by Sian Ceinwen
5
LEVEL 2 – The Morning After
Your baby is the size of a water bear.
In the last week, the sperm has met the egg and will soon become your baby. There are very few physical symptoms, and it’s likely you are unaware of your pregnancy at this stage.
Lita didn’t think she had ever felt as bad as she did on the drive back to her hotel from Sebastian’s apartment. Last night had been amazing—probably the best night of her life—then it had all been fucked up this morning. The change in him, when he’d realized the condom had broken, had been disconcerting.
She’d told herself last night that today she would deal with her feelings around becoming a notch on his bedpost, and now the time had come. Lita felt completely and utterly ashamed; the worst part was she hadn’t felt that way at all until he’d kicked her out of bed so suddenly this morning.
When Daryl pulled up at her hotel in the big black SUV, she thanked him and got out. Lita was grateful she hadn’t worn full party clothes last night. Being in jeans and a shirt made her a tiny bit more comfortable than if she’d had to come back in a tight dress.
Lita took the elevator up to the seventeenth floor, made her way to their room, and swiped her key card to get inside. There was no sign of Becky in their living area, and she checked the time on her phone, but it was early; Becky was probably still sleeping. Lita made her way to her bedroom and sat on the side of the bed, facing the window which showed her Lake Michigan.
She wanted to be sick. It had been a terrible idea to go with Sebastian last night, and worse to sleep with him again this morning. Lita felt like crying, but she didn’t—she knew she couldn’t change what she’d done. If there was one thing her many years with perfect recall of drunken nights out had taught her, it was that she couldn’t take anything back.
What she needed to do now was figure out how to get the morning-after pill. Their flight back to Seattle was in six hours, so maybe she’d be able to get it at a pharmacy here in Chicago. Lita searched on her phone and found it was ninety-five percent effective if it was taken within twenty-four hours of unprotected sex.
Lita searched for the number of a pharmacy at O’Hare. Lita had an awkward conversation in which she asked whether they had the morning-after pill available and if she could get it over the counter, or did she need a prescription? They confirmed they had it, and she would be able to purchase it, which was a huge relief.
Some part of her wanted to let Sebastian know what she’d just found out, but that was stupid; he’d made it clear he didn’t want to know her. She gave a bitter laugh out loud to herself—as if she’d be able to contact him anyway.
Lita started moving around the room to pack up her things. She took another shower, and this time she did cry a little, as she was reminded of showering in Sebastian’s bathroom this morning. She went to her suitcase, pulled out fresh clothes, and put them on, then pulled on her comfy Converse chucks. Time to go home and put this shit behind her.
Lita was sitting on the bed and scrolling through the Cruise Control subreddit when she heard Becky’s voice in the doorway, “Hey there, Skanky McGee!”
She turned to look at Becky, and her friend’s face fell immediately.
“What the fuck happened, Lita?” Becky gasped.
“The condom broke,” she shrugged.
“Holy fucking shit. Last night? Have you gone to a pharmacy yet?”
“No. We had sex again this morning. Sebastian is such a stronzo.” Lita narrowed her eyes.
“Yeah, well, we all know that.” Becky had picked up Italian swearwords back when they were teens, but she frowned as well. “He seemed surprisingly nice last night, though, or I wouldn’t have encouraged you to sleep with him.”
“Oh, he was fucking amazing, Becky. Great in bed—he knew exactly how to make me feel special and desperate for him to screw me. Even this morning, he was calling me ‘princess’ and telling me I’d given him ‘some of the best sex of his life.’ Some of, mind you. Then we had sex again, and the condom broke.
“It’s like he became an entirely different person. He told me off for not being on the pill—” Becky rolled her eyes when Lita said this.“Right? Oh yeah, dude, I’m just going to put up with all the bullshit of taking the pill every day when it’s completely unnecessary. I told him to fuck off when he said that, by the way.” Lita laughed bitterly.
