by Alexa Martin
“You good?” TK asks, his beard tickling my neck.
“I’m dead,” I say between harsh, deep breaths. “You killed me.”
“And I can do it again.” I don’t even have to look at him to see the smug smile on his face.
“There’s no way I can . . .” I stop myself, remembering that was only the appetizer and I want the entrée. “Never mind.” I roll over, opening my eyes. I bring my hands to his chest, moving them down . . . down . . . down. Until I reach his . . . “Wait.” I sit up straight, not needing to look hard since the lights are still on. “You still have on pants?”
“Yeah.” He answers my rhetorical question.
“Obviously.” I roll my eyes and send up a quick prayer to the God of Sexy Times he won’t ruin the mood. “Take them off!”
I don’t mean to yell, but holy hell! You can’t make a woman come her brains out twice and not be prepared for the next stage of the game. It’s in the Sex Rule Book or something.
“Damn.” He holds up his hands in surrender and smirks, still looking cocky . . . in the wrong way. “I’ll get right to that, ma’am.”
“I will hurt you, TK.”
I’m revved up on lust and emotion. I am not the one.
But then he does drop his pants. And maybe I am the one because Holy. HOT.
I mean . . .
DAMN.
“Penises aren’t supposed to be pretty,” I say, not making eye contact . . . not even close.
“You’ve seen it before.” He walks to his discarded suit jacket and pulls his wallet out of the inside pocket. He flips it open, and before I know it, he has a foil packet in his hand.
“I haven’t seen it like this.” I somehow remember how to speak as I watch his hands roll the condom over his impressive manhood. I clench my thighs together again, amazed I still have feeling down there.
TK moves to the bed, his quadriceps flexing with every step. The cuts at his hips point down to his erection, which is standing tall and swaying in a way so hypnotizing, I’m not sure I’ll ever be able to break free of his spell.
Not that I want to.
“Come here,” I whisper, grabbing his hand as soon as he sits on the bed and pulling him on top of me. With my free hand, I try—and fail—to wrap my fingers around him.
I don’t close my eyes this time and neither does he as I guide him to my opening. Ever so slowly, he pushes in, letting my body adjust one inch at a time until he’s buried inside me.
He flexes his hips but pulls back when I flinch from the bite of pain it causes.
“Are you all right?” he asks. His arms are shaking on each side of my head, and with the light on, I can see the beads of sweat building on his forehead.
I take inventory of my body before I answer. I tilt my hips upward, the discomfort I felt only seconds ago beginning to fade. “Yeah.” I reach up, locking my hands behind his head and pulling his mouth to mine. I open my mouth for him and he slips his tongue in without hesitation and I can taste me on him.
Any remnant of discomfort dissipates and need replaces it. “Go, TK.” I nip at his bottom lip. “Please.”
That’s all the convincing he needs. It’s like I flipped a switch and the tender, gentle man I was just with turns uninhibited.
And I love it.
He slams into me with abandon. His strength gives it to me in ways I’ve never experienced before. It’s not long until he’s moved me up the bed, my head hitting the headboard in sync with every thrust.
“Fuck yes,” he growls before pulling out, flipping me onto my knees and slamming back into me from behind.
My back arches into him as I try to meet him thrust for thrust. The only sounds filling my small house are our heavy breathing, moans, and his thighs slapping against my ass.
That familiar pressure starts to build, and my body goes solid, I clench around him as he continues his glorious assault.
“Come on, baby.” He wraps my hair around his fist, pulling my head back. “Get there.” he says into my ear, his damp skin brushing against mine before dropping his other hand to my sex.
I feel him everywhere.
“Oh my god!” My knees give out beneath me as I come . . . again.
It’s fast and so intense, everything fades away. I hear TK call out his release, but he sounds so far away. I think he’s whispering something, but it’s impossible to hear over the roaring in my ears.
“Holy shit,” I tell my mattress after my breathing has returned to normal, TK’s weight still resting on top of me. “That was amazing.”
“That was better than amazing, Sparks,” TK says into my hair before rolling off me. “That was fucking life changing.”
Damn straight.
This might not be a forever thing, me and him, but it is a right-now thing. And so, for now, I’m going to take advantage of every second I have left with TK.
I smile to myself, enjoying the aches I know are going to be fully present in the morning.
Then I fall asleep.
With the light still on.
Twenty-five
“Look who finally decided to join us.” TK smirks, pushing a large Fresh cup across the table. “I wasn’t sure what you ordered, but Ace said it’s always a vanilla latte, so that’s what you got.”
“Are you feeling okay, Mom?” Ace asks, handing me a Fresh bag I don’t need to look in to know it’s a blueberry muffin. “You never sleep this late and you look different.”
I’m fine. Your dad just put it down so hard last night . . . and again this morning.
“Yeah, dude. I just had a long night at work. I guess I was more tired than I thought.” I give him an answer that won’t leave him emotionally scarred for the rest of his life. “When did you get home anyway?”
“Like an hour ago.” Ace shrugs. “TK picked me up from Mrs. Vonnie’s house and then we stopped at Fresh on our way home.”
