And that's what's made methink sometimes lately that it would be better if I died."
"But, Jerry," Charlotte repeated; she spoke very quietly, for she wasdreadfully afraid of beginning to cry; "you don't need to feel that now._Now_ you can try to take advantage of all your chances for gettingwell without any worry to spoil it."
"Yes; that's what I'm so thankful for. Oh, I am so thankful!" he saidfervently. "And, Charlotte," he added very gravely, "there's anotherthing I'm glad of, very glad of--the poor ghost will be able to restnow."
Charlotte jumped up and clapped her hands. In her state of suppressedexcitement one mood rapidly followed another, and it was better to laughthan to cry! But Jerry did not join in her merriment.
"Don't, Charlotte," he said, "I'm not joking. I've thought of himlately in the middle of the night when I couldn't sleep, and I have feltso sorry for him. So sorry that if I had heard him again I would havespoken to him, I am sure. Can you fancy anything more terrible than tohave to wander about,--never resting, with no home, and no power ofdoing any good, or undoing any harm,--for years and years and years? Ithink it's quite as dreadful a punishment as any one could imagine, andI think, perhaps, if people believed in that kind of ghosts a little, itwouldn't do them _any_ harm."
"But, supposing it's true even," said Charlotte, "the poor old thing'sat rest now."
"Yes, I think so; I do hope he'll be able to be at peace. For, afterall, he _has_ tried to tell how sorry he was, and to put things right,"said Jerry, with a sigh of relief.
He was weak and tired all that day, but it was scarcely, perhaps, to bewondered at. And the night following he slept soundly, and awokerefreshed; and when Dr Lewis saw him he expressed his conviction thatthe boy would be quite able to stand the journey in a week's time. Andit was with one anxiety the less on his overburdened professionalshoulders that the good doctor left the Waldrons' house that morning.
"It will save the boy, there is no doubt of it," he said to himself."And I know no one more deserving of good fortune than Waldron," forJerry's father had thought it right to take his old friend to someextent into his confidence. "Dear me!--to think that _he_ should be thenext in the Silverthorns succession! I knew there was some connection,but I thought it a much more remote one."
Surprises seemed to be the order of the day at Norfolk Terrace. Someday within the week, during which, preparations for Jerry's journey wenton busily, came a letter with a foreign post-mark, addressed toCharlotte. She started a little when she saw the writing.
"From Claudia Meredon," she half whispered to herself; "she must bewriting about Jerry, I suppose."
But when she drew out the letter she saw that it was rather a long one."The boys" were all about, and Charlotte knew that quiet was not to beexpected in such circumstances. So she took the letter off to her ownroom to read in peace. The first few words surprised her.
"My dear Charlotte," it began,--whereas hitherto Claudia's one or twolittle notes had been formally addressed to "Dear Miss Waldron,"--"AuntMildred tells me I may call you by your first name as she says we musteach think of the other as a sort of cousin now, so I hope you will notmind it. I have been longing to tell you how happy I was to hear allthat has come to pass. It is, of course, very sad for General Osbertand his family, but they have never really seemed like relations to AuntMildred, and I do not think they have ever cared much about dearSilverthorns. It is delightful to think that it is going to be yourfather's some day, and indeed it will seem like his almost at once, asAunt Mildred is longing for him to take charge of things. I do so wantto see you. I want to explain to you many things that I have never beenable to tell. I know you must have thought me strange and unfriendly,and I want you to know how difficult it was. Aunt Mildred will not mindmy telling you everything now. She wants us to be friends, and thisbrings me to what I want especially to write about."
And then followed a proposal which made Charlotte's face flush withpleasure, and her eyes beam.
"Oh, how delightful it would be," she whispered. "Oh, will papa andmamma let me?"
And scarcely waiting to finish the letter she flew to her mother in sucha state of breathless excitement that Mrs Waldron scarcely recognisedher quiet self-contained little daughter.
