Eyes
For
You
Dedicated to my love, Matthew, I never knew
what happiness felt like until I met you. I really believe you are the greatest thing that ever happened to me.
Chapter 1
September 2, 2018 9:05am
They say love hurts, but if it hurts, then why does everyone put themselves through it if they know they'll fall without being caught?
I don't think love hurts. Betrayal, rejection, losing someone, that's what hurts. Love itself doesn't hurt, it's what happens after, and that hurts. Love makes you feel heartfelt, beautiful and safe. As in, nothing would ever break you. I believe in love. Even more so, I believe that if you love someone so much, no matter what they do, you always find that little positive feeling. It’s that feeling that always overcomes all the negative.
Toxic people are known for being argumentative, contentious, abusive, and disrespectful. Some of them don't even know they are being toxic to someone they love. On the other hand, the person they love don't always know they are being abused. Maybe we all think its true love, but in reality we are just hurting ourselves continuously until there's nothing left to hurt.
"Anastasia!" My Mom yelled through our house. I put my journal inside my oversized bag and made my way to the bathroom to make sure I looked okay. My long blonde hair covered some of my freckles and my big green eyes popped because of the brown eyeliner I was wearing. As I put my hair in a messy bun, I made my way downstairs.
"Alright I'm here." I say as I stuff a whole muffin in my mouth.
As she's pointing to my pile of things, "Here are your books, suitca—"
"Toothbrush!" I realized I didn't have it in my bag. I ran back upstairs and grabbed my toothbrush. I bolted down the stairs grabbing my suitcases and running to the car.
"Ma! Do you have my books?"
"Yes Ana, they are in the backseat already. Now, get in the car because we have to be there in 6 hours!" I stuffed the suitcases in the trunk and hopped in the car.
I've lived in Medford, Oregon since I was born. My mom grew up here and since it's just us two, we decided to stay where we knew best. I'm on my way to Davis, California which is a 4 1/2 hour drive from my house. I got accepted to the University of California as a Biology major. My whole life I've been wanting to go to this school, so my mom was ready for me to finally fulfill my dream. On the other hand, she never expected to be this sad, neither did I?
Hours later
"Ah we made it! Ma look!" I squealed excitedly as I got out of the car to grab by bags. "My room number is
2344."
"Okay now let’s go search for it. I believe it's building
2." My Mom said while looking sad.
"Ma, I'm going to be okay you know. I'll come visit every month and I'll be home every holiday and break."
"I know I know. I am just sad that I won't be there every day for you."
"Nothing is going to change. I promise."
"Okay Ana."
"Here it is!" I smiled while grabbing my key to open the door to my new home. There are two beds and on one of them is a girl who seems to be getting her books in order.
"Hi." She said while looking up and smiling. She has dark brown eyes with long brunette hair. "My names
Emma."
"Anastasia but you can call me Ana." I said while smiling back.
I turned to my mom as I put my suitcases on my new bed. "Well, here I am. Everything is all set and I am ready for school!"
With a sad face my mom said, "Alright honey. Well that's it, so I will be on my way. Call me if you need anything Ana and I mean it okay? Call me whenever you can sweetie."
"Definitely. I promise." I stated while giving her a big hug.
"Well, I'll be off now."
"Love you."
"Love you too." She said while blowing me a kiss and shutting the door.
"It's sweet. You two seem really close." Emma said smiling and turning to me while I started unpacking.
"We are. It's just us two back home so we are inseparable." I smiled as I started putting my clothes in my drawers.
"Come on!" My roommate said while getting up and pulling me outside our dorm and into the hallway. I guess I’ll grab my clothes off the floor later. Girls with suitcases were everywhere, along with their parents.
"Where are we going?" I laughed.
"To see our new world. Maybe there's cute guys that are checking into their dorms too!" She squealed.
"No no no. I couldn't possibly go check out some guys. Let's go check in then see the campus...” "With some cute guys." She winked.
