by Cara Wylde
“I know you lied to me. You found Katia, and you talked to her. She was the one who told you Valentine’s story, wasn’t she? That whole thing about the dimension twenty years from now, how an older version of myself told you everything… You made that all up. Why?”
Yoli took a couple of calming breaths, closed the book gently, and placed it on her lap. She held my gaze, and to my annoyance, she actually looked composed. Here I was thinking that fear would work as a great motivator, but she didn’t fear me at all.
“You stink,” she said.
That took me aback. If I were an anime character, a huge drop of sweat would’ve been hanging over my head, and my eyes would be doing that spiraling thing that made no sense.
“Like… literally, or…” I managed, stupidly.
Corri flew off my shoulder, letting out a big breath I was unaware she’d been holding all this time.
“She’s right, Mistress. I’m so sorry… I couldn’t tell you, but… Your ex-boyfriends are right. You need to do something about it, and soon.”
I looked at them, confused. “Are you kidding me? I stink. That’s your problem? Let me tell you what my problem is.” I pointed my scythe at Yoli. “You, missy, lied to me. I’ve been nothing but good to you. I asked you to do one thing for me. Just one. Was that too much?”
“You lied to me first. You told me you’re human, but you’re not.”
“And if I’m not human, what do you think I am?”
“I don’t know. But your mother told me that if you can’t dream jump anymore, it means you lost your humanity.”
“You found her…”
“Yes.”
“Why did you lie to me?”
She shrugged. “How could I trust you? You’ve been using me all along. I’m not stupid, I can put two and two together. When Katia told me you must’ve lost your humanity somehow, because otherwise you would’ve dream jumped to her yourself, I realized you’d been taking advantage of me all along. You sent your pixie to find you someone who could dream travel, and she found me. Then you convinced your adoptive parents to take me in, so you could have me at your disposal and send me after your mom and dad.”
“I never told you to go after Morningstar. He’s dangerous.”
“You can’t find Katia Angelov and not run into Valentine Morningstar. Don’t be naïve, Mila.”
“I’m sorry you feel this way.” I couldn’t deny that she was right. That would’ve meant lying to her again. “But it’s a win-win situation, isn’t it? You’re here, you have a family, you’re doing great. And you’re part of something big.”
She thought for a second. I could tell she wasn’t going to contradict me. She did like being part of this whole supernatural business. It definitely beat spending her childhood and teenage years in an orphanage, then facing the world at eighteen – a world that would kick her in the ass at every step.
“Win-win,” she said bitterly. “You could’ve told me the whole truth, and I would’ve helped you anyway. I don’t care if you’re human or not.”
I sighed. My shoulders slumped. I was so tired, but I’d been running from this conversation for too long. I left my scythe by the door and plopped onto the bed.
“What I am, Yoli… I didn’t want you to know. I couldn’t tell you.”
“Why not. What are you, anyway? Did something bite you and you’re a vampire or a werewolf?” She came to sit next to me, but quickly scrambled away, holding her nose.
“Sorry.”
“You need a shower.”
“A shower won’t help. I’m a revenant. Undead. Last year, Morningstar managed to kill me.”
“You told me he can’t.”
“He didn’t do it himself. He paid an Unseelie mercenary. I was dead for three days. They buried me in the forest outside the Academy. My friends found me, dug me up, and…” I hated this part, especially because I had to tell her about the Great Old One, and I’d hoped with all my heart that I’d never have to drag her into this disgusting story. I’d hoped that Yolanda would never have to know about the monster. “Are you sure you want to hear this? You won’t be able to unhear it.”
She nodded, and I told her everything, made it as short and as quick as I could, gave her minimal details. But even without the details, facts were facts. There was a terrible being living underneath the Academy, and it had the power to bring the dead back to life. In exchange for immortality, it required blood sacrifices every three or four months, and I’d already stretched my deadline too thin.
“So, that’s why I stink. Happy now?”
