Ruby went home two days after Nicholas was born. The mood was somber as soon as they got home. There was none of the joy that had accompanied Kendall’s birth. The baby was healthy, but their marriage no longer was.
Zack set out to prove she was wrong. He was gentle and kind to her and apologetic, wonderful with the baby, thrilled to have a son. He was patient with Ruby, and lavished attention on her. He was home with her every night. Eleanor could see how big an effort he was making, and Ruby made none. She was completely closed off.
It was August and they were in Tahoe when she finally began to soften a little and warmed up to Zack again. They went for long walks, and she didn’t say anything, but he could tell she had begun to forgive him. Whatever he had done, Eleanor was well aware that Ruby had made him pay dearly for it, and she felt sorry for both of them.
By the time they got back to the city at the end of August, things were almost back to normal again. Ruby was more reserved with him than she had been before, and more cautious, but she was inching toward Zack again, and he clung to her like a drowning man. He didn’t want to lose her, and he was willing to do anything to restore their marriage to what it had been before, if that was possible. She finally slept with him again in September. It had taken three months after Nicholas was born.
They spent Thanksgiving with Alex and Eleanor, since Zack’s parents didn’t celebrate holidays with him anymore, and hadn’t for years. He had usually spent it with friends until he and Ruby were married. His mother went to her husband’s family, and his father went on a trip with his girlfriend of the hour every year. So Zack and Ruby spent all holidays with Ruby’s family. They had left the two babies with the baby nurse at home.
Alex went out to the kitchen to carve the turkey, and he took a long time coming back. Eleanor went in to see if he needed help, and she came out a minute later looking sheet white. Zack rushed to the kitchen to see what had happened, with Ruby right behind him. Her grandfather was slumped over in his wheelchair. He must have died in an instant. When Zack checked, he had no pulse. He looked as though he had just gone to sleep. His heart had stopped. He was eighty-seven years old and Eleanor was seventy-three. They had loved each other for fifty-five years. All three of them stood crying as they looked at him. They called 911 and the paramedics came, but there was nothing anyone could do. It was over. And despite his reversals and injuries during the war, Alex had lived a good life.
Eleanor held his funeral the Monday after Thanksgiving, and the church was full, with people he had known in his youth, people he had worked with, clients from the shop, and someone he had served in the army with, whom Eleanor didn’t even know. Eleanor looked like she was in shock. Ruby stayed close to her every minute, and suggested she stay with them afterward, but Eleanor wanted to be at home. She closed the shop for a week, and then opened it again, but her heart wasn’t in it once Alex was gone.
She made the decision to close the shop in the spring. It had lost its meaning for her. They didn’t need the money anymore, and they’d had a good run. They had had it and enjoyed it for forty years. That seemed long enough. In the summer, she decided to rent out the building in the city, and move to Lake Tahoe. She wanted to live in the cottage and work in her garden. The British owner had hired a new overseer by then, shortly after Alex died. The original earl had died last year too, and the earl’s son had inherited the estate, although he’d never been there. He was putting off making any decisions about it, until he saw the property himself, and had no plans to come over for the moment. He wasn’t well himself.
Ruby worried about her grandmother being in Tahoe alone once she moved there, but she seemed happy. She spent most of her time outdoors, in her gardens. She had a greenhouse built and grew orchids. It suited her. She wasn’t interested in their city life alone. She had kept a few of her decorating clients, but eventually gave them up too. That chapter of her life was closed.
Ruby came up to visit her whenever she could, and brought the children to see her. Things seemed to be back on track with Zack again. It had taken a year after her discovery of the girl on his desk, but Ruby had finally forgiven him, and the atmosphere between them had warmed up at last.
A year after Eleanor had moved to Tahoe, Zack suggested they take her with them on their boat in July. It was a beautiful boat and they didn’t use it often enough. It was dangerous for toddlers running loose on the boat, so they never took them, and Ruby hated to leave her children, but she agreed with Zack that it would be good for her grandmother.
