Pushing open my apartment door, I head straight for the couch and set my book bag on the floor beside me. I pull out my neonatal textbooks, my notebooks, and an assortment of pens and highlighters and get to work. Before I dive in, I turn on the TV to mute and scroll through the channels, lucking out when I see the Sox game is playing on one of them.
Getting used to a new city and new channels is such a bitch. I mean, why can’t every TV just be programmed the same?
Check your privilege, Lila. Your first world problems are showing again.
There’s a knock on my door and I get up, peeking out of the peephole and seeing nothing but a box of pizza. I didn’t order any, but I’m not above stealing someone else’s dinner right now. Desperate times and all. Plus, I think I ate my last protein bar for breakfast.
When I pull open the door, the pizza box lowers and I’m grateful to see my sometimes-friend Leo behind the food. “Thought you could use a pick-me-up.”
I snag the pizza from out of his hands. “God bless you.” He follows me inside and I kick the door shut before heading into the kitchen to grab plates and a couple drinks.
“Ugh,” he groans and I look back at him, his face contorted in annoyance. “Do we have to watch this?”
“Yes, my boyfriend is pitching tonight.” I toss him a soda which I’m grateful he catches because I’m not in the mood to clean up a spill tonight.
“I thought you’d be going out tonight. A few other girls in the building were going out and said they were nursing majors.” He shrugs and lifts open the pizza box to display the decadent pepperoni bliss.
The truth is, I haven’t made very many friends since school started. And by very many, I mean any. Aside from Leo, of course. I’m basically a contestant on The Bachelor—I’m not here to make friends.
“Not my scene.” It’s true. I only went to parties before because Bridget or Phoebe forced me to. With neither of them here, I don’t have any reason to go out. It’s not like I’m looking for a boyfriend; I already got me one of those.
“You can’t stay cooped up in here forever. Trust me, these will be the hardest couple of years of your life. You need friends. At the very least, you need study buddies. I can be your friend, but I don’t know anything about medicine.”
He’s probably right, but I’m incredibly stubborn and self-sufficient. I’ll take my chances for now.
“Why aren’t you going out?” I turn the tables on him because I feel like I’m always the one doing the talking when we’re together.
“Well, there’s this crazy girl on my floor. She thinks she’s dating a major league baseball player and frankly, I need to keep an eye on her to make sure she doesn’t harm herself or others. She’s a bit of a wild card.”
“Shut up.” I kick his shin and unbothered, I take a huge bite of my pizza while he rubs away the pain.
“Okay, just humor me. Watch this video and tell me this isn’t the type of ‘relationship’”—he says with air quotes— “you have with your Red Sox player.”
Pulling out his phone, he searches for something and then sets the device down on the table in front of me. “So, this is Mac and that’s Dee and Mac also has an interesting connection to a ballplayer, a former Phillie, Chase Utley.”
I watch the video where a grown ass man sends an incredibly childish and pretty weird ‘love’ letter to a baseball player to an obsessive degree. I can’t roll my eyes enough watching this weird video with these weird ass people.
“First of all, what the hell is this?” I look over and Leo is laughing at the video. I’m missing something.
“I really gotta get you to watch It’s Always Sunny. But there you have it. Did you see a bit of yourself in that video, Lila? You can be honest with me.”
“Dude, no, I’m serious. I am not the Mark character and Hollis is not the baseball player.”
“It’s Mac, and Chase Utley was one of the best Phillies players of all time.” We’re moving into bromance territory here and it’s getting weird.
“Just look at my phone.” I scroll through and find my pictures I have with Hollis, but he doesn’t seem amused.
“Please, this one even looks photoshopped. You could’ve done a better job.”
“Whatever.” I pick up my phone and call Hollis, knowing he’s not going to answer, but I’m good with leaving him a message. “Hey, babe, it’s me,” I emphasize for dramatic effect, even though, really, I could be calling anyone, but I’m not and I’ll prove it to Leo. “Call me back when you can. I want to talk playoff tickets with you. Love you, bye.” I stick my tongue out at my friend. “I’ll show you. If the Phillies and the Sox end up in the playoffs together, I’ll get us tickets to the game.”