"With ourselves." I stated.
She turned to look at me, "Do you not like guys?"
It took me time to think about that question until I realized what she meant, "No I like guys! Just right now isn't a good time."
"Okay well," She exaggerated the word 'well', "be my wing-woman?"
"Is that even a thing?" I asked laughing.
"It is now!" She laughed. "Come on!"
"Alright Alright! The check in booth seems to be over there!" I pointed to two long lines of students. One line for males, one line for females.
We walked to the back of the female line and, "Oh yummy! Look at him" she said practically drooling.
"Okay. Check in now, drooling later."
"You're really not a good wing-woman." She said crossing her arms and rolling her eyes. I just laughed.
Chapter 2
1 hour later
"Glad that's over!" Emma threw up her arms in the air, while yelling loudly as everyone that was close by turned their heads towards us.
"Oh my god Emma! Are you always this loud?" "Once you get to know me, I get even louder!" "Yay." I state sarcastically and laugh at her.
"Hey! Don't bring down the Emma-nator!"
"Emma-nator?"
"Yes." She firmly stated.
"Alright Emma-nator, let’s go check out the campus!" I started laughing. We stopped by a little table that had a campus map brochure.
Emma grabbed a brochure and locked her arm with mine, "So back there when you said that right now wasn't a good time for boys, what did you mean?" She asked while turning to me.
"Well, my last relationship, he wasn't good for me. I gave him everything, he gave me nothing. He took parts of me that I can never get back. I'm not the ‘me’ I was before he came along and I need to find that ‘me’ again before I even think about guys." I turned to her and force smiled.
"Nobody can force a smile better than that," she said rolling her eyes then laughing. "Look, all guys are idiots. They are blind to what's right in front of them. They'd rather have some slut than a good woman. So smile right now, a real smile! You are so much better than him Ana!" I started laughing, "Thanks! Are you hungry?"
Uh yes! I am never not hungry."
I already love this girl, "Pizza?" I asked.
"Pizza."
There was a little pizza place on campus. We decided to order takeout so we could sit outside and enjoy the nice weather.
We got our large pizza and a drink for each of us. Emma had the pizza, I had the drinks. Emma opened the door to step outside and I walked out first. There's a park with an open field in the middle of the campus. There were guys playing football, girls cheerleading, and students checking out the campus. It was like a little bubble of our own world, we were ready to sit down on a bench.
"Watch out!" I hear a guy yell. As I turn around, my face gets hit with something hard.
"OW!" I scream as I realized it was a football. I fall to the ground and our drinks spill all over me. I saw a worried guy run over.
“I
was supposed to catch that and I couldn't reach it in time. Are you okay?"
As I was getting up off the ground, Emma was grabbing all the napkins that the pizza guy gave us. "Do I look okay to you?" I snapped.
"I'm sorry. We should have never even been playing there in the first place."
"Ya think!" I stated annoyed trying to squeeze out some of the drinks out of my shirt. I was soaked.
"I'm so sorry. Here, take my shirt." He said while hurrying to get his shirt off.
"No really, it's okay."
"Here! You can go in the restaurant bathroom and put on my shirt okay? I insist."
"Thank you" I said smiling. I looked at Emma inhaling a piece of pizza, "I'm going to go in and change quickly."
"Sure thing!" She said with food in her mouth. I rolled my eyes and ran to the bathroom.
I walked in the bathroom and looked in the mirror. I had a red mark just above my eyebrow, my hair is soaked and it smells like Coca-Cola. I tried to brush my hands through it, which wasn't working out so I just put it up in a bun. I took my shirt off and slid his on. It's huge on me! I look like I'm wearing a dress but damn does it smell good. I shake my head, took one last look in the mirror and went back outside.
"Thank you for the shirt, I will wash it and give it back to you later." I smiled to him.
"No, I don't mind you keeping it. It looks better on you than it ever did on me. My names Travis." He said while smiling and sticking his hand out.