Ruby convinced her to go with them in July. Alex had been gone for a year and a half by then, and they were delighted when Eleanor accepted the invitation. They were going to meet the boat in Monaco, and travel into Italy, possibly as far as Sardinia, and spend two weeks on the boat. Eleanor wanted to do some traveling on her own after that, and Zack and Ruby were going to Saint Tropez to meet friends. They were planning to be gone for three weeks in all, and were leaving Kendall and Nick at home. Nick was two and Kendall was three, and it was still too dangerous for them on the boat. They could easily have fallen overboard or gotten hurt. It would be the longest span of time Ruby had ever been away from them.
Ruby was going to fly from San Francisco with her grandmother, and Zack was planning to arrive a day later, after a meeting in London. It would give Ruby and Eleanor a day to shop in Monaco, and relax on the luxurious yacht before Zack arrived. Eleanor was looking forward to the trip, and Ruby to being with her. They left in good spirits. It was a long flight and they arrived in Monaco in the late afternoon. The crew was ready for them and had the cabins all set. Ruby and Eleanor had dinner on deck, in the warm summer night, and went to bed early after the long trip. The next day they set out on their adventure to explore the shops. Zack was due to arrive on a commercial flight at five that afternoon and one of the crew would pick him up.
The two women had just gotten back to the boat after a day of shopping, when the captain came to see Ruby in her cabin to inform her that Mr. Katz had called while she was out. He had missed his flight and would arrive the next day at lunchtime. He was staying at Claridge’s. She called to talk to him and find out if everything was all right, but he was out. She called him again that night, and he wasn’t back yet, but she didn’t think anything of it. She hadn’t had a whiff of any misbehavior on his part in two years. His hanky-panky days appeared to be over. She had stopped worrying about it. They had just been in a bad phase, with her pregnant for two years running. They had somehow become disconnected, but were back on track again. It made her loath to have a third child. She didn’t want to disrupt their marriage, and Zack needed her full attention. She realized now that he had been so starved for affection growing up that there was a part of him that needed Ruby almost like a mother, and at times he felt in competition with his own children for her love.
Eleanor and Ruby had a lazy morning, and took a long walk along the port. They were back in time for lunch, and Zack was scheduled to arrive by then. Instead, when they got back, the captain had another message. An emergency meeting had been called and Zack was going to be another day late. She called him but he wasn’t in his hotel room, and she left him another message. To pass the time, Ruby had the captain take them out on the boat that afternoon. They motored to Cap d’Antibes, got off at the Hotel du Cap and had a look around, and then returned to Monaco. The emergency meeting had apparently extended, and Zack said he would be there in two days. He called her himself before dinner, apologized profusely that his meetings had gotten extended, and suggested that she and Eleanor spend a day in Portofino, which was a charming little port town. He apologized sincerely again and told her he missed her and felt terrible about the delay.
In the end, Zack arrived five days late, flustered and apologetic. Ruby and her grandmother had been taking day trips all week. They were enjoying being together, but it was frustrating waiting for Zack every day. He arrived at last in a flurry of apo
logies and kissed Ruby passionately and seemed genuinely happy to see her, and her grandmother.
As a peace offering, he brought Eleanor a beautiful Hermès scarf, and an Hermès alligator handbag for Ruby, which she knew cost a fortune. The minute she saw it, her blood ran cold, she knew what had happened and why he had been delayed. The shock of realization was evident on her face, and her grandmother saw it and didn’t comment. She didn’t want to make the situation worse with her own suspicions and thanked Zack profusely for the scarf.
They set off that night for Sardinia, and enjoyed the rest of the trip. They spent another week on the boat together, he was attentive and loving to Ruby, and she looked distracted. And then Eleanor took off for Lake Como, which she had wanted to see years earlier on her honeymoon, when she and Alex had had to cut their trip short. Then she was going to visit favorite clients of her shop, in Madrid. It was a major adventure for her and she was excited about it. As soon as she left the boat, Ruby descended to their cabin, and the boat took off for Saint Tropez. She didn’t emerge until lunchtime and she was icy with Zack when she did. The alligator bag was back in its box by then, and she handed it to him at the lunch table. It had been the tip-off as to what he was doing in London, and why he was five days late when he joined them.
