She knew she’d never forget. He was gentle as he made love to her mouth, slowly relearning all the spots inside that were made just for him. He kissed her like that for what felt like hours, reminding her of the times when they were younger. When they knew they couldn’t go further but they could kiss and make out and he could grind himself against her, and it was hotter than the sexual act itself.
His thick erection slid over and over her sex, gliding against her clit, rocking her ever so slowly to orgasm. She’d forgotten what these kinds of make-out sessions were like. The sweet intensity. The deep kisses. Hands moving everywhere. And hips rotating over and over until the heavy waves came at her almost out of nowhere, then consumed her.
“Oh God, coming, coming, I’m coming,” she whispered on a ragged moan, the hard press of his cock thrusting against her sex.
Only when she’d succumbed to her last tremble did Ryder speak. “Eyes on me, sweetheart.”
She hadn’t realized she’d closed them. Forcing her heavy lids open, she met his gaze.
Desire flashed in the depths of his eyes. “I want you to know who’s making love to you,” he said as he notched himself at her entrance, then slowly, deliberately thrust in deep.
Her eyes opened wider as he took her completely, filling her up, both her body and her heart. Damn him, she thought, tears threatening. She didn’t want to cry at how good they were together. She couldn’t do that and leave.
But she was going to leave him. She had to figure things out alone.
“Stop thinking.” Arms braced on either side of her shoulders, he raised his hips, and she shuddered, aware of every inch of his velvety length as he pulled out of her, then shoved back in. “Feel us, Sierra.”
She couldn’t do anything but feel as he thrust in and out, over and over. But before she could even start to build toward a climax, he stopped and pushed himself to a sitting position, taking him with her.
“What are you doing?”
“Making you feel.”
And then they were rocking together, face to face, eye to eye as he hit her clit with every roll of his hips against hers. It was sweet and emotional, the waves building as he made love to her, slowly and deliberately taking them both up and over.
And when she came, his hands were in her hair, pulling her into him, sealing his lips over hers as the pulsing of his erection and the low, satisfied groan told her he came, too.
They came together.
* * * *
The ride home was silent. Ryder left Sierra alone with her thoughts, knowing his words had already come from the heart and his actions had left her with no lingering doubt about how he felt. He loved her. He wanted to spend the rest of his life with her.
But she’d made her feelings clear, too. She needed time. So they had packed their wedding clothes and extra resort wear, pulling things together and using extra laundry bags from the hotel to put their resort clothing in. He’d tossed everything into the trunk and off they went.
He drove her to the apartment building where she and her brothers resided. The place itself was owned by Knight Time Technology and all the siblings lived in separate apartments in the building. Sebastian with his wife, Ashley, Ethan, alone now that Mandy was gone, and Parker.
Sierra, he knew, had packed her things to officially move in with Jason after they returned from their honeymoon. She was going home to big boxes and everything unsettled.
He hated it.
He wanted to be there to make things easier for her, but she’d insisted that she was going home alone. That they weren’t returning as a couple.
Fine.
He could accept what she wanted for now, but that didn’t mean he was leaving her to deal with the shit storm he’d caused and she’d left behind.
For tonight, he walked her up to her door, making sure she got home safely, and kissed her good night—a long, lingering, sizzling kiss that hopefully would keep her tossing and turning all night long.
Then he went home alone to think.
And to plan.
* * * *
Sierra stared at the taped-up boxes that filled her living room and wanted to cry at the sight. When she’d packed them up, she’d been excited to start her new life. Now she had to undo it all.
Sunlight streamed through the window in the living room, casting a glow directly on the wrapped packages, the gifts from the wedding. Her stomach churned at the sight. Obviously her brothers had decided this was the best place to leave them. Somehow she’d have to return them all. Make sure everyone who’d given her a gift got a refund.
She ran a hand over her eyes, wishing she had her Keurig, but that was packed in a box, along with her coffee pods, sugar, and cups. What she needed was a Starbucks run before tackling anything here, including letting her brothers know she was home.
She grabbed her purse and started for the door when she heard a knock. Oh, no. Ryder must have spoken to Sebastian already, and instead of going to work, he was here to…
What? Lecture her? Hug her?
She swung the door open wide, speaking as she did. “Sebastian, I was going to call— Ryder. What are you doing here?”
He stood at her door wearing a pair of aviator glasses that looked sexy on his face, a backwards ball cap that reminded her of their day on the lake at the Poconos, and food. But she hadn’t expected to see him again… well, not until she was ready.
“I come bearing sustenance.” He held out a Starbucks bag. “Venti vanilla latte with three extra pumps of syrup and a pumpkin loaf.” He dangled the bag as a peace offering.
She narrowed her gaze. “How do you know my order?” Or at least the order she would use on a day she was feeling particularly down.
He shrugged. “I asked your brother.”
So he had spoken to Sebastian, which meant she was going to have company times three… four if you counted Ashley, very soon. She hadn’t even called her own friends yet, unsure of how to explain what she’d done. It was going to be easier to rationalize why Ryder had interrupted the ceremony than why she’d left with him, she thought, cheeks burning.
