by Kristie Cook
“Are you fucking kidding me?” I demanded. “Don’t you get it? I know exactly how you’re feeling. And all I want to do is take that away for you. All I think about is how to get us through this! I do everything for us! For you! So I don’t have to see that look in your eyes, feel the pain in your heart. I do see you, Tristan. And I hear you in my head and feel you in my soul. Don’t you see? I feel it twice as hard!” The last words came out as a shout, and he pulled back with a new look in his eyes. I sighed. “If feeling both of our pain meant you didn’t have to feel it at all, I would be fine with that. But you do have to feel it, and I’m sorry. I wish I could do more. I’m trying . . .”
He pushed his hands through his hair, and his ferocity deflated. “I know, ma lykita. The stone does it to me, too. We’re both feeling each other, and unfortunately, we’re both feeling nothing but negativity.” He reached out for me, but I stepped away. “Look, I’m sorry. I just . . . I guess I kept that pent up for too long.”
I shook my head. “That’s not all of it, though. You need to stop giving me that bullshit line about being reckless. I knew the situation. You and Vanessa would have followed me anyway, but I could have taken Victor on by myself, and you know it. You’re the one who says I’m just as powerful as you.”
“But not as knowledgeable,” he countered. “You’ve been a part of this world for two years. It takes decades to learn everything, especially about the magic. Why do you think Owen was in school for so many years? And he was raised in this world. Not to mention the politics or understanding why evil behaves the way it does. You still have way too much to learn. I can’t help but feel overprotective of you. Especially right now . . . with Dorian . . . I just can’t stand the thought of losing you, Lex.”
“Then protect me. But from my side. I can’t let everyone else do things that I wouldn’t do myself, Tristan. I can’t be that kind of leader. So please stop asking me to do that.”
We stared at each other for several long moments, but when he didn’t respond, I huffed out another sigh and stomped toward the house and up the stairs of the back deck. I leaned against the railing, my emotions stewing. Everyone was on edge lately. Well, actually, we’d all been moody for several months. We couldn’t help it. When you meet disappointment followed by more disappointment, you’re bound to get cranky.
As much as I hated how I felt now, though, Tristan and I had both needed to get that off our chests. He hadn’t been the only one keeping things pent up for too long. And we were both right in our own ways. I needed to show him more that I knew his pain and suffering. I needed to be there for him as much as he’d been there for me. And he needed to accept that I’d always be in danger, but that I couldn’t just sit in the house and let everyone else do the dirty work. That worked for Rina, but it wouldn’t for me. He needed to learn to protect me without holding me back, although I could, admittedly, be a little more cautious with my actions.
“I lost them.” Vanessa’s voice rang across the lawn as she emerged from the woods, her tone filled with defeat.
I frowned, said a prayer for Sasha, and turned to go inside, needing to address my issues with Tristan before focusing on the ones I had with Vanessa. I found him up in our suite. When I entered, he immediately swept me into his arms.
“I’m sorry,” he said, “so, so sorry, ma lykita. I shouldn’t have lost it with you. Not you. You’re my everything. You’re the last one I ever want to hurt.”
“Stop,” I said, the word muffled as I spoke against his chest. He held me so tightly I could barely breathe. “We both said things, and we both made valid points. You had every right to be angry with me. I’m sorry for not being there for you. You’ve been so perfect for me, and I didn’t return the favor. I didn’t give you what you need, what you deserve from your wife.” I pulled back to look up at him and squirmed an arm free to reach up and place my hand against his cheek. “I’m sorry, Tristan. I love you more than anything. I’m sorry I hurt you.”
His thumb brushed over my cheekbone. “I’m sorry, too. You’re right. I can be too overbearing when it comes to keeping you out of harm’s way.”
“You know that’s impossible, right? You of all people should know that about the world we live in.”
“I do. That’s probably why I try so hard. I wish I could just put you in my pocket, or better yet, lock you up in a security vault where no one can get to you and you can’t get to them. But I know that’s wrong.”
