by Jasmine Rose
"PLEASE, I'M BEGGING YOU! GOD, DAMN IT! PLEASE!"
It's been two whole hours, a hundred and twenty minutes of absolute hell. The nurses wouldn't let me in, after a while, they got sick of my persistence, so they just locked the door and kept me out. I kept on pounding on the doors separating Lena from me, my anxiety giving me adrenaline. I knew that the old, mute Liam would’ve sat in a corner and cried, but this was before Lena came into my life. I couldn’t give up on her; I wasn’t going to just let her get away from me.
After one last pound at the door, I figured the possibility of them opening the door was improbable. I dragged myself onto the nearest chair, and, placing my elbows on my legs, I buried my head in my hands. Closing my eyes helped the massive headache knocking on every corner in my mind. I took a deep breath; the fresh air circulating in my lungs relaxed me a little.
A hand was placed on my shoulder, startling me. I lift my head to see Adam, pity seeping from his eyes, of which one was black. Actually, we both had one eye that had purple completely surrounding it. Adam had bruises around his neck and a broken arm, whilst I only had bruises in several parts of my body; face, stomach, chest. I hadn’t taken a look but my aching body told me so.
He sat down on the chair beside me and looked at me with a sad expression. "Mate, it’ll be alright," said my cousin, patting my shoulder. I shook my head, and turned to him.
"No, you don't understand. I've lost every single person that I ever cared about. I can't lose her, I just can't." My voice was trembling with fury and slight desperation.
“I know,” mumbled Adam, laying his head on the wall behind him. His tired expression showed that he was thinking about a lot of things.
I knew I wasn’t the only one who’d lost people in his life. My cousin’s father had a big impact on Adam, because he’d ingrained hatred in him. Ever since a young age, Adam would fight his dad, or kick him out of the house. And well, he’d just lost his grandmother too. Although, she wasn’t as close to my cousins as she was to me.
She was and will always be my everything; she was my mother, sister, friend and grandmother who’d console me whenever I was down. She understood me and knew how to help. I felt like Atlas, the Greek Titan who supposedly held the whole world on his shoulders. Grandma would take some of that weight off me, but it never completely left.
But even she was gone.
I was somehow mad, sad and desperado at the same time. Mad, because of how unfair the universe could be. Sad, because I could've saved Lena by being more careful, or, oh, I don’t know, being smart enough to turn on time and take those bottles on my head. The feeling of desperation was because she was my only hope. I just couldn't bear the thought of losing her, losing anyone else. I’m utterly and absolutely sick and tired of it. Call me selfish or whatever, but I think I deserve to have someone.
“Liam, it’ll be fine. She’s not going to… you know,” said Adam, breaking our little moment of silence. I nodded, hoping he was right.
"I can't lose her," I whispered so low I doubted Adam had heard, every drop of energy draining from me. The fight, Lena, everything just made me so tired.
“You won’t, now come on, let’s go check on the ladies.” I looked up at his standing figure, my eyebrows slightly furrowed. I’d completely forgotten about them.
“Where are they?” I asked, my voice coming out raspy.
“With Belle, the doctors saw her state and deducted that she was having an anxiety attack. They gave her medication and she’s staying in a room for a couple of hours, so she can calm down.” Even though Adam’s tone was calm and collected, his expression was begging me to go with him. He wanted to see his sister and was frantically worried about her. I stood up, but then immediately remembered something.
“Does the doctor know that we’ll be over there, in case you know, he needs to tell-“
“Liam, calm down. He knows. Now, let’s go. I’m worried sick about that little annoying sister of mine,” he said, mumbling the last part. I mustered a small smile and followed him.
The impeccably clean hospital halls seemed endless, the smell of medicine and chlorine familiar to my nose. My eyes noticed a few familiar faces and I nodded politely in their direction. The glass walls displayed sick patients with their relatives or loved ones. Of course, the occasional moaning and call for nurses was present. I knew this hospital so well and I wish I hadn’t. The reason was that I came here during Grandma’s sickness.
Although, my eye caught something that made me freeze. Adam stopped and looked at me impatiently. I nodded in the direction of whom I was looking at and his expression instantly softened. A little girl, not older than six or seven years old, was sitting on a chair, with no one by her side. Her face was fallen and her shoulders slumped. Her long, blonde hair was loosely framing her face. She had her arms crossed and directed her face at the ground. I was almost certain that she was crying.
I took small steps in her direction and squatted in front of her. She lifted her head and my eyes met hers. They were pale blue and the redness in them meant that she I was right. Her red cheeks were wet and puffy.
“Hey there,” I said, seeing the hesitation in her eyes. She ignored me and turned away.
“Well, I know about the don’t-speak-to-strangers rule, but I’m not a mean person. I want to be your friend.” That caught her attention; she faced me with hopeful eyes.
“Really?” She asked, slightly nervous.