Ace has his back turned before he finishes talking to me, so he misses it when my eyebrows try to take cover under my hairline.
“You picked him up?” I turn to TK, not sure how I feel about this.
His shoulders tense in a way that lets me know my tone isn’t as happy-go-lucky as I hoped it was. “The vets got excused from training camp today,” he tells me for some reason. “I dropped my stuff off at my place and Justin and Vonnie live right around the corner from me. I figured since I was right there, there was no need for you or Vonnie to go out of your way.”
“I don’t mind picking him up.” I reach for my coffee and train my eyes on the floors I need to mop to avoid looking at TK. “You should’ve called me first.”
“I did, four times,” he says matter-of-factly.
Crap.
I close my eyes and draw in one of the deep breaths Sadie is always telling me to take after she goes to her once-a-month yoga class.
“I . . .” I pause, trying to think of an excuse to leave. “I forgot to brush my teeth.”
I spin on my fuzzy slipper before TK can call out my lie, and I head straight to the bathroom.
Once I’m in the small, outdated room, I slide down the door, not even flinching when my shorts-clad legs rest against the cold tile floor.
I don’t understand what the hell is going on with me.
All I ever wanted was a reliable partner who cared about Ace just as much as I do. And now I have him, and he’s TK of all people. It’s so much more than I ever even let myself dream. And the first time he does the smallest thing on his own, like giving our son a ride home, I freak out!
Again, what is wrong with me?
I don’t know if it’s all the crap with the flowers, the things TK said to me—or the way he touched me—last night, or what, but I’m a straight-up disaster.
I swipe the tears falling down my cheeks and resist the urge to scream. It’s like I’m incapabl
e of accepting good things in my life. I want to be the person who just says thank you when TK does something kind. The type of woman who says “I love you” back to the man she’s loved her entire life.
But that’s not me.
No.
I’m the kind of person who thinks TK had to pick up Ace only because I was being irresponsible and overslept, knowing my kid might need me. The person who cries on a bathroom floor thinking of how much it’s going to hurt when this illusion finally blows up in my face.
So much for enjoying this while it lasts.
“Poppy?” TK knocks on the door.
I clear my throat and scramble off the floor. “Yeah?” I ask, but it’s too high and peppy to sound anything but forced.
“Can I come in?”
“Umm . . .” I look in the mirror, viciously wiping away the tear marks lining my face. “Sure.”
I open the door when I look only a little bit like hell.
“What’s up?” I try to step into the hallway with him, but TK pushes into the bathroom instead.
Now even with Ace, it’s a tight squeeze if we both need to be in the bathroom at the same time. With TK’s giant ass, I feel like we’re at risk of running out of oxygen.
“That’s what I was going to ask you.” No nonsense and straight to the point. “Why were you crying in the bathroom?”
“Crying in the bathroom?” I purse my lips and arch a single eyebrow. “I was not.”
“Poppy.” He tilts his head to the side and narrows his eyes. “It’s your move. You don’t like people to see you upset so you hide in the bathroom. You missed half of homecoming sophomore year in the bathroom because that one chick had the same dress as you.”
“It wasn’t just because she had the same dress, TK! Victoria was at the store when I picked my dress. She did it on purpose because she was skinnier than me and had the hots for you. It was an intentional jab!”
Bitch. The dress looked better on me anyways. Orange is my color. She blended into it from all the fake tanner she used.
“So you don’t deny hiding in the bathroom?”
“It wasn’t because I was sad,” I defend myself, though not well. “I was pissed and I couldn’t fight her because I paid for my makeup and hair. I was not letting her ruin it.”
“So you’re pissed now?” he asks, using my words against me.
Sneaky son of a . . .
“No, I’m . . . I mean . . . I’m not pissed,” I stutter.
“So you are sad.”
“No!” I throw up my hands in the air, already exhausted by this conversation. “I’m not pissed or sad. I’m just . . . I don’t even know how to say this.”
“Just say it.”
“I’m just not used to people helping out with Ace, that’s all.” I tell him the simplest version of the garbage running through my mind.
His eyebrows scrunch together and he shakes his head ever so slightly. “Isn’t having help a good thing?”
“Yeah . . . no . . . I don’t know.” I want to sit back down on the floor, but there isn’t enough room for my legs and TK’s feet. “I just like doing stuff for him and I feel like a crap mom for sleeping through your calls.”
“He’s my kid too.” All of a sudden there’s an edge to his voice that wasn’t there seconds ago. “Maybe I like doing stuff for him and it has nothing to do with you as a mother.” He rubs the back of his neck, and I swear, I can hear his teeth grinding.
“I know that.” I draw out each word. “Why do you think I’m in the bathroom trying to sort out these irrational feelings on my own?”
I wait for some kind of response, any acknowledgment I spoke at all, but I don’t get one.
And to be honest, he’s too grown to pout.
“Listen.” I stand up straight, using my “I mean business” mom voice. “I think we both need to understand this is an adjustment for both of us. I get you want to spend time with him and make up for time lost, but you need to understand that I’ve had him to myself for nine years. Learning to share isn’t easy for me.”