“So then what happened?” Becky asked her quietly.
“He told me to go shower, which I did. Then I came back out, and my clothes were on the bed. I got dressed, then he told me to make sure I got the morning-after pill, and his bodyguard would drive me home.” Lita shrugged. “I don’t know what more I expected from Sebastian Fox.”
“As I said, he seemed really nice last night.” Becky hugged Lita.
“Yeah, but he has a reputation for a reason, I guess.” Lita looked at her, then a tiny smile crossed her lips. “The sex was really good, though.”
Becky grinned at her. “I bet. I almost came just watching you two together,” she winked.
“Oh, how was the rest of your night?” Lita asked, “Did you manage to convince Gabriel to leave Ariana?”
“No, but I did meet her!”
“What? For real? What’s she like?” Lita gasped as she asked these questions.
“Heather, too!”
“No way, that’s cool. What are they like?” Lita asked.
“They’re so, so nice. By the time limo came back, we were all over the club, but the guys felt bad about you ditching me,” Becky grinned, then continued, “Harrison and Heather live nearby, so we went there.”
“You went to the place where the interview was filmed?” Lita’s mouth dropped open in complete shock now.
“Dude, you fucked Sebastian Fox, but yes. Anyway, it looks nothing like it did in the interview. We talked about that; Heather said the show’s crew came in and moved heaps of shit around for it. We all just hung out for ages, having drinks, and talking. Heather is totally following me on Insta now.
“About one in the morning, we were all getting tired, so Hayden and I took the limo back to the hotel here––” she said, but Lita interrupted her.
“Wait, why just Hayden? Something you want to tell me?” Lita raised an eyebrow at her.
“If you’d let me finish, I would’ve explained Ariana’s bodyguard had driven her there, so Gabriel went home with her. Only one of us got sex last night, dude.”
They sat in silence for a minute, and Lita reflected on their weekend. It had been…more than she’d ever expected. More than any fan could ever have asked of their favorite band. They’d taken Becky to one of their houses and just been perfectly lovely to her.
Lita’s own experience hadn’t been all sunshine and roses, but it had undoubtedly exceeded her expectations. Objectively, she’d had some really great sex, and, as soon as she took the pill, this weekend would really be over.
She was reminded of something and said to Becky, “Sebastian said the weirdest thing as I was leaving.”
“What did he say?” Her friend looked intensely curious.
“He said, ‘this is why I never fucking sleep with them more than once.’” Lita frowned as she remembered it.
“Why is that weird?”
“Because, like, we only slept together on the one occasion. Sure, we did it twice, but only one visit, if that makes sense? Do you think Sebastian literally doesn’t have sex with the same person more than once?” Lita was mildly horrified by this.
“I wouldn’t be surprised. You should feel special, princess.” Becky gave her an evil grin.
“Ugh, don’t call me that ever again.” Lita rolled her eyes. “Okay, we have to leave soon. Are you packed? I need a bit more time at the airport to get this fucking pill now.”
They made their way downstairs and lined up to check out. Lita saw Phoebe was on the desk again today.
“Hi, ladies! I was hoping I’d get to see you today. How did last night go?” she asked them with a
massive grin on her face.
Lita froze, but Becky covered for her, “It was awesome. I got to go to Harrison and Heather’s place!”
“Wow, where they filmed the interview?” Phoebe looked suitably impressed.
“That’s what Lita asked too,” Becky laughed.
“Why weren’t you there?” Phoebe looked at Lita with interest.
“I left early.” She glanced at Becky, feeling her heart beginning to race in her chest.
“Lita wasn’t feeling up to partying on with us; she drank too much,” Becky laughed nonchalantly.
It wasn’t untrue, Lita thought to herself as Phoebe grinned at them. “I could be blind drunk, and I wouldn’t turn down spending time with Cruise Control. I saw them here in the lobby; they’re all gorgeous, aren’t they?”