Leo laughs but I’m missing the joke. “I’m not holding my breath.”
“Well, you could, because we’re gonna get those tickets. Also, I am a nursing major, so I could resuscitate you.” He quirks a brow and I shrug. “Got it, not the point.” I eat my pizza and wait for Leo to eat his words.
TWENTY-SEVEN
Lila
Turns out there’s a reason Leo was so smug about me getting playoff tickets. Not because I wasn’t able to get them, but the Red Sox don’t play the Phillies in the playoffs since they are part of two separate divisions. Who knew?
Leo knew. And Hollis. And probably most avid baseball fans, but whatever.
Still, I’m going to one-up the hell out of Leo and then he’s going to have to believe me. I don’t know why I’m so fixated on this. I guess because I don’t want to sound like a crazy person and if I can’t even convince Leo I’m dating Hollis, then who will I convince? I’ll be locked up in the psych ward in no time.
I’ve shown Leo countless pictures and what I thought was proof of my relationship, but apparently, and I quote, ‘in a world of Photoshop, you can’t trust anything.’ Smug bastard.
My luck hasn’t run out, though. Unsurprisingly, the Red Sox are set to play at the World Series. They’re American League champions, ready to take on the world. The world of baseball, anyway.
The wildcard is the fact that the Phillies are also in the World Series this year, and I’m going to get us tickets. I’m assuming the players get access to tickets like any other game.
Until I can actually have a conversation with Hollis, I keep messaging him and leaving him voicemails. He returns my messages, but I’m usually in class when he does.
This shit is hard. School. Our relationship. All of it. I didn’t realize how taxing it all would be. I guess that’s what happens when you’re single for your entire life like I’ve been. I should’ve become a spinster. My life would be so much easier.
It’s been almost two months since I got to school and yet it seems like it’s only been five minutes. The days are blurring together, passing me by, and I’m somehow afraid I’m learning nothing and learning too much all at once. My brain is at capacity and if I learn one more thing I think I’m going to explode. Yet, I’m learning so much it feels like I’m forgetting it all. It’s a vicious cycle. Being smack in the middle of midterms and all but living at the library isn’t helping me either. If it weren’t for Leo occasionally popping in to feed me and give me water, I’d probably forget altogether. I’m like a houseplant he’s keeping alive.
“You need sleep.”
I glance up from my favorite desk in a quiet corner of the library and see my human version of life support coming to rescue me. “I need a bigger cerebral cortex.”
“I’m going to pretend I know what you’re talking about.” I laugh and start packing up my things. He’s right. I need to head home. “Look at you. Two months ago, you wouldn’t dare walk the streets of Philly at night alone. Now it’s almost nine and you’re finally leaving. You’re getting wild.”
I smack him with the back of my hand.
“Please, as if I didn’t know you’d be here to walk me back.” He…blushes? Oh, no. Not good. Shut. It. Down. “I could always call my boyfriend, you know. He could stay on the phone wit
h me until I get home.”
“Right, this elusive boyfriend you’ve barely spoken to since you moved in and he hasn’t once come to visit you. I’ll believe it when I see him for myself.”
I roll my eyes, too tired to argue with him.
The air is crisp as we leave the library and I pull my jacket tighter around me. If I close my eyes, it almost feels like home. Philly and Boston aren’t all that different. The city lights and sounds, the chilly fall, the rich history. I inhale the fresh air and smile to myself, taking in the moment. I worked so hard to get here and I’m letting it all pass me by.
“Wanna come back to my place? I could go for some Chinese food and a crappy movie to rest my brain.” I scan my ID card to get into the apartment building and Leo follows me upstairs to our floor. “Unless you have other plans.” It is thirsty Thursday after all. Some people have lives outside of class, even if I don’t.
He sighs and I glance back over my shoulder to see him run a hand through his wavy blonde hair. His face is a picture of confusion and annoyance. I’m afraid of what he’s going to say next, so I cut him off, not even giving him a chance to respond.
