“Okay.” Sarah hooked her arm in his, and they began walking again. “So, how have you liked Florida so far?”
Instantly, he was at war with himself. Disentangle himself, or enjoy her warmth. Ultimately, his heart won, and he relaxed. “It’s been nice. A little hot at times.”
She chuckled. “Wait until August. You’ll get a good idea of what hot and humid really is.”
“How about ye? Do ye like livin’ in Florida?” He shot her a side-glance.
“I’ve lived here all my life. The only time I’ve been somewhere else is when Penelope invited me to her wedding.” She stopped walking again and faced the ocean. “I do love it here. The salty air, the hot days and warm nights.”
Taran’s stomach twisted, but he kept the hurt from showing on his face. “I can see why ye love it.”
“I loved Scotland too,” she said and turned to him. “I loved how green it was. I loved the castles and all the history. It was beautiful. And there’s something so magical about it. It was like living in a fairytale.”
He gave her a half-smile. “Aye, but I’m biased.”
“I wish my mom was still alive. I wish I didn’t have the sanctuary. I wish people didn’t depend on me. I wish I could make choices that I wanted to make. And no matter how much my mom wants me to choose me, I can’t because, ultimately, someone will lose if I choose me.” Tears glistened in her eyes, and she looked down. “Sorry, pity party for one.” A tight laugh escaped, and she tugged on the bottom of her shirt.
Against his better judgment, Taran tugged her to him and held her. “It’s okay. It’s nae a pity party. Ye need to talk about things. Nae sayin’ them doesna make ye feel them any less. And hidin’ only makes it worse.”
She laid her head against his chest, and sobs poured out of her. He held her until she leaned back, wiping her eyes with the collar of her shirt. “I’m so sorry. I didn’t mean to do that.”
“That’s what friends are for.” Even red, puffy eyes couldn’t dull her beauty. It took restraint not to touch his lips to hers.
For a heartbeat, they stood quietly as the tension built around them. She stroked his cheek with the back of her hand. “You have no idea how badly I wish things were different.” Another heartbeat, and she lifted on her tiptoes and touched her lips to his.
At first, he stiffened, not knowing if he should kiss her back or not. After the last time, he didn’t want more of the same. He’d rather they didn’t share moments like this if it would lead to nothing. It wasn’t nothing to him.
She sucked his bottom lip between her teeth, and all his doubts were drowned out by his own desire. He gave himself over to her, pulling her close. She threaded her fingers through his hair, and their lips worked in harmony, making him dizzy. He didn’t care why she was kissing him, only that she was, and he’d enjoy every second of it.
He cradled her cheek with his hand and deepened the kiss. His heart pounded when she responded and kissed him with equaled passion .
She broke the kiss, and he thought for sure she’d run. Instead, she pulled his lips down to hers again, and this time, she kissed him with what seemed like complete abandon. Like there was nothing in the way of them being together.
His insides were a mess. Everywhere her body touched his, electricity traveled across his skin and through his body. She fit so perfect that there was no doubt in his mind she’d been put on earth just for him .
When she broke the kiss the next time, his heart plummeted. Something had changed, but not in the way he’d hoped. Tears pooled in her eyes .
“I’m sorry. I’m so sorry.” She pushed away and ran down the beach.
“Sarah,” he called after her. He was so confused. What had happened? What had changed while she was kissing him? Sitting down hard on the sand, he put his head in his hand and let his breathing return to normal.
He didn’t know what happened with her, but one thing he knew without a doubt: he’d fallen for her.
Chapter 22
With a moan, Sarah flopped back on her bed. What had she been thinking, kissing him? She’d been so good. So disciplined. But then he’d held her, and he smelled so dang good. Sea, soap, and masculinity. If that was sold in stores, she’d invest in the company. It was the best smell ever. Then his mouth was so close, and that sexy smile of his. He had such a way of making her feel so safe and secure.
She’d broken the kiss the first time with the intent to run, but those lips were screaming to be kissed. Pink, soft, and, man, was he a good kisser. Every time they kissed it was better than the last.
How was she going to face him in the morning? He’d been quiet and reserved the entire hour-long drive back. She could tell by the way he’d said goodnight and slipped into his room that she’d hurt him. The very thing she’d wanted to avoid.
Tears streaked down her cheeks, and she pulled a few tissues from the box next to her bed. She’d messed everything up. Now things would be even more awkward and awful, and it was all her fault.
If only her mom were still alive. Maybe she’d have advice. What was she supposed to do now? They still had more than five months together. If they couldn’t go three weeks without making out, how were they going to make it to Thanksgiving?
She dabbed her eyes with a tissue and twisted it in her hands. Maybe she could make it right. Explain that she just got caught up in the moment. She’d apologize and promise never to do it again.
Only, she wanted to do it again. A lot. She touched her fingers to her lips. She could still feel his lips on hers. Soft and wonderful. She’d melted into him, and nothing had ever felt as right as he did. Her Scottish farmer with the heart of gold. But he wasn’t hers, and he never would be.
Her shoulders sagged, and the tears came faster. Why did that thought make her heart feel like it was breaking in two? The only answer she had was that she’d fallen for him. Hard and fast.