“You’re dying…”
“Yeah. In a very physical sense.”
She was silent for a while, and I respected her silence. It would’ve been hard for anyone to wrap their mind around the whole thing, and she was only eleven.
“Do mom and dad know?”
“No.”
She nodded, and I hoped she understood why they never had to know.
“I’m sorry this happened to you. It wasn’t your choice, and now you have to deal with it.” I nodded. For a kid, her wisdom impressed me much too often. “It’s not your fault. I mean, I can see why you don’t want to shout from the rooftops that you’re a revenant, but you shouldn’t hide it either. From your loved ones, at least.”
“Being a revenant means keeping the secret. There are few of us, and not many people know. I’m talking about supernaturals. The Council knows, as well as a very small circle of trusted friends. It’s the way it has to be. Otherwise, they would shun us. What we’re doing to stay alive and immortal is horrible.”
“I’m glad I’m part of that small circle of trusted friends.”
She smiled, and I smiled back. Well, that had been easier than I thought, and I felt like a burden had been lifted off my shoulders. The vise grip on my heart loosened up a bit.
“Your turn,” I said. “Katia.”
She dragged in a deep breath and blew out her cheeks.
“Where do I start… I found her some weeks ago. She was actually the one who taught me how to better navigate the dimensions and find the exact one I’m looking for on first try. Before her, it was hard for me to return to a dimension I’d already discovered. It usually took me at least three or four nights to find my way back. She showed me how to fixate on solid reference points, and I started noting them down in a diary.” She went to her desk drawer and pulled out a pink notebook. It looked so cute and girlie… No one would’ve thought it contained crucial information about inter-dimensional travel. “So, I visited her a couple of times after that.”
It hurt to hear it. That someone else had seen and talked to my mother so many times, and I was trapped here.
“She asked me about you and why you haven’t come to see her after that one time. I didn’t know what to tell her. I thought you weren’t a great dream traveler, but your mom told me you were one of the most gifted in the family. She’d been worried sick. She thought you were dead. Well… now I know she wasn’t far from the truth.”
“Wait a second.” It suddenly dawned on me. “If she knows how to return to dimensions she’s visited before, then she knows how to get back here.”
“She does. She spent years dream jumping and mapping the parallel universes. When she finally found her way back, she realized she couldn’t return for good. She didn’t have a body here anymore. So, she gave up. When you were little, she watched over you from the shadows. She never dared to come up to you and tell you the truth because she thought it was better for you to live a normal life. Later, she stopped visiting because it was too painful to watch from a distance as you went to school, made friends, and built a life where there was no place for her. She was happy to know that you had a family and a chance at a decent, average life – something she never had in this dimension. And anyway, she fell in love with the man your father had delivered her to. Oh, you wanted to know how it was possible for your mom to switch places with a version of herself
that had long passed away.”
My ears perked. “How?”
“It appears the Valentine Morningstar in that dimension truly is the best version of your father in all the parallel universes. When his wife died, he asked a mage to make her a special coffin that would preserve her body in perfect condition. That’s why it worked. Basically, your mother’s consciousness entered a body that was as fresh as the day the soul had left it.”
“Wow! I would’ve never thought of that. Smart.”
Yoli shook her head. “It wasn’t that. It was love. He adored her so much that he couldn’t stand to bury her or burn her body. He was rewarded by getting her back. Well, at least another version of her.”
“And she fell in love with him…”
“Why not? He’s amazing. I met him. He’s kind, and wise, and so gentle with everyone. Honestly, I don’t understand how his other versions, including your father, are the complete opposite of him. She’s happy, you know.”
I swallowed heavily. “I’m glad. She deserves it. What else?”
“She told me your father’s story, but you already know that.”
“Did she tell you anything that might help us retire him?”
Yolanda shook her head. “She has no idea what he’s up to, let alone how to stop him. I’m sorry.”