“I don’t think I can lead the way Rina does.”
The corners of his mouth turned down. “I don’t think you can, either, ma lykita. And that’s something I’ll have to figure out how to accept and how to handle.”
“Thankfully, we have plenty of time to figure it all out.”
His eyes glinted. “Maybe by then, you’ll have all this craziness worked out of your system, and you’ll be happy to be locked up in the tower, telling everyone what to do with your mind.”
I let out a harrumph. “Don’t count on it.”
He smiled. “I know. That will never be you, will it? And if I’m honest with myself, that’s part of what I love about you.” He leaned his forehead against mine. “Are we good?”
“I think so,” I whispered. “As good as we can get.”
Before anything else could be said, he tilted his head down and covered his mouth with mine. Tristan always had his ways, especially after an argument, and my body always responded, as it did now. He pulled me into our suite and closed the door behind us with his foot while he continued to kiss me, his tongue exploring every bit of my mouth. I pressed into him, my nipples poking through my sports bra and his t-shirt to brush against his chest. His hands slid up my sides and grasped my rib cage, his thumbs sliding under the bra and rubbing against the bottom bulge of my breasts. He continued kissing me as he began to push up the bra.
But I stopped him. “Not here.”
Chapter 19
Tristan’s mouth moved to my neck as his hand slid under the waistband of my shorts. “How about here?”
I giggled. “No, I mean not here at the safe house. I want to enjoy it.”
“Ah.” He groaned, his breath hot against my skin, but when he pulled back, he wore a huge grin. “As much as I hate to say it, sexy Lexi, you need to put more clothes on. We’re going for a ride.”
After all that talk about being unprotected and stupid, we snuck off on a motorcycle ride by ourselves. No warlock to shield or cloak us. No vampires or shifters to guard us. Just the two of us, risking our lives so we could be together the way we needed to be. Which basically proved my point that he and I could hold our own, and he knew it. Maybe doing so wasn’t ideal, but when was life ever ideal?
I wrapped my arms around him and pressed myself against his back, part of me anxious to get there already, wherever there was, and part of me simply enjoying the ride, as if we’d gone back in time to our early days when we didn’t have a care in the world. Well, at least nothing compared to this. We rode for more than an hour until we reached the Shenandoah National Park.
“It’s a full moon and you brought me to the woods?” I asked once we dismounted the bike. “Do you think this is a good idea?”
He gave me a wicked smirk as he swaggered toward me. His hands grasped my waist and pulled me to him, closing the remaining distance between us.
He leaned over and nibbled on my earlobe before whispering, “I thought danger was your thing.”
I smiled, unable to help it. “Well . . .”
“Besides, a little risk could add to the fun, don’t you think?”
His hot mouth closed over my throat. I must have needed him badly—worse than I realized—because my body immediately throbbed with an intense ache for him.
He pulled back, though, and began undressing himself, his beautiful hazel eyes never leaving my face. He pulled off his boots and then his pants and stood in front of me in all of his glorious nakedness. Holy fuck. How was I so lucky? After giving me a nice eyeful, he turned and strode tow
ard the stream, the muscles of his round, too-perfect-to-be-real butt moving in a way that made my throat dry. I couldn’t help but imagine biting it.
“Are you coming?” he asked me as he stepped into the water.
Sheesh. One touch from him and I would be.
My fingers trembled as I undid the ribbon and hooks to loosen the leather corset I’d changed into, my breasts aching against the confinement. Finally they sprang free, my skin tight with their fullness and my nipples hard.
“Mmm . . . that’s what I’m talkin’ about,” Tristan said quietly from the middle of the stream, his eyes filled with a greedy hunger. “Come on, ma lykita, the water’s perfect.”
