Hiring Mr. Darcy

by Bowman, Valerie

  He rolled over and stared at the ceiling. “I wish I knew.”

  “Ever tried telling her you like her?” I offered.

  He scrunched up his nose. “Oh, like we’re in the fifth grade?”

  I nudged him with my elbow. “I’m not suggesting you write her a note and leave it in her locker or anything. I just wonder why you don’t come out and tell her.”

  He expelled a breath. “It’s not that simple. She’s got a boyfriend.”

  My mouth formed an O and I winced. “Ooh, that’s tough then. I understand.”

  “You agree that I shouldn’t tell her?” he asked.

  “Not if she and the boyfriend are really serious. That would just be unfair to everyone.”

  “Yeah, I guess you’re right.” Jeremy waved his wine glass in the air. “Enough about me. What about you? What do you plan to do about Harrison?”

  I snorted. “I don’t know anymore. The truth is, I guess we really just need to talk. We were supposed to get engaged this Christmas.”

  “Really?” Jeremy’s voice sounded surprised.

  “Yep. And now that’s all up in the air. I always said cheating was a deal-breaker.”

  “What if it turns out it was just a kiss? For all you know, she kissed him knowing you were coming around the corner. Will you break up with him then?”

  Of course, I’d thought of that, but had discarded it as stupid wishful thinking. “He did look pretty serious when he said it was a misunderstanding. I don’t know. Do I throw away nearly three years over one lousy kiss?”

  “You’re the only one who can answer that,” Jeremy said. “But you did kiss me, too. I’d say you’re even.”

  “I know.” I sat up on one elbow again and took another sip of wine. “I have my whole life planned. It’s all written down right over there.” I squinted one eye and pointed at the day planner that was sitting on the desk near the window. “My whole life is in there.”

  “And marrying Harrison is part of the plan?” Jeremy asked.

  “Yes.” I nodded, but I wanted to cry. Why, why, why couldn’t this whole thing be going the way it was supposed to go? Why had everything fallen apart?

  Jeremy’s voice was quiet but firm. “All I know is if you were mine, I’d never choose a Megan Fox wannabe over you. I wouldn’t care what my boss said.”

  That really made me want to cry. No one had ever said anything so nice to me before. Harrison was so perfect for me on paper. Why didn’t he say nice things like Jeremy did? “We’re planning a June wedding,” I breathed. “It’s all there, in the planner. If I change it, I don’t know who I am anymore.”

  “Is your Future Husband Checklist there too?”

  “Yes,” I admitted, feeling my nose turn red with shame. I’d told him about the FHC while drunk, hadn’t I?

  “Can I see it?” Jeremy asked.

  No one but myself and Ellie had ever seen the FHC. But since things were already crazy and bound to become crazier, I figured why not. I placed my wine glass on the table next to me, slid off the bed, and grabbed my planner from the desk. I climbed back into the bed, propped my back up with pillows against the wall, and set the planner on my bent knees. I flipped it open and turned to the page where I knew I’d find the list.

  Jeremy propped himself up beside me and stared at the list. “Wow. You’re serious. You really do have a checklist?”

  “My psychologist suggested it,” I said defensively.

  “Can I see it?” he asked, reaching for the planner.

  “Here, but no making fun of it. You’d probably find the right woman too if you had a similar list. Only yours would need to have ‘no current boyfriend or similar’ on it.”

  Jeremy snorted. His eyes scanned the page and he mouthed the words as he read the list. He was mostly silent until he asked, “How many kids do you want?”

  “Two,” I said with a sigh.

  “A boy and a girl?” he asked.

  “As long as they’re healthy, I don’t mind.”

  Finally, he finished and flipped the planner closed and stared at me. “Look, Meg, I know you’ve got your whole life in this thing, but plans are made to be broken, and I’ve noticed yours are written in colored pencil. And you have a matching eraser.”