"Anastasia." I said while shaking his hand.
"That's a... that's a beautiful name."
"Thank you Travis. Well, thank you for the shirt." I said while grabbing Emma and a piece of pizza.
"Welcome! I hope to see you around Anastasia." "We'll see." I waved while walking away with Emma.
"He was beautiful Ana and he totally thought you were cute." Emma stated.
"No Em! Remember? I just can't." I said rolling my eyes at her while stuffing the rest of my piece of pizza in my mouth.
"Ugh Alright. You could at least try. What's the worst that can happen?"
"I don't know."
I finally showered and got all that sticky Coke off me. Em and I are in our room trying to figure out what to wear tonight. The campus is sort of throwing a welcoming party, or should I say the students are throwing the welcoming party. It's a frat thing, I guess? "Here Ana. You have to wear this!" Em squealed. It was a beautiful fitted black mid-thigh dress. My whole back would be out but it is high in the front, so I won't be showing anything I shouldn't.
"That's a beautiful dress but it's wasn't in my closet?" I asked confused.
"No, it was in mine!"
"I can't take your dress! It's yours!"
"Just try it on or I will rip your clothes off and put it on myself."
"Geez…"
She proudly showed off that evil smile of hers that I have seen too much of in the first day of knowing each other. I stripped down to just my panties and pulled the dress up from my legs. I looked in the mirror and it's a perfect fit. "It looks a-mazing on you!"
"I love this dress!" I said turning around to see the back. It's a perfect dress.
"Here! These are your shoes and they will go perfect!" These were my bright red high heels. I brought them because I've never worn them before. I honestly don't know why I bought them in the first place but I guess they were bound to come in handy at some point. I slipped them on and looked in the mirror.
"This outfit is...”
"HOT!" Emma cut me off.
"It really is!" I said excitedly while brushing my long blonde hair and leaving it naturally wavy. I put my red lipstick on to match my shoes with just a little bit of eye makeup. I don't like to go overboard.
"Perfect! Okay now me! I think I'll wear this?" Emma asked while slipping her dress on. It was a black dress that was mid-thigh as well, but it was completely opposite of mine. It was high in the back and very lowcut in the front. It looked perfect on her!
"Wow! That looks amazing!" I said in awe while she fixed her naturally straight hair and put some nude lipstick on with perfect winged eyeliner. "Okay, I have no idea how you do that."
"What?"
"The perfect winged eyeliner... on both sides... looking that good!"
"Ana it’s easy peasy, Emma breezy!" I couldn't help but laugh and shake my head. "Are you ready?"
"Yes let's go!" She said while grabbing my arm and pulling the door wide open.
It took us about ten minutes from our house to this house. So many people are here it’s crazy! As soon as we walk in, Emma goes straight for the alcohol.
"Tequila?" Emma asked.
"Yes! Just know I'm a lightweight though, so I can't drink too much."
"Nonsense! You should be drinking. It's Friday night and classes don't start until Monday. You'll be fine! I don't get drunk fast so I'll take good care of you." She stated while handing me a red solo cup filled halfway with tequila.
"Are you trying to kill me?" I asked her while looking in my cup to find only tequila.
"Let loose. Have fun and enjoy!" She said while grabbing herself a cup. We learned today that we are both of age, since we went to community college before this for a few years. So it is legal for us. It was hard to move anywhere because of all the people. There's a dance floor, DJ, alcohol, just people having fun. I should have some fun too. I deserve it. My ex never let me have fun, otherwise he'd lecture me for weeks after and we'd get in a huge fight. I couldn't do much because he'd interrogate me, so I tried to ignore that bar drinking and party stuff.
"Let's go dance!" Emma said, getting me out of my trance. She grabbed my arm and pulled me to the dance floor.
"Everyone's looking at us! Maybe we should go walk around some more!" I raised my voice so she could hear me over the loud music.