Ryder cleared his throat. “Can I come in?”
She stepped aside so he could enter and shut the door behind him, accepting the coffee and bag with the treat. She stepped toward the kitchen and put everything down on the counter.
She turned, realizing he’d followed closely behind. He looked better than she did, his faded jeans and black shirt giving him a sexy appearance, while she wore a clean pair of sweats from the Poconos resort and a T-shirt with a logo on it.
She needed to find the boxes with her clothing. “Why are you here?” she asked again.
“Because you have a lot to do and I want to help you do it.” He spread one arm, gesturing to the other room, where the boxes were piled. “After all, it’s my fault.” He had the good grace to look embarrassed.
She blew out a breath, knowing his coming here was a sweet, thoughtful gesture. “But didn’t I say I needed time?” she asked, trying to be gentle but knowing she had to stand firm.
He folded his arms across his chest, his muscles showing beneath his T-shirt. “I didn’t say I was going to kiss you. Or fuck you. Or make slow, passionate love to you—although that’s all on the table if you just give me the okay.”
Now her cheeks were flaming, she thought, as she spun away. “If you want to help me, then thank you.” She wasn’t going to look a gift horse in the mouth. Besides, he was right. It was his fault she was in this situation. “All my furniture is still here. I need to cancel the movers for next week,” she muttered. “But we can open boxes and start putting things away… Oh, damn.”
“What’s wrong?” he asked.
“The scissors are packed. I have no way to open the boxes.”
He frowned. “Tell you what. I’ll run to the store and buy scissors so we can get started. You make whatever phone calls you need to make.”
“I don’t have my phone yet.”
Ryder lifted his cap
and reset it on his head. “Sebastian said he’d come down this morning, so I’m guessing he’ll bring it.”
Her eyes opened wide. “Can you be gone when he shows up? It’s going to be hard enough to talk to him without you here!”
He shook his head. “I’ll go get the scissors. But get used to having me around helping you. That’s nonnegotiable,” he said, and with a grin, he turned and walked out, leaving her flustered, flabbergasted, and pissed.
She didn’t need his help. He’d caused this mess! But it really was nice of him to acknowledge it and want to fix it. Because he has an agenda! He wants you and this is his way of getting an in!
She really needed to stop arguing with herself, she mused, as the doorbell rang.
“Sebastian.” This time when she opened the door, it was to her brother.
Times three.
Chapter Five
No sooner had Sierra opened the door than her brothers barged in, one right after the other without waiting to be asked or even saying hello to her first.
“Come in, why don’t you,” she muttered to herself.
“Jesus Christ, Sierra. I was so fucking worried about you,” Ethan said, pulling her into his arms, and her brief flare of frustration with him eased.
She wrapped her arms around his waist and laid her head on his chest as she had many times when she was a little girl and things in her life had gone wrong. He’d always been there for her and she knew he always would be. They all would. For all their overprotective ways, they were wonderful big brothers and she loved them.
“I’m fine,” she assured him. Taking a step back, she spun around, a forced smile on her face. “See?”
Sebastian shook his head at her antics.
“You gave us a scare when we came into the room and you were gone,” Parker said. “With Ryder.”
“He didn’t kidnap me,” she said, defending Ryder. “I went willingly. And I checked in. I let Sebastian know I was okay.”
“Doesn’t mean we didn’t worry,” Sebastian said, holding out her phone, and she took it gratefully.
“Don’t you three have to be at work?” she asked, taking in their dress. They all wore suits meant for the office. Now that they saw she was fine, maybe they’d go without forcing her to talk about things.
Ethan scowled. “Now listen to me, young lady,” he said in the tone he’d used when she was a naughty teenager. “Do you really think you’re getting off that easy?”
She rolled her eyes, but before she could say anything, Sebastian did. “Lay off, Ethan. She’s an adult. She can make her own decisions.”
She blew out a relieved breath, glad she had at least one brother on her side. Parker, as usual, said nothing, just watched carefully as things went on around him. Neutral, hence his nickname in the family, Switzerland, she mused. Which also came from his past as an almost-Olympic skier before a career-ending injury prevented him from fulfilling his dream.
“Now tell us what decisions you’ve made.” Sebastian folded his arms across his chest and pinned her with his steady gaze.
“Seriously?” She’d thought he understood her best in this situation, that he was going to give her space. Apparently not. “Listen, guys. I love you and I know you love me. But I didn’t walk into that church planning to run away with Ryder. I don’t know what I want! Or what I’m even ready for now.”
Their gazes softened.
“Do you love him?” Ethan asked. There was no question he was talking about Ryder and not her former groom.
She blew out a long breath, then strode to the window and looked out over Manhattan. With the crowded buildings and the people down below rushing along the sidewalks, it was such a big difference from the wide-open spaces and trees in the Poconos.
Did she love Ryder?
There were different kinds of love, she knew now. She’d loved being with Jason. She enjoyed his company, they had wanted the same things out of life, and she knew he’d give her the family of her own that she wanted.
