Again and again was Naitty proposing to Semadar, but she would be still delaying her answer.
“If you hesitate because of my age,” he said daringly, “you can try to be in bed with me. I’ll shake you, as nobody can, and I’ll teach you such sexy positions, that… ” he knew he would make her angry by saying that, but wanted to challenge her: She has to say ‘Yes’, or even if it is a ‘No’- let it be final and absolute.
“Naitty, it’s better that you concentrate in learning some things that are my interest and fill my life. I’m still feeling that you have to meet my cultural background, and fill some gaps… I will continue to be a singer- even if I agree to be engaged to you.”
“I swear it will be a honor for me,” he said enthusiastically in Hebrew, “I am not so wicked or ignorant or extreme religious – to avoid you realize a thing, that is rooted in your ‘Neshoma’…
I mean: in your soul and spirit and love-of-life. I am sure we can handle all that.”
“I have brought you a book about music,” said Semadar, “and about how words should meet melodies, and so on. Please read it carefully and we’ll talk about some ideas written in it.”
“Of course I’ll reads that,” he promised.
He really tried, while he was alone in his hired room. It was a very hard book to read. But then Effy came to that common room, and Naitty was happy to stop his hard trial. He knew he should still walk quite a long road, but his wheels were stable on it, slowly riding to the right direction of his wishful target.
It was the last day of Humik’s vacation. He had tried again to meet Semadar, and was walking toward her dwelling.
At that time Naitty and Effy had just entered Senadars room. They were talking, while Semadar was preparing them coffee, that she would bring to the table with pieces of an English pie.
“Everything is in the hands of Heaven,” she heard Effy saying in Hebrew to Naitty, “God would like to make the people of Israel stand again in a test…there are talks in the papers about an impending war.”
“I am not sure it will happen soon,” said Naitty, “I’m more optimistic than you…”
A ring was heard from the front door. Semadar rushed to open, and Humik came in, with his small Uzi submachine gun in hand.
But not for mere impression he had brought it, so he said.
“My unit was simply just driving from the North to South. Now we have gotten two free hours, to take a little rest, to refresh and eat something.” Humik lied to Semadar. He discerned Naitty and Effy inside the room, and refused to involve them or her in his motive for moving now to the Team Commanders course.
Semadar asked Humik to enter the room. She introduced him to the two guys there, using her weak English:
“This is Humik, that you know about already from New York.
I think that Naitty saw him, and Effy also said that maybe he…”
She indicated Humik to shake hands with them, which he did.
“I was not familiar with him in America,” reckoned Naitty, “but I’ve heard about him.” He smiled, but Humik remained cool.
“You have not met yet in Israel,” said Semadar, “now the time has come.”
“We’ve already been a few months here,” said Effy to him, “we are glad to see you in uniform. Hopefully you won’t be fighting.”
Humik’s blood was boiling in his veins. He imagined that some vapour covers the air, and somebody blows stinky hot wind into his dress. Who knows why am I so upset?- he said to himself.
I feel here like in hell, it’s a furnace heat.
“I will go out to the terrace,” he told Semadar, “maybe I’ve taken a too long walk in this warm noon.”
He opened the door to the terrace, and the breeze, comimg from the nearby mediterranean sea coast of Tel Aviv, improved his feeling. He returned to the room.
“We have quarrelled in New York about something,” mentioned Effy in English, turning to Humik, “D’you remember?”
“I don’t think that here is the place to raise an issue from the past,” answered Humik. Effy continued to challenge him.
“It was an important one,” he said, “As the place, that we were standing in, was most important.”
“Don’t force me to deal with a pile of a forgotten shit.”
“a pile of shit, that you… had lied with.”
Semadar and Naitty were changing looks, and Naitty was angry on Effy, who stood up, red faced, waving his hand toward Humik. Naitty grabbed him by his elbows, then pressured him to retreat, saying vehemently: “You – don’t try to quarrel here.”
Then he stood near Humik and smiled to him, like trying to be friendly. Humik’s face remained serious. He saw that Semadar was looking at Naitty, the ‘Fight Cooler’- in interesting eyes, almost in worship. He did not know if she had understood all Effy’s words, and what was the issue of the talk. He felt frightened suddenly, as he had known that nobody there was at his side. ‘Who knows’, he said to himself. ‘Maybe they were plotting all that before? But if he talks directly and explicitly about Raphaella, better that I go away immediately, so as not to be embarrassed… No, I’ll tell damned Effy something, that would make a mess in his mind, and of course in Naitty’s.’
“Mister Effy Freulich,” Humik said, this time in Hebrew, so that Semadar would well understand, “In a quiet and calm room like this- nobody should talk about milk that had been spilled. Or about a corpse found in the water.”
“What have you meant by saying that?” shouted Semadar at Humik in rebuke, “Why do you, men – have to speak like that?”
“I don’t know about what he was talking,” said Effy.