"It is very, very kind," she said, when she had read what Charlotteeagerly pointed out.
"And may I go? Do you think papa would let me?" she exclaimed. "Oh,mamma, I would work so hard at French and music. You see Claudia says Icould join in her lessons."
"We must wait till your father comes home," said Mrs Waldron. "But Ishould like it for you very much indeed."
Mr Waldron had had a letter too--from Lady Mildred herself. She wroteearnestly begging her newly acknowledged cousin to bring his daughter,as well as Jerry, for a two or three months' visit to her at Cannes.
"I beg you not to let the expense be any difficulty," she said. "Thereare long arrears due to you which I can, alas, only indirectly make up.And I am most anxious, peculiarly so, that my dear little niece, ClaudiaMeredon, should make friends with your children. She will be speakingof this plan in more detail in her letter to your daughter."
So it was decided, and a few days later Mr Waldron, accompanied by histwo children, started for Cannes.
Jerry bore the journey fairly well, but he was very exhausted beforethey got to its end, and his father was thankful that Charlotte was withthem. Some little time of anxiety about him followed, and he requiredmuch care and nursing to bring him round, though the doctor assured themthat there was no serious cause for alarm and much for congratulationthat the move southwards had not been delayed.
"I doubt if he would have stood it a few weeks hence," said he. "He wasevidently losing instead of gaining strength every day in England. Butyou will see a great change in a little while."
And in the mean time Jerry's illness had one good effect. It drew thetwo girls together as nothing else could have done, and made theWaldrons feel more quickly and thoroughly at home with Lady Mildred thanwould otherwise have been the case. For her real kindness of heart cameto the front at such times, and all her stiffness and "frighteningness"vanished.
One day--one lovely day, when it was difficult to believe it was onlyFebruary, and that up there in the north in poor, grey old England, therain and the fogs, or the snow, perhaps, were having it all their ownway--a little group was enjoying the sunshine on one of the pleasantterrace walks above the sea. There was Jerry in an invalid-chair still,but looking as if he would soon be independent of anything of the kind,and beside him his two constant girl-attendants. Suddenly one of themstarted forward.
"Claudia," she said, "I see papa; he is coming our way. Would you mindmy running to meet him? I do so want to talk to him a little. He willso soon be going now, and I have scarcely seen him alone for so manydays."
"Of course," Claudia replied. "Jerry and I will be perfectly happy.Don't hurry, Charlotte."
And in another minute Charlotte was beside her father, her two handsclasped on his arm.
"Well, my gipsy?" he said.
"Oh, papa, I have so much to say to you, and you are going so soon," shereplied.
"And I have been so busy since Jerry got better that my little girl isbeginning to think I am forgetting her--is that your new trouble?Remember, I never agreed with you in the old days, when it seemed to youthat if a good many `ifs' were realised, there would be no such thing asa trouble left."
"Papa," said Charlotte reproachfully; "I'm not making troubles. I'mnever going to do so--it would be _too_ ungrateful. I suppose, as yousay so, they must come some time or other, but just now, with Jerrybetter and all, it's difficult to think of them. _You_ haven't any,have you, dear papa?"
"No, my dear; I have so much good to be grateful for, that, as you say,it is difficult to think of anything but sunshine. Everything is goingon satisfactorily."
"You have seen General Osbert again, papa, since the poor son's death?"asked Charlotte; for the younger Mr Osbert had died a few days
afterthe Waldrons arrived.
"Yes, poor old man; he and Lady Mildred are quite at one abouteverything, and of course I am only too glad to carry out her wishes.One thing I am glad of, and that is that I shall have plenty to do,Charlotte. I could not have endured a life of even comparativeidleness."
"Papa dear," Charlotte went on, "it is most of all about Claudia I wantto speak to you. I cannot tell you how I feel about her. Do you know,papa, I _could_ not have been like her if our places had been reversed?Just think, she is really as happy for us as if we were
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