“Good girl.” He mutters so quietly I’m the only one who can hear it as he hands my sweater over.
“Marina, I have dough in the proofer,” I say, sad to abandon my challah.
“I’ll take care of it so it’s ready to bake when you come back for class later,” she says.
Connor puts his arm around my shoulders and guides me out of the culinary classroom.
We walk in silence through the hall for a minute before he stops. “We’ll start tomorrow. You shouldn’t have done what you did back there, the lunch room. You just butted in and…” He pushes out a harsh breath. “I got caught up, but I didn’t mean to make you cry.” His jaw clenches. “Clean slate?”
As if I could forget everything? Yeah, right.
Worst of all, if he really needed my help—before he broke my heart—I would have helped him out, no questions asked because that’s the kind of person I am.
I huff, crossing my arms. “Are you kidding? You treated me like shit.”
“I’m apologizing for it,” he growls, turning cold gray eyes on me. “I don’t have to. Would you rather I do business as usual and apply pressure until it hurts you even more? Don’t forget, I’m the one with all the leverage.”
A shiver runs down my spine. “It’s a crappy apology. Are you going to spread my photos around?”
“No. As long as our deal stands.”
I can’t believe him. I’ve spent the last half hour sick out of my mind worrying my private photos would be all over school by the end of the day. But for whatever reason, he needs me.
Everything is on Connor’s whim. This world is one where he does whatever—gets whatever he wants, and the rest of us simply exist to bend to his will.
“You’re not forgiven for being an ass,” I say, pushing his arm off my shoulder and walking away.
“Where do you think you’re going?”
“Away from you.” I turn my head just enough to see him from the corner of my eye. “Until tomorrow, when this dog and pony show starts.”
He stares for a beat, then snorts and shakes his head. Turning around, he heads in the opposite direction.
“See you tomorrow, little mouse. Be ready.”
Eleven
Thea
By be ready, Connor meant he’d be blocking my driveway in the morning, his dark silver Lexus GX idling as he waited for me, one hand resting over the top of the wheel as I stood there like an idiot.
He’s throwing me in the deep end and we haven’t even talked about the details. I wasn’t inclined to message him anytime soon, so I thought he might find me before school to go over our…agreement. This is ridiculous and frustrating me to no end.
I stay rooted in my driveway, hoping Mom isn’t peeking out the window for one of her random checks because I can’t explain to her what I don’t understand myself yet.
“Let’s go!” Connor shouts through the open window, gesturing like what as he squints at me. “We’re gonna be late if you don’t get in the car.”
“I didn’t ask for a ride.” I nod to my blue Mini Cooper. “I have my own car.”
Connor snorts. “That is a doll car. Get in, now.”
My lips purse. Damn him. He can’t control me!
But he’s right, we can’t keep arguing or we’ll be late. Groaning under my breath, I climb into the front seat, dumping my bag by my feet. The car smells like him—earthy and woodsy with hints of spice. It envelops me, making my stomach flip over in a weird way.
“Don’t think this will be a regular thing. When are we going over the rules? I’m totally making this one of them.”
“We will.” He reaches out with his free hand after he pulls away from the curb, taking mine and threading our fingers together. I go still, surprised he wants to hold my hand when there’s no one around to put on our act for. “And I am. Boyfriends drive their girlfriends to school. Can’t look like a bad boyfriend leaving you stranded.”
A sardonic laugh bursts from me. Connor tips his head to peer at me.
“Stranded? Please, I can drive myself. You humiliated me yesterday in front of your friends and made fun of my sweater, now you’re holding my hand like you’re sweet?” I yank my hand free and tuck it beneath my thigh so he can’t get at it. I smooth my green plaid uniform skirt with my other hand, then prop my elbow against the door, resting my head in my palm. “You’re still not forgiven. I’m only here because you’re blackmailing me. I wouldn’t come near you otherwise.”