I nodded eagerly. “I would really, really like to be your friend.”
“I’m Ellie, and what’s your name? I’ve got to know your name to be your friend. I mean, I can’t call you my No-Name friend.” A small smile appeared on my face.
“I’m Liam.”
Her face lit up and her little hand patted the seat next to her. I sat next to her, as she fully turned to me.
“So, tell me what’s wrong,” I said, wiping the tears on her cheek with my hand.
Suddenly, she attacked me in the biggest hug someone her age could possibly give. Her frail arms held my waist tightly and I felt my shirt getting wet. So, I put my arms around her petite body as well. I stroked her golden hair, as her tears came rushing faster. After a few moments of staying like this, she pulled herself away from the hug and sniffled a little. I waited for an answer to my question, as I knew by her expression that she was ready to talk.
“My daddy’s really sad and my mommy won’t talk to me.”
“Why?” I questioned softly.
“Well, it’s because my mommy was in this white bed and then there was a lot of beeping and it hurt my ears. Daddy starts crying and I called mommy to make him happy, b-but she wouldn’t answer me. And then I asked Daddy, why she wasn’t answering me and he said that she was gone. But she was right there! But she won’t answer me, why won’t she answer me, Lee-yum?”
Tears sprung into my eyes straight away and her sad face broke my heart. I took her in my arms and held her tightly, as she sobbed again. I knew exactly how she felt, although I was older than her when I lost my parents. This little angel would have to grow up without a mom and come to a realization at one point, that the reason her mom wasn’t answering her was because she was dead. She was too young to face this.
She pulled away and held my face in her hands. She tipped her head slightly to the right, as if she was confused.
“Lee-yum, why are you crying?”
I suddenly realized that I was fully crying as well. I sniffled and wiped my tear-streaked cheeks with the back of my hand. Ellie wiped my other cheek. I smiled and put her on my lap.
“I’m just scared to lose someone I love very much,” I said, looking at Ellie. Her eyes widened and she patted my cheek.
“Don’t worry, love is always stronger than anything,” she spoke with such certainty and confidence, hope was growing on me.
“Um, Liam?”
I averted my eyes to see Adam, who awkwardly stood there, looking a bit sorry for interrupting my little moment. He scratched the back of hi
s head and ushered at me that we had to go.
“Ellie, I’ll be right back, okay?” She furiously shook her head, hopped off my lap and stood in front of me with crossed arms. She stomped one foot on the ground stubbornly.
“I go wherever you go, Lee-yum.”
“No, you’ve got to go see your daddy. Do you know where he is?”
She pouted her lips and put on a professional pleading face that could crack anyone.
“Yes, I do, but I’m not telling you. You have to take me with you.”
I didn’t know Ellie that long, but I knew she was determined to go with me. But, that was wrong. I huffed and rubbed my invisible beard, watching her hopeful expression.
Out of nowhere, I scooped her up in my arms, hearing her sweet, melodious giggles fill my ear.
“Fine, if you won’t tell me, then I’LL TICKLE YOU UNTILL YOU SPILL!” My hands poked her belly as she squirmed and squealed. I held her tightly with one arm, as she was tiny, and my grip was firm enough to assure that she wouldn’t fall.
“LEE-YUM, PWEEASE STOP!” I immediately froze and looked at her with utter seriousness.
“Are you going to tell me?” I asked, raising one eyebrow. She nodded obediently, a smile present on her face.
“Room 412.”
I gently put her down and took her hand in mine. I looked up to Adam, who was quite amused by this situation.
“I’ll meet you over there, what’s her room number?”
“586.”
“Alright, see you later.”
Adam left, leaving me alone with Ellie. She was grinning.
“Let’s go now shall we?” I ruffled her hair. And we walked towards the hall where rooms starting with 4 were.
The small walk was anything but silent. Ellie talked about her preferred food, her hobbies, how her mom always reads her a story before she went to sleep; her favorite was Cinderella. She was a little bundle of joy, someone whom it was impossible not to smile upon seeing. I knew she would grow up to be a successful and happy person, I just hoped life wouldn’t bring her down. I also wished that she would cope with her mom’s absence, through time.
400,402,404, I mentally counted.
“I also have a sister, she’s really pretty.”
“Really? What’s her name?”
“Scarlett, but I call her Scar. It’s easier.”
408, 410, 412… Here we go.
I stood in front of the open door, my body becoming suddenly tense. My eyes scanned the room and saw a man, probably in his fifties, sobbing uncontrollably beside the bed which contained a covered body. His body shook with every breath he took. On the corner, a girl with long hair sat on a chair, her face in her hands, her shoulders were somewhat quivering; I noticed that she was crying.
“Scar!” cried out Ellie, running towards the girl. “Scar” looked up and engulfed her sister in an embrace.
“Where were you? I was s-so worried!” Her voice was shaky, but her condition was more stable than her dad’s.
