“Do any of you think I look at other males too much?” she asked blandly as they rounded the corner and saw her.
“No,” Mat answered immediately, kissing her forehead as he passed her to go into the kitchen.
“Nah. You are who ya are. If anythin’, take more males. As many as ya want because it only makes it a bigger community for us. Some like those really small families, but if ya want a big one, that’s fine.” He sat next to her, smiling.
“Luykas?” she eyed her challenging, dominant husband, who seemed the most uncomfortable with the question.
“As long as I have space to get away sometimes,” he said carefully. “We’re not just talking about Zayden, are we?”
“For now, we are,” she said enigmatically. “I like the way males look. Zayden teased me about it since he caught me staring at Emerian. He’s interesting looking. I can’t help it.”
“Ah…” Luykas sighed. “So, five. We’re looking at possibly five. There have been bigger mayaras. Once, we had a queen who had ten males and five children. She was also known to have a couple of lovers who didn’t want to be in her immediate family but hung around in case she was interested in them at one point or another.”
“What’s normal?” She had no real reference. Many females had two or three from what she saw, but nothing about the Andinna right now was normal. They were separated by leagues, and many were enslaved. She wanted to know what was normal before the War.
“A healthy, active female Andinna can attract two to five males in her lifetime. Whether they all stay is up to the family,” Matesh answered, walking back in with a plate, but instead of food, he balanced drinks on it. “Some females only want one, some want a dozen and can’t keep them all because there’re problems between the males. There are no hard and fast rules. How many can fit in your home, and how many can you feed? Can you give them all the attention they need? Do you need a second bedroom? Those questions need to be answered. I bet…” He looked around the house. “If you want to fill this house up with males, you could probably fit four in each bedroom, but you wouldn’t be able to get all of us in the same room.”
“None of you are…jealous?” She was certain there had been some jealousy from Zayden with her staring at Emerian, but none of them seemed to get defensive. Luykas was probably more worried about how crowded things could get.
“We’re in your mayara, and we know you love us as much as we love you,” Luykas said softly. “Another male joining or several is not the problem. If one of us is jealous, that’s something we need to discuss as a family, and normally, it’s rooted in the insecurities of the male feeling jealous. If everyone feels secure, different personalities can work well together.” He gestured around the room. “Look at us now.”
“Aye.” Bryn grabbed a drink and raised it.
“Okay.” She shrugged, happy with their answers. As long as she didn’t upset the males she already loved, she would keep looking. She saw no reason to box herself in, and she refused to stop her eyes from seeing. “Did you know Zayden is leaving with Yenni?”
“No,” Mat said with a growl. “I didn’t. Bryn?” The rogue shook his head. “Luykas?”
“I might have known something, but I wanted him to bring it up to you,” Luykas said, giving her a stare. “There are some things I need to keep to myself as a commander, I wish I could tell you as a husband. He said he didn’t want a fuss. He just wants to get some blood on his morok now that he’s healed and rehabilitated. I couldn’t think of a good reason to say no when Alchan was busy telling him okay. Alchan wouldn’t let us keep him here just because you want him.”
“I know.” Mave accepted he was leaving. She eyed Luykas. “Any other secrets?”
“Many, but none of them are mine to tell,” he said with a sad smile. “You know all of my secrets.”
She reached out and touched his cheek, then turned on her other males. They all settled in, and she took the new drink Mat had prepared for her. Luykas got up and started a better fire as the chilly night came for them, and by the time Zayden walked back in, Bryn was finishing dinner for everyone.
“You didn’t have to start without me,” Zayden grumbled. “I was nearly home.”
“Aye, but yer about to leave, so let me feed ya.” Bryn chuckled and moved around him to put the steaks on the table. “Sit down and be quiet.”
Zayden seemed insulted, but he sat as ordered. Mave watched him for a moment, turning away when he glanced in her direction.
“We’ll help you prepare to leave tonight and see you off in the morning,” Mat promised.
Zayden’s expression was somewhere between an annoyed frown and secretly pleased. The only reason Mave could tell was she knew what his eyes looked like when he was happy.
“You’ll fight hard,” Mave said quietly, tightening a strap on the horse’s tack. “You’re better now than you were before you were injured. You’ll do well.”
“Do you really think so, or are you trying to convince everyone here of it?” he asked, already grouchy. She knew he would be, which was why she had sent her males away before she talked to him. He was anxious to get on the road and go ‘prove he was worthy,’ not that she believed he needed to for any reason. Whatever his specific reason, he didn’t say, but when she looked up at him, she had a feeling. Her heart thumped in her chest quickly.
“I believe it. The Company believes it. Everyone believes it,” she answered. “Yenni is a character, so consider yourself warned if you’ve never spent much time with her before. The gryphons know how to handle aerial combat. They’re smart and fast, and their riders have spent a lot of time in the saddle, so be prepared for a hard fight if you can’t get a fast kill. If you—”
“I know how to go on a mission,” he growled. “You don’t need to do this.”