Had Humik been looking under Naitty’s yellow-dark beard, he would have seen his burning cheeks and some convulsion that had passed them twice. But from outside – nobody could have seen that. However, Naitty was like promptly calmed down. Looking at his watch,. he rose from his seat and told Effy:
“Really, I think our visit has come to an end. We have still to visit Shosh Halevy in Ramat Gan. I’ve promised to bring her twenty sausages. Come, Effy.”
Effy obeyed him, and both shook hands with Semadar and went out. In the following five minutes, Humik told Semadar about his life in the Seed settlement – and was listening to Semadar’s satisfaction from her Band’s Shows: She had exhibited to him some recent press ‘reportages’ and articles about the Singingirls, and also pohtos that were printed. ‘and soon will be outcoming the first Gramophone Record of our songs,’ said Semadar proudly.
Humik mentioned again: ‘Be cautious with the elder bearded chap.” Then he said: “though today – he was very sympathetic.”
While the cousins were inside the transporter, Effy asked Naitty in English:
“What does this soldier know, that we don’t? Naitty, had something happened to your ex-girl friend?”
“You had been with me… when we left America,” said Naitty and his beard was trembling.
“You know? I have received a letter from my Mom. You drove yesterday very early to Hadera. So, I was the mail collector.”
“What .. had your Mom… written?”
“That a month, or less- after we had flied to Israel, her neighbor – Mirel, read in the Yiddish newspaper… ’Forwerts’, about a Jewish girl, that her death was investigated.”
“Oy vey! You mean: Raphaella? Has something happened to her?”
“Yes , she is no more alive. She’s made suicide. So wrote my Mom. The corpse was found in a half empty swimmimg pool. In a rotten condition, they said. Police announced it was a suicide. That was their conclusion.”
“She was really desparate,” said Naitty, and his hands were trembling. He nervously and unintentionally turned the wheel, so the the vehicles was already on a sidewalk. It slowed down but did not stop.
“No, she was a strong personality.” He said, and the transporter quite returned to drive straightlined on the street, “I wonder, if all that is true. You ask your Mom to read again – what they were telling in the papers… Oh, h
ad my financail situation been better, I would have remained with her. Poor girl.” His eyes were wet; but as Effy continued to talk about his previous discussion with Humik- Naitty was glad that he had not looked quite at his nervous movements.
“I doubt if Humik wanted to hint about her,” said Effy.
“Maybe he was just throwing a sentence about a corpse, damn him,” said Naitty, “You could understand, that it was very unpleasant for him, that you had mentioned all that. Beacause Senadar was present. God will save her from any trouble. We have to get her out of that guy’s influence.”
“Like you- I also don’t believe, “ said Effy, “in a pure friendship between a girl, married or unmarried, with a nice guy like him.”
“You are right.” said Naitty.
“You know? I heard from my girl friend Hedwa, that Humik had a trial in New York. He had been caught in some bad business of fake Dollars and drugs. If so, he is a serious criminal.”
“With God’s help,” said Naitty, “our years here will pass in a just manner. We won’t entangle ourselves by any criminal activity.”
At that night – it was hard for Naitty to fall asleep.
‘I cannot write about all that to aunt Hynda in Brooklyn,’ said Naitty to himself, ‘because I fear that NY police may still be looking after me. They may open my enveloped letter– by their tricky abilities to hide any trace of peeping inside. On the other hand, to remain as a blindman at noon, is also very unacceptable. I must know if they still inquire or what are their speculations… Maybe I can take Effy… for being a postman or mediator. He would send a letter to his mother. They would trace his letters too. I doubt if he can restrain himself and not chat on any subject, icluding about that serious case. So, everyone should walk to his fate, go to his shell, find his self determination… I cannot contact Humik (Semadar would certainly know where and how to contact him): If I ask him – as Semadar’s friend, or as a Jew who cares about another Jew, who had loved her( And I’m sure he had known about me and her, and now knows more about the finding of her corpse). No. Both are now my enemies: Effy as well as Humik, regarding that issue… God has made it, that till now- nothing was reqested by NY police or by the Israeli police. They know my name and address, as I have been registered in the Interior Ministry Office here. So…Don’t I see a mountain’s shadow as a real mountain?… Now I will try to sleep on my right side. Maybe my heart will be pounding weaker, like a worn out clock. Oh, God. Please don’t let me collapse, please let me live in self integrated peace, without much noise around. Yes, in a certain outrageous second I have risen – and done that to her, knowing she had been God’s enemy. She had not believed in Him, and tried to pretend a miser, poor girl, that had been foced by the the hard circumstance of her life- to lie with more than twenty man, so she had admitted to me. She hanged herself on me, whom she saw as her savior. No. I…better that I won’t know more about that case. And may God send the guy Humik – out of Israel. He should better return to U.S. – we don’t need him here. He volunteered to one of the army’s best units, only for the sake of fulfilling his patriotic stupid pride. He is just a kid; why do I have to think about him at all? I hurt my spirit by these meditations. I’ll avoid taking a sleeping pill, I fear from that. I may exaggerate in the dosage. God, help me. Amen.”
CHAPTER 45
To America and Back Page 45