“What’s that?” He looked surprised when she handed the orange box to him.
“Don’t try to buy me off, Zack. It’s not worthy of you. And it gives you away every time.” It had a familiar ring to it and dredged up memories she had tried to forget.
“What’s that supposed to mean?” He looked innocent and hurt but she knew better.
“You know what it means and so do I. What were you doing in London for five days while my grandmother and I cooled our heels waiting for you?”
“I told you. I was stuck in meetings all week. I would have come sooner if I could. I’m sorry you don’t like the bag.”
“I love the bag, but I know what it means when you give me presents like that.” He had finally sold the Rolls after she had refused to drive it again. He got the point. She didn’t say anything to him after that all through lunch, with the crew serving them, and they got to Saint Tropez late that afternoon. There was no room for them in the port, because the boat was so big, so they anchored just outside, and she went into the port with the tender, and walked around town, wondering if she had been unfair to him and overreacted. But she didn’t believe his excuses about London and his five-day delay. Whatever he’d been doing, he’d been a fool to do it then, while she and her grandmother waited for him on the boat. He had a knack for getting caught in his infidelities, almost as though he couldn’t stop himself, and there was something compulsive about it, even if it meant getting found out. Somewhere in him there was an insatiable need for affection, a void he could never fill because he’d been abandoned by his mother as a child, no matter how much Ruby loved him. He needed more, and in his position, it was easy to find.
When she got back to the boat, they had to dress for dinner. She was trying not to act on her suspicions about him. They were meeting a group of people whom Zack knew and she didn’t. It had sounded like fun when he’d suggested it and organized it for them. But she wasn’t in the mood for it that night. They were meeting at a popular restaurant, and all she knew was that there would be eight or ten people who were planning to be in Saint Tropez at the same time, and all knew each other, and he had insisted she’d enjoy them.
They went back into the port with the tender, and were the last to arrive at the restaurant. She could see immediately that they were a fashionable group. They all looked very chic and the women were wearing good jewelry. Ruby had dressed very simply and felt instantly out of place when they arrived. Zack hadn’t warned her that they were a jet-set crowd. When he introduced her, she realized that about half of the group were British and the others were French, and most of them had houses in the area. The conversation at the table was lively, and Ruby was seated between two Englishmen who were interesting to talk to and very funny. She relaxed as the evening wore on. The others were all couples, except two people who were houseguests of the others. One was a gay man, and the other was a very attractive single British woman named Marlene. She somehow wound up seated next to Zack, and in a lull in the conversation, Ruby heard her say to Zack, “It was fun in London, darling, wasn’t it?” He nodded and smiled and said something to her, and didn’t realize Ruby was watching them. The woman spotted it immediately. Ruby saw her end the exchange abruptly, and turn to talk to the man on her other side. But several times during dinner, Ruby saw Zack and Marlene exchange glances. Her antennae were up and her instincts alert and she knew instantly that her suspicions had been correct, and obviously the whole evening had been orchestrated so he could see Marlene again. She had just come down from London. Ruby was smarter than Zack gave her credit for, and it explained the alligator handbag from Hermès.
She was quiet for the rest of the evening after that, and when he invited the whole group to the boat the next day for a day sail she didn’t comment. But when they got back to the Ruby Moon, she turned to him with an icy look.
“Tell me, how does this work, just so I know the ground rules for tomorrow. You sneak off with Marlene, while I entertain your other guests? Or I turn a blind eye and pretend I don’t know what’s going on while she hangs all over you in plain sight?” She had watched them lean toward each other at dinner and touch arms several times, sitting close together.
“What are you talking about?” He’d had a lot to drink at dinner, and he wasn’t as smooth as he would have liked when he responded.