My legs shook as I pulled off my leathers and practically ran for the stream. The water was far from perfect for a norm—freezing cold against my hot skin—but I quickly adjusted. Or maybe the heat radiating from my body warmed it. When I’d almost reached him, Tristan swam downstream several yards, to a deeper swimming hole fed by a small waterfall. He took my hand and pulled me through the curtain of water, to a crescent-shaped area carved out of the hillside by the stream—a shallow cave hidden behind the waterfall. The ledge forming the floor ended right at the waterfall, and the water over it was only knee-deep. The ceiling of the half-cave hung low—too low for Tristan to stand. He pulled himself to sit on the ledge, and I climbed onto him. And finally he held me in his arms again, and his mouth pressed down on mine.
His full lips moved gently at first, but I was too hungry for him. I thrust my tongue into his mouth and devoured his tangy-sweet taste. The kiss deepened and became more urgent. His hands slid over my back, up into my hair where his fingers tangled into the locks, and down to the small of my back. I grasped onto his neck, grinding myself against his erection beneath me as we moaned into each other’s mouths. I finally broke away, wanting to taste more of him. I moved my lips and tongue over his angular jaw, slowly making my way to the tender skin where his jaw met his neck. I sucked as though trying to eat him, my tongue swirling over his tasty skin.
He tugged on my hair, pulling me back, and his head dove for my breasts. I leaned against his hands supporting my back as he kissed the soft flesh, then his lips closed over my breast, and he sucked it into his mouth. I bucked against him as his tongue flicked and rolled my nipple and then his teeth grazed over it. My fingers dug into his shoulders when he moved to the other side. After spending some time there, I could tell he wanted to go further down. I leaned away, my head falling back, and the water poured over my hair as Tristan kissed down my stomach, his tongue making circles around my belly button.
Both of his hands slid to my butt, raising my pelvis to the surface of the water, causing me to fall backwards through the waterfall so I floated halfway out and halfway in. He lifted me higher and, understanding, I moved my legs to curl over his shoulders. My back arched to give him better access. My body throbbed with aching need. Then his hot mouth closed down on me and with the cold water flowing over my breasts, I’d never felt anything so erotic. My body bucked and writhed as his tongue moved expertly, taking me to a bliss I hadn’t experienced in way too long.
When the tremors subsided, I slid my legs down Tristan’s body, grabbed his shoulders, and pulled him out of the waterfall to join me. We locked in a kiss, and my legs wrapped around his waist. His erection pressed against me but didn’t enter as he moved us closer to the shore. We came almost all the way out of the water, and he walked us to a big, smooth boulder. His mouth still clamped on mine, he grasped my calves and gently broke their grip on him, making me stand on my own feet.
“Turn around,” he said. I turned around. “Bend over.”
He positioned me perfectly with one arm underneath my breasts so none of my skin scraped against the rock. His free hand massaged my butt and stroked downward until his fingers brought me to another climax. Then he finally pushed inside me. My mind had already been wide open, but I lost any and all control as he thrust into me, slid out, thrust in again. He knew when I was about to scream his name because he clamped his free hand over my mouth. I bit down on it hard enough to draw blood when he plunged in deep and hard and sent me over the edge again. He must have liked it because he gave me several more hard pumps before exploding inside me.
He collapsed against me, his hard chest thumping against my back as we both panted. His lips trailed light kisses over my neck and shoulder until the aftershocks subsided. Then he pulled back and kneeled in the water.
“I really needed that,” I said as I turned over, lay on my back on the boulder, and stared at the starry sky.
“I know,” Tristan said as he scooped water into his hands and poured it over my breasts and stomach. “It’s the least I could do for our anniversary.”
Shit. I’d remembered this morning, but had become distracted. “I’m sorry we fought on our anniversary.”
“Me, too. But it made the celebration all the much better.”
“Maybe this is the time we’ll get pregnant,” I said as my finger caressed the stone in my chest, although I didn’t tell him about the tea. For now, that would be Blossom’s and my secret. “An anniversary present to us.”
Tristan moved closer to me, bent over, and pressed his lips to the stone. “Maybe,” he murmured. “When the time is right, she’ll come.”