“But she still talks to him! Morningstar ambushed me at the Unholy Chapel today. He knew about you, and he knew you talked to my mother. She told him herself! He said he still visits her.”
“He didn’t use to, but since you dream jumped and found her, he’s been checking up on her more often. He probably pissed her off, otherwise she wouldn’t have given us away.”
“If she’s in danger because of me…”
“She’s not. Her husband would never let anything happen to her.”
I smiled. It warmed my heart to know that at least she got her happily-ever-after.
“Mila,” Yoli reached over and took my hand in hers. “I’m going to find him for you. I promise. I’m going to figure out what he wants.”
“Don’t. He’s going to eat you whole and spit you out. And I’ll never live with myself after that. Leave Morningstar to me.”
“What will you do?”
“I have no idea.”
“I want you to become a Grim Reaper. And when my time comes, at age one hundred and one, maybe you’ll come for my soul.” She laughed.
I punched her playfully in the shoulder. “You don’t want to see the face of a Violent Reaper before you die, trust me.”
But maybe she wouldn’t have to see the face of a Grim Reaper at all. I’d given Yolanda a family, an adventure, and I felt like it wasn’t enough. She deserved more. She deserved to live forever. Damn it. I’m starting to get ideas…
CHAPTER TWENTY-TWO
Time had run out. Graduation was taking place in the dining hall, which had once again been converted to suit our needs. The dais where the professor’s table stood was empty now and turned into a stage. Parents and family members were sitting around beautifully decorated tables and waited for the ceremony to start. There would be a party after.
My parents weren’t here, and neither were Sariel’s. Stepan and Lena had insisted to come, but I’d managed to convince them to stay at home with Yolanda.
“I’m nervous as it is,” I’d told them. “Trust me, this isn’t a day of joy for me. It’s more like the day I’m going to find out if I failed or not. And if I did fail, I don’t want you there to see it.”
Also, I didn’t want them here to stare into my greenish face – I was doing my best to cover the color of impending death with tons of foundation and concealer, – and see how my blue hair was falling in clumps. I looked like a zombie. No matter how much GC, Pazuzu, Sariel, Francis, and even Corri had begged me to go through with the ritual again, I’d refused. I wasn’t going to sacrifice another soul to the Great Old One. Not even if Paz brought me the most wretched soul in the world. Not even if he brought me the Devil himself. I was done feeding the monster. And if I had to rot on my feet and turn into a puddle of goo and bones, then so be it. Fine. It was either a place among the twenty-two Grim Reapers, or nothing.
Headmaster Colin started to call out names. Of course, we all graduated. No one ever failed Grim Reaper Academy, because only the brightest minds were accepted in the first place. The moment of truth would come later, when the headmaster would announce the new generation of Grim Reapers. Those were the first twenty-two students on the scoreboard. I was among them. But that didn’t mean anything. Not in my case.
“Klaus Severinus Hamelin. Mage. Merciful Death. Come here, please.”
Klaus stepped forward, and Headmaster Colin handed him his scythe. Only the ones who’d become Grim Reapers could have their scythes back. Standing on the stage, in my flowery dress and long, black robe, I felt uncomfortable without mine.
“Lorna Chiaramonte. Mage. Righteous Death.”
Lorna winked at me. “See you on the other side.”
“Francis Saint-Germain. Violent Death.”
It was funny how Headmaster Colin didn’t mention what Francis was. He knew, of course. But what would he have said? Revenant? Undead? Zombie? The tiny, seemingly unintentional slip went unnoticed.
“Merrit Castegny. Mage. Violent Death.”
Damn it. He made it, but Caspian didn’t. How is that fair? Caspian was a mage, too, and a much nicer person than stupid Merrit.
“Pandora Darkmoor. Demoness. Neutral Death.”
Even now, I couldn’t understand how Pandora had been placed in the Neutral Death Cabal. There was literally nothing neutral about her.
“GC Apis. False god. Violent Death.”