But Ryder filled her soul. It might be a cheesy movie phrase but he completed her. He was her other half, and she didn’t need to dig deep to explain to herself why. It was a fact of life, like breathing.
“I love him,” she admitted, saying the words out loud for the first time in forever.
Parker came up behind her and wrapped an arm around her. “Trust yourself,” he said, kissing her on the cheek.
“I do. But can I trust him again?” she asked quietly.
Could she believe in Ryder to give her the security she desperately needed? Could she trust him not to get something crazy into his head and make a decision for her that would leave her gutted again?
“You’re adults now,” Sebastian said. “I told him not to go there with you if he wasn’t all in. So for what it’s worth, I trust him.”
She swallowed the lump in her throat.
“Let me put it to you this way.” She turned at the sound of Ethan’s voice. “If I were walking you down the aisle to Ryder, I wouldn’t stop and ask if you were sure. And I wouldn’t worry deep down that you weren’t getting every last thing you needed from the man you loved.”
Parker stepped forward, taking her hand. “I agree with them, sis. He’s a good guy. And it’s clear as hell he loves you.”
She looked at Sebastian, Ryder’s best friend. He knew him better than anyone here.
Her youngest brother nodded his head. “He’ll do right by you this time. I know he was trying to do right by you last time… and so was I. I’m sorry I didn’t tell you I knew why he ended things. We both thought we knew what was best, and we should have let you make your own decision about what you wanted in life.”
She blinked and a tear ran down her face.
“Ryder learned his lesson,” he said in a gruff voice. “He loves you and he won’t leave you again.”
For some reason, hearing it from her brother was something she’d desperately needed. Ryder might have promised the same things, but Sebastian’s trust in him took care of the final worry she had.
Was it crazy to contemplate jumping from almost marrying one man straight into the arms of another? Completely insane, she thought. But how could she risk losing him again for the sake of taking time she didn’t need?
“I love you guys,” she said to her brothers. “And I’m sorry I made you worry.”
“Love you, too,” they all muttered in their rough, brotherly way.
“What are you going to do?” Ethan asked.
She ran her tongue over her dry lips. “Well, I’m going to find the box marked clothing and dig out something normal to wear.” She glanced down at the red Paradise Cove sweats she had on. “And then I’m going to go see Jason, talk to him, and return his bracelet.”
She had the bracelet sitting on her nightstand. She’d unpacked it first thing, not wanting to misplace it.
“Want me to go with you?” Sebastian offered.
“Any of us?” Ethan asked.
Parker just nodded his agreement.
“No.” She rubbed her hands together nervously. “I have to face this on my own. Jason stormed out without talking to me. Is that love? Was he having second thoughts of his own and Ryder just gave him an excuse to walk away?” She gave voice to the questions that she hadn’t let herself deal with during her weekend away. “Or was he just embarrassed by the fact that I did turn around to look at Ryder instead of staring at my groom?”
Ethan met her gaze, a warm smile lifting his lips. “When did you grow up on me?” he asked with a chuckle.
Given everything going on in his life lately, she liked hearing the slightest laugh from him.
“I don’t know when, but I’m certain it’s thanks to you that I’m able to handle this. All of you. You’ve always been there for me. But now it’s time for me to stand on my own two feet.”
And that meant facing the man she had been supposed to marry.
* * * *
Sierra approached Jason’s secretary, a woman she not only k
new well but who had been at their aborted wedding. Hoping her cheeks weren’t as red as they felt, she stopped at the desk.
They’d agreed she’d come to see him at the office. She wondered if it was because he had work to do or because it was less personal to have this conversation here.
“Hi, Claire.”
“Sierra. Hi,” the other woman said softly, no judgment in her expression. “Mr. Armstrong is expecting you. You can go right in.”
Nerves fluttered again in her belly. “Thank you.” She stepped around the desk and approached his door. She knocked once and stepped in at the “Come in” she’d received in response.
Jason sat at his desk, standing as she entered the room. He did well and his office décor reflected as much, with a large mahogany desk, a plush leather chair with wood-grain accents, and large paintings of the ocean on the wall beside his diplomas.
“Hi.” She clutched her purse tightly in her hand.
“Hi.”
Awkwardness surrounded them, so she forced herself to step forward and sit in one of the client chairs across from his desk. Taking her cue, he strode around the desk and seated himself in the chair beside her.
She took in the lines around his bloodshot eyes. “You look tired.”
“Didn’t sleep much this weekend.”
She managed a nod, her throat too full to speak.
“I did a lot of thinking,” he said.
“Me, too.”
He raised an eyebrow at that and she blushed, glancing away. She didn’t want to discuss her time with Ryder with her ex.
“Look, I just want you to know, I had no way of knowing Ryder was going to interrupt the wedding that way.”
He cleared his throat. “I don’t blame you for that.”
But he obviously blamed her for other things, she thought. And maybe rightly so. “I’m sorry I looked at Ryder when I went down the aisle. I didn’t mean to. I was taking in everyone and my gaze landed on him.”
“And when the preacher asked if anyone objected? Are you sorry for turning to him then?”
Take the Bride: A Knight Brothers Novella Page 7