Something she couldn’t allow to show. He loved his family, his farm, and his country. If she cared for him at all, she’d put him first. That meant not making him choose .
Of course, she could go with him. If Trudy wasn’t able to take over, maybe she could find someone. There had to be someone out there with the ability to manage the place.
Her heart sank at the thought. All the work that had gone into making this a success would just be handed over to someone else. What if they decided to change everything? Her mom’s life work would be gone, and it would be Sarah’s fault. How many kids had their fathers walk out and leave them? What if they needed this place like she had? It had given her so much. She couldn’t take that away from another child. She couldn’t leave.
Kissing him was a mistake, and she’d own up to it tomorrow morning. Hopefully, he wouldn’t hate her. He’d probably think she was crazy, but that would be better than hating her. Maybe.
* * *
Taran scrubbed his face with his hand. The night had not been kind. He’d gone straight to his room and taken a long, cold shower. Then he’d spent the remainder of the night tossing and turning, his thoughts never giving him a moment’s peace.
He thought for sure something had changed between him and Sarah when she’d kissed him, but he’d been wrong. She’d fled down the beach and then was silent the entire ride home.
How was he going to last with this kind of push and pull? One minute she had him at arm’s length, and the next, she was making him feel things he’d never felt before. Had it been a mistake to agree to a fake marriage? It had seemed like the right thing to do at the time, but now he was questioning whether he could continue.
He had fallen for her, and he’d never been more confused in his life. What did he want? How did he figure that out before his heart was crushed?
All he knew at the moment was that he needed a shower and a truckload of coffee if he was going to make it through the day.
* * *
The smell of coffee and bacon and eggs wafted through the air as Taran stepped out of his room, jerking him to the kitchen as though it
had fingers and was pulling him by the nose.
Sarah smiled as he entered the kitchen and handed him a cup of black coffee.
“Thank you.” Being in the same room with her was more awkward than he’d pictured.
“You’re welcome,” she said and paused. “I want to apologize for last night. I should have never kissed you. I was feeling alone and vulnerable, and I used you. It wasn’t fair to you, and I promise it won’t happen again. I hope you can forgive me.”
Apology? More like a dagger. He was gutted, but what could he say? He didn’t know what he wanted either. Falling for someone didn’t mean it could work. It just meant the connection was there. That there was a possibility for more. But there wasn’t a possibility for more. Not if he wasn’t willing to stay or she wasn’t willing to move.
Taran took a long sip of the coffee before answering her. “Think nothin’ of it. I didnae. It was romantic, and we got caught up in it.”
She hugged him around the neck. “Thank you. You’re the best.”
He didn’t feel the best. He felt terrible. Miserable even. And she had to stop hugging him. “I think ye were right. We need to watch crossin’ those lines and nae get caught up next time. If there is a next time.”
For a brief second, Sarah looked pained, but he must have imagined it. She smiled brightly and nodded. “I agree. It won’t happen again.”
“Good. Do you think Trudy will have time to show me how to lead the horses for the kids today?” He plated himself some eggs and bacon and took a seat at the table.
Sarah joined him with her own plate of food and sat across from him. “I think so. It’s Thursday, and most of them are doing physical rehab. That’s a good place to start. I’ve been doing it for a while. Mostly, it’s just working on coordination and muscle strengthening.”
“That sounds good.” He took a sip of his coffee and then gobbled up his food.
Sarah lifted her eyebrows. “Wow, you were hungry.”
That was part of it. Mostly, he just wanted to get out of there. He needed some fresh air. “Aye, and I need to get back to work. I lost a day yesterday, and I’m determined to get that barn finished.” He stood and picked up his plate. “I’ll see ye later.”
On his way out, he set his dishes in the sink. He didn’t even look back. Besides, it wasn’t as if she was pining for him. She’d never meant to kiss him in the first place. He needed to just calm down and remember this was only to save the sanctuary. There was no future for them, and he had to come to terms with that.
Plus, he was leaving anyway. He’d find another woman in Scotland, settle down, and have children. Sarah wasn’t the only person in the world .
His heart sank at the thought. She wasn’t the only person in the world, but she was the only woman for him. He’d fallen for her. The possibility was there when he’d agreed to the arrangement, but he had no idea it would happen so fast. He should have. It was Sarah, and he’d already cared about her before coming to this blasted state.
He had to shake it off, and the best way to do that was to plunge himself into some mind-numbing, muscle-burning work. He headed to the barn and pushed her out of his mind. If he was lucky, he’d get through the day without thinking about her. If he was lucky, which lately, he didn’t feel all that lucky.
Chapter 23
That evening, Sarah steeled herself as she exited her bedroom. Avoiding Taran until Thanksgiving was ridiculous. It was stupid to think she could live in the same house with the man and never see him.
Yes, she was attracted to him. Yes, she’d fallen for him. That didn’t mean she had to let it continue. Or that she couldn’t control her hormones. She wasn’t some goofy schoolgirl with no self-control. She was a Freeman, and Freemans faced their problems head-on.
