by Amelia Wilde
For a moment, I’m confused. “I’m sorry, I thought you were talking about the race.”
“I’m talking about this person you’ve taken up with as of late.” Criticism is in her tone, and it sets my jaw. Miss Westingroot will not appraise my behavior if she knows whats best for her.
“I enjoy Ava’s company. She’s fresh and interesting.”
“Fresh and interesting? What’s that supposed to mean?”
For a moment, I study this beautiful ice queen’s face, and all the reasons my fifteen year-old infatuation didn’t survive into maturity are clear. Lara and I have never spoken the same language.
“If we’re going to stay relevant, we need to meet people outside our insulated group.”
“Stay relevant?” Her mocking laugh irritates me. “We’re relevant because of who we are, Rowan. We are Monagasco. Our country has existed for eight hundred years! We’re legendary.”
“I haven’t existed for eight hundred years. It’s important for our leaders to keep up with the times. Can you not understand that?”
She rolls her eyes and does a little wave. “You have always had peculiar notions, Rowan. It’s because you read too much.”
“Is that so?” I might have had too much wine when I let her go down on me before, but I won’t be duplicating that mistake.
“Stick with what works.” She glances to where Cal is making some joke, doing his best to distract Ava. “Shall I expect you to call me about the gala?”
“I’m pretty confident I already have an escort.”
That earns me a glare. “Then I suppose I should take my leave. Good afternoon, Rowan. Enjoy your dinner.”
Lara strides away, but Felicity lingers a moment longer. “She’s furious. Nice work.”
“It wasn’t intentional.”
Felicity does a little wave in Cal’s direction. “Is this for show or are you being serious?”
Her blunt style relaxes me. “I hope it becomes very serious.”
“But she’s not wealthy or connected,” Felicity’s thin lips grow even thinner as she presses them down. “And now you’re racing again.”
“What of it?” I’m curious as to what she might say.
She only holds up both hands. “I’m on your side. It’s the old guard you have to appease. They’re only happy making us young ones suffer through the same rules and regulations that made them miserable when they were our age.”
“I’m not interested in appeasing anyone.” It’s not entirely true, considering how hard I’ve been working to make peace since Hummergate.
“Clearly,” Felicity laughs. “So… Need another member for your pit crew?”
“Have you ever been on a pit crew?”
“No.” Her smile fades, and I shake my head.
“It’s a brutal course. I’ll need an experienced team.”
“You’re right.” Felicity nods, and for a moment, we’re quiet.
It gives me a second to remember that night at the ball and how she rescued me from the barrage of single females of a certain age. I do owe her one.
“Tell you what. I’ll get you a pass so you can come down, hang with the guys, watch the race up close.”
Her eyes light. “Thanks! You’re amazing!” She does a little clap. “And I’ll look out for your new lady. Lord knows she’ll need a buffer in this crowd.”
“You’re a sport.” I pat her shoulder and take a step toward the bar.
“I’m betting on you, Rowan Westringham Tate,” she calls. “Don’t get killed.”
“I don’t intend to.”
With a little salute, she’s gone, and I continue to where Ava stands with Cal. He hands her a whiskey sour, and her expression isn’t as sunny as before. She’s not smiling, and I want to take her away from here where I can reassure her she’s the only female I want in my bed.
“Are we still waiting on Zelda?” I look to my brother.
“She just texted she’s almost here.” Cal slips his phone in his pocket, and I understand his reason for checking it so often now.
I’ve never seen Cal worry this much about the whereabouts of a female. It’s a nice change for him, and I’d give him a little good-natured teasing. Only I notice how quiet Ava is being.
I place my hand on her arm, and when she glances up, my chest tightens. “We’re going to rain-check dinner,” I tell Cal. “I’m taking Ava back to Occitan.”
A loud shuffling noise draws all our attention. Two men are struggling in the hedge, both holding cameras with telephoto lenses.
Cal’s voice is low and urgent. “You’d better go now.”