That gets through to him.
“You’re right.” He drags his large, callused hand across his face. “This isn’t even why I came to talk to you.”
“It isn’t?” I ask, my eyebrows shooting up to my hairline again. I swear, a few more days with him and I’m going to have to make a Botox appointment. These surprise lines are gonna settle at some point.
“No.” He reaches out, lacing his fingers in mine. A move that both makes me melt into him and causes my back to go straight in anticipation of what he’s about to say. “I didn’t sleep much last night.”
“Probably would’ve been easier if you turned off the light,” I offer.
Helpful? No. Funny? I think so.
I laugh.
TK does not.
“That wasn’t why.” He rolls his eyes and fights a smirk I can tell is tugging at his lips beneath the beard I love even more after last night. “Like I was saying, I didn’t get much sleep thinking about you and Ace being alone in this house with the . . . flower incident.” He drops his voice to a whisper for the last two words. “Then after Coach dismissed us from the hotel this morning and I went to my house that’s way too big for one person anyways . . .” He trails off.
The hairs on the back of my neck stand up, knowing where he’s going with this. I want to cut him off, but I don’t, if by chance I don’t really know where he’s going with this.
“I was thinking you and Ace could move in with me,” he finishes, looking as hopeful as Ace does every time he asks to play football or to get a puppy.
Neither of which will ever happen.
“We can’t move in with you.” I don’t try to soften my answer.
“Yes, you can. My house is huge. Ace already has friends down the street.” He starts ticking off the items on the list he must have built in his head. “It’s actually in a safe neighborhood.”
I think not.
“This is a great neighborhood, thank you very much.” I pull my hands out of his grip. “And I don’t care how many reasons you have why we should move in with you, it’s not going to happen.
“School starts in a week, the same school he’s attended since preschool. The soccer field for the soccer team he just made is right around the corner. His best friend lives at the end of this block.” I resist the urge to shake TK, I’m so irritated to even be having this conversation. “This is the only home Ace has ever known. I might not be the perfect mom, but I pride myself on providing him with this kind of stability.” TK starts to speak, but I keep talking. “I’m sure your house is amazing. Bigger and newer than this one, but that’s not the point. We cannot uproot his life. Especially now, when he’s still adjusting to the crazy bombshells that were dropped on him this summer.”
“I didn’t mean to insult you. This is a great house and I told you Gavin pretty much lives next door when they’re in town, so I know it’s not a bad neighborhood. I don’t know why I said that,” he half apologizes, which I guess is better than no apology at all.
“It’s fine. I might say things I don’t mean occasionally too.”
This makes him laugh for some reason.
“Occasionally?” He reaches for my hands again and pulls me into his chest.
“Maybe more than that,” I amend, fighting back my own laughter.
My temper has always been a bit—how should I describe it?—touchy.
“I’d say so,” he whispers into my hair.
We stand in my bathroom, cuddled together for what could be hours but is probably only a few minutes. Both of us taking comfort in the other, letting the weird emotions we’ve both been feeling settle around us. I’d worry Ace would start to get concerned . . . or grossed out . . . but he has full remote access and probably hasn’t even realized we’re gone.
“Well.” TK’s voice cuts through my thoughts. “If you won’t move in with me, I guess I’m gonna have to move here.”
My head is facing the mirror, so I get a firsthand view of my eyes tripling in size and the color draining from my face.
“Y-you . . . you’ll move? Here?” I stutter. A speech pattern, I’m learning, is becoming a staple of mine around TK.
“Yeah.” He looks at me like it’s the most obvious thing in the entire world. “At least until all this stuff with the light and flowers is worked out. It’ll be great. Ace can stay in his house and school. I can spend more time with both of you. You won’t have to be alone here. And I won’t have to worry.”
“Yeah . . . it’ll be great,” I repeat after him.
But I don’t know if it will be great.
Playing house is a long ways away from the “enjoy him while I have him” vision I had planned. I want him and Ace to bond and have a relationship. What I don’t want is to become dependent and hooked to a situation that’s bound to fail.
And if last night was any indication, this is going to leave me completely and utterly screwed . . . in more ways than one.
Twenty-six
“He what?” Vonnie damn near shouts, drawing the attention of the table behind her.
“He moved in.” I slide another martini in front of her and a glass of red wine in front of Charli. “Last Monday.”
“Last Monday?” Now Charli’s shouting. “As in seven full days ago and you’re just now telling us?”
“It all happened really fast.” I shrug, not wanting to go into full detail in a room full of strangers.
“She just told you about TK?” Sadie slides her rhinestone-encrusted butt onto the barstool next to Vonnie, pointing a hot-pink acrylic nail my way. “Did she tell you about the maybe stalker she has?”
“What?” Vonnie and Charli scream in unison.
I narrow my eyes at Sadie before turning to both Vonnie and Charli. “I don’t have a stalker.” I try to calm them down. “I know you just met her, but Sadie is very dramatic. Always keep that in mind when listening to one of her stories.”