by Sian Ceinwen
“Yes, oh my god, it’s absolutely amazing. Sebastian put an offer in on Thursday, and we heard back yesterday that it was accepted. I can’t wait to move in,” Lita gushed.
“I’ll have to come to Seattle sometime and see it.” Heather smiled. “So, Seb isn’t moving in with you, I’m assuming?”
“No, he wasn’t ever going to be moving in there; I’m just renting it off him.” Lita blushed, wondering if Heather knew just how little she was paying in rent.
“Despite everything that’s happening, I’m still glad he has you in his life. I really thought he was changing, and I’m actually disappointed in him.” Heather frowned.
“It’s interesting because you have an entirely different view of him than I do. He’s acting in the way that I always expected him to.” Lita shrugged. “It’s just odd, sometimes, though. I mean, I’ve told you before, I was just a fan who wanted to meet her favorite band. Four months later, here I am, pregnant, and having Sebastian Fox’s baby. It’s crazy.”
Heather took a deep breath and exhaled it slowly. “Yeah, that would be a big adjustment. It’s weird for me because I’ve known them all so long. Ariana struggled with the fame thing at first too, and from what I can tell, you were a much bigger fan than she ever was.”
Lita cringed at her comment as Heather continued, “But, as part of that, I’ve seen Seb be this guy for years. Two completely different people, to be honest. The guy I know, who is amazing and sweet and wonderful and one of my best friends; he’s considerate and caring and loves so incredibly deeply. Then, on the other hand, there’s the guy who fucks every groupie who says yes.
“Don’t think that I don’t know about his personal rule; we all knew about it—never sleep with them twice. I don’t know when exactly he came up with it, but we were all shocked as shit when he told us he’d gotten you pregnant when you had sex the next morning.”
Heather laughed. “Hayden even said, ‘I can’t believe you didn’t have sex as soon as you got home, Seb!’ It’s literally what we all assumed, right then, that you two must have passed out and not fucked that night. You could’ve knocked me down with a feather when he said that he had. Then he started going to Seattle to see you, and you both seemed so happy. I know that you had your arrangement, but I really thought he was changing.”
“I did try to tell both you and Becky that our arrangement was what it was,” Lita said dryly.
“For what it’s worth, I really do think he’s in love with you, but I also understand why you don’t want a boyfriend who fucks other women every chance he gets.” Heather cringed.
“It sucks because I love him, and I do think that he loves me in his own way, but I don’t want to be in a relationship with him.”
Lita sighed heavily as the SUV had pulled up outside an apartment building in downtown Chicago, and Heather sent a text to Megan to tell her they were there. While they waited, Lita decided to send a text to Becky.
Dude, I’m on my way to Serenity with Heather to see my dress.
It was only a second before Becky replied.
Ooh, send me a pic. Tell Heather I said hi!
“Becky says hi,” Lita told her.
“Oh, she’s so nice. You’ve known her for a long time, right?” Heather smiled.
“Yeah, probably as long as you’ve known the guys; we met in high school.”
Their conversation was interrupted as a teenage girl, who actually looked to be about the age she was when she’d met Becky, got into the SUV. She had shoulder-length brown hair and dark brown eyes.
“Hey, Heather! Oh, is this Lita?” The girl leaned around Heather to grin at Lita.
Heather smiled. “Hi, Megan, yes, this is Lita. Lita, this is Megan, my intern.”
“Hi, Lita. You’re having Sebastian’s baby, right?” Megan asked.
“Yes.” Lita smiled as she said it. “I got a little more than I bargained for when I met Sebastian Fox.”
“Wow! That must have been a bit of a shock,” Megan said.
“It sure was,” Lita laughed.
It wasn’t long before they arrived at Serenity. Heather’s fashion label was housed in a factory warehouse in the industrial area of Chicago. The logo was painted on the glass front doors, which Heather unlocked to let them in.