"That's because you are gorgeous! Look at those long legs and hair! Don't get me started about those eyes!"
I laughed and yelled, "Absolutely not!"
She nodded and we just laughed and danced like we were the only two people in the room. We were having fun. For the first time in my life, I was really having fun. I enjoyed being myself. I don't have to be scared anymore of what I have to go home to or that I'm scared of being my full self. I deserve this journey and I deserve this fun.
We were on our second glass and I was getting pretty tipsy, so I walked off the dance floor to get a bottle of water. As I was drinking, I was watching Emma. This girl is crazy but so fun. She'll get me out of my comfort zone and this is something I need more than anything. I set the bottle of water down on the table and went to look for the bathroom. After walking around for ten minutes, I finally found a bathroom. I went to go shut the bathroom door when someone pushed it open. Before I could process what was happening, I felt a hand on my lower back. I turned around to see a drunk guy that was full of sweat. He was pulling me up against him, touching my lower back with one hand and grabbing my ass with his other hand.
Chapter 3
"Get off of me! Don't touch me...” He was trying to get in my dress through the lower back opening. I kept trying to push him away but he was too strong for my slim figure. "No please stop... get off of me!” His hand moved to my neck when I tried screaming. No one heard me… the bathroom was too far away and the music was too loud. "Please get off of me! Please!"
"Come on baaaaaby.. you know yyyy-ou want a piece of thissss" he said drunkly. I kept trying to push him off of me but he wouldn't budge.
"Please no stop... please stop." I cried out to him while trying to get away from him. He choked me harder so I couldn’t yell anymore.
Next thing I know, I felt a release of pressure lifted off my body. I fell to the floor because he had a good grip on me. I look up and see a man punching the drunk guy.
"Walk away... now! Before I finish you out." The man said while being really close to the drunk guys face.
"You going toooo act like a tough gu-y in front of the laaadyyyy? ..." he said while looking up at him. His face changed o
nce he looked at the man who punched him. "Uhhh ... yeeess I am so-rrry. It won't haaaapen agaaain, Stone." The drunk guy said as he walked away. Stone? Is that really his name?
"Anastasia!!! Are you okay?" "Travis?" I asked confused.
"Yes! Are you okay?" He said while bending down and grabbing my hand. "Did he hurt you?"
"Uh... no. I'm okay I think." My back was towards the bathroom mirror and Travis looked in the mirror.
"Anastasia! You are not okay! Come here." He said while picking me up to sit me on the counter. "You have a deep scratch on your lower back. I have to clean it up. You have a mark on your neck but hopefully it will be gone tomorrow."
"Stone?"
"It's a really long story." He said while grabbing a wash cloth and some peroxide. He soaked the wash cloth and went to go put it on my scratch.
"NO! STOP! Don't touch me! Don't touch me please." I yelled and he backed away a little bit.
"You're in shock Anastasia. Hey." He said while coming closer to me. "Look at me." As I looked up to meet his eyes, a tear fell. "Hey hey. It's okay. I'm here. I’m right here."
"If you weren't. If you weren't there. He... he would...
he...” I just couldn't get the words out.
"But I was here. It's okay Anastasia. I won't hurt you. No one will ever hurt you as long as I'm around. Can I clean out this scratch?" I just nodded my head. He started to clean the blood that was oozing out of the wound. I winced, "Are you okay? I'm sorry. I just need to get this cleaned up because it's pretty deep." I just nodded my head and squeezed him arm while staring at him and making sure he doesn't go any lower. After a few minutes go by, "There. Now I just have to put the bandage on then I will take you back to your dorm." "Emma." I said to him.
"I'll find her. Let's go." He said while picking me up. One arm went under my knees and the other one was holding my back carefully so he didn't hit my cut. I rested my head on his chest. As we walked through the crowd. "ANA!!! I have been looking everywhere! Where were you? What happened? Are you okay?" She ran to me worried.
Eyes For You (Chasing Tomorrow Book 1) Page 1