“So, you’re concerned about your precious little Jennifer, are you?”
“I’m concerned about the company’s name being dragged through the mud by your ridiculous insistence on punishing Angus Stewart for what happened with your brother. Not to mention how you blackmailed your son into going along with it. I’m not stupid, Zach. D never wanted to be involved, but you made him. You told him you’d slit James, Jen and Fi’s throats if he didn’t.”
He shook his head and his smile widened. I knew far too much about Zach’s disgusting behaviour. Probably more than Dante had revealed to his siblings. He wanted to spare them a whole lot of pain and I couldn’t blame him. The things their father had done were downright depraved.
“You can tell yourself that, but I know you’ve been in love with my daughter for a long time, haven’t you? As for Dante, he wanted the Stewart girl when he saw her. So don’t tell me he wasn’t complicit.”
Honestly, it shouldn’t come as a surprise to me he knew about my feelings towards Jen, but it did. Why had he never brought it up before? Did he even care I’d wanted his daughter since she was fifteen years old? Probably not considering what he’d done to her.
“It doesn’t matter. I’m trying to protect all of them and your precious company.”
He eyed me for the longest time before he spoke.
“What did you bring me?”
I sighed and reached into my coat pocket, bringing out the photograph I’d printed earlier.
“Are you going to help me with this situation?”
“That entirely depends on what you have there.”
His eyes focused on the photo in my hand. I laid it out on the table and pushed it over to him. He reached out and picked it up, his eyes scanning every detail.
“Is this…?”
“Your grandson. He was born in the early hours of Sunday morning.”
“Does he have a name?”
His eyes softened a fraction, like seeing he had a grandson brought him joy. I felt sick. Giving Zach this insight into Dante’s life when he really didn’t deserve it. But I’d do anything to protect the Bensons even if it meant making a bargain with their father.
Jen would murder me for this. I knew if I told her, she’d be pissed. But I wasn’t going to lie to her either. She deserved the truth and well, if she ended things between us over this, then so be it. I knew I had to do this. The lengths I’d go to were immeasurable.
“Logan Reid Benson.”
“He looks just like Dante did when he was born.”
I said nothing. Whatever he was reminiscing about didn’t matter. Didn’t change who he was. A sick, disturbed individual with no morality.
“Thank you for this.”
Words I never thought I’d hear out of his mouth. I didn’t want his praise nor his thanks. I just wanted him to help me deal with Max and save Jen any further pain.
“Does Dante know about this boy’s plot to reveal his little secrets?”
“No.”
He looked up at me, dropping the photo down on the table.
“Then how do you know?”
“Jen told me.”
He raised an eyebrow.
“Has my daughter finally seen sense?”
I cocked my head to the side.
“What do you mean?”
He smiled, but it was cold and there was no emotion behind his eyes.
“Why, what’s been staring her in the face for twelve years.”
“And what’s that?”
“You. Not that you need or want my approval, but I’m giving it to you anyway.”
I stared at him for a long moment. What the actual fuck? Besides the fact I was kind of pissed off Zach had known I’d loved Jen all this time, I had absolutely no idea why he’d approve of us.
“You what?”
“I approve of you as my daughter’s future husband. I must say it was a joy to watch you two fight against your feelings.”
I had no fucking clue what to say. Nor did I think Jen would appreciate him saying it either. She didn’t want her father’s approval for anything. Also what was this about marriage? Jen and I had barely even started. Yes, she was the only person in this world I’d ever consider making that huge commitment to. I wanted marriage and kids with her, desperately, but not yet. We still had to get over the hurdle of telling everyone else in her family we were together before we even considered anything else.
“That’s neither here nor there. Are you going to help me?”
“Come see me again next week and I’ll have something for you.”
I raised an eyebrow. Just like that? I wondered what he wasn’t telling me. Who fucking knew.
“Really now?”
“You don’t trust me and that’s fine, but I assure you, I want to get to the bottom of this.” He sat back, settling his hands in his lap again. “Are you and my daughter together?”
“That’s really none of your business.”
“It is if you want me to help you.”
I sighed and looked away. I was already going to hell for showing him a photograph of Logan, might as well drown myself further. The conversation I’d have with Jen when she got home would probably have me hung, drawn and quartered.
“Yes, we are.”
“I’m pleased to hear it. May I keep this?” He pointed at the photograph. “He is my grandson after all, even if I’ll likely never meet him.”
“Yes.”
I’d planned on giving it to him, not that he’d earnt such a luxury. I was fucking dreading telling Dante about any of this. Whilst he trusted me to deal with issues such as these, I doubt he’d be impressed by me coming to his father for help. I’d suspected Zach was involved at first, but perhaps he wasn’t. I still wasn’t entirely sure if he was playing me or not even though I believed what he’d told me. This whole thing was so fucking complicated, but if it got Jen out of trouble, then it’d be worth it.
I stood up, deciding I’d had enough of his company for one day.
“Until next week.”
