by Emily Camp
“Why? Am I turning you on?” Spencer’s rough fingers grazed her neck as he slid her hair out of the way.
Bree wanted to push him away, but when she caught a glimpse of Garrett looking at them, she turned, hooked her arm around his neck, and pulled his face to hers.
She planted her mouth on his. What was she doing? She’d lost all reason.
Spencer’s kiss back surprised her. It wasn’t rough and forceful, but soft and sweet; he slid one arm around her waist and the other hand on her neck.
The kiss sent tingles from her lips all the way to her toes.
When he finally detached from her, she stood still, her eyes closed and lips puckered out.
“He’s gone,” Spencer whispered.
“Huh?” She blinked. “Who’s gone?” She was still in whatever world he sent her to.
“Garrett, you know, your baby-daddy. The one you are trying to make jealous.” He shoved his hands in his pockets and blond bangs flopped over his eyes.
“Right … Garrett.” She held fingers to her lips.
The light melody of her favorite love song blasted from the gym.
“You know what, Br-” he began, but she cut him off.
“Ooh, slow song.” She grabbed his hand and pulled him to the dance floor.
Bree threw her body up against his, hooking her arms around his neck. She buried her face against his coat, taking in a deep breath, smelling that musky-soap smell.
At first, his body was stiff, but as she danced against him, he relaxed into her, and his chin fell on her shoulder.
She never thought Spencer’s arms would feel like this. Never thought anyone would feel comfortable, like Garrett. She’d even almost forgotten that Garrett was there. The gym was dark, with a disco ball above reflecting flickering lights on the dancers.
She closed her eyes. “Why did you carry me to my bed last night?”
He didn’t respond. His hands slid down to her bottom, squeezing it. She startled.
“He’s watching.”
But Bree didn’t care if Garrett was watching. She wanted answers.
She wasn’t sure what was going on between her and Spencer, but she knew the feelings that she had, and she needed to know if he felt the same.
As soon as the song ended, he pulled away from her. Leaving her empty.
She started to open her mouth to say something when Carly’s hand wrapped around her wrist. “This is our jam!”
Before she knew it, Bree was in a circle of other girls hopping along to the music, and giggling, but watching Spencer as he looked around the room, his hands in his pockets. He seemed lonely, slipping out of the gym and disappearing from her sight.
Bree swayed her hips and forced a smile. It didn’t even matter to her that Paige was grinding against Garrett like they were in a night club, not a high school dance.
As soon as the song was over, she rushed off the dance floor in search of Spencer. She slipped into her clear heels and lifted her dress just enough off the ground to gain speed.
He wasn’t in the foyer.
Lewis snickered by the punch bowl as he glanced over his shoulder like he was on some secret mission.
She turned back to the door.
She picked her dress up and began again, only to be stopped by a chest. Hands fell on her hips and she looked up to see white.
What was Garrett doing?
She thought he was on the dance floor with his queen.
“Bree,” his voice was soft and his blue eyes penetrated hers. “Spencer just told me everything.”
She looked around his arm trying to figure out what was going on. “Where is he?” She didn’t care what he told Garrett, she only cared about finding him. They needed to talk.
That was when Garrett’s arms slipped around her, pulling her close. “He said you still love me.” He kissed the top of her head. “And you know I still love you.”
Bree stood stiff in his arms. She didn’t return the hug. His hands run up and down her back.
“You look beautiful tonight,” he whispered as he kissed her cheek. “Can we just forget about everything … you breaking up with me … Paige … Spencer? Let’s go in there and finish this dance, you and me together.”
She hesitated.
His arms grew tighter around her. He smelled like Paige’s rank, flowery perfume that was giving her a headache.
“Don’t you want me back?” His voice was rough and choppy.
Bree shook her head. “I don’t know.” She placed her hands on his chest and gave him a small shove.
His eyes watered, his forehead wrinkled. “Bree, please.”
“No, Garrett, I think …” she took in a deep breath and looked at the glass doors. It was dark outside and she couldn’t see, but she knew that’s where Spencer was. “I don’t know.”
“Don’t say that.”
“Excuse me,” she pushed around him, “I need to find my date.”
Bree rushed out of the building, her dress balled in her hands. She looked around the parking lot, but saw nothing. Their limo was still parked a line of several others.
She was ready to give up when she noticed the slumped figure across the street as he walked under the lamp.
Was he going to abandon her at the dance? She knew there was no way she was going to catch up with him in her dress. She pulled her cell phone out of her strapless bra, and sent him a quick text, leaving your date stranded?
She watched as he fumbled in his pocket and pulled out his phone. A few minutes later, she received the reply. I left my date with the one she really wants.
No, come back. She sent.
“Bree.” Garrett called behind her.
Go, be with your baby daddy. Spencer replied.
I don’t want to.
He loves you.
Bree climbed in the limo and ordered the driver toward Spencer.
“Bree,” Garrett called again.
Bree only looked back for a second. She almost felt bad for Garrett standing outside the double doors, watching her. His shoulders slumped and frown on his face, until Paige came barreling out of the building, pulling his attention away.
The street lamp crackled above when she climbed out of the limo.