Ava places her glass on the bar and takes my arm as we make a quick escape through the small restaurant. We’re in the car as more photographers flood into the public space. Hajib closes the door with a solid slam, and we’re off.
Leaning forward in the seat, I place my forearms on my thighs frustrated by my inability to control the flow of information about me.
“It’s too bad,” Ava says with a little sigh. “I wanted to try that place.”
This is not what I expected or want to hear. “Are you sorry we’re leaving?”
She reaches out and takes my hand. “I’m not sorry to be with you or to be away from those reporters. You joining the race must be big news.”
I cover her slim hand with both of mine and lean back so I can meet her eyes. I remember how afraid she looked when Cal dropped the bomb. “I’m sorry I didn’t tell you about the race.”
Shaking her head, she lets out a sad little laugh. “You don’t have to tell me about anything you do. Our time together is lovely, but I know my place. This isn’t forever.”
Those words twist my stomach. I study her small hand in mine, thinking about my conversation with Lara. I think about everything happening now, all the good things, and how my lack of freedom might change as a result. Before the deal, I had to keep in mind the future, our political situation, and economic growth. With the deal I’ve hammered out, two of these issues are somewhat resolved.
“I was only thinking…” she hesitates, drawing my full attention. “Cal said competitive racing is so dangerous. He said you shouldn’t do it because you’re the future king.”
It’s a fair assessment, and the reason I’ve held back up to now. “The race is on a slow track. It’s almost impossible to pass other cars, which is how most of the wrecks occur.”
“What happens if you do crash?”
“Are you worried?”
Her pretty lips press together, and her gaze flickers to her lap. “Yes, I am. Very much.”
Warmth spreads through my stomach, making me smile. Now we’re back to where I want us to be. “Then you’ll have to give me something for luck.”
She blinks a few times before looking up again. She seems to be thinking of something, and with a little nod, she smiles. “I have something.”
“I can’t wait to see it.”
We’re at the country house, exiting the vehicle, and I look up at the clear sky. It’s warm and inviting, and I intend for us to have an easy time, a late dinner, a swim, and then a seductive night. Mother is still in Marins, giving us the place to ourselves. Taking her hand, I lead Ava up the long, white steps, but when we get to the top, I follow the wrap-around porch to the back where we have a clear view of the calm waters of our little cove.
“It’s so beautiful!” she sighs.
Looking out at the sapphire blue water, I pull her against my chest, sliding my hands up the soft fabric of her dress. Her palms rest on my shirtfront, and I lean forward to kiss her cheek, moving to her ear.
“Let’s go for a swim.”
A shiver moves through her, and it registers straight to my cock. “I don’t have a swimsuit,” she replies in a sultry tone.
“Even better.” Heat is in my voice.
Our eyes meet, and hers are darker. I slide my hands to her cheeks, holding her face as my jaw tightens. “Cal thinks we have a mole on the estate taking pictures. Possibly someo
ne on staff.”
Her hands slide up to cup my cheeks, mirroring my gesture. “Then we’ll have to be discreet.” She rises on tiptoe and kisses me quickly, catching my lip between her teeth.
My semi goes to full hard-on at once, but she twirls out of my arms. “Meet you at the beach!”
She runs down the narrow boardwalk to the pier, laughing and waving for me to follow her. I stand for a moment watching, thinking how calm and satisfied I feel right now. This is how it should be.
Once Ava reaches the shoreline, her white dress flies over her head in a swift movement. Her long, tanned body disappears in the blue waves, and I’m right behind her, covering the distance in record time.
18
Searching
Zelda
When I arrive at the Brasserie, I only find Cal inside. He’s at the bar, standing beside a vacant barstool with a gin and tonic waiting. I can’t begin to tell him how much I appreciate it. At the same time, the closer I get, the worse I ache. Was it only last night we were so happy together, laughing and watching movies in the Paris Hotel?
“Hello, beautiful.” Cal kisses my cheek as I climb onto the barstool.