“You certainly were ready to come all over me before.” The glare I direct at him drops the temperature in the car by a few degrees. He blows out a slow, strained breath and grips the wheel with both hands. “Okay. Whatever. Noted.”
We ride in silence for a long stretch. The drive to school isn’t long, and I realize I’m wasting a good opportunity for the details I’m desperate for.
“So what’s our deal? Or rather, your deal that I have no choice but to accept because the alternative is…yeah, no thanks. Asshole.” I shift a little to face him better as we drive through Ridgeview, turning onto the tree-lined road that leads up to the school. “When did we get together? How did it happen?”
Connor cuts a look at me from the corner of his eye. “We’ll keep it simple so it’s easy to remember. We’ve grown up as neighbors. Got together over summer or something. You’re the girl next door, what’s not to like about that?”
I frown as he hitches a shoulder. “That’s unimaginative.”
Amusement crosses his face. “We could always use the true version: you sent me a wrong number nude and I was like aight.”
“You ass! We are not using that. And I wasn’t naked.”
“Yet. Shortly after?” Connor hums, shifting in the driver’s seat. “So gloriously naked.”
With a scandalized squeal, I swat his arm, overwhelmed by his proximity and what he’s saying. He drives me to things I never do.
He laughs. The corner of his mouth tugs up in a crooked grin as he turns the wheel with the heel of his palm, entering the student parking lot.
“You want a whirlwind romance, or something? I’m just trying to make it easy. It’s not like it’s real.”
The words slice me and I suck in a pained gasp.
It’s not real.
Right.
For as big as his SUV is, I’m suffocated by being so near to him while my emotions spiral.
Connor is my first actual boyfriend, but it’s all fake. I stare at my lap.
“Is it cool if I drop you off here?”
I look up, blinking out of my depressing thoughts. He took the loop that cuts off from the student lot for pick ups and drop offs up the hill where the school stands flanked by tall pine trees. His friends gather in the parking lot at the base of the hill. Devlin Murphy’s flashy red sports car stands out like a beacon, and a few people gather around it as he leans against the side.
We didn’t get to cover much on the ride. Not knowing what to anticipate being Connor’s puppet is grating on me.
“Don’t want to be seen with your nerdy girlfriend? Too big of a dent to your shiny popular soccer captain image? I thought that was the whole point of this.” The acidic bite in my voice surprises me.
“I, no,” Connor says, furrowing his brow. He drags his fingers through his messy light brown hair. “I just thought—because of yesterday. I didn’t think you’d want to show up with me yet.”
The hot and cold nature of his cruelty and his unexpected consideration is giving me whiplash.
“Okay.” I’m ready to escape the car anyway. I pop the door handle and grab my bag from the floor. “Thanks. Bye, I guess.”
His voice halts me when I turn to join the flow of students making their way into school. “Wait for me after homeroom. We’ll walk together to first period.”
My brows wrinkle in confusion as I spin to face him. “We don’t have first period together.”
“The way to your first class has the most foot traffic. We’ll get the rumor mill going early and b
y lunch they’ll all have heard about it. You should sit at my table today.”
“Uh, yeah, no. No thank you.”
Did he forget the point he made about my discomfort with his friends? Or do guys just get over stuff that easily and he thinks I’ll be dandy by lunch?
His expression darkens. “Yes.”
“No.” I fold my arms over the open window, lifting on my tiptoes to reach. “I already have standing lunch plans every day with my friends. And yours are very rude, so. That’s that.”
Connor releases an aggravated sound. “Just be in the hall after homeroom.”
He pulls off before I can say anything.
I won’t be waiting around for him. He needs to apologize to me for real to make up for yesterday before I play the perfect doting girlfriend. I only got in the SUV because I didn’t want to be late.
After I part ways with Maisy at the end of lunch, a hand clamps on my arm from behind and a dark voice growls in my ear, making me yelp in the empty covered walkway between the north and south buildings.
“Somewhere you forgot to be?”