  Chapter 26

  Sunday

  The grand ball was just beginning when Jeremy and I walked into the ballroom. The ball wasn’t held in the tents near the crescent. It was held in the most perfect of all places, the Upper Assembly Rooms at Bath, a place where Jane Austen herself had been. It was a grand venue that never failed to take my breath away with its columns and wainscoting and gorgeous alcove for the orchestra. Tonight, with the entire assemblage dressed in Regency period clothing, it actually felt as if we’d all managed to turn back the clock to arrive in 1813.

  My ball gown was a silver concoction with a high waist and tiny embroidered flowers and swirls. I had a matching silver reticule and slippers. I’d managed to put up my hair in a chignon and actually thought I looked halfway decent.

  Jeremy looked like he’d stepped out of the pages of the novel itself. His all-black evening attire, black boots, tight black breeches, and a black coat, blended with his silver waistcoat and white shirtfront and cravat, combined to set off his tan and his jade-green eyes. He was Regency McFox tonight. He looked better than I’d ever seen him. Oh, and he smelled good too. Like Irish Spring soap or something I wanted to sniff more. He towered over me as usual, and I had never been prouder than walking at his side into the ballroom.

  I’d managed to avoid Harrison all day. Jeremy and I had actually spent the entire day exploring the town. We’d had tea at the Pump Room and gone on a tour of the Roman Baths for which the town had been named. I’d managed to forget about the stupid seven I’d caused us to receive in the talent competition, for a few hours at least. The only hope we had of winning tonight was if Harrison and Lacey messed up. It was a long shot, but it was possible. At the same time, Jeremy and I would need an overall ten for sure. Luckily, we’d done a lot of dancing in his woodshop.

  “Ready?” Jeremy asked, squeezing my hand right before we entered the room.

  “Ready.” I nodded. “You?”

  “As ready as I’m going to be.”

  “You look exactly like Darcy, only better,” I said, smiling at him.

  “Thank you. You look exactly like Lizzy, only better,” he replied.

  It didn’t take me long to spot Harrison and Lacey. Lacey was wearing a white gown that seemed somewhat demure from the back, but was a full assault of décolletage from the front. “As if Lizzy Bennet would have ever been on display like that,” I huffed under my breath.

  “What was that?” Jeremy leaned down to hear me better.

  “Nothing.”

  We danced the minuet, the cotillion, and the quadrille and managed to score perfect tens on each. Jeremy was right. We weren’t entirely out of it yet. Lacey had managed to trip during the quadrille, and had a point taken away. We were only two points behind. I’d brought my day planner with me to tally the scores of each round and keep track.

  After the quadrille, Jeremy came up to my side. “I need some fresh air. I’ll be back in a few minutes.”

  A few minutes turned into ten. The groups were lining up to perform the waltz. We were scheduled to go last, no doubt a bone they’d thrown us because of the way I’d screwed up yesterday during the acting, but I was still nervous. I grabbed my day planner from our table (because I never left it anywhere alone) and hurried out of the ballroom, into the corridor, and out of the building into the street. The grand columns of the building behind me, I glanced back and forth down the stone-tiled street for Jeremy. He was nowhere to be seen. Some of the other contestants were milling about with a few of the spectators, but no Jeremy.

  I wandered around the side of the building, hoping I might find him. I made my way down the alley along the side and had nearly turned the corner to the back of the building, when I heard a noise behind me and whirled ar
ound to find Harrison there. He seemed out of breath, as if he’d jogged to catch up with me.

  “I didn’t mean to scare you, Meg,” he said, holding up his hand in a conciliatory manner. Yes, he was definitely out of breath.

  “I’m looking for Jeremy,” I said, wanting to leave him there and continue my search for my partner.

  Harrison stepped in front of me, blocking my path. “Look, Meg, I know how awful it looked with Lacey the other night, but I swear to you it wasn’t mutual. Lacey leaned in to kiss me precisely when you came around the corner. I never had an inkling before that she was interested in me.”

  I pressed my lips together tightly. I guess we were doing this right here, dressed to the nines, in the alley next to the Upper Assembly Rooms.

  “The timing seems convenient,” I replied, clutching my planner to my chest. “And you did have an inkling because I’d told you. Or tried to at least.”

