by Mia Madison
“Everything’s fine. Shall we?”
I nodded and he smiled, but it didn’t reach his eyes. I opened the door to his apartment for him and hesitated in the doorway instead of following him inside. A bad feeling started to form in the pit of my stomach as I glanced back at the table where his phone remained.
“You coming, love?”
“Yeah.”
I closed the door, hoping the mystery would reveal itself sooner rather than later.
11
Landon returned to his usual self by the next day and I put the mystery of his weird mood out of my mind. The days continued to fly by and more of my clothes worked their way into his closet—half of which he had emptied for me.
I had unofficially moved in. When I told Landon how I felt, he only smiled and shrugged a shoulder, not at all put off by the idea. We definitely moved into more serious territory in our relationship.
I couldn’t say that I minded. For the first time in a long time, the loneliness had subsided and I was truly happy. If I was honest with myself, I was on the verge of falling head over heels for him. Sometimes, when he looked at me, I swore he felt the same way.
Overall, life was good.
Work was good as well. On Saturday, exactly three weeks before his show, we stood together in his studio and took stock of his completed works. Landon’s arms were folded over his chest as he nodded to himself while I waited patiently for a verdict.
He gave it away with his ecstatic smile. Without saying a word, he bent down and lifted me into the air, spinning me around in a circle as he hugged the ever-loving crap out of me.
“You are the greatest muse a man could hope for,” he said against my neck. “Thank you, thank you, thank you.”
“Stop. I didn’t do this, you did.”
“Thanks to you. Seriously, Harmony. I wouldn’t have gotten this much done without you. I’ll be forever in your debt.”
His words touched my heart until the unfortunate reminder of something that had been making me uncomfortable since we started sleeping together. He sensed the change in my demeanor and placed me back on my feet.
“Did I say something wrong?”
“Not… exactly. I just… There’s something I think we need to talk about.” He nodded for me to continue and I sighed. “I can’t keep working for you. I just can’t.”
“What? Why not?”
“It’s… I feel kind of like a…” I trailed off, begging him with my eyes to catch my drift, but the meaning was lost on him. I rolled my eyes and blurted, “I feel like a paid girlfriend!”
His eyes widened and his head reared back in alarm. I watched the gears turning as he processed it and understanding dawned in his eyes.
“So you don’t want to leave me?”
“Of course not. I just can’t keep accepting money for this. All I do during the ‘work day’ is hang around and eat your food and occasionally blow you. It feels wrong in a lot of ways.”
Landon nodded slowly as a frown formed between his eyebrows.
“How will you pay for your apartment?”
“I put in another round of applications over the past week. I’m sorry I didn’t tell you, but—”
“No!” he shouted, placing his hands on my shoulders and staring down at me with a wild look. “I can’t lose you, love. Not this close to the show.”
“You’re not losing me, I’d just be—”
“Move in with me. Officially, I mean. I won’t pay you and you won’t have bills to worry about.”
“What? You can’t be serious!”
“Why wouldn’t I be? You practically live here already and I’ve never been happier in my entire life. Live with me. Work if you must, but be here with me the rest of the time.”
His offer was genuine and my heart was leaping in my chest at the opportunity. My brain, however, was still skeptical.
“Do you really want to live with me? You aren’t just making this offer out of desperation?”
“I’ve been considering when to ask you for the past few days. It’s the next logical step for us.”
“Is it?” I asked quietly, watching him frown in response.
This time, he caught on quickly and the tender smile I loved appeared.
“You’re right. There is one step in front of it. We’ll take that one first, if you’d like.”
My heart thudded hard in my chest when he stepped closer and cupped the back of my neck.
Now? He wanted to take the next step now? Was he there already?
God, I was beyond excited to find out.
Just as his lips parted, there was a loud bang on the door of the studio that led into the hallway. We both frowned and wandered over to the door to listen. Landon pushed me behind him when the knob started to rattle.
“Go back to the other room,” he whispered. “Wait for me to—”
“God fucking damn it! Open this goddamn door, Landon!” The woman on the other side of the door banged on the wood and screamed, “I’m not leaving until you open this fucking door!”
He froze and looked at me. I raised an eyebrow and dryly asked, “Your mother?”
“My mother is far more vulgar than that,” he said with a nervous chuckle. “Love, would you wait for me in the apartment?”
“Why?”
“I—”
“I can hear you talking, you piece of shit!”
“Damn it,” he muttered. “Just… please wait in the apartment.”
Oh, hell no.
I stood my ground, folding my arms across my chest as he unlocked the front door to reveal a stunning, pissed-off woman.
“You changed the locks?” she hissed as she whipped a set of keys at him. “You’re such a fucking asshole!”
Before he could reply, she stormed inside and jerked off her coat. It was halfway down her arms when she spotted me and froze.
“Who the hell is she?”
Landon shot me a pleading look. It only strengthened my resolve to stay.
“I’m Harmony,” I answered since he obviously had no intention of doing it. “I’m Landon’s girlfriend.”