“You know what, never mind. Forget I said anything. I’ll talk to you later.” I power walk down the hall to my place to get away from him. He catches me in a few quick strides.
We’re outside my door and his hand is on my bicep, halting me. “No, Lila, it’s…there’s something between us, right? I mean, I’m not imagining this.” He motions back and forth between us and I can honestly say I did not see that coming. I thought he had other plans and was just feeling guilty for leaving me hanging. Not this. I push open my door as he demands answers. “Come on, Lila, tell me the truth.”
“I’d like to hear the answer to this myself, actually.”
My head snaps toward my living room and I jump up and squeal, running to Hollis and tackling him. I hit a wall of hard, unmoving muscle.
Even through my excitement, I catch Leo say under his breath, “Shit, I guess there really is a boyfriend.”
“What are you doing here?” I kiss my boyfriend, but he doesn’t reciprocate. If things weren’t awkward before, the tension is even worse now. “Um, Hollis, this is my friend Leo. He lives down the hall. Leo, this is my very real boyfriend, Hollis.”
“Look, man, I’m sorry about that. Truthfully, I thought she was making you up to stay focused on school or whatever. Nothing happened between us. Anyway, uh, I’ll let you two go. See ya, Lila.”
I offer a small, weak smile and wave goodbye to my friend. I’ll clear the air with him later. What’s more important is making sure Hollis believes he’s just my friend, nothing more.
I tug on Hollis’ hand, still not totally believing he’s real and here with me. With reluctance, he follows me to the couch, though his gaze stays on the front door.
“He seems…friendly.” My boyfriend’s jaw ticks and I rub a hand over his stubble in an attempt to soothe him.
“He is. He’s just a friend, Hollis, I promise. I don’t even have time for you; how would I have time for a second boyfriend?” My attempt at lightening the mood falls short. “Really, though, Leo is a friend. You are my boyfriend who I love and miss and seriously, what are you doing here?”
He hasn’t thawed toward me completely, but he doesn’t push me away when I climb onto his lap, straddling him. It’s a small victory.
“I drove down tonight for the first game tomorrow. I thought I would surprise you.” His hands slowly start trailing up my legs, over my hips, and under the back of my shirt. Goosebumps pebble on my skin with the light contact. Fuck, I missed him.
“I’m glad you’re here.” I kiss him and this time he kisses me back. “How did you get in here, anyway?” I’m imagining him scaling the fire escape and the thought is comical to say the least.
“You need to find a more creative place to hide your spare key. Plus some girl let me in the building. You college kids are too trustworthy.” He winks, but he’s right. He could’ve been kidnapper or murderer or something breaking in here. I make a mental note to mix it up, but the thought is shoved to the back of my brain. For now, I need to get my fill of Hollis, literally and figuratively.
World series schedules are even more erratic than the regular season schedule. The first two games were played in Philly, the next three will be in Boston, and the final two games, if it comes to that, will be back in Philly. I don’t understand the logic, but there isn’t much about baseball that does make sense to me. I’m good with the basics, but beyond that, count me out.
I didn’t get to go to the first two games, which is some bullshit if you ask me. I can’t make the trek up to Boston for a game being held in the middle of the week, which means I have to catch them on TV. Of course, I want the Sox to win, but it would be pretty cool if it came down to the final game and I got to go. I mean, how epic would that be?
Things with Leo haven’t gone back to normal since the interaction with Hollis, either. I didn’t realize he was feeling some type of way. I don’t think I was leading him on? I mean, I was name dropping my boyfriend at every opportunity. It’s not like he didn’t see it coming. It’s not my fault he didn’t believe me.
I know I said it before, but my life has never felt rockier. Hollis and I were fine once the Leo situation was cleared up, but we’re still in a long distance relationship. My family has never been icier toward me, and that’s saying a lot. I haven’t even been able to catch up with Bridget or Phoebe lately with all of our schedules. Now, the one friend I have at school is giving me the cold shoulder too? I’ve never felt more alone.
On the plus side, my grades are stellar and I got the clinical rotation I wanted for next semester. After this semester is over, I’ll be spending most of my time in hospitals caring for critically ill children. I can’t wait to make the world better, one kid at a time, and help save their lives. It’s all I’ve ever wanted to do and it’s finally within reach.