GC pumped his fist in the air. I laughed, and I wasn’t the only one. At least he was excited. Earlier, Francis had accepted his scythe from Headmaster Colin like he’d accepted a death sentence. Well, in a way, it was a two-hundred-year sentence, and it had everything to do with death.
“Pazuzu Eremus. Demon. Violent Death.”
Paz threw me a charming smile and went to collect his scythe. It was almost over, and they knew it. They were looking forward to it. Once we’d all take our places as Grim Reapers, we could be together again.
“Sheba Hellflame. Demoness. Righteous Death.”
Kitty and Sammy didn’t make it.
“Raziel Celest. Angel. Violent Death.” A pause. “Sariel Gracewing. Fallen One. Violent Death.”
The very first Fallen One in history to become a Grim Reaper. If anything, Sariel should have been proud of himself. When all odds were against him, he’d just worked harder and made it. I hated his parents for having refused to come and bear witness to his success.
Headmaster Colin called out a few more names until he finally got to me. I was the last one.
“Mila Morningstar. Human. Violent Death.”
Human. Yeah, sure. The second I stepped closer to him and he gave me my scythe, his twitching nose said I was no human at all. Frankly, I’d tried to cover the stench of death with a fuckton of perfume, but it hadn’t quite worked. I found a place between Francis and Lorna. Francis had the best poker face in the world, and Lorna… I just wanted to piss her off.
“Jesus, woman!”
“You know you love me,” I chuckled.
“Feast and party,” Headmaster Colin said, addressing the guests, the professors, and the newly graduated students, then turned to us. “Your job is not done yet.” He motioned for us to gather around him in a perfect circle. “I will take you now to the Great Hall of Life and Death, where you will…” He hesitated, and I wondered if it was because of me. “Well, you know what you’ll have to do.”
He lifted his right hand above his head, made a swirly motion, and a cloud of shimmering energy fell upon us. That was how a powerful mage with centuries of experience teleported twenty-two people and himself to a place no one could point on any map.
I felt slightly dizzy. Everyone else was fine, so I
knew it was because of my poor health. I also hadn’t eaten in days, my body finding it more and more difficult to digest and process food. I basically lived on water. I leaned on Francis’s arm and looked around me.
We were in a long hall with a tall ceiling and pillars on both sides. It led to a door in the far back – the only one in sight. Headmaster Colin started walking toward it, and we followed him. The walls were covered in detailed tapestries that depicted humans and supernaturals at various stages in life. Here, a baby was born. There, a man and a woman were getting married. Strong men were working the fields, and curvy women clattered about in small kitchens, children and cats pulling at their skirts. A little farther, an old man was begging a cloaked figure with a scythe to give him more time. But the scenes weren’t all rural. There were people in tall office buildings, and people in cars, some driving happily on long, winding streets, others smashed in terrible accidents. Heaven and Hell were depicted, too. Choirs of angels sang songs of praise, and demons schemed and plotted how to release chaos into the world above. I saw the Seelie and the Unseelie courts, each with their births, marriages, and deaths. The whole universe was painted on these walls, and for a moment, my greatest sadness was that I couldn’t stop to take it all in. I felt like the meaning of all things was hidden behind these images, if only I could halt, decide that I didn’t need to know what was behind the door we were headed for, and study each and every detail for hours. Unable to help myself, I lingered. I was the last one to arrive at the door, which Headmaster Colin opened, and I could barely see over my colleagues’ heads.
The room was large and empty, aside from the wide chair in the middle, which was occupied by two people covered in shrouds. I couldn’t tell whether they were men or women. One had a black shroud, and the other a white one. What caught my attention was that the two pieces of flowy fabric overlapped where the two people’s shoulders touched. They were sitting very close together. In front of them, facing us, were the twenty-two Grim Reapers whose places we were going to take. I counted again. Twenty-one. Morningstar wasn’t here. My heart sank and my knees almost gave out.