The reception area had a desk and some chairs for guests to sit on, with a sculpture of Serenity’s logo hanging on the wall behind it. To the right, there was a door that Heather led them through, and they walked down a corridor. Heather pointed out her office as they passed it, then she opened a final door that led them onto the sewing floor.
The room was filled with sewing machines as well as all manner of fabrics, and there were a couple of mannequins with designs displayed on them.
“Wow, this place is amazing,” Lita breathed.
“Thanks.” Heather smiled at her, then continued, “Okay, follow me. Come see your dress.”
She took her to the side of the room, where there was a stunning floor-length sparkling gold dress on a mannequin.
Lita gasped when she saw it and said, “Holy crap, it’s amazing, Heather. Also, did you get a pregnant mannequin just to make this dress for me?”
“Yeah, I did.” Heather laughed. “I was struggling with how to make the material work around the stomach, so I needed a bump to work with. You can get them with all different sized bumps; it was hilarious.”
The dress had long sleeves, and it was made out of a stretchy, glittering material. When Lita put it on, though, it was loose over her bump. Heather had Megan help her by fetching any pins and things that she needed, and after about half an hour, Lita looked into the mirror and was amazed by her reflection. The dress hugged her pregnant curves and looked fantastic on her.
“When you described it to me, I didn’t think it could possibly look this good, Heather. I had been expecting some kind of dress that was tight over the boobs and loose over my bump.” Lita shook her head in amazement.
“A lot of people go that way, and I think later in your pregnancy, that would work better. Your bump is definitely bigger than I thought it was but accentuating it with the material is definitely the way to go now.”
Megan smiled at Lita and said, “You really do look gorgeous, Lita.”
“Thanks, Megan.”
Lita carefully took the dress off to avoid either getting pricked by the pins or dislodging them. Heather took it over to one of the sewing machines and set to work while Megan and Lita talked together about Cruise Control. They discussed the Heart Wide Open tour, and it turned out that Megan was on the Cruise Control subreddit as well. It was interesting to hear about Megan’s take on everything, but it made Lita feel very old.
Eventually, Heather brought the altered dress back to Lita, and she tried it on again. This time, it fit absolutely perfectly and looked phenomenal.
Lita had tears in her eyes and started crying. “Thank you so much, Heather. It’s just so beautiful.”
“You’re welcome,” Heather said and gave her a hug. “But you don’t need to cry.”
“Oh, I cry all the time,” Lita said through her tears and shook her head. “I never used to. It’s the stupid pregnancy hormones.”
They eventually left Serenity and went to a café in the city for lunch. When they arrived, it was fine, but by the time they were ready to leave, there was a group of paparazzi waiting for them.
“Fuck. I should’ve known that would happen. Okay, the priority is keeping Lita and Megan safe. Don’t worry about me,” Heather said to Callum when he told her, then she frowned and asked Lita, “Unless you want to wait, and we could get Ben to come get you?”
“No, it’s fine.” Lita put her hands on her baby bump. “We’ll be okay if Megan is okay. Megan?”
The young girl smiled. “I’m kind of getting used to it; I’ve been hanging around Heather too much.”
“Yeah, but your mom will kill me if you get hurt.” Heather cringed.
“I’m confident in my ability to get you three through
this crowd, Mrs. Fletcher.” Callum smiled at her.
Heather returned his smile. “Okay, I trust you, Cal. Let’s go, then.”
When they reached the door, Lita could see that the black SUV was a little way down the block, and there was a group of people with cameras waiting for them. Callum led the way, with Megan between him and the other two women. Heather put her arm around Lita’s waist as Lita crossed her arms over her bump.
“You’ll be fine, darling,” Heather whispered as they walked through the doors.
Callum called for everyone to move back in a similar fashion to the way that Daryl had in Seattle. They didn’t make as much room, but they did back away a little.
“Heather, is it true that you’re making Ariana’s wedding dress?”
“Are you going to the wedding tomorrow, Lolita?”