I was hoping it would piss her off, but all she did was gape at me for a brief moment before she started laughing like hell. It took all my strength to stay standing after the heavy blow to my pride.
“Enjoy it while it lasts, honey. It never does with him.”
She breezed past me like I wasn’t even there. To my horror, Landon followed her into the main room of his studio.
“What the fuck are you doing here, Beth?”
“I tried calling,” she said as she flipped her blonde hair over her shoulder and began scanning his paintings. “If you had answered or called me back, I wouldn’t have had to show up like this.”
I wasn’t insecure about my appearance in the least, but damn it if something about this woman wasn’t setting me on edge and making me feel like a scrub. She was at least a decade older than me, but she wore it well. Her makeup was light, hair perfectly done, her clothes looked like they were made for her body. She was well put together.
I was wearing jeans and an old tank top. I didn’t even compare.
Somewhere in the back of my mind, I knew the real reason why she was making me feel this way. It was clear to me as soon as Landon opened the door.
“Since he apparently lost his manners at some point in the past few years, I guess I’ll introduce myself. I’m Elizabeth—Landon’s ex-girlfriend.”
Suspicion confirmed. Another successful hit to the pride landed. One more and she’s done for, ladies and gentleman! Who’s ready for a killing blow?
“We dated a long time ago,” Landon finally interjected with an apologetic look. “It’s ancient history.”
“Correction: we dated on and off a long time ago. After every failed attempt at a relationship, he comes back to me.” She looked me up and down with a cruel smile. “After all, I am his muse.”
Game over. Here lies Harmony, the girl who puts her trust in the wrong men aga
in and again.
I looked at Landon for confirmation. His lips were set in a fine line and he was staring at Beth with a murderous look.
“You lied to me.”
He looked back at me with yet another pleading look as he hurriedly said, “I didn’t, love. Please believe me. I—”
“You lied to me after you said point-blank that you wouldn’t. Why? Why couldn’t you just keep your promise?” I shook my head to myself, trying and failing to understand the logic behind it. Meanwhile, my heart was starting to crack in my chest. “I’m not doing this. Not again. Fuck this.”
The bitch made some sort of snide comment that I pointedly ignored and Landon called after me as I stormed out. I didn’t even bother going to the apartment to get anything. My coat and purse were thankfully still hanging in the studio, so I grabbed those and left without looking back.
Landon didn’t follow.
12
When I got in the cab, I absentmindedly called out the address to my apartment. After a few minutes of riding and watching the city pass me by, I realized what a terrible idea it was to go home.
I didn’t want to see Landon until I could calm my thoughts and it wouldn’t be the first time he randomly showed up at my apartment. There was only one alternative. I gave the cab driver the new address and sat back to wait.
He wouldn’t follow me to my parent’s house. No fucking way. The man had some balls, but he wasn’t suicidal.
There was one huge downside of choosing to hide out at my parent’s place. Saturday was the one day a week where I could count on both my parents being home. They rarely ever deviated from their lazy Saturday routine. Dad answered the door, proving me right.
“Hey,” I said weakly, forcing a smile when he frowned. “Can I come in?”
“What’s wrong?”
“Nothing. I just… wanted to drop by.”
“Bullshit,” he muttered as he opened the door wider. “Come in. Your mother’s having a late breakfast. You hungry?”
“Starving.”
I stepped past him and headed for the kitchen, feeling relieved when at least my mother smiled at me. But it didn’t take long for it to falter and turn into an outright frown when Dad came in behind me.
“What’s going on?”
“Can’t a girl drop by to see her parents without getting the third degree? Jesus.”
“The look on your face says something’s wrong,” Dad commented dryly. “Spare us the hours of guessing and just spit it out. You need money?”
“No,” I said with a sigh.
One day, I swore I would get to a position where they didn’t assume my every visit meant I needed some sort of help. One day.
“Are you still working for Landon?” Mom asked without looking up from her plate. “How’s that going? Is he treating you well?”
The tone of her voice gave away a lot more than her words did. She knew—or at the very least suspected. When she finally looked up at me, her face was a picture of raw sadness. Real sadness on my behalf.
It was so rare to see her real emotions that it amplified mine tenfold. My bottom lip began to tremble as I tried to ignore the stinging behind my eyes.
“Harmony.”
The soft whisper broke me. I covered my face with my hands in a vain attempt to hide my reaction, but it was too late. Mom moved around the table to sit beside me and Dad rushed over to see what all the fuss was about.
“What the hell? What did he do to you?!” he demanded the instant he saw my tears.
There was no way I could pull off pretending that nothing was wrong. My only options were to fabricate something to appease them or tell them the truth.
“We started dating!” I blurted out, too tired to even think about lying. “W-We started dating and… and his ex-girlfriend showed up today and…”
“You were dating Landon Connors and you didn’t tell us?!” Dad shouted, his eyes wide and wild. The hysterical look only lasted a moment before turning into something vicious. “What the fuck did he do to you?”