“Thanks for this.” I lift the skinny glass and take a sip. “You knew just what I needed.”
“I aim to please,” he grins, placing a hand on my waist. “You just missed Ro and Ava. I won’t lie to you, I’m pretty sure the crown prince is in deep smit.”
That helps me smile. “I’ve never seen Ava so happy. It’s like a fairytale.”
“There you go again with the fairytales. I warned you about those.” My stomach sinks, but he can’t possibly begin to know how true his statement is.
I fight it off. “Still, I’m happy to see them both so happy.”
“It is rather inspiring, isn’t it? Give you any ideas? Sudden cravings?” He leans in and gives me a little eyebrow twitch. As usual, my stomach flips.
Bad feelings aside, I love sitting here with him, exchanging sexual innuendo. He’s so casual in his jeans and light sweater. His brown hair is messy from the wind on the track, and his hazel eyes glow. I know from experience under that blue sweater are the lines and muscles that make me swoon. I almost wish we could blow off dinner as well.
“I’m sorry the ambience isn’t what it used to be here,” he says, misinterpreting my quiet observation. “We should’ve gone to the Buddha bar.”
“The Buddha bar! What’s that?”
“Sushi, Chinese, and Thai food.”
“Mm, I love Thai food!”
His eyes darken, and he steps forward, pulling me against his chest. “I like the full-body orgasm you had saying that.”
Reaching up, I pinch his side. “I did not.” Feeling naughty, I add, “If I had an orgasm it was looking at you.”
He releases me and shakes his head. “Shit, I’m not hungry anymore.” With a wink, he adds, “At least not for food.”
I laugh as I take another sip of my drink. How is it possible this man erases all the heaviness I feel?
“We need to eat. We have to keep our strength up for all that fucking.”
He laughs more. “Dammit, Zee. You’re killing me.”
My eyes narrow, and he takes another sip of champagne. Taking the menu, I scan the unusual selection—Mediterranean with Asian accents?
“What did my uncle want?” Cal says, and just like that, my happiness bursts like a bubble. He sees the change, and concern fills his voice. “Is something wrong?”
My conversation in the limo, my reason for being here, all of it races back to the forefront of my mind. So many secrets I’m keeping from him, so many lies. How could I ever tell him the truth and expect him to understand? Reggie’s voice is in my head, I’ll expose you for the lying little cunt you are… God, that stings so much.
Finally, I answer him the only way I know how. “I have to leave soon.”
Silence fills the space between us like a sudden rainstorm, extinguishing our banter. The noise of the restaurant seems to grow louder, and when I look up, I see Cal’s expression has darkened.
“Why?” He moves closer. “I thought you liked it here.”
His presence is so soothing, but it’s time for reality. I have to let him go. A flash of pain tightens my chest.
“I’m not as free as I’d hoped,” I say quietly.
Our eyes don’t meet. I watch as Cal traces his finger through the condensation on my glass. “Do you have a departure date?”
I shake my head. “Reggie’s working out the details. It will probably be in the next few days. Maybe a week.”
Unable to stop myself, I look up for his warm hazel eyes. My sadness is reflected back at me, and I want to step forward into his arms, hold onto him—as if I have the right to keep him.
“Do you think you can stick around for the race?” he asks “It’s only a few days away.”
“I don’t know.” I don’t know what’s coming next.
“You can definitely stay for the gala. It’s tomorrow night, and I need a date.”
“I’m sure you can find a date.”
A hint of that smile plays around his lips. “Of course, I can find a date, but I want to go with you.”
This time I do move forward into his arms. They tighten around me at once, and my cheek is pressed against his chest. He holds me, and I inhale deeply the spicy-citrusy scent of his clothes. It takes me back to the first night when he loaned me his shirt, which I never plan to return. Ever. The thought of letting him go forms an aching hole in my chest.
His hand moves up, sliding over the back of my neck. His fingers thread in my hair. “Maybe I’ll visit you in Texas. It’s close to Vegas, right?”