They had broken through the group and were continuing to the car, though the group of media people was still following them and asking questions. When they were almost halfway to the car, someone called out to them.
“Are you two having a foursome with Sebastian and Harrison?”
Lita felt like her entire field of vision turned red. It was such a rude question, particularly in front of Megan, who she knew was only sixteen. She broke free of Heather’s grasp and wheeled around to face them before speaking to the media for only the second time.
“That’s so absolutely disgusting. Are you proud of yourself?” Lita raised an eyebrow at the group, then indicated to Megan. “She is sixteen years old. She does not need to hear filthy suggestions like that from anyone or about anyone, let alone her friends. So, well done, you’ve got a response from me.
“No, I’m not going to have sex with Harrison. Ever. Heather is not going to have sex with Sebastian, either. You can quote me on that, and any time you want to ask me something like that, just go ahead and quote me again because it will always be my answer.”
Lita spun on her heel and continued walking to the SUV with Heather, Megan, and Callum following behind her. Callum opened the door when they reached it, and they got inside before he closed the door and got into the driver’s seat. Lita was breathing heavily and struggling to control her outrage.
“Wow, Lita,” Heather said. “That was kind of epic.”
“It’s not like I don’t know about sex, though,” Megan laughed.
Heather grinned at her. “Yes, but I think that shaming them for talking about sex in front of you is probably one of the only ways to get a result from them.”
“I’m just so over it.” Lita sighed, then looked at Heather. “How can I do this for the rest of my life?”
“I can’t pretend that it’s easy.” Heather gave her a hug. “It is worth it, though. Lord knows I’ve been through some shit with the paparazzi, but just remember that they don’t know the truth. They know what they think is the truth. They know what they see and put together by connecting those dots.
“The truth, though? That’s between Sebastian and you. That’s between Harrison and me. I’ve been down the path of reading the stuff they write about me, and I know that it’s easier said than done to tell you not to worry about it. I can tell you, though, that it’ll just get in your head and mess you up if you let it. Call me any time, day or night, if you’re ever stressing and you want to talk.”
Lita had started crying about halfway through Heather’s speech, and she gave her another hug.
“You’re the best, Heather. Thank you.”
23
LEVEL 18 – Sleep Tight
Your baby is the size of a tall, decaf, non-fat, Frappuccino with whipped cream and caramel drizzle…which you have to drink while hating the world because you miss caffeine.
As if it’s not bad enough that your sleep is being interrupted by multiple trips to the bathroom overnight, you are now being woken up by leg cramps. Even better? The experts don’t know why this happens. Try doing some calf stretches before bedtime, but also resign yourself to jumping out of bed and screaming blue murder in the middle of the night.
Lita was standing in a park with Sebastian; he was holding her hand and stroking her skin with his thumb.
“So, I think that if it’s a girl, we should name her Beryl,” Sebastian said with a wicked grin on his face.
Lita laughed, “Beryl, huh? Are you trying to pay me back for the Cletus suggestion?”
Whatever Sebastian had been about to say was cut off as his face went slack, and Lita was covered in a spray of blood as his body was peppered with bullets from an unknown gunman. His body dropped to the ground in front of her, and she dropped to her knees next to him.
Lita had never told him that she really loved him, and now he was gone. It felt as though her world had been ripped in half, and the pain she felt was like nothing she’d ever experienced before. She cried hysterically, wailing loudly as she hugged him to her, unable to believe that he would never speak to her again. How could this possibly happen? How could she go on without Sebastian in her life?
Lita was still screaming when she woke up. It took her a full minute to understand what had happened, and she was crying heavily. Her dream had been so real. She couldn’t get rid of the image in her brain of Sebastian lying dead in front of her.
She’d had vivid pregnancy dreams before now, but the nightmares had always been about something happening to her or the baby; this was the first one that had been about someone else. Lita was completely shaken by this dream. She knew that it wasn’t some kind of premonition or anything, but it felt terrible.