“Spencer.” Her heart raced.
“What are you doing, Bree?” he slipped his phone in his jacket. “Go back to the dance.”
“Do you have feelings for me?” The cold air bit at her bare shoulders.
“I told you, I don’t make any promises I can’t keep.” He shoved his hands in his pockets.
“I didn’t ask you to promise me anything. I want to know how you feel about me.” She tucked her fly away hair behind her ear. She shivered in the cold. Cars whizzed by.
He stared at her for what felt like an eternity. “Why?”
“Because I want to know why one minute you are this sweet, caring guy and then the next you’re a cocky jerk. Why didn’t you answer me at the dance when I asked why you carried me to bed? Why did you kiss me on the forehead? Why did you cheer me up when I was having a bad day? Why do you do all those things then turn around and …” She felt hollow, the cold air burning her throat as she breathed. “Why did you tell Garrett I still love him when I think … I think … I might have feelings for you?” She regretted the words as soon as they left her mouth, maybe she read him wrong, maybe he was just playing her like every other girl. A tear slipped out of the corner of her eye.
“Because that.” He pointed to her face. “I don’t want to be the guy that makes you cry,” he shouted, as he held his arms out. “Because yes, I do care about you. I love the way your nose crinkles when you are trying not to laugh. I love how comfortable it is to be around you and the fact you always smell like cookies. And I think your baby is cool, too. But I don’t want you to care about me, because I’m not good for you.”
Her heart beat like a drum in her chest when she stepped closer to him. “I don’t care if you do or you don’t want me to. It’s too late, it alread
y happened.”
His chest deflated and inflated hard. He stared at the ground, his fists by his sides. “I don’t want this.” He motioned his hand between them when he finally looked up. “You and Bailey need to be a family with Garrett. He loves you and wants you back.”
Bree shook her head, surprised when brown ringlets fell in her face with the amount of hair spray she put in her hair. “What if that’s not what I want?”
As if it was even possible, his frown grew deeper. “What if it is? I’m going home. I finally called my dad. Who knows when you’ll see me again? Go back to the dance.” He motioned to the limo and stepped backwards, putting more distance between them.
“I don’t understand!” She yelled as she felt her chest ache, her heart shattering again like it had been for the last few months only this time it wasn’t over Garrett “You say you don’t want to hurt me, but that’s what you’re doing right now.”
“You don’t know what you’re talking about.” His face shot down again as he mumbled the words and gripped the back of his neck.
“Yes I do.” She wanted to reach out for him. Instead she stayed cemented to the sidewalk, griping her dress.
Her cell phone buzzed in her bra. She noticed a slight smirk on Spencer’s face as she reached into her cleavage to pull it out.
It was Carly. Where RU?
I’m with Spencer.
Almost immediately, Carly sent back I thought you left with Garrett.
Wait, Garrett left, too? Later she sped text back just in enough time to finally reach her hand out, grabbing the arm of Spencer’s coat before he took the opportunity to walk away. “Please don’t go.”
He stared at her hand around his forearm. “I told Parker I wouldn’t.”
“Parker knows?”
“I’m telling you, this isn’t going to happen, you and me. I’m not relationship type.”
Bree shook her head as her hand dropped from him. This was where he should take her in his arms and tell her he didn’t care what anybody said, he was going to be with her … like Garrett did … maybe her year with Garrett spoiled her.
“Never mind. I’m sorry I brought it up.” She sniffed before turning away from him. She grasping the bottom of her ridiculous dress before rushing off. She knew she shouldn’t have come to this stupid dance.
Kicking her heels off and carrying them in her hand, she heaved the cold air in her lungs, it burned. Her eyes stung as she blinked away the tears, her bare shoulders frozen and numb. She didn’t know where she was going, or what she was doing. For fear of running into him again, she didn’t want to go back to Parker’s.
Maybe Bree did make a complete fool of herself and maybe she didn’t know what she was talking about, but it wasn’t about her. She had Bailey to think about. She didn’t have time for silly crushes or chasing boys who didn’t care, she only hated that it took her this long to realize it.
The loud rumble that grew louder told her who was following her. She hoped he didn’t stop, that he’d just drive by.
“Bree, what’re you doing?” He shouted over the engine of his car. His voice made her chest tight. She wanted to cry. She wanted to unload on him, but she wouldn’t. The car came to a stop, and he was beside her before she had a chance to respond. “It’s cold …” his white jacket, still warm from his body, fell over her shoulders. If she wasn’t freezing she might have shrugged it off.
“Go away.” She kept her arms crossed over her stomach.
“Bree, wait,” Garrett grabbed her waist, though she didn’t want to, the tears poured out.
She slapped her hands on his chest. “Let me go.”
“Not till you tell me what’s wrong.” He pulled her close, despite her.
With her face pressed against him, she sobbed, “Everything, okay? Everything I touch just ... I tried to help my mom, but only made things worse. If it wasn’t for me, your best friend would still be alive. I tried to keep Bryson safe and he has a broken arm because of it. And Bailey, I never know what to do with her.”
