Yes. Can I be a pilot like you?”
“You bet you can. You just have to work hard in school, listen to your mama, and you’ll be here one day.” Sawyer hugged the little boy and the kid’s mom, too. He then posed for a picture.
My breath hitched.
Then some other lady handed Sawyer her baby.
A baby!
Sawyer was cooing with the baby, completely a natural, and I was now dead.
I swear I felt sharp pangs in my ovaries. This was too much emotional overload for me.
By the time Sawyer finally reached me, my hands were shaking. Though he had kissed me last night, suddenly everything felt different. After seeing him fly, I felt so unworthy of his attention. Maybe he would ignore me or cancel our date.
His gaze focused on me. “What did you think, babe?” He flashed me a radiant smile, and I couldn’t help returning it.
“I think . . . I think you’re absolutely amazing. You’ve turned me into a Blue Angel groupie.” I leaned into him and whispered into his ear, “I want to spend the night with you.”
His eyebrow cocked, and he crossed over the yellow tape, leading me to a corner of the press box. He lowered his voice as he asked, “What are you doing, Sol? You’re playing with fire.”
“Maybe I want to get burned.”
He crossed his arms. “Look, I don’t know what you’re doing teasing me like this. Listen to me—I’m a bad guy.”
I shook my head. If only he could see himself the way I saw him—sweet on our date, kind to children at the show, comforting to me when we flew.
“No, you aren’t, Sawyer. It’s just an act. I see you.”
“Babe, this can only ever be a one-night stand. Is that what you want, Sol? Just one night and I’ll never see you again. I won’t even be an Angel next year. I’ll be stationed overseas.”
Why was he resisting me so much? He probably thought I was just toying with him. I nodded my head. “Yes, it’s what I want. I want you.”
He cupped my face. “You don’t strike me as the casual sex type.”
Well, that was the understatement of the year. I’d never had any sex let alone casual sex.
“I’m not. But sometimes even good girls want to be bad.”
A big smile graced his face. He led me back to the crowd, and then, right there, in front of the everyone, he pulled me tight against his chest and kissed me.
“You’re mine tonight.”
Chapter 13
Sawyer
The show was the best one yet of this tour. We’d been perfectly in sync. I thought the vibe would be ruined by the protesters, but even they didn’t dampen our day. There was no feeling in the world like skimming the cables on the top of the Golden Gate Bridge with your five best friends.
But that wasn’t even the best part of the air show.
It was seeing Sol cheering for me in the crowd after I landed. She squealed like a schoolgirl when she saw me. I’d never had anyone come to my shows with the sole purpose of being there to support me. Sometimes, I would watch the other pilots’ wives standing there in the crowds, supporting their husbands, and I’d feel a pang of jealousy. I’d quickly wash away that emotion with some heavy liquor and some cheap sex. But sometimes, I wondered what it would be like to have someone cheering for my triumphs and worried for my safety.
Once I’d greeted Sol, she made my day even brighter by saying the words I’d longed to hear.
“I want to spend the night with you.”
The second I finished with my air show obligations, we bounced. She hopped into my car, and we made out like teenagers at every stoplight. As she kissed me, her hand drifted closer to my cock.
I placed my hand at the top of her thigh, feeling the edge of her panties.
I was dying to sleep with her, but she was nothing like the women I usually hooked up with. Though she was aggressively pursuing me, and she seemed to be totally into me, something was off about her. I kept noticing that her hands were shaking, and she had a scared look on her face.
I pulled away from her.
“I don’t get you, babe. You don’t even like me.”
She smiled. “Why do you say that? I definitely didn’t like you at first, but you grew on me over time. Besides, who said I have to like you? I just want to have a good time. One night. For once, not be the responsible one, the good one. I want to get wild.”
God, what the fuck was wrong with me? She was giving me explicit consent, which I always required, but I still couldn’t shake the feeling that she was hiding something.
Sol’s lips were on fire. She grabbed my cock. “I want you to control me like you control your plane.”
Fuck it. I’d turn off my mind and stop questioning everything. Still though, deep in my gut, I had a feeling something was wrong, and I’d learned to trust my intuition over the years. This gut had saved my life before and the lives of civilians, and it had never failed me. I’d find out what she was hiding once we were in my room.
Finally, we reached my hotel, and I parked.
We left the car, entered the hotel, and went to the elevators. I kissed her again, pressing her tight little body against the back of the elevator. Sure, we’d had a bit of a rocky start, but I couldn’t believe I’d wasted two days with her not having sex. I should’ve fucked her the night of the gala, but in a way, I was glad I’d waited. Our last day together we would have sex. And by tomorrow morning, I’d be in Seattle. A perfect memory to end a perfect weekend.
Let’s go out on a high note.
We reached the hotel room, and once we went through the door, I carried Sol to the bedroom. She kissed me back vigorously, passionately, like she couldn’t get enough.
I’d had enough of this tease. I was going to fuck her all night.
I placed her on the bed and just stared at her for a moment. She was incredibly beautiful, and now she would be mine, if only for one day.
Her hair spread around her face like a halo, framing her gorgeous face. She was
the angel; I was the devil. I kissed her neck, trailing down to her full breasts.
But when I looked back at her face, her lips were quivering. Was she cold? Or worse, scared?
Maybe she started having feelings for me and was upset I’d be leaving tomorrow. I hated to admit it, but I was beginning to have feelings for her, too.
Which was why I had to get away from her before I became addicted to her.
But she was here now. In my bed. I wanted to make sure she enjoyed herself. If she were nervous, I would reassure her.
“You okay, babe? We have all night. I’m in no rush—I can go slow.”
She bit her lower lip and nodded.
Uh-oh. Something was definitely wrong. As much as I wanted to fuck her, I needed to see what was up.
“Sol, what’s wrong? Do you not want to sleep with me? You don’t have to.”
She shook her head. “No. It’s not that.”
This girl was driving me crazy.
“Okay, so what is it? You look frozen. Or afraid. Did someone hurt you?” I pushed that thought out of my head because I couldn’t even fathom some motherfucker abusing her. Even so, rage boiled inside of me. “Did some guy force himself on you?”
“No.”
“Then what’s wrong?”
“It’s just that . . .” She trailed off and looked up toward the ceiling, then around the room. Anywhere, everywhere, but at me.
I cupped her face gently, forcing her to look at me. “Spill it, babe.”
She exhaled so loudly I thought she was going to do the Hick maneuver.
Wait . . . I’d seen this hesitation before in other women. Usually, those ones were cheating on their partners. Once I found out, I’d kick them out of my room. I couldn’t stand cheaters. Maybe Sol had a man. Hell, I’d be shocked if she didn’t.
Jealously, a feeling that I had rarely experienced consumed me. Picturing another man fucking her made me want to punch something. “Do you have a boyfriend?”
She shook her head. “No, Sawyer! Why would you think that? If I had a boyfriend, I wouldn’t be here with you like this right now.” Part of me was relieved to hear she was unattached, but mostly I just wanted to know what was bothering her.
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