At least one aspect of my life is not in utter shambles. Besides, who needs good relationships with friends and family when you have work? Ugh. Not even my optimism can trick me into thinking that’s a healthy concept. Though, my parents would probably agree with it. I guess that’s my answer.
I sit in my usual spot on my couch with textbooks and notecards sprawled around me, a half-empty glass of red wine on my coffee table, and a lone container of General Tso’s chicken on my lap. Game four of the series is starting and the Sox could win it here tonight.
As the first pitch is thrown, there’s a knock on my door. Not expecting anyone, I peek through the peephole and a laugh bursts out of me as I see the sad image on the other side.
I tug open the door and place my other hand on my hip. “What the hell are you doing?”
“This is my version of an apology. Memorize it because you’re never going to see this again.” Leo stands in the hall wearing a Red Sox jersey and hat and a box of pizza from our favorite place in his hands. He turns around and even shows me his back, with the number eighteen and Graham spelled out across his shoulder blades.
“As far as apologies go, this one has to be top five.”
“I didn’t even reach the top of the list? Ouch.”
“Well, there was the time my brother stole my parents’ credit card and took me on a shopping spree in high school all because he ratted out my bad grades to my parents. I mean, I got one C in history and the world ended. There was also the time Hollis and I got into a fight and he made it up to me by doing a striptease to Crazy in Love, the slowed down remix one from Fifty Shades. Yeah, that’s number one.” I wiggle my eyebrows and Leo cracks a grin, all awkwardness between us gone. Thank God.
“Fair enough. For tonight only, I am a Red Sox fan. Enjoy it while it lasts.”
I snap a picture of him. “Oh, I intend to.”
We eat and watch the game together. I’ve got to give him credit; he doesn’t even cheer when the Phillies make a run. By the time the game ends, I’m convinced he’s bad luck.
/>
“Take off that jersey. You jinxed them.” The Phillies ended up beating the Sox, but nothing compares to the beating Leo is giving himself.
“I wore a Sox jersey when the Phillies won. Blasphemous. I need to drown my sins in holy water.” I shove him and roll my eyes at his dramatics. “Hey, I’m sorry about the other night. I hope I didn’t cause too much friction between you and your guy.”
I shake my head, reassuring him. “No, we’re all good. Don’t worry about it.” He drops his head and there’s a part of me wondering if he’s still harboring feelings toward me, no matter how superficial they may be. “Well, I should get to bed. Long day tomorrow.”
The awkwardness has returned. I don’t want him to leave this way, but I’m backed into a corner. I hope someday he and Hollis will get to know one another and become friends, but I don’t think today is that day. He gets up to leave, but I stop him before he gets to the door.
“Wait.” He spins around to look at me with questions in his eyes. “Let’s get it all out on the table. I don’t want any weirdness between us, okay? You’re my only friend here and I don’t want to lose you over this petty shit.”
He runs a hand through his hair and sighs, his shoulders lifting slightly as he shrugs. “I don’t want that either, but I kinda feel like a fucking idiot.”
“What? No. Why?”
“Because I came onto you and you didn’t even have a chance to respond because your boyfriend was here waiting and overheard everything. It’s pretty fucking embarrassing, Lila. I was kind of hoping we could move past it and not make it a big thing.”
“I’m not going to be able to move past it until we talk about it.” I plead with him, looking him in the eye and silently begging for him to talk about it. He doesn’t seem happy about it, but he nods and comes back to sit with me on the couch. “Look, you have nothing to be embarrassed about. Seriously. It’s flattering and—” I stop myself. I don’t want to tell him something like, ‘if Hollis weren’t in the picture…’ because I don’t know that for sure and it wouldn’t do anyone any good. “And I’d be pretty pissed if you didn’t find allll of this hot AF.” I drag my hand down, showcasing my oversized t-shirt paired with ratty sweats and a rat’s nest for hair. Maybe Leo should get his eyes checked.
Fastball Flirt (The Boys of Summer Series Book 1) Page 16