He gave me a slight nod of acknowledgment. I turned and left, wondering how the fuck I was going to tell Jen I’d gone to see her father.
***
Jen was in the living room watching TV by herself when I made my way upstairs after I’d got home a few hours ago.
“Where is everyone?” I asked as I took a seat next to her.
“Dante and Liora are upstairs napping whilst Logan is asleep. Apparently he kept them up all night and most of today. We need to sort out dinner because they haven’t had time.”
I’d dropped Angus and Heather off at the airport before I’d gone to the prison earlier as they had to get back. I’m sure Liora would’ve loved her mother to stay longer.
“We can order in pizza or something.”
She leant over to me, planting a kiss on my cheek.
“You must be a mind reader.”
“Why?”
“I’m craving cheese like nobody’s business.”
I shook my head and stroked her arm.
“I need to talk to you about something.”
It was better to come out and say it rather than beat around the bush. I might have originally told her I wouldn’t tell her what I had planned, but she deserved to know I’d involved her father. Not that she would thank me for it.
“Okay, what is it?”
“I went to see your father today.”
Her face fell and her eyes darkened.
“Why the fuck would you do that?”
I sighed and tried to reach for her but she flinched back. That hurt. Did she think I’d do this without reason?
“Jen…”
“No, why the hell would you go and see him?”
“I suspected he was involved in Max’s schemes.”
Her eyes got all misty and she curled in on herself.
“And is he?”
“No, I don’t think he is.”
&nbs
p; She turned away from me and grabbed a cushion, hugging it to her chest as she looked down at her lap.
“What happened?”
So I explained what I’d discussed with him regarding Max and what I’d had to give him in return for information. Her face grew redder and angrier by the minute. I mean, I knew she was going to be mad so this wasn’t exactly unexpected.
“You told him about Logan? What the fuck, Brent? How could you?”
“Getting your father to do anything without giving him something in return is impossible. You think Liora didn’t have to give something up to get him to plead guilty?”
She opened her mouth then shut it again, scowling at me.
“You still didn’t have to tell him about Logan. What’s Dante going to say? He didn’t want Dad to find out.”
“Don’t you think I know that? Do you really think I wanted to give him a picture of his grandson after everything he’s done? Trust me, I’m well aware of what D will say. He’s already going to kill me for this thing between us so don’t get me started on what he’ll do to me for this.”
“Then why’d you do it?”
“To keep you safe.” I reached out and she let me take her hands. “Don’t you know I’d do anything for you? Even if it means pissing off my best friend. Besides, I’m keeping him safe too although I doubt he’ll see it that way.”
Tears welled in her eyes and the sight of it fractured my heart.
“You kept telling me you wouldn’t put me above Dante.”
I know what I’d said, but that was before. Shit, I couldn’t imagine not taking care of Jen in all the ways she needed. To say I’d been an idiot was an understatement.
“Jen… you really have no idea, do you?”
“About what?” she sniffled.
“About how I feel about you. How I’ve always felt.”
Was I really going to do this now? Tell her the truth? How could I continue to keep it from her? She deserved to know how long I’d been in love with her. Hell, she deserved to know I loved her full stop.
“What do you mean?”
“Do you think this just happened overnight? That I suddenly changed my tune the night we first slept together?”
She stared at me for a long moment before she tugged her hands out of mine and got up, pacing away from me.
“Is Dad going to help you?”
What the fuck?
Why wasn’t she acknowledging what I just said about my feelings? Why the sudden change?
“Jen—”
“Answer the question.”
“Yes, I told you, he doesn’t want the company to go down in flames.”
She kept walking until she reached the windows. Placing a hand on the pane, she stared out of it.
“You remember the day we met?”
“I can’t forget it.”
The vivid memory seared into my retinas for life. I could never forget the way she looked at me nor how my heart raced in her presence.
“There’s so many things I remember about the two of us. The way you always used to try get me to talk to you. Even when I told you to fuck off, it didn’t stop you trying. You never stopped and I always wondered why. I’d ask myself what the hell you wanted with me when I made it clear I wasn’t interested in anything you had to offer me.”
She drummed her fingers against the window pane, reminding me of the way her father had drummed his fingers on the table of the visitation room earlier. The only thing Zach and Jen had in common were their looks and perhaps on occasion, certain gestures.
“It’s funny how all those memories become so much clearer now I understand what was behind your need to know me.”
“What do you mean?”
She turned around and stared at me, her blue eyes void of emotion.
“It makes sense now. All of it. Every moment we spent fighting something that would ultimately consume us both. That’s why we’re here now. Everyone around us already knew what we couldn’t see.” She shook her head and looked down at her feet. “Funny how you can’t fight something which is meant to be.”
I wasn’t sure I caught her meaning.
“What are you saying?”
“I’m saying I know, Brent. I know everything.”