Lita grabbed her phone and checked the screen; it was just after three in the morning. She was still shaking and crying as she got up and went to the kitchen to pour herself a glass of water. On the way, she unlocked her phone and called Sebastian. He was probably sleeping, but she just needed to hear his voice. Even hearing his voice on his message helped a little.
“Hi Seb, it’s me. I just had a bad dream and needed to talk to you. I’ll see you at the wedding later.”
She took some deep breaths and blew them out slowly. Sebastian was fine, he was at the hotel, and it was Gabriel and Ariana’s wedding day. Lita walked back to the bedroom and wished more than anything that Sebastian was here with her. Her phone started ringing in her hand, and Lita felt a massive sense of relief when the words ‘Baby Daddy’ were displayed on the screen.
“Hi, Seb,” Lita said, unable to stop more tears from falling.
“Hey, princess, are you okay?” Sebastian’s voice was gravelly, and she thought that she might have woken him from sleep. “I got your message.”
“Yeah, I’m fine; I’m sorry for waking you,” Lita said through her tears.
“You’re crying. Was it really bad?”
Lita wiped away some of her tears and whispered, “Yeah, it was.”
“Do you want me to come home?” he asked her.
“No, you need to be there for the wedding tomorrow. I’ll be fine.”
Sebastian was silent for a moment. “Come to me, princess. I miss you anyway, and I don’t want you there on your own.”
“I don’t know, Seb, it’s three in the morning; I’d have to wake Ben up for him to come get me and everything.”
“Just get an Uber, Lita. I’m not normally one to forego security, especially when it comes to you, but I need you here with me. I doubt there’ll be any paparazzi outside at this time, but I’ll come down to the lobby and wait for you. I’ll deal with them if they’re there. Please come, princess?”
It was the question at the end, the begging tone, and her incredibly strong desire to see him in the flesh and banish the images from her dream that did her in.
“Okay, Seb,” Lita said, and relief washed over her as she said it. “I’ll see you soon.”
They ended their call, and Lita ordered an Uber to pick her up in ten minutes’ time while she quickly dressed and packed what she needed for the rest of the night and the wedding that was taking place later that day. She took her overnight bag and carefully carried the garment b
ag with her dress in it down to the apartment lobby to wait for her Uber.
When it arrived, she walked out to it, saying goodnight to Jeff as she did. Using the app, she shared her trip with Sebastian, so he would know when she would be arriving, and when they got to the hotel, she thanked her driver and walked inside. There weren’t any paparazzi waiting out the front yet. Sebastian saw her entering the lobby. He stood from where he’d been sitting in a chair to wait for her, and strode quickly over to her, wrapping his arms around her tightly.
Lita started crying again; she was so relieved that he was okay. That image of him lying dead was burned into her brain, and she was still having trouble getting rid of the sense of panic that the dream had given her. It felt so right to be here with him and held safely in his arms.
She was holding her overnight bag in one hand and the garment bag in the other when he used his fingers to tilt her face up to look at his. “Posso baciarti, princess?”
“Sì,” she told him with a nod.
Sebastian dropped his head to kiss her, and his lips felt like velvet as they moved softly against hers. He pulled her tight against him, her arms pinned at her sides with her hands full of her luggage, which stopped her from hugging him back like she wanted to.
“Come upstairs,” he said in a husky voice. “You look wrecked, and we probably both need to get some more sleep. Do you want me to get you your own room?”
He indicated to the hotel desk where the overnight worker was watching them with interest. Undoubtedly, they were the highlight of their boring night shift. Lita shook her head, and Sebastian smiled at her as she pushed away the guilt she was feeling for breaking her own rules. Again.
He took her overnight bag off her, and Lita carried the garment bag. He slipped one arm around her waist and held her next to him as they made their way to the elevator and then upstairs into his suite. He led her into a bedroom, and they put her luggage away before taking off their clothes and getting into bed.