That makes me laugh, and I pull back to meet his eyes. “Compared to what? Here?”
“I think I’d like Vegas.”
“I’m sure you would. It’s perfect for playboys.”
The hostess comes to lead us to our table. Cal gives me a tight smile and steps back, catching my hand and threading our fingers. I study his perfect ass in those jeans as we walk, and my mind is frantic trying to think of something, anything I can do to change my situation. I’m so far out of my league in this place. I have been since the first night I attended that charity ball.
Our table is outdoors on a small patio overlooking the sea. Only a few other diners share the space, and a blonde waitress quickly appears.
“I’ll have the burger and chips,” Cal says, handing her the oversized menu.
“To drink, Monsieur?”
“What are you having?” Cal asks me.
“I’ll try the sushi.”
“Good choice.” He glances up at the waitress. “Vinho Verde.”
She nods and takes down my order before disappearing into the restaurant.
“Green wine?” I say, taking a sip of my water.
“Look at you! Picking up the language.” He smiles, and gives me a wink. “It’s not actually green, but it is effervescent. I think you’ll like it.”
“So it’s like champagne?”
“Hm,” he looks out over the sea. “It’s lighter. Better for summer.”
Our waiter returns with two white wine glasses, and a tall, skinny bottle. She serves us both, and places the bottle in an ice bucket.
Cal holds his glass out to me. “To memorable days.”
I give him a little clink and take a sip. It’s crisp with mineral notes, and the fizz is so delicate. “It tastes like a day at the beach.”
“Which is what we should be doing right now. Rowan has the right idea.”
“Right.” I’ve been so distracted since the car ride. “Where did Rowan and Ava go?”
“Paparazzi showed up. They’ll hound him until the race, I’m sure. Anyway, they took off for Occitan just before you arrived.”
I have to remember to act surprised about the race, even though Reggie told me about it in the car. “What race?”
“Apparently my older brother signed up for the Grand Prix this morning. I do hope
you stick around for it. I’d like you to see it.”
Taking another sip of my wine, I think about all of it—time, Reggie, the race. “Remember how you told me Rowan kicked your uncle out of the kingdom?”
“He tried, anyway. Guess who’s back?”
“He came with us,” I say, thinking as the server places an artistically arranged platter of sushi in front of me.
“Nigiri, shrimp tempura, tuna…” he points out the different items on my plate, and I smile up at him in thanks.
Cal grabs a knife and cuts his burger. I lift the chopsticks and hope I remember how to use them. It’s been years since Seth showed me how. Thinking that name makes my old life feel so far away. I can’t imagine going back to it and ever feeling the same. Come on, Zelda, you’re smarter than this! You’ve out-conned Reggie once before; you can do it again.
“You said Rowan didn’t tell you exactly what made him do it… Did he at least give you the gist?” Anything I can use? I don’t say.
Cal leans back in his chair, chewing a bite of burger watching me. I mix a pinch of Wasabi into the small pool of soy sauce and go for a rich, pink slice of tuna. Holding my breath, I position the sticks in my hand and pick it up. Balance… it manages to ride from the sauce to my mouth without falling in my lap. The fresh flavor of good fish fills my mouth.
“Good work.” He grins. “I saw you sweating that bite.”
“I wasn’t sweating! It’s just been a while…”
He shakes his head and picks up a French fry. “Let me think… it was something about Hubert and forming an alliance with Twatrington that would essentially unite the two countries under a new government.”
“Can he do that?” My brow lines, and I look up at Cal still watching me.
He does a little shrug. “With a majority of votes he could. The economy was bad. Hubert was head of the Parliament at the time, and while the king is the titular leader, he doesn’t have total control.”
“It’s not a true monarchy?” I actually sound like I know what I’m talking about.
He takes another bite. “Constitutional.”
I go for the pink and green shrimp roll. It’s covered in a layer of rice with salty seaweed on top.