Chapter Nineteen
Jennifer
I should be pissed off. So fucking pissed off he’d gone to see my father and told him about Max and Logan. He should never have gone. Dad was manipulative and could twist anyone around to his thinking. I wasn’t sure I could believe that Dad would actually help us out with the situation with Max. Then again, the one thing Dad loved as much as himself was Bensons. I couldn’t find it in me to be angry with Brent for going though. Not when I finally understood what he’d been trying to tell me all this time. I thought he’d just been scared of Dante finding out we were together, but it was more than that. So much more.
***
I wished he’d leave me alone. It made my determination to hate him that much harder. Why did he have to be so damn attractive? And nice. I didn’t want nice. I wanted to hate him in peace. Nothing I did made him back down. It was like he was determined to get to know me and I just resisted that pull between us. Resisted the attraction I felt for him. The attraction I kept denying was there.
“D was telling me you two are quite partial to ice cream. What do you say I take you to that gelato place they’ve just opened nearby? You and Fi can get whatever you want.”
I looked up at him. His stupid handsome face so eager to help me. I didn’t want his help even if Fi kept telling me he wasn’t so bad. If I accepted his help then I’d be giving in and I could never give in. It wouldn’t do me any good. I’d never have him in that way. In the way I wanted deep down. Not when he was twenty one and I’d just turned sixteen not too long ago. Dante had taken us all out to celebrate mine and Fi’s birthday at some fancy pants restaurant as a way for us all to get to know each other. He wanted us to treat Brent like one of the family. I don’t know why. He’d only been with us for a couple of months now, but already Dante, Fi and James had taken a shine to him. Me, on the other hand, I was reluctant to have anything to do with him because these feelings inside me wouldn’t go away. They wouldn’t die and it drove me insane.
“Go away, Brent,” I hissed.
“Come on, Jen, you need to get out of the house. You can’t stay locked up in here all day. Let me take you and Fi out, hmm?”
So what if I didn’t want to leave the house? I hated people. People sucked. None of them understood what I’d been through. Fi and I hadn’t been out much since it happened. How could I when the memories threatened to consume me?
“You’re not allowed to call me Jen.”
He smiled at me, which only made my hands ball into fists at my sides.
“Just come and get gelato. You don’t have to talk to me.”
I wanted gelato, but I didn’t want to go with him.
“Fi’s already agreed.”
Trust Fi to agree. She liked Brent, but me? I hated him. He made me feel things I shouldn’t. I couldn’t imagine a man touching me after what Dad did to me, but my body reacted to Brent’s presence in ways I hated.
“I don’t want to go.”
“I don’t believe you.”
Why’d he have to be so damn persistent? I didn’t understand it. And why on earth was he reaching out to me now? When his fingers brushed over my arm, I felt like my skin was on fire and the way his hazel eyes seared into mine had me scrambling for words.
“You like to keep all those walls up, Jen, but I can see you’re hurting,” he told me, his voice so soft. “Let me help you.”
I hated the way he said my name. Hated that it made my heart thump in my chest. God I hated him so much. So why did his touch affect me? I never wanted him to stop. I craved his touch.
His fingers continued to trail over my arm and it was like his eyes were trying to tell me something, but I couldn’t work out wh
at.
“I don’t want your help.”
“You do, you just don’t want to admit it.”
My breath caught in my throat as his hand closed over my forearm. The warmth of him seared into me.
“It’s just gelato.”
It wasn’t just gelato. Nothing with him was that simple. What the hell would it take to make him go away?
“Stop touching me,” I whispered, almost unable to get the words out.
He didn’t let go, rather just stared at me and it made my heart go crazy. What would it be like to have him touch me in other places? Would he make this better? Would he make my pain go away? The agony of what my father did to me never went away. It was this dull ache in my chest, tearing me to shreds.
“Jen…”
“Stop it.”
“Talk to me. What’s going on in that head of yours?”
I swear he was leaning closer to me. It was too much. All of it. I couldn’t deal with the emotions and feelings coursing through my body like wildfire. So I did something I’d come to regret my entire life even if I buried what happened this day deep down inside me and kept it from resurfacing for so long.
I ripped my arm away from him and backed away.
“Don’t touch me.”
He straightened and his face became stricken.
“I’m sorry, I—”
“Don’t,” I shouted at him. “Don’t ever come near me again. I hate you. I hate you so fucking much.”
I’d never said that to him before. Never. The thing is, I didn’t really hate him. I told myself that so I’d forget how much I wanted him. How much I craved Brent’s presence and his touch like I’d never craved anything else before. I didn’t want to feel that way about him. Didn’t want to want him at all.
He flinched. I could see the hurt in his eyes and the regret. He knew he’d pushed me and I’d reacted in the only way I knew how.
“I’m sorry, please don’t say that. You don’t mean it.”
“Yes, yes, I fucking well do. I hate you, Brent. I hate the day you came into my fucking life.”
Then I turned away and ran. I ran to my bedroom I shared with Fi, shut the door and flung myself into bed, burrowing myself under the covers as tears ran down my cheeks. My chest ached and my heart felt like it was in a vice.
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