“Mmm . . .” came my only answer. Because who knew if she would ever come? The chances were so slim, even with the stone and the tea. Although I wanted a daughter badly, I would be okay. Unlike the rest of the Amadis, I could accept it if we never had one. Because I still believed Dorian came to us alone for a reason—that, like Tristan, the Angels had created him for us. Not for the Daemoni. Regardless of some stupid curse.
So why were they making it so hard to find him?
Why did they have to make everything so hard? My mood slid from absolute contentedness to sour quickly. Too quickly. The moment here had been nice, but it was time to get back to business. Tristan wanted to stay longer, but I was already out of the stream and pulling my clothes back on.
“I wonder if Sasha ever came back,” I said as I laced up my bustier.
“I’m sure she ran Victor off, and she’s waiting for us at home.” He made his way out of the water and began to dress. “But if not, I’m sure she’s romping around the woods or hunting for Dorian.”
“Hmm . . . I don’t like it when she takes off like that. And I hate that Victor’s still out there.” I placed my hands on my hips and scowled. “We really need a break. Some glimpse of victory for once. I mean, is that too much to ask for?”
“We do our part, ma lykita, and the rest will happen when it’s supposed to—”
A long howl cut off Tristan’s words. A wolfish sound. I held my finger in the air to keep him on pause while I reached out with my mind.
“Shifters,” I confirmed in a whisper. “Lots of them.” I counted the mind signatures I was picking up. “Fifteen, I think.”
“Daemoni.”
“Yeah, but . . . they’re weird.” I skipped from mind to mind, and my brow furrowed as I picked up their random thoughts. “They’re kind of freaking out. Really confused. I think . . . this is their first time changing.”
The words were barely out of my mouth when their meaning hit me. I’d just been asking for a break, and maybe this was it, but I tried not to let my hopes rise too much.
Tristan texted Charlotte with our location, and I thought it would take them at least an hour to drive here, but apparently my team hadn’t quite left us alone like we’d thought they had. Charlotte and Vanessa had stayed out of my mind’s reach, but they’d followed us closely enough to be there if we needed them.
“The others are on their way with the safe house’s vans,” Char said when they arrived. “Let’s try to make their trip worth it.”
I didn’t have to lead the way by following the wolves’ mind signatures. Their howls and whines could be heard by all of us. We came upon a pack of fifteen scraggly looking wolves, some fighting, snarling, and b
iting at each other, some jumping around in circles because they didn’t know how the hell they suddenly had four legs and fur, and others howling about their new freakdoms.
Trevor had told me a few things about alpha status and how to achieve and maintain control over a pack of wolves. Using this knowledge, I barked into their heads to be still and shut up while positioning my body to show domination. Their minds were very human, yet still controlled by the animal side of them. So they understood what I said perfectly and obeyed me as though I was their alpha. In no time, I had them sitting on their haunches in a line in front of us.
Through mind-speak with them, we learned how they’d all been at the same party a few weeks ago—a rough biker party that had been loud and a lot of fun, until they woke up the next morning after blacking out with the worst hangovers ever. Except the after-effects didn’t go away for a few days, and they assumed they’d been roofied. When the symptoms finally resided, they all forgot about it. Until the period of the full moon approached and their bodies ached and their skin crawled. They’d each received a text to meet at this park tonight, although it didn’t explain why or even say who sent it. They’d hoped to find answers to what ailed their bodies, but they only found each other. As soon as the sun had set and the full moon showed itself, they all exploded out of their skins—and found themselves in the bodies of wolves.
By the time we reached the point of explaining what had been done to them, the rest of my team had arrived. Jax and Sheree had to transform to prove we weren’t full of crap. Then we had to convince them that we hadn’t been the ones who’d infected them, but we could help if they wanted it. Once they understood better, two—a male and a female with darker, edgier minds than the rest of them—thought their new forms were badass, and they took off to hunt. The others, however, agreed they wanted nothing more than to remove the disgusting desire for human flesh out of their minds forever. The wolves followed me to the vans in formation and piled in.