“You know exactly what I’m talking about.” She imitated Marlene’s voice perfectly then. “ ‘It was fun in London, darling, wasn’t it?’ Do you actually think I’m going to sit here and let you make a fool of me while you play out the charade tomorrow? I thought dinner in Saint Tropez was going to be fun. As it turns out, it was carefully planned, and I was the fool there. You’re not very subtle, Zack. Or very smart.”
“Fine,” he said angrily. “Do you want me to call and cancel them for tomorrow? I will if that’s what you want.” Ruby suspected that he wouldn’t deprive himself of the chance to see her. He was still the boy in the candy store, who wanted it all and could afford it, and thought he could pull it off. And he was still so young. Too young to have a wife and two kids and his colossal success. Ruby realized now that she’d been a fool to think all that money wouldn’t matter and it wouldn’t change him. It had.
“That’s up to you,” she said, about canceling the guests for the next day, and went downstairs to their cabin.
As it turned out, he didn’t cancel, and the whole group turned up at noon, excited to be spending a day on their fabulous yacht. One of the deckhands gave it away, when he said “Nice to see you again, miss” to Marlene as she came on board. Ruby didn’t say a word and let the whole scenario play out. Everyone went swimming topless before lunch, and then they sat down to a lively lunch. Marlene just happened to sit next to Zack, again, with Ruby at the other end of the table. Zack offered her a tour of the boat, which he didn’t offer the others, and they disappeared for half an hour, and returned looking flushed and a little disheveled. She would have laughed if Zack had his shorts on backward or inside out. He didn’t need to. It was obvious what they’d been doing, and he had a small lipstick smudge on his neck, which Ruby spotted immediately and pretended not to notice.
She got through the day somehow, with her heart aching. At six o’clock, they got back to their spot outside the port, and all the guests got in the tender. Marlene had swum topless all afternoon, and Zack could barely contain himself. They both waved as the guests departed back to the port, Zack enthusiastically and Ruby with a sad, defeated look. He had won for the day, but lost so much more in the process.
As soon as they left, Ruby headed downstairs to their cabin and started to pack. Zack followed her a minute later
, sensing a showdown in the offing.
“What are you doing?”
“Packing,” she said, filling her suitcase as quickly as she could, tossing her shoes in, and the assortment of beach clothes she’d brought with her. She said nothing.
“Why are you doing that?” He tried to look innocent but wasn’t convincing.
“You must be joking. Other than Billy the deckhand telling Marlene that he was happy to see her again, her tits in my face all day, and your giving her a tour of the boat for half an hour, where you both came back hot and sweaty with her lipstick on your neck.” She pointed and it was still there when he glanced in the mirror and looked mortified. “I can’t imagine why I’d be packing, but maybe you can. Just how dumb do you think I am?”
“You’re the smartest woman I know,” he said, looking like a beaten child. “She’s a very effusive, lonely woman. She’s a widow, and she’s harmless.”
“I’m very sorry to hear it, about her being a widow. Tell me something, is that what you use this boat for? Your little flings while I think you’re away on business and you lie to me about where you are? That must be an expensive hobby for you, keeping the boat for that.” It cost him a fortune to run it, but he loved it, far more than she did. “If that’s the case, I won’t be coming back here again. I’m not going to have the whole crew laughing at me behind my back, while you bring your girlfriends here, and then invite them back on the boat when I’m on board. That’s a bit much. Don’t you think? Or have you lost all sense of decency? Are you so rich and important now that you think you can buy anything, and have anyone you want? Or is that really how it is? And you don’t care if you have a wife and kids to come home to, you just want to grab it all, the eternal kid in a candy store. The trouble is you’re twenty-eight years old, almost twenty-nine, you’re at the top of your game, and you can have any woman you want. You never used to care about all that, but you do now. You shouldn’t be stuck with me, Zack. That was our big mistake. You were my best friend. But I guess I’m not very interesting compared to the women you meet now. And they all want you. And you need all of us, not just me. You’re turning into your father, or you will if you’re not careful. He needs a flock of women to feed his ego. You want them to fill the void you can never fill.
The Wedding Dress Page 22