Before she could take a step, she wilted and leaned against the wall. Who was she kidding? The look on his face when she apologized broke her heart. He’d looked so hurt and confused. And then he’d pulled away from her, both emotionally and physically. It was what she wanted, right? To keep him at a distance to keep herself from getting hurt. To keep them both from getting hurt.
Still, the look in his eyes haunted her. Like she’d cut him. She was only trying to protect the both of them. Didn’t he understand that? He was leaving, and she couldn’t go. She pushed off the wall and trudged to the living room.
Taran was lying on the couch, chin on his shoulder, and sleeping with one hand over his stomach and the other touching the flooring. Beautiful didn’t begin to describe him. He was so sweet and caring. In his arms, she’d never felt more protected. He really was the prince she’d been wanting and praying for her whole life.
Without even thinking, she crossed the room to the couch. He was a magnet and she just couldn’t help herself. She gently sat beside him and watched him. If things were different, she’d curl up next to him and never move .
He inhaled slowly and shifted on the couch. His scent of soap and aftershave whipped around her. She closed her eyes and breathed him in. When she opened them, he was looking at her with half-open eyes.
Something about the way he looked at her made her pause. His normally crystal-blue eyes were dull, but he had worked hard all day, up and down a ladder, fixing warped and broken siding on the barn. “I’m going to go make us some dinner, okay?”
He nodded, but she could tell he wasn’t quite awake. Then she noticed little beads of sweat covering his face. The room didn’t feel that warm to her, but maybe he was a hot sleeper.
She continued when he didn’t respond. “We can eat it out here. Maybe watch a movie.”
He nodded again.
Before she could stop herself, she leaned forward and kissed his forehead. His skin nearly burned her lips. She touched his forehead and then his cheeks. “Taran, you’re burning up. I think you got too much sun today.”
Now that she really looked at him, he looked paler than normal. She took his hand and checked his pulse. His heart raced, and hers immediately kicked into a matching rhythm .
Heat exhaustion .
It had happened to a few of the volunteers over the years. They’d forget to drink enough water, and then they’d pass out. It was a wonder he’d been able to take a shower and make his way to the couch. What if he hadn’t made it to the couch? What if he’d stayed in his room? The thoughts threatened to suffocate her. If something happened to him, she’d break into a million pieces .
She hurried out of the living room, running to the linen closet to grab a handful of washcloths before dashing to the kitchen to fill a bowl with ice and water. Back in the living room, she turned on the ceiling fan at full speed and sat beside him. She quickly dipped the washcloths in the water. He sighed as she laid one across his forehead and on his neck.
Based on past experience, he was dehydrated, so she went back to the kitchen and filled a large glass with ice water and brought it back. “Taran,” she said and shook him. “Taran, you need to drink some water.”
He mumbled something and tried to push the glass away.
“No, you have to drink.” She lifted his head and put the glass to his lips. “Come on. You need to drink.” A string of silent prayers began to stream from her. He had to be okay. If something happened to him…her breath caught. If something happened to him, there would never be enough air again.
“I’m nae thirsty,” his voice was low and gravelly .
She sighed in relief. At least she could rouse him. “Please, for me?”
He took a small drink and then another long drink before pushing the glass away. It wasn’t enough. He needed to keep drinking. Not only would it help with his dehydration, but it would also help bring down his temperature .
She lifted his head again and made him drink a little more .
He pushed the glass away again. “I’m dizzy and sick to my stomach. I dinnae want anymore.”
“I know, but you need to trust me. You need to drink.”
His skin was like fire to the touch. She rewet the washcloths
and reapplied them. Then she lifted his head again. “Drink some more okay? If you don’t, I’m going to take you to the hospital.”
He looked at her with hazy eyes and then finished off the water. “No more, please.”
The way he pleaded with her broke her heart even more. “I’ll give you a few moments, but you have to keep drinking.”
“Help me sit up. I’m hot.” His words came out slurred.
It was like trying to heft a hundred-pound sack of flour. He leaned against her with his head on her shoulder and his arms draped around her waist. His back was soaked with sweat.
“Let’s get your shirt off, okay?”
When she got no response, she knew she was on her own. With a lot of effort and some finagling, she managed to tug his shirt off. She dug in the bowl of ice water for another washcloth and rubbed it across his back. He didn’t make a sound as she repeated it a few times .
Before laying him back down, she pulled off the blanket draped over the back of the couch and placed it under him. Getting the cloth under him would keep him from sticking to the leather, and it would allow air to move around him.
Several hours went by as she worked to get his temperature down. She’d seen pretty bad cases of heat exhaustion, but his was the worst by far. Either that or she was too close to him to look at it objectively. Late into the evening, her efforts were rewarded, and his heart and temperature began to return to normal.
She felt like she could breathe again. She still wasn’t willing to leave him alone, so she quickly rearranged the furniture, pulling the coffee table out of the way and dragging the love seat directly across from the couch. Exhaustion from worry and stress settled deep into her bones as she lay down. She took his hand and held it to her chest.
Mending The Billionaire Brother (MacLachlan Brothers Romance Book 3) Page 13