“I want to,” she growled back. “Damn it, Zayden, you’ve lived with me since last fall. It’s been three seasons. You’re a member of the Company, you’re a member of the family, and you’re my…friend.” She had to quickly throw in ‘friend’ before she told him he was her male. He was about to go fight. If she jumped on him now, he could possibly spend the next few weeks distracted. She couldn’t have that.
“You’ll fight, you’ll come back, and if there’s anything I can tell you that will make that more likely, I will. I’ll miss your cooking, and you make better tea than any of them, and who is going to keep an eye on Rain if you don’t come back?”
“You are,” he answered, yanking the reins of his horse to pull away from her. “You’ll look after Rain. I know you will.”
She nodded, accepting that. The fact he trusted her with the life of his son was an honor.
“Yeah, I will,” she promised softly. “Fight well.”
He nodded in return, then turned his horse away and rode away.
Luykas, Bryn, and Mat came up around her after the grumpy father was gone from their sight.
“He’ll be back,” Mat whispered, kissing her cheek. “All we can do is train while he’s gone, so we’re ready for his return.”
“Of course,” she agreed.
Turning together, they headed back for their home. Mave knew the summer would be long, but she was ready for it.
32
Zayden
They were in position and ready to strike. The unit had moved fast, and Zayden was glad for Mave’s warning. Yenni was a character.
“Stumpy,” she whispered from her position. “Psst, Stumpy.”
“That’s not my name,” he growled back. “And there’s no reason to be quiet. We have no sight or sign of the Elvasi yet from any of our positions.” They had taken over the side of the cliff and had been there for three days already. Every day, someone had to go out and put down a fresh scent. Every night, they all waited for battle. No one came.
“We’re close to their camp. There’s no reason to think they wouldn’t have arrived yet,” Yenni said softly, almost sounding bored. “But I wanted to ask you about something.”
> “What?”
“How was it training with Mave every day?”
Zayden frowned, considering the question, and it struck him as odd. “You trained with her every day, along with all the other females who wanted to stay in the Spine,” he said, wondering what she was getting at.
“Yes, but she directs the females most of the time and only spars with us sometimes. I’ve never trained with her,” Yenni countered. “You spent morning after morning training with her. She would tell me she didn’t need much sparring practice because she was already getting it with you.”
“She’s intense,” he finally answered. “Even when she’s joking around with a sword, every move is purposeful. She’s always planning her next attack or trying to bait one out from her opponent. She grew up fighting one-on-one combat, groups that outnumbered her, or even beasts. She’s thoughtful with a blade in her hands.” He thought more about it before adding something else. “If you want to beat her, piss her off just enough for her to get sloppy, but not so much that she grows cold. When she’s cold, she’ll kill you, training session or not.”
“Have you ever seen her get sloppy before?”
“No,” he answered honestly, but he had heard of it happening, especially with the stupid risks she had taken on her mission with Matesh, Nevyn, and Kian. He didn’t explain further to Yenni, though. “Why are you interested?”
“I’ve never actually seen her in battle, and sometimes, I look at her and…I don’t see it. She’ll look tired or worn out. She seems too mortal to have the stories she does, not that I don’t believe them, but…”
“You want to really test yourself against her,” he said evenly, understanding now. “She’s mortal like the rest of us, but she doesn’t fight like she is. She uses a sword with more confidence than she flies. It’s an extension of her. Her awareness of the world around her when she’s fighting is uncanny.” Unless she’s too focused on one target and makes a terrible mistake. “The night I met her, I watched her do something I had never seen before. We were being chased by Elvasi calvary. They were closing in on us, and Mave jumped off the horse and turned on them. Mat followed her lead, of course. They were already madly in love. Rain and I readied last, but she was the first to prepare, so she was the closest. Without seeming even remotely worried, she allowed two of the calvary riders to come at her, still on their horses at full speed. In one smooth movement, she cut the legs out from under their mounts and made them easy kills. It didn’t stop there, but the boldness of her, the confidence she had, that will always stick with me. At that moment, she was the best warrior I had ever seen and unstoppable.”
“Yet, she’s not…normal for an Andinna,” Yenni pointed out. “Do you think—”
“There’s nothing wrong with her,” he growled, sitting up from his position and grabbing the hilt of his sword, ready to attack if necessary. “Don’t ever imply there is. She’s unique. She’s Mave Lorren, King’s Champion, and has overcome greater odds than many of us will ever experience, and she’s my fucking female.”
Yenni’s audible gasp practically echoed through the area.
Zayden couldn’t relax his tense grip on the hilt of his sword, could barely move as he realized what he had just voiced.
“She’s not…she’s not my female, but she is my friend—”
“Not my business,” Yenni said quickly, not allowing him to correct himself.
He growled as he sat back, getting comfortable again, kicking himself repeatedly.
She wasn’t his female, but he knew he was too far gone to ever get away from her. She invaded everything about his life. She was the person he trusted his son with. She was his confidant about his insecurities, about needing to come here and fight. She saw him while he was at his lowest physically and emotionally, then helped build him back up.
She can’t be mine until I can handle my other problems. I need to prove I’m a warrior and will always be one. For myself, as selfish as that is. Training is one thing, but a mission, spilling blood, and battling for my life is something that has been a part of my identity for so long.