“They really are,” Becky told her. “Not just to look at, either. Some of the nicest people I’ve ever met, to be honest.”
“I’m so jealous!” Phoebe said, then finally took their hotel room keys and let them sign for the room and leave.
There was another limousine waiting outside to take them to the airport, and Lita was relieved to be going home. She felt bruised internally, mostly her ego. When they got to the airport, they checked in and went through security before heading to the pharmacy.
“Hi,” Lita said to the woman at the counter, “I need to get the morning-after pill, please.”
“Okay,” the woman nodded.
She walked behind some shelving and came back with a woman who was probably in her late forties, and she smiled kindly at Lita.
“Hi, I’m the pharmacist here. I just need to ask you a few questions if that’s okay?” Lita nodded. “What’s your usual method of contraception?”
“Abstinence,” Lita said with a wry grin, then quickly added, “But we used a condom.”
“Why do you need emergency contraception?” the woman asked.
“Because the aforementioned condom was inconsiderate enough to break.”
“I see, and how many hours has it been since you’ve had unprotected sex?”
Lita looked at a clock on the wall, “Um, maybe six or seven hours, I guess? It was this morning.”
“Right. When did you start your last period?”
Lita hadn’t expected this conversation to be quite so personal, but she answered, “A couple of weeks ago, I guess. Let me check my app.”
She looked at her period-tracking app and confirmed she’d been correct; her last period had started two weeks ago.
“Are you currently on any other medication, either prescribed or unprescribed?” the woman asked.
“No.”
“I need to warn you that, because of where you are in your cycle, ovulation may have already started. If it has, the morning-after pill won’t be effective in preventing pregnancy as it can only prevent or delay ovulation if it hasn’t occurred yet,” she told Lita gently.
“Okay, thanks for letting me know.”
Lita felt numb as the pharmacist gave her the pill, with instructions to take it immediately, and a leaflet with possible side effects and further instructions. She thanked the woman, unable to believe that her trip to Chicago had ended like this. Finally, Lita and Becky were on their way. They went to the first-class lounge and got some food.
Lita looked at the glass of apple juice in front of her and pulled the box out of the paper bag in which it had been given to her. She frowned as she opened the box and slipped out the packet. There it sat—the single pill that signaled the very official end to her time with Sebastian Fox. Another wave of humiliation came over her as she remembered the way they’d , but she gritted her teeth and popped the pill out of its blister pack.
“Well, Chicago, it’s been fun,” Lita said as she put the pill in her mouth and swallowed.
They still had about forty-five minutes before their flight was leaving, and their mood was definitely a lot less excited going home than it had been on the way out here. About ten minutes before their flight was due to board, Becky squealed with excitement.
“Oh my god, Heather replied to my DM on Instagram,” she gasped.
“Really, what did she say? Wait, what did you say?” Lita laughed.
Becky handed her phone over, so Lita could see the message she had sent.
Hi, Heather. Thanks for following me. It was great meeting you last night!
A minute or so ago, Heather had replied to her.
No worries, Becky. It was great to meet you too. Tell Lita I’m sorry I didn’t get to meet her as well. Harrison said she was really nice.
“Holy shit. Harrison told her about me,” Lita gasped. Then she groaned. “Oh god…Harrison told her about me.”
Becky cringed. “I’m glad Sebastian didn’t give a shit about me—I wouldn’t have said no either.”
“As if you didn’t encourage me all night to do it. This is your fault; you’re a bad influence, woman.” Lita laughed as their flight was called for boarding. “Ah, well, it’s not like I’ll ever see them again for it to matter that they think I’m ‘just another one of Sebastian’s groupies.’” She rolled her eyes.
“I don’t think they did think that,” Becky said as they started walking toward their gate. “Things were so shit this morning I didn’t want to tell you.”
“Tell me what?” Lita stopped walking and turned to look at Becky.