  “I admit I’ve been naïve,” Harrison continued. “But I truly never thought a woman like Lacey would be interested in a man like me.”

  It was so close to what my own thoughts had always been. I bit my lip. I wanted to believe him, but the truth was that I still couldn’t forgive him for tossing me over for Lacey to begin with. I’d thought about it a lot last night and most of the day today. Jeremy’s words from last night rang in my memory. “If you were mine, I’d never choose a Megan Fox wannabe over you. I wouldn’t care what my boss said.” That was the issue, really. It might not have been on my checklist, but I wanted a man who wouldn’t toss me over for job or country. If that was too much to ask, then so be it.

  “We both really want tenure,” I had offered lamely to Jeremy once when I’d been defending Harrison for his indefensible behavior.

  “Some things are just more important than your career,” Jeremy had said, the night we’d eaten pizza in a half an hour, because like a crazy person I’d wanted to get home to grade stupid papers.

  That was Jeremy, wasn’t it? A man who’d thrown off the corporate handcuffs to work in his shop with his smiling dog all day. He wasn’t being trite. He’d meant what he said. He’d changed his whole life for that belief. He truly wouldn’t choose someone else over me just to please his boss.

  “Meg,” Harrison said. “I struggled for a time with feeling betrayed by you. Your decision to enter the competition with a new partner was difficult for me to accept at first.”

  My mouth fell open. “I betrayed you?” I echoed. “It was difficult for you to accept?”

  “Yes, but I’ve forgiven you. I realize it was a mistake. I made one, too, not realizing Lacey’s intentions. You’ve got to forgive me too, now.”

  I shook my head in disbelief.

  “We can both blow off this competition,” Harrison continued. “Let Migel win. I don’t care anymore.” He covered the distance between us and dropped to one knee, pulling my free hand into both of his. “I know we hadn’t planned this until the holidays, but I bought you a ring today. Will you marry me?”

  My breath caught in my throat. Was this really happening? Was Harrison really proposing to me in the middle of an alley in Bath after all that had happened?

  I didn’t even get a look at the ring. A noise behind Harrison caught my attention. I looked up to see Jeremy standing there in the moonlight in his full ball attire. He looked so handsome that he took my breath away. How much had he seen? Harrison was still on one knee. It was obvious what was happening.

  “Excuse me for interrupting.” Jeremy’s voice was clipped. He turned on his heel and stalked away, back toward the front of the assembly rooms.

  My heart was beating a rumba in my chest. Kneeling in front of me was everything I thought I’d ever wanted, security, a Ph.D., a husband who could intelligently discuss the Luddites. Walking away from me was Jeremy, a man who had memorized lines from a book for me, who’d remembered that I got car sick, and who’d traveled across an ocean to dress up in fancy pants for me. And damn it, he was right. My planner did have a matching eraser. A really cute one.

  Harrison stood, my hand still clasped in his. “We can be married next June. It’ll be perfect.”

  Perfect? I used to put so much stock in that word. But at the moment it meant nothing to me. I stared up into his handsome, familiar face. “Oh Harrison, perfect’s not what I want anymore. The last couple of weeks have taught me just how much prejudice I have, in addition to pride. I’ve been an awful snob and a stuck-up tight ass. But now...” I smiled from ear to ear. “I just want to be happy.”

  Harrison’s smile crumpled into a frown. “What? I don’t understand.”

  It started to rain. Of course it started to rain.

  “I know you don’t.” I shook my head. “But I do. We need to break up. But don’t worry. No hard feelings. We can still be friends.” I pulled my hand away from his and shifted my planner to my newly freed arm. Then I lifted my skirts, pushed past Harrison, and raced down the alley after Jeremy.

  When I got to the front of the assembly rooms, Jeremy was nowhere to be seen, but Patsy was leaning against one of the columns drinking a high ball. I hurried over to where she stood under the portico, beneath the columns out of the rain.

  “Patsy, have you seen Jeremy? Did he go back inside?” I moved to enter the building.

  “I saw him,” she drawled. “But he didn’t go inside. He’s gone.”

  “What?” I froze.

  She took a drink and nodded out into the darkness. “He left.”