He also didn’t know if she was serious. He had lived with them for so long, he figured it would be a good idea to move out for a time. Maybe some distance from her would give them both a chance to really consider whatever was swirling between them. He’d stopped trying to deny it a long time ago. She was interested in him now. Her behavior proved it. Zayden could be dense, but he wasn’t that dense.
“Does she know?” Yenni finally asked. “Does Mave know you’re one of her males?”
“Probably,” he answered truthfully. “She treats me like I am.”
“Ah, but nothing has been formally decided. Why are you here, then? Why aren’t you back with them, waiting to go out with their group? You’re assigned to them.”
“I wanted to do this for me,” he explained, sighing. “I’ve been injured since Kerit, and now that we’re fighting again, I wanted to get some experience. I needed to remind myself this is what I love to do.”
“Is it?” Yenni asked softly. “I love to be a warrior, and seeing the blood of my enemies soak the ground is satisfying, but I wouldn’t say I love this…this constant fight for survival.”
He didn’t respond, and they went back to waiting in silence.
As dawn broke, he left his hiding spot and went into one of the small caverns they were using for cover. The days had proved safe so far, but he wasn’t foolish enough to believe they always would be. He was first watch, so he quickly ate a piece of jerky as three other males came in and nestled down for sleep, then he walked back out to the mouth of the cavern.
He was alone outside. Yenni was already gone, off making sure the tracks were fresh for the Elvasi to find. They didn’t do anything too obvious, but they wanted their scents caught, but so far, nothing had happened. For three days, they had seen nothing from the Elvasi, which made Zayden uncomfortable.
They should have found us by now. There’s no reason they haven’t unless their patrols are that bad.
Over two weeks before, he had left the village, excited for this mission, but now, he was growing anxious. He wanted to do something, even if it would be called stupid later. He was out on the mission to prove he could still be a warrior, and he refused to go home without doing that.
They only had four days left to try. They were only given provisions to last one week on their own in enemy territory before they needed to turn back and head home.
“You look pissed,” Yenni said, landing next to him, back from her duties.
“I am. Where are they? We could have hit them and left already.” He and the Company had done assaults before. Ambushes were fine, but a real assault would be more impactful.
“I don’t know,” she said softly. “Maybe you and a couple of the others can set out on a small scouting mission. Keep low, and if you get found out, fly right back to us, and we’ll handle it. It would satisfy the mission, and you might learn something.”
“I like that idea,” he said carefully, nodding. It wasn’t an assault like he craved, but it would get him off his ass and out there, looking for the enemy, wherever they were fucking around. “I’ll pick three others, and we’ll head out tonight.”
“Good idea.” Yenni nodded once, then yawned. “Now, it’s time for me to get some shut-eye. Make sure you sleep well before you go out tonight.”
Zayden nodded silently, and when his replacement came, he went inside the small cave and forced himself to sleep. They were going off the plan tonight, and he had to be well-rested.
Zayden stood with the three males he had chosen at the mouth of the cave when Yenni came out and looked them over.
“You’ll head back at dawn,” she said, as much a commander as Zayden figured she was. He had seen her in action, leading the females through training exercises. She had the imposing nature Mave sometimes had when she said something and left no room for male argument. “If this fails, you won’t be going out a second time. We’ll just
hope we get some action before heading back to the valley and going home. Are we clear?”
“Of course, Yenni.” He wasn’t stupid enough to tell her she was playing too cautious.
“Good. Now, get going before I change my mind. If this goes wrong, Alchan will have my fucking hide. I like it attached to my body, so nothing can go wrong.”
He chuckled and jumped up, glad to be leaving the cliffside they had camped on for four days with no success. He was going to find their enemy and bring them back or find a place Yenni could draw up an attack for. Anything was better than what they’d had for four days.
He turned south and flew fast and low, knowing his chosen warriors followed him. He wasn’t close with any of them, but he had made sure none were previous gladiators. He didn’t want to go home, giving any glory to one of the males who once tormented Mave. He saw the shadows in her eyes when they were mentioned. He would never work closely with any of those males. Zayden had to hide the bad taste in his mouth over one of them becoming Alchan’s advisor. He didn’t care if Kenav was Alchan’s maternal cousin and of noble birth—he was also a known gladiator ringleader.
Maybe I’m too biased, thanks to Mave. The gladiators haven’t done anything too stupid yet, and they’re stronger warriors than what we have coming north from the Empire right now. We won’t see Sen with Andinna from Olost until the fall, at the earliest. We knew this summer would be one of the harder ones. At least there are no large engagements happening like Kerit, even with Lothen’s forces down here on the south side of the Spine.
He landed on a cliffside at the edge of the next valley, looking around in confusion. Below him was a dark camp. By foot, there seemed like only one way north out of the valley unless they wanted to climb. There were only a handful of gryphons in the camp from what Zayden could see. Nowhere near enough to do a patrol and fight with Andinna units. This camp wasn’t set up for that, which bothered Zayden greatly. That meant something.
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