“Dude, they legit thought Sebastian had the hots for you.”
Lita rolled her eyes again and continued walking, this wasn’t new information for her. “Well, no shit. He was hitting on me all night long.”
Becky kept up her pace. “No, as in Gabriel said, ‘I’ve never seen him like that,’ and then Hayden said, ‘I’ve never seen him pull out his Italian to impress someone,’ and Heather was, like, ‘Oh, she sounds awesome,’ and then she was asking me all about you.
“Legit, it was like she was sussing you out for her friend. I think they’re super close or something. Oh, and Gabriel said, ‘She totally called him out on his shit when she was deciding what to order.’ I think you really impressed him.”
Lita considered what Becky was telling her. It was strange to think they’d been talking about her last night while she’d been in bed with Sebastian.
As they approached their gate, Lita laughed. “Dude, did you gossip with Cruise Control about me last night?”
“Not just you.” Becky laughed as well. “Want to know more about Sebastian? I swear, by the end of the night, we all had you guys married off in our heads.”
“Pass,” Lita said, even though she couldn’t deny being curious. “Trust me when I say I know more about Sebastian Fox than I ever wanted or needed to know.”
“Liiiiike?” Becky teased her.
Lita looked around them as they joined the short line for priority boarding onto the plane, then said quietly, “Like he really likes kissing. We spent ages just making out. Oh, and he sniffed me.”
“He what?!” Becky’s mouth dropped open.
“Seriously. It was hot as fuck, too. I never knew how much I wanted a man to tell me I smelt wet, and like sex, and as though I was going to be tasty as fuck.” Lita bit her lip at the memory as they walked up to the gate and had their boarding passes scanned.
“He did not! I presume you just had an orgasm on the spot, then?” Becky smirked at her when they were walking along the air bridge toward the plane.
“Pretty much. Let’s just say it was a once in a lifetime experience and will basically be the source of my masturbatory fantasies until I’m old and gray.” She fanned herself.
They found their seats; they were sitting in the second row this time. As the plane took off, Lita felt a terrible wave of nausea come over her. She had enough time to search around in her pod before she found the barf bag in the area to her left, pulled it out, and puked all of her food into it.
“Shit, are you okay?” Becky asked her.
Lita shook her head, then puked again. It kept going until she was sure the entire contents
of her stomach must be empty. Almost immediately, once she’d stopped vomiting, a flight attendant was taking the bag away from her. The woman handed her a bottle of water, along with a warm washcloth to wipe her face clean.
They were halfway through the flight when Lita had a horrible realization. “Becky, the pill.”
“Shit. What happens with that?”
“I don’t know.”
6
LEVEL 5.1 – A Happy Event
Your baby is the size of a Nerd.
By week five, most people have discovered they are pregnant. The most noticeable symptom is usually a missed period. You may also be experiencing increased tiredness, sore breasts, and other aches and pains. You also may find yourself more emotional than usual due to the hormones going crazy in your body right now. Be kind to yourself and rest as much as you can.
It was almost ten at night. Lita had been working massive amounts of overtime since she got back from Chicago three weeks ago. They had a big game release coming up, and it was crunch time for all of the programmers to try and get the game .
She’d arrived back in the city and immediately booked an appointment with her doctor to discuss the issue of the morning-after pill. She’d seen him on Monday morning, and he’d advised her to take a second dose while warning her it was much less effective if it wasn’t taken in the first twenty-four hours.
He had repeated the warning from the pharmacist that it only delayed ovulation and could not help if ovulation had already begun. Lita had gone straight to the pharmacy and gotten another pill, after explaining again they’d used a condom which had broken, she was two weeks into her period, and with an added discussion about the pill she’d taken in Chicago.
After that, she’d gone about her daily life. Her thirtieth birthday party last weekend had been amazing, although she’d drunk far more than she meant to, partially to try and forget the weekend before. All of her family had been there to celebrate with her, and it had been great.