  “In the rain?” I stared into the darkening, rainy sky, completely confused.

  Patsy shrugged. “Didn’t seem like he even noticed the rain, if you ask me. Love will do that to a bloke.”

  “Love? What? Did he say anything?” I lifted my skirts with my free hand. I was frantic to find him, but I wasn’t entirely sure which way to go.

  “He said you were ditching the contest for Dr. Macomb. Said he heard Dr. Macomb say that you were going to let Migel win.”

  My heart pounded. Oh, God. Had he decided I was going to abandon him for a proposal from Harrison? “No, I’m not. Is that all he said?”

  “Just now, yes, but earlier he had a lot more to say.” Patsy took a healthy swig of her drink.

  I turned to her and searched her face. “Earlier? What else did he say?” The woman was speaking in riddles. I wanted to shake her. Even if it would mess up her beehive.

  Patsy took a long, slow sip of her drink. “I talked to him a bit ago when he came outside for some air. I nearly choked on my throat lozenge when I saw him all done up in his finery. Most handsome bloke I’ve ever seen.”

  “Yes, he’s extremely good-looking,” I nearly growled. “Please tell me what he said.”

  “Seriously,” Patsy continued. “I’ve seen my fair share of these re-enactors over the years. But that young man is the first one I’ve seriously wanted to shag.”

  I bit the inside of my cheek and counted to three. No good could come of shrieking at Patsy, no matter how much I wanted to.

  “Not that he’d take me up on the offer, mind you,” the older woman added. “He’s madly in love with someone else.”

  My stomach did a somersault. Oh, God. Had Jeremy told Patsy who he was pining for? “Who?” I blurted, not caring if it had been a private conversation. She shouldn’t have brought it up if she didn’t want me to ask questions.

  Patsy stirred her drink with the little straw in it. Then she pointed straight at me. “You, Dr. Knightley. He’s loved you since he was fifteen.”

  “What?” The air sucked from my lungs and I nearly crumpled to the ground. Letting my skirts drop, I pressed my hand to the cold stone side of the building to hold myself upright. “What?” My brain throbbed with the news.

  “Yep.” She slowly shook her head back and forth. “The lad’s got it bad for you. Told me himself.”

  “For me?” I pointed at myself this time, my heart pounding. Had the world gone mad? “You must be joking.”

  “I wouldn’t joke about something as im
portant as true love,” Patsy replied. “Besides, you would’ve noticed it yourself if you didn’t always have your nose in that damn planner.” She pointed to the planner with disgust. “You’re so busy planning everything that you didn’t even notice the most handsome bloke in the whole place has the hots for you. I told him you’re a clever one, but sometimes you can’t see what’s right in front of your face.”

  I gulped and swallowed and made the weird strangled-cat sound.

  “I tried to convince him that he should tell you how he feels,” Patsy continued, “but he said you already had your mind made up and your life planned out. Plus, he said you were going to marry Dr. Macomb and telling you how he felt would be unfair to you.”

  Oh, my God. It was all true. The truth and the fact that I’d had my head up my ass about it this whole time hit me like a stack of term papers dropped on my head. “Which way did Jeremy go?”

  She shrugged. “If I was guessing, I’d say toward the train station.”

  I spun around. The train station was too far to walk. He’d be looking for a taxi. I had to find him fast.

  I believe I’ve previously mentioned the universe’s penchant for creating dramatic moments in my life. I picked up my skirts and turned my back on Patsy and ran out into the rain, down the cobbled streets and around the side of the building in the general direction of the train station. The rain made my chignon fall over like the melted top of a wedding cake.

  “Jeremy!” I shouted, finally seeing his dark figure far ahead of me, a silhouette against the streetlights. He stopped and turned toward me. He looked so handsome, so heartbreakingly handsome in his boots and skin-tight breeches and cravat.

  He waited for me to catch up with him. I ran into his embrace, and wrapped my arms—planner and all—around his neck, and kissed him for all I was worth.

  He pulled away almost immediately. “What are you doing, Meg?” Rainwater streamed over the brim of his hat.