She hated she needed him. When his arm enclosed around her, it felt right, but at the same time, it hurt. His lips pressed against the side of her head. “Bree,” his voice was soft, “none of that’s true. You tried and I love you for that. Colten died saving you. He did that because it was the right thing to do. It wasn’t your fault. It was the guys who shot up the school. You’re a great mom. Bailey is always taken care of and safe with you.”
“But …” Bree sniffed, raising her chin up to look at him.
“Do you wanna come home with me?” he ran his hand up and down her arm, taking the chill off. “Hang with Bailey as a family?”
“I don’t know.”
“Where else are you going to go?” He pointed down the empty sidewalk lit up only by the few flickering streetlights and porch lamps.
“I …”
“You’re not walking.”
She dried her eyes with the back of her hands. “Why do you still want me?”
“Despite everything that’s happened, none of it’s been about you. You always put others before yourself. That’s one of the things I love most about you.”
She started to open her mouth, but he guided her toward the car. She climbed into the passenger’s side. He settled in the driver’s side. His gold bow hung loose and cockeyed around his collar. His light brown hair was no longer slicked down like at the dance, but disheveled.
“You left Paige at the dance?”
His shoulders slumped. “Listen, about that …”
“You don’t …”
“I do. She told me everything. You were right.”
“But …”
“I know I’ll probably never be able to make it up to you, but I’d like to try. Can we start by going to my house and hanging out? My mom’s baking brownies.”
She stared up at the mini football dangling from the rearview mirror and smiled. “Sounds so … middle school.”
He chuckled, his engine revving. “Maybe that’s what we need.”
Despite everything that’d happened the last month or so, she still felt like she was with a friend. “Yeah, I think so, just hang out.”
Maybe that was why her feelings for Spencer were there, because with him she’d just been able to hang out and be a kid again. Things with Garrett were complicated with pressure of having to be something all the time, whether a mom, or even a girlfriend. She wasn’t ever able to be herself.
His grin grew wider, the one she remembered falling for last year.
***
The house smelled like chocolate, and Bailey’s coos filled the air as Bree stepped inside with Garrett. The metal door slapped shut behind them.
“That was quick.” Robin buzzed across the kitchen, her back toward them, facing Bailey, who jabbered from her high chair, slapping the tray in front of her.
“The dance was boring.” He winked down at Bree, gliding further inside.
“Dadada,” Bailey reached up, grabbing the air with her hands. “Mamama,”
“That’s new.” Robin turned toward Garrett, then gasped when her eyes fell on Bree. She cupped her hands to her mouth. “Look at you!” She floated to Bree, pulling her into an embrace. “You’re so beautiful.”
“Dadada,” Bailey giggled as Garrett pulled her out of her chair.
“What happened to your dates?”
“We ditched them.” Garrett lifted Bailey above his head, her giggles grew louder and her chubby legs pumped.
“Gare …” Robin said.
He brought her back down and lifted her up again. “Who’s my girl?”
This time she squealed.
“Garrett, that isn’t a good idea,” Robin said.
He brought her back down. “She likes it.” He lifted her back up, more giggles and squeals. He chuckled along with her, then again, but instead of giggles coming out this time, white goo oozed from her mouth, dripping directly into Garrett’s.
He pulled her back down this time, much quicker t
han before, gagging. Bree tried to hold her breath to keep from laughing, but it came out anyway. Garrett spit in the sink, Bailey dangling at his side, kicking her legs like it was part of the game. “A little help here, please.”
Robin took Bailey under her arms and adjusted her on her hip. “I was going to tell you I just fed her. When are you going to learn to listen to me? I know what’s best.”
Garrett held his head under the faucet, the water running in his open mouth.
Bailey giggled along with Bree and Robin.
He shook out his head, water splaying from his hair as he straightened up, “I feel loved, the three women in my life making fun of me.”
“You brought it on yourself.” Robin held Bailey toward him, who was reaching for him again.
“Oh, no you don’t.” He tapped her on her little nose. Her mouth opened wide and let out a coo.
“The night’s still early. What are you two planning on getting into now?”
“Well,” Garrett dipped in the fridge, pulling out a red Gatorade.
Bailey reached for Bree, who placed her on her hip.
“We were thinking we’d help Zeke play his game, but,” Garrett stretched his neck, toward the living room. “Where is he anyway?”
“He went to Alex’s for the night.” Robin rinsed her hands in the sink. “I was planning on having Bailey a little longer. If you want, the living room is all yours. Watch a movie or something. Be kids again for the night.” She reached for Bailey again.
Garrett looked at Bree, his lips twisted up on one side and an eyebrow lifted. “What do you think?”
“Can we have brownies?” Bree smiled.
“They’re in the oven.” When she nodded, Bailey grabbed a fist full of her blond hair. Without missing a beat, she pried Bailey’s little fingers away. “We’ll bring them in when they’re done. You two enjoy your date.”
Bree opened her mouth to correct her, but when she glanced at Garrett, his smile wide and head tilted, she couldn’t.
***
“What do you want to watch?” Garrett lounged back, knees apart and feet flat on the floor, the video game controller in hand, as he browsed through the movie selection.