“H-He just… He made me swear! He made me promise to be honest with him from the first day and then he turned around and lied to my face! I-I can’t deal with more fucking liars! I’m sick of it!”
I didn’t look up, but I could practically feel my Dad’s confused expression. Mom stood up and whispered something before more or less pushing him out of the room. I heard him mutter something about ‘artist motherfuckers’ before his footsteps trailed down the hall.
Mom sat back down and touched my cheek. Once she had my attention, she lifted my head up by the chin, forcing me to look at her.
“Talk to me.”
“I don’t know what else to say. I just can’t deal with this. He lied about her—who’s to say he isn’t lying about other things? I thought… I thought we were real. Now, I’m not so sure. The worst part is I have no way of knowing.”
“You could ask him.”
“And blindly put my trust in his answer? No, thanks. Not again. That’s how the whole thing with Mark got so fucked.”
“Unless you plan to spend the rest of your life alone, it’s a risk you’re going to have to take, sweetheart.”
“You can’t be serious,” I said as I gaped at her. “I thought you’d shit a brick when you found out I was dating another artist. Not to mention how much older he is.”
“You’re twenty-five. I think you’re old enough to decide who to date. I was a year younger than you when I married your father.”
“But Dad’s only five years older than you.”
“How old is Landon? Late thirties?”
“Forty-one.”
Mom rolled her eyes and waved a hand dismissively. “Close enough. If he was in his fifties or older—you’d hear it. From me and your father.”
“Where is he, by the way?”
“I sent him away so we could talk. He’s never been very helpful in these situations. Remember junior prom?”
“Oh, God. Don’t remind me.”
We laughed and I realized my awful mood had lessened considerably. Mom stood to pour me a glass of orange juice and it almost felt like how it was before everything went down with Mark. Before I broke their trust in me.
“Mom?”
“Hmm?”
“Will you and Dad ever forgive me for what happened?”
“I already have.”
“And Dad?”
“He’s stubborn. He’s also extremely worried about you. Cutting you off entirely was a bit harsh in my opinion, but your father believed it would teach you how to provide for yourself—something you never had a chance to learn growing up.”
“I never thought about it like that,” I said as I accepted the juice and took a sip. “I just thought you were mad at me.”
“We were. It wore off fast. It always does with the people we love,” she said pointedly, cocking an eyebrow as she watched my expression.
“I don’t know if I can trust him.”
Mom shrugged and blew out a heavy breath.
“You just have to follow your gut. But do yourself a favor and leave Mark in the past where he belongs. Don’t bring any part of him into your decision. It’s not fair to you or to Landon.”
“I’ll try,” I promised.
Surprisingly, I meant it. After our little pep talk, I was ready to face my demons and shove Mark back where he belonged—buried deep inside below my other, more pleasant memories.
Because seriously—fuck Mark. And fuck Beth. Fuck all ex-partners and all the ways they fuck up our current relationships. Fuck them all.
It was amazing how much better an internal monologue of cursing could make me feel. Between our conversation and releasing my rage in my head, I felt five times lighter than when I arrived. I started helping myself to the food scattered around the table and Mom headed back behind the bar, returning a moment later with a full glass of Mimosa.
We sat together in comfortable silence, at least until her glass was drained. I was halfway throug
h my eggs when she spoke.
“You know, I dated an older man before I met your father. Well, dating is a bit of a stretch. We were really just casual lovers.”
I stopped mid-chew and sat my fork down, willing myself to finish the bite and swallow it down before the bile rose.
“He was a college football coach. Wrestling, too, if I recall correctly. He was built like a brick house.”
I swallowed hard, almost choking on the bite. After washing it down with a sip of orange juice, I begged, “Please stop talking.”
“Seriously, Harmony. I don’t think there was a single place on his body that you couldn’t bounce a quarter off of. Not. One. That man was hard everywhere.”
“Is brain bleach a thing? Because I really need some.”
Mom ignored me, sighing wistfully as she relaxed back in her chair. I shoved my plate away, my appetite lost.
“Boundaries, Mom. This isn’t breakfast with the girls—I’m your daughter.”
She shrugged, completely unapologetic. Her lips parted to say something—abruptly snapping closed as her eyes darted to the side. She rolled her eyes and shook her head.
“Being right isn’t always a good thing.”
“What?”
“Your father really does suck with these things.”
I followed her gaze to the doorway. My father was standing off to the side with his hands on his hips and Landon was lingering in the doorway with a heartbreaking expression of guilt.
“Harmony. I think you should give him a chance to explain himself before condemning him,” Dad said with the authoritative tone he took at work.
“W-What? How did—”
“I called him.”
Oh, you’ve got to be shitting me.
“I didn’t lie to you. At least not in the way you think I did,” Landon interjected, casting a look to my father that could only mean ‘please shut up.’
“I don’t understand.”
“I’d like to change that. Give me a chance?”
He outstretched a hand and every part of my body ached to take it. I glanced at Mom, who was nodding her head in a glaringly obvious move. Dad looked impatient for me to accept. I guess he didn’t care about the age difference either.