“I went outside, and met my new friend Lee-yum.” She pointed at me. Scar averted her gaze to me, and stood up, advancing towards me. Her eyes couldn’t meet mine, somehow. She offered her hand to shake.
I took her hand and nodded. “Thank you so much for bringing her back, I’m Scarlett.”
“I’m Liam, and you’re welcome.”
My voice seemed to wake something in her, because she immediately locked her teary eyes with mine. Their pale ocean blue color was mesmerizing. But they weren’t the beautiful chestnut brown Lena’s were.
“Well, I’ve got to go.”
I squatted to be in Ellie’s level and hugged her closely. She offered me her pinky finger, as I furrowed my eyebrows in confusion.
“Do you promise to stay my friend?”
“I promise.” I locked my pinky with hers.
I stood up and scribbled my number on one of the smaller papers I always had with me. I handed it to Scarlett, whose eyes were open wide. It suddenly clicked into my head.
“Um, it’s not what you think. This is if Ellie needs anything, or if you need a babysitter, I’m here. I-I have a girlfriend anyway.”
Scarlett chuckled dryly, then took the paper and put in her pocket.
“Don’t worry about it; I see that look in your eyes.”
I smiled, and waved one last time to Ellie, then walked away. Although, I stopped almost immediately in my tracks, remembering something.
I turned back and looked at Scarlett.
“I’m really sorry for your loss.”
She nodded, fresh tears already falling from her eyes.
And this time, I walked in the direction of room 586, hoping that I wouldn’t get any bad news. This world deserved a little happiness.
After a couple of minutes, I finally reached the room. The door was open, so I immediately went in. The first thing I saw was Annabelle, peacefully sleeping on the bed situated in the middle of the room. Catherine was by her side, completely expressionless. Mrs. Winter was sitting on a chair, silently weeping. Adam and Tori were sitting on the other side, my cousin hugging Tori as she cried. I knew for a fact that they weren’t crying about Annabelle.
“What is it?”
The room stayed silent, apart from the weeping and hiccuping. A pin could drop. Frustration made me nervous.
“Did the doctor come?”
I took their silence as a yes. I suddenly felt weak and all I could hear was my heart pounding at an incredible speed.
“What did he say?” I whispered, barely audible.
No answer.
“Tell me, please! I need to know she’s not dead. She’s not gone, right? Please tell me she’s not.” I pleaded, looking at Adam, knowing that he would be able to tell me. He shook his head as a no and I sighed in relief. But the expressions everyone wore still worried me.
“Adam, tell me.”
He cleared his throat and then stood up so he could be facing me. I saw the hesitation in his eyes and braced myself for his next words.
“Well, as the bottles were full, and the glass hit her cranium with huge power, which affected her brain, that caused head trauma. That led to…” He trailed off, his gaze now glued to the ground.
The temperature in the room had suddenly dropped a hundred degrees. “Just come out with it.” Adam’s eyes met mine, and seeing the pity and sadness in them, I prepared myself for the worst.
“Lena’s in a coma.”
25
Hold You
"The worst day of loving someone is the day you lose them."
~Elena Gilbert~
Liam Christopher Black
I finished my History test, certain of getting at least a 90%. I'd studied my butt off last night and information about Renaissance was still fresh in my mind. Mrs. Brown shot me a small smile as I handed her my exam. I nodded in response, smiling was an impossible thing to do these days. Holding my new leather jacket in one hand, I opened the door to leave. Unlike most teachers, Mrs. Brown was kind enough to let the students go as soon as they finished their test. But of course, this wasn't a midterm evaluation; these were over before the Christmas vacation. Opening my report card last week, I’d received no surprise. I was still a straight A student. That was one of the things that hadn’t changed.
Heading towards my locker, I earned some stares, but that was nothing new. The only thing that may have differed was that a few girls sent me flirty stares, which I replied to with a stony hard glare. I stuffed the books I would need in my bag and slammed my locker. I put my jacket on and went out of the school.
Frankly, this place felt unwelcoming and all I could do was stay silent to the not-so-secret whispers, that hadn’t stopped ever since Christmas break. Although, the only thing that kept me here was learning. I was determined to finish my year, with high scores and I wanted to get a scholarship in any university. I wasn’t really sure about who I wanted to be yet. As nerdy as this sounded, I also loved learning and studying.
I patted my pocke
ts, checking to see if my keys and cell phone were there.
The final bell rang, signaling the end of a Friday school day, its noise fading in the background. I could almost see the rushing students, laughing and chatting with one another, not possessing a care in the world. I started the car’s engine and headed towards Sainte-Catherine’s hospital.
Where else would I go anyway?
Home was dull and empty. Catherine was constantly at work, Adam and Belle spent their days at University. The homely spirit in the house had been broken. Ever since that damned day at the restaurant, Annabelle had gone through a severe case of depression.