I toss an unimpressed look over my shoulder as my stomach clenches. “I told you I wasn’t eating lunch with you.”
He squeezes my arm. “I’m talking about this morning. We’ll have to do it all over again tomorrow morning. Or—” My body collides with his chest as he spins me around to face him “—we take more drastic measures. Hold still.”
Before I register what’s happening, Connor tips my chin up, presses his forehead to mine, and holds his other arm up. He flicks his eyes to the side to check, then I hear the digital click sound of his camera. He keeps his piercing eyes locked on mine and kisses my cheek. I gasp, pushing against his chest. His arm is like an iron band around me as he licks my damn cheek like an animal, snapping away.
“What—are—you—doing?” With each word I struggle against him.
He chuckles against my temple, the deep and raspy sound unfairly making arousal pulse in my core, reminding me of the recorded voice texts where he’d say filthy things to me in the heat of the moment.
I push away from him, tucking my hair behind my ears to give myself a second to gather my wits.
“And,” Connor drawls. “Posted. Hashtag bae. Better follow me back, or that’ll look weird.”
Annoyed, I whip out my phone and sure enough, I have a new follower notification on Instagram, a friend request on Facebook, and a photo tag with @BigBadBishop. Clicking on the post, I find three photos on a carousel. The first one where he kissed my cheek steals my breath for a moment because of how much we look like an actual couple. Then a sigh of relief hisses out of me. He didn’t post the one where he licked my cheek.
“Why didn’t we just do that in the first place?” I ask. “Seems a lot easier.”
“Because my way was more organic. There are algorithms to fight against for visibility. Plus, photos can be doctored.”
“If they can, I’ll just say that it’s not me in the ones you have.” I cross my arms. “Easy peasy, we can go our separate ways.”
Connor’s smile isn’t a genuine one, more like an evil shark’s, marring his handsome face. That angelic face of his is a big fat lie. “Everyone knows I’m better than that. I’d never be so amateur that I’d spread something photoshopped. The secrets I collect are the real deal, baby.”
The second bell rings, signaling that we’re both late to class. He takes my wrist and tugs me into the north building, dragging me back to the same empty science lab.
“Do you ever go to class?” I ask, fighting back the memory of the last time we were in here together.
“You keep begging me to have this chat, so here we are.” He pulls out a stool and perches on it, propping his heel on the bar. “This is your one and only reminder: you agreed, so you have to play along. No more ghosting on me if I tell you to be somewhere.” He ruffles his hair, making it stick up a little, giving him a more boyish look. “What you have to do isn’t even hard, just be seen with me and shit for credibility.”
He makes me so mad. I’m normally level-headed. But around him? I grind my teeth and stalk up to him. Even seated on the stool, he’s taller than me, but I don’t let it stop me. I refuse to let him scare me as I poke my finger into his chest.
“Listen here, Bishop,” I say firmly, using the name everyone calls him, “I might have agreed, but I want a real apology for yesterday before we go any further with this ruse. First you shatter my entire world with the truth, then you blackmail me, then the lunchroom! You hurt my feelings and I don’t think I can stand to be around you whether you force me to or not until you make some kind of effort to treat me like I deserve to be treated.”
In my head, my inner goddess is snapping and clapping at me for getting that out without my voice cracking.
Connor stares at me, his lips working, unsure how to respond. “You are…” He clears his throat, the wonder shrinking back into the shadows behind his mask. His voice hardens. “Something else, huh? I don’t normally apologize to the people I blackmail while I’m doing it, if ever.”
“I’m waiting.”
“It won’t change anything.” His brows draw together. “You’re still on the hook, or I’ll start sending out your photos. I’m serious, Thea. I’m not a nice guy and I will hurt you if you cross me.”
“You can continue as planned. After you give me a good apology. Then I’ll help you.” I hesitate, licking my lips, debating if it helps my case at all to tell him. “I would’ve, you know. Helped you. You didn’t have to use any leverage, just asked and I would’ve.”
It feels good to tell him that. Maybe if he understands who he’s dealing with, he’ll stop acting like a grumpy, controlling ass.
“Is that a trick?” He huffs out a scornful laugh and scratches the back of his head, muttering, “Better not be.”
I lift my brows expectantly. He meets my gaze, unwavering. I’ll wait all day if I have to.
“I’m sorry. Dick move on my part.”
For the first time ever, in all the years I’ve watched Connor from outside of his luminescent bubble of popularity and fortune, he sounds genuine. Human. It’s the small reassurance I need to do this.
“Okay,” I say.
“Okay?”
“Yes. You may continue with your power trip.”
Connor gapes at me, suspicion bleeding into the edges of his expression.
Checking the time on the clock above the door, I frown. If I miss any more of my classes, I’ll be written up and sent to Principal Bishop’s office. Setting my bag down, I pull out a notebook and a pen, prepared to take notes.
“What kind of girlfriend am I supposed to be?”
With a tiny shake of his head, he says, “Like a normal one. Just do whatever you usually do.”
Easy for him to say.
I hold back a sigh. He’s proven he’s dangerous to spill my secrets to. I don’t want to give him another one by admitting I’ve never had a boyfriend—a real, in person one, anyway. Swallowing, I consider my old online boyfriend, even though it was brief. There’s always something that keeps me from counting him.
With my minimal experience, I don’t know how to be in a relationship, pretend or otherwise.
Thoughts fly through my head, whispering to me how I’ll fail at being a fake girlfriend as much as I would a real one. That Connor will find out how pathetic I am and probably destroy me worse for it. The ugly thoughts pick away at me, promising I’ll never be the confident girl in my secret folder, driving away my inner goddess of self-love.
Fake, fake, fake.
Sad.
Unwanted.
My throat burns and I realize the rattling in my ears is my wheezing breaths.
“Are you okay? You look…”
He’ll see it so easily.
Tossing aside my notebook, I close the distance between us in a panic. Connor’s eyes widen as he cups my elbows.
“Just how long do you expect me to put on this song and dance
with you? You never even told me when or how you want me to pretend. Just snap to it whenever you decide without an explanation.”
Yes, I sound crazed. I don’t care.
A bark of laughter drops from Connor’s lips as he looks me up and down. He rises from the stool, herding me back a step.
“That’s enough,” he growls, grabbing my hips and pinning me against a lab table. “This goes until I say so. You’re at my mercy here while I’ve got your dirty little secret in my power.”
Ignoring his alpha male bullshit, I throw my next question at him without missing a beat to stave off the thump of my pulse. The words flood out of me with no way of stopping them when I’m worked up.
“How long is that exactly? I’m not just going to live some indefinite lie with no expiration date when it’s your problem.” While he’s bewildered by my outburst, I wriggle away to pace. “A year? Three years? What about college? What—will it still be going on when we’re in our twenties, and we’ll be faking a marriage and two point five kids? And—”
Connor catches me around the waist, clapping a big hand over my mouth. His gray eyes are full of fascinated exasperation.
“Jesus. Are you some kind of wind up toy?” He removes his hand carefully, like he’s worried I’ll get started again. “What the fuck was all that?”
It’s like I blink back to reality, once he interrupted the flow. My panic has faded in the shock of him grabbing me. I almost smile. Until I remember why we’re here.
“I babble when I’m nervous.” Folding my arms, I shrug. He steps back. “Seriously, Connor. I’m not blindly playing along without an end date. You can’t keep using your leverage over me to keep me in line forever.”
Connor rubs his chin, studying me. I can see the gears in his head turning. “Until graduation, then. We’ll part on friendly terms as we prepare to go to college.”
“That’s it? Then you’ll leave me alone and delete my photos?”
Ruthless Bishop: Dark New Adult High School Bully Romance (